/  e  Pfif  tit- 


THE  LIBRARY 

OF 

THE  UNIVERSITY 
OF  CALIFORNIA 

LOS  ANGELES 


s^ 


THE 


RAINBOW    CREED. 


A   STORY  OF  THE  TIMES. 
•..     riCU 


•' 


"  Our  Hermes  suits  his  reasons  to  the  times; 
At  least  I  think  so,  — since  he  bids  thee  drop 
Self-will  for  prudent  counsel.     Yield  to  him  ! 
When  the  wise  err,  their  wisdom  makes  their  shame." 

—  Mrs.  Browning's  Prometheus. 


BOSTON: 
WILLIAM   F.   GILL  &  CO., 

151   WASHINGTON  ST. 

£,7*3 


Entered  according  to  Act  of  Congre. 

ADAM   HAMILTON, 
In  the  office  of  the  Librarian  of  Congress  at  Washington. 


PREFACE. 


WHY  do  ye  speak,  O  writer  bold,  so  lightly  of 
sacred  things  ? 

Please  read  the  book,  and  if  you  find  therein  un 
seemly  mirth,  burn  it,  lest  another  suffer  harm.  Vice 
puts  a  fool's  hat  on  Superstition's  head,  and  Religion  her 
self  invites  us  to  deride  the  follies  of  the  day,  even  as  in 
olden  time  she  made  Elijah  laugh  at  the  priests  of  Baal. 
It  is  true  the  latter  are  no  more,  but  those  of  Mammon 
now  are  at  the  altars,  and  it  might  be  well  to  mine  their 
temples.  There  is  a  dearth  of  soul :  and  of  love  we  feel 
a  woful  lack.  We  long  for  a  prophet  to  bring  their  subtile 
influence,  not  from  the  fountains  of  the  skies,  but  from 
those  that  have  their  source  within. 

Who  can  escape  the  evils  of  the  day  ?  *     The  infection 

*  "  The  last  article  in  The  New  York  Intelligencer  by  James 
Anthony  Froude  considers  the  Causes  of  Weakness  in  Mod 
ern  Protestant  Churches.  'But  Protestant  nations  have  been 
guilty,  as  nations,  of  enormous  crimes.  Protestant  individu 
als  who  profess  the  soundest  of  creeds  seem,  in  their  conduct, 
to  have  no  creed  at  all  beyond  a  conviction  that  pleasure  is 
pleasant,  and  that  money  will  purchase  it.  Political  corrup 
tion  grows  up  ;  sharp  practice  in  trade  grows  up  ;  dishonest 
speculations,  short  weights  and  measures,  and  adulteration 
of  food.  The  whole  commercial  and  political  Protestant 
world,  on  both  sides  of  the  Atlantic,  has  blossomed  out  into 
transactions  of  this  kind,  and  the  clergy  have  for  the  most 
part  sat  by  silent,  and  occupy  themselves  in  carving  and  pol 
ishing  into  completeness  their  schemes  of  doctrinal  salvation. 
They  shrink  from  offending  the  wealthy  members  of  their 

oo 


1 213265 


ii.  PREFACE. 

from  indigent  homes  ascends  the  slopes  of  Beacon  Hill, 
and,  baffling  the  efforts  of  the  best  physicians,  desolates 
the  most  luxurious  ones.  What  did  Louis  Napoleon 
win  for  self  when  all  was  done  ?  Therefore  shut  not, 
O  man  of  superior  advantages,  the  doors  of  thy  heart, 
and  lock  them  with  the  key  of  conventional  Religion, 
nor  even  those  of  thy  house,  on  whose  threshold  servile 
Fashion  too  often  stands  to  keep  salvation  out.  Seest 
thou  not  the  bridge  which  spans  the  gulf  that  separates 
the  hovel  from  the  palace,  and,  hark !  nearest  thou  not  a 
tramping  upon  it,  the  tramping  of  the  troops  of  Death  ? 
Behold  the  word  on  their  banners,  —  "  FRATERNITY  ; " 
and  that  which  is  written  on  their  blades,  —  "JUSTICE." 
This  ghastly  throng  passes  hither  and  thither,  and  naught 
can  stay  its  terrible  power  but  one  simple  thing,  —  and 
that  is  to  let  our  greatness  lie  in  nearness  to,  not  in  dis 
tance  from,  the  suffering  men  below.  Distress  is  fuel  to 
feed  the  flame  of  Love.  For  what  can  Heaven  be  but 
the  cure  of  Hell  ?  The  Most  High  live,  and,  if  need  be, 
die.  for  the  good  of  those  beneath  them  ;  and  it  is  this 
operation  of  the  Holy  Spirit  of  Goodness,  as  possessed 
by  them,  which  constitutes  the  glory  of  God  and  the  true 
Vicarious  Atonement. 

congregations.  They  withdraw  into  the  affairs  of  the  other 
world,  and  Ie*ve  the  present  world  to  the  men  of  business 
and  the  Devil.  —  Boston  Transcript,  April  2,  1873. 


BOOK    I. 

MALCOLM   LAWSON    AND    ORA- 
TONE    BUZZ. 


I. 


GENESIS   AND   EXODUS. 

"  Dulcia  non  meruit,  qui  non  gustavit  amara." 

JEAN  PAUL  says,  " The  origin  of  a  man  is  as 
dark  as  his  disappearance  ;  the  best  time  to 
sow  is  when  thick  fogs  prevail."  This  brings  be 
fore  us  the  familiar  fact  that  the  life  of  an  upright 
man  is  a  clear  gain  to  the  world,  and  allows  us 
to  infer  that  he  is  the  fruit  of  a  seed  sown  by  the 
inscrutable  Source  of  Thought  in  the  muddy  yet 
fertile  soil  of  earthly  existence,  —  which  fruit  is 
not  to  be  classed  with  its  husk,  but  to  receive 
treatment  according  to  its  value.  The  aspect  of 
the  difficulties  which  beset  the  culture  of  this  fruit, 
especially  in  the  fields  of  theology,  where  we  have 
had  some  experience,  has  induced  us  to  sketch  a 
scene  or  two  from  the  life  of  a  student  called  Mal 
colm  Lawson.  If,  then,  the  reader  will  follow  us 
into  a  fine  house,  in  the  good  city  of  Bragville,  he 
shall  hear  him  tell  his  intended  bride  about  his 
early  childhood  and  youth. 

"  I  lived  with  my  step-brothers  till  I  was  ten  or 
eleven  years  old.  We  often  quarreled  with  one 
another,  and  even  had  recourse  to  the  fist  to  arbi 
trate  between  us.  I  am  sorry  to  say  that  I  was 
as  bad  as  the  rest.  But  many  of  the  neighbors 

(5) 


6  MALCOLM  LAWSON. 

thought  I  was  the  most  mischievous  of  the  lot ; 
and,  to  tell  you  the  truth,  appearances  were  sadly 
against  me,  and  greatly  in  favor  of  the  others.  My 
brothers  were  always  so  neat  and  dignified,  and  my 
sister  was  rather  prim.  What  piles  of  Sunday-school 
tickets  they  had !  They  never  ran  off  alone  into 
the  woods,  and  sought,  to  the  serious  injury  of  their 
brown  linen  pinafores,  the  nests  of  the  magpie  and 
hawk ;  nor  forgot  the  dinner-hour  in  listening  to  the 
wild  tales  of  the  Celtic  fishermen  who  mended  their 
nets  on  the  shore  within  sight  of  the  pigmy  thatched 
cottage  that  we  called  home.  Nor  did  they  scamper 
off  and  hide,  when  the  old  village  minister  dropped 
in,  lest  they  should  be  called  in  to  regale  the  ears 
of  the  household  with  a  hymn  or  a  part  of  a  psalm. 
No :  such  nice,  pious  children  as  they  appeared  to 
be  were  not  likely  to  be  in  the  wrong,  while  I,  who 
plead  guilty  to  all  those  crimes,  was  termed  an  un 
canny  changeling.  That,  you  must  know,  is  the 
miserable  substitute  of  the  fairies  for  the  rosy, 
plump  child  which  they  steal  from  the  new-made 
mother.  I  probably  got  the  name  from  my  soli 
tary  disposition,  being  often  found,  even  after  sun 
down,  in  the  haunted  spots  of  the  neighborhood. 
And  the  more  superstitious,  connecting  with  this 
peculiarity  the  difficulty  I  had  in  learning  by  heart 
my  weekly  portion  of  Scripture  which  was  dealt  out 
to  us,  —  as  Mrs.  Squeers  dosed  the  unwilling  ur 
chins  of  Dotheboys  Hall  with  sulphur  and  mo 
lasses, —  hinted  that  I  was  not  a  fit  companion 
for  the  more  apt  scholars,  who,  however,  profited 
so  little  by  their  instruction,  that,  the  moment  the 


MALCOLM  LAW  SON.  7 

teacher's  back  was  turned,  they  did  not  scruple  to 
pounce  upon  his  early  strawberries  and  other  horti 
cultural  delicacies." 

"  The  little  hypocrites  !  "  exclaimed  Jennie. 

"  But  the  difference  between  me  and  the  other 
children,"  continued  Malcolm,  "  was  essentially  one 
of  races,  my  mother  being  a  pure  Celt,  while  theirs 
was  a  Scandinavian,  like  my  father  and  the  most 
of  the  neighbors.  I  naturally  took  after  my  High 
land  forefathers,  who  loved  the  freedom  of  the  for 
est  and  the  heath,  while  my  brothers  inherited  an 
aptitude  for  trade  and  other  practical  abilities  that 
characterize  the  Scandinavian  element  in  Darkland. 
This  fact  was  far  beyond  the  reflection  of  the  place, 
and  I  had  to  suffer  for  my  exceptional  character." 

"  But  your  mother  —  did  she  not  take  your  part  ?" 
asked  Jennie. 

"  My  poor  mother  died  when  I  was  little  more 
than  a  baby.  All  I  remember  of  her  was  the  pale 
face  which  hung  over  my  crib  in  a  frame  of  dark 
brown  hair,  and  the  sweet  voice  which  sung  me  to 
sleep  when  I  had  grown  tired  of  playing  with  a  curl, 
or  of  looking  up  into  two  deep  black  eyes." 

"And  your  father?"  asked  Jennie  again,  with  a 
less  confident  voice. 

"  He  was  a  changed  man,  they  told  me,  from 
the  hour  of  my  mother's  death.  His  grief  was 
deepened  by  the  consciousness  that  he  might  have 
been  kinder  to  her.  His  other  children  having  in 
duced  him  to  share  their  natural  prejudice  against 
their  step-mother,  he  had  to  suffer  for  his  want  of 
discrimination.  He  died  several  years  afterward. 


8  MALCOLM  LAW  SON. 

Here  Malcolm  paused,  and  appeared  lost  in 
thought.  The  ready  sympathy  of  the  maiden 
came  to  his  aid.  She  took  his  hand,  as  if  to  as 
sure  him  that  she  was  there  to  compensate  him  for 
his  bereavements,  and  asked  what  he  did  after  his 
father's  death. 

"  Oh,  pardon  me,"  he  replied,  bethinking  himself, 
"  I  was  about  to  say,  that,  as  father  left  us  without 
property,  we  were  thrown  on  the  kindness  of  rela 
tives,  and  obliged  to  conform  to  their  will.  Having 
come  to  the  funeral,  they  held  a  consultation  in 
regard  to  our  future.  A  good-humored  uncle,  to 
my  great  joy,  adopted  my  sister ;  a  friend  fancied 
my  brothers,  who  gladly  went  off  with  him  ;  and  I 
was  left  alone  in  the  care  of  my  grandmother,  the 
only  surviving  relative  on  my  mother's  side.  She 
was  very  kind  to  me  ;  and,  content  to  share  her 
humble  fare,  quite  happy  in  her  sympathetic  and 
instructive  society,  I  staid  in  Cathorm  till  I  was 
fifteen.  During  all  this  time  I  was  in  the  gar 
den  of  Eden.  It  is  true,  thorns  and  thistles  grew 
there  as  well  as  elsewhere,  but  they  were  not  thorns 
and  thistles  to  me ;  or,  if  they  were,  I  was  one 
of  themselves,  rejoicing  in  the  same  sunshine,  in 
the  same  delightful  air,  taking  no  thought  for  the 
morrow,  having  no  consciousness  of  want.  I  toiled 
not,  neither  did  I  spin,  yet  his  Royal  Highness  the 
Prince  of  Wales,  in  all  the  splendor  of  his  court, 
could  not  have  been  happier  than  I.  But  this  was 
not  to  last  forever.  The  angels  came  at  length, 
and,  with  fiery  swords  in  hand,  drove  me  from  my 
paradise." 


MALCOLM  LAW  SON.  9 

"Angels  of  Darkness,  you  mean  !  "  exclaimed  the 
young  lady. 

"  Yes,  indeed,"  replied  Malcolm.  "  I  had  to  yield 
to  Death  and  Necessity.  They  showed  no  mercy, 
and  I  was  thrust  out  of  my  ignorant  but  happy 
indolence,  and  made  to  work  for  a  living.  Nor 
do  I  regret  it,  now  that  I  think  of  it,"  he  added,  re 
flectively  ;  and,  indeed,  he  had  no  cause,  consid 
ering  that,  after  being  fitted  to  enjoy  it  by  his  expe 
rience  in  the  thorny  region  without,  he  had  obtained 
a  different  Eden,  and  a  fair  Eve  into  the  bargain. 

"  My  grandmother,"  he  went  on,  "  fell  ill,  and 
died.  Her  loss  was  far  more  painful  than  either 
my  father's  or  mother's ;  for  I  had  grown  old  enough 
to  realize  all  that  she  had  been  to  me.  Having  been 
herself  alone  in  the  world,  the  last  daughter  of  a 
once  powerful  family,  she  had  lavished  the  full 
wealth  of  her  affection  upon  me.  She  had  always 
received  me  with  open  arms  when  I  ran  to  pour 
into  her  ready  ears  the  tales  of  my  childish  woes. 
She  never  had  spoken  a  harsh  word  to  me,  although 
I  am  conscience  stricken  at  the  thought  of  how  much 
occasion  I  must  have  given  her.  Her  last  crust  had 
been  shared  with  me,  her  last  prayer  had  been  made 
for  me,  and  her  last  breath  had  blessed  me.  My  child 
ish  heart  was  frozen  by  this,  my  greatest  calamity. 
I  was  stupefied  by  sorrow.  Not  till  the  gates  of  the 
tomb  were  closed  upon  her  clay  did  I  obtain  relief. 
Then  the  plaintive  dirge  of  the  Celtic  mourners, 
who  followed  it  thither,  thawed  my  heart,  and  I  was 
flooded  with  grief." 

A  tear  of  sympathy  glistened  on  the  cheek  of  the 


I0  MALCOLM  LAWSON. 

young  lady,  who,  having  some  years  before  lost  her 
own  mother,  realized  only  too  well  how  he  must 
have  suffered.  Malcolm  saw  it,  and  continued  his 
story  in  a  tone  less  sad. 

"  Cathorm  could  no  longer  remain  my  home.  For 
the  first  time  it  appeared  bleak,  frigid,  inhospitable. 
All  its  brightness  and  beauty  seemed  to  have  de 
parted  with  my  late  friend.  But  a  nameless  attrac 
tion  made  me  linger  amid  the  scenes  of  past  hap 
piness.  Yet,  having  no  means  of  support  in  this 
remote  region,  I  had  to  go  to  a  Scotch  friend  in 
the  south,  who  offered  me  a  situation  in  his  count 
ing-house.  I  was  kindly  received  ;  and  for  a  while 
amused  by  the  change,  and  impressed  by  the  gran 
deur  of  a  city,  I  was  not  unhappy.  But,  reaction 
soon  coming,  I  pined  for  my  old  home  in  the  north, 
and  became  foolishly  discontented.  I  only  per 
ceived,  without  being  aule  to  realize,  the  propriety 
of  exerting  myself  to  excel  in  my  present  vocation, 
in  order  to  find  the  solacement  I  required.  There 
fore  I  could  not  but  dislike  it  together  with  other 
circumstances  of  my  sojourn  there.  The  city  itself, 
which  I  had  admired  so  much  at  first,  became  a 
confused  mass  of  fog-and-soot-begrimed  brick  and 
stone, —  a  species  of  labyrinth  in  which  an  evil  gen 
ius  held  me  captive.  How  I  wished  for  wings,  and 
other  impossibilities,  that  I  might  escape  from  its 
dust  and  din,  and  fly  to  the  purple  hills  where  I  had 
listened  to  the  bleat  of  the  wandering  sheep  and 
the  wail  of  the  plover !  And  how  I  longed  for  my 
nooks  among  the  cliffs,  where  I  had  sat  and  rejoiced 
with  the  sea-birds  that  speckled  the  sky  overhead, 


MALCOLM  LAWSON.  II 

watching  the  big  billows  come  towering  in  from 
afar  to  worship,  with  fanatic  zeal,  their  lofty  gods 
of  stone,  and  lay  at  their  feet  the  treasures  of  the 
deep,  —  endless  heaps  of  sea-weed  and  shells  !  My 
friends  soon  saw  that  something  ailed  me,  and  did 
their  best  to  console  me  in  their  own  way.  But  in 
vain. 

"  A  mountain  goat  will  not  fraternize  with  south 
down  sheep.  The  people  and  the  place  were  alike 
good,  yet  I  had  little  pleasure  in  either.  An  oppres 
sive  melancholy  stole  in  upon  me,  which,  together 
with  my  native  fogginess,  made  me  the  butt  of  my 
companions,  and  did  not  add  to  my  usefulness  in 
the  office.  I  sometimes  felt  that  I  belonged  to  a 
necropolis,  and  the  desk  was  the  coffin  to  which  I 
was  obliged  to  hurry  at  cock-crow.  To  give  you 
some  idea  of  how  I  then  was,  I'll  tell  you  a  dia 
logue  that  I  overheard,  between  my  employer  and 
a  friend  relative  to  my  merits.  The  former,  in  an 
swer  to  the  question  how  he  liked  me,  said,  'I  canna 
make  heed  or,  tail  of  the  lad.  He's  always  dreaming 
about  something  or  'ither  that  has  no  more  to  dae 
wi'  his  work  than  the  mon  in  the  moon.  He's  not 
good  for  muckle  here.'  '  Why,  is  the  boy  stupid  ? ' 
asked  the  friend.  '  No,  I  cannot  say  he's  stupid,' 
replied  my  employer  :  '  he's  kind  of  dopit.  He  daes 
things  as  if  he  did  not  care  whether  he  did  them  or 
no.  The  boy  is  more  like  a  bogle  than  anything 
else.  Where  do  you  think  I  found  him  the  other 
nicht,  as  I  was  comin'  hame  frae  Tarn's  ? '  'I  can't 
say.'  '  Weel,  as  I  was  comin'  along  on  the  far-awa' 
side  of  the  auld  kirkyard,  aboot  twelve  o'clock,  —  it 


12  MALCOLM  LAV/SON. 

is  awfu'  lonesome  doon  among  yon  tall,  naked  firs, 
mind  ye,  and  I  walked  pretty  middlin'  quick,  as  I 
dinna  like  to  stop  in  sic  places  any  longer  than  I 
can  help,  —  I  heard  a  maist  unearthly  singin'.  A 
cauld  chill  cam'  over  me,  and  I  stopped  as  if  some- 
budy  had  knocked  me  on  the  heed.  I  was  just 
abou^  to  take  to  my  heels,  when  I  thocht  I  kenn't 
the  voice.  Pluckin'  up  my  courage,  1  walked  up  to 
the  dyke,  and  keeked  over,  —  and  whom  dae  you 
think  I  saw  ?  Our  Malcolm  :  there  he  sat,  astrad 
dle  of  auld  McBride's  tombstone,  singin'  ane  o'  they 
wild  Highland  songs  of  his,  carin'  no  more  about 
the  bogles  than  an  auld  hen  just  gone  to  roost. 
"What  are  you  daein'  there?"  says  I  to  him.  He 
stopped  the  singin',  and,  turnin'  round  his  heed,  he 
saw  it  was  I,  and  said,  jumpin'  down  and  walkin'  up 
to  me,  "A  fine  nicht,  Mr.  Donald"  "  Weel,  Mal 
colm,"  says  I,  "  this  is  a  queer  place  to  be  this  time 
o'  nicht."  "  Oh/'  says  he,  "  I  could  na  sleep,  so  I 
cam'  out  to  get  a  sicht  of  the  moon  through  the 
ruined  arches  of  the  auld  abbey."  "And  did  you 
never  see  a  bogle?"  says  I.  "Plenty  of  them," 
says  he,  and  he  walked  home  to  the  city,  as  if  he 
had  been  to  a  soiree  at  the  kirk.' " 

"  You  saw  no  ghosts ! "  exclaimed  the  conscien 
tious  Jennie. 

"  Yes,  I  did,"  he  replied,  decidedly,  yet  with 
rather  a  sad  look. 

Jennie  was  puzzled  ;  but  on  his  adding  that  he 
often  felt  that  he  was  something  of  a  ghost  himself, 
she  caught  a  glimpse  of  his  meaning. 

"  Yes,"  he  continued,  with  an  absent  air  :  "  it  has 


MALCOLM  LAWSON.  13 

occurred  to  me  more  than  once  that  I  was  only  a 
spectre,  obliged  to  appear,  for  some  mysterious  rea 
son,  during  a  brief  period  in  the  masquerade  which 
some  call  Life,  and  then  to  vanish,  with  or  without 
the  object  of  my  coming,  which,"  he  added,  with  a 
smile,  "  may  be  only  a  dance  with  a  suitable  part 
ner  or  the  opposite." 

"  Only  a  dance!"  repeated  his  companion,  a  shada 
of  vague  fear  passing  over  her  young  face. 

"  Yes,  only  a  dance,  and  often  a  horrible  one  ;  for, 
as  I  whirl  in  its  mazes,  I  see  the  life-flush  of  beauty 
strangely  blend  with  the  ghastly  pallor  of  the  dead." 

"  Nonsense  ! "  exclaimed  Jennie  :  "  all  that  comes 
of  riding  on  McBride's  tombstone.  If  you  continue 
in  that  strain  you  will  frighten  me  away.  Already 
you  have  sown  in  my  mind  the  seeds  of  dreadful 
dreams." 

"  I  beg  pardon,  Jennie.  But  was  it  surprising, 
seeing  how  few  friends  I  had  amongst  the  living, 
that  I  sought  the  society  of  the  mystic  dead,  no, 
not  dead,  yet"  — 

Here  he  paused,  and  Jennie  replied,  "  Perhaps 
not,  but  don't  talk  about  them  any  more  to-night. 
Wait  till  next  Sunday,  when  Dr.  Pluffle  will  be 
here.  He  will  be  sure  to  sympathize  with  you." 
And  she  finished  with  a  sly  look. 

"  No  doubt,"  returned  Malcolm,  who  did  not  rel 
ish  the  suggestion,  "  he  is  sepulchral  enough  to 
sympathize  with  a  graveyard  turned  inside  out." 

At  her  request  to  tell  her  more  about  himself,  he 
continued  :  "  That  encounter  with  my  master  was  only 
one  of  the  many  instances  which  satisfied  my  friends 


I4  MALCOLM  LAWSON. 

that  I  would  never  make  a  merchant.  What  were 
they  to  do  with  me  ?  So  far  as  they  could  see,  I 
was  fit  for  nothing  under  the  sun,  but  singin'  High 
land  songs  and  ridin'  on  tombstones.  There  was 
no  end  to  the  jokes  I  had  to  suffer  for  that  moon 
light  exploit  of  mine.  '  We  maun  leave  him  to 
Providence/  they  wisely  concluded,  and  so  I  was 
left  to  the  watchful  supervision  of  that  Being.  This 
was  the  best  thing  that  could  have  happened  to  me. 
I  grew  all  the  better  for  being  thus  thrown  on  the 
rocks.  Adversity,  luckily,  is  a  she-wolf.  My  roman 
tic  disposition  impelled  me  to  go  to  sea,  or  indeed 
anywhere  to  escape  the  bondage  of  trade.  Going 
to  sea  was  the  most  feasible  thing.  I  made  what 
little  preparation  I  could,  and,  one  bright  October 
morning,  took  my  traps  in  one  hand,  and  kissing 
the  other  to  the  gilt  clock  of  the  steeple  opposite, 
about  the  only  thing  I  learned  to  like,  I  stole  down 
to  the  quay,  where  I  was  not  long  in  making  terms 
with  a  captain  ;  and  in  a  fortnight  I  was  a  thousand 
miles  on  my  way  to  Hong  Kong." 

"  And  you  found  this  a  change  for  the  better  ?  " 
"  In  some  respects,"  he  replied.  "  For  the  first 
few  days,  as  long  as  we  remained  on  smooth  water, 
within  sight  of  charming  shores,  I  liked  it  much. 
But  when  we  got  out  to  sea  I  had  a  far  different 
experience.  Not  that  I  cared  about  the  transient 
sea-sickness  and  the  hard  work :  but  my  compan 
ions  were  ignorant,  and  even  brutal.  To  recall  my 
early  life  in  the  forcastle  is  to  bring  Dante's  Inferno 
before  me.  I  will  not  dwell  upon  it.  Yet  on  deck 
I  was  happy.  I  enjoyed  the  ever-changing  face  of 


MALCOLM  LAWSON.  15 

heaven,  and  even  liked  what  the  other  sailors  ab 
horred,  —  the  furling  of  the  royals.  My  willingness 
to  undertake  this  fatiguing  duty  made  them  friendly 
to  me.  The  continued  exposure  did  me  good,  and  I 
thrived  in  every  physical  respect,  though,  if  you  had 
seen  me,  anointing  the  rigging,  a  bucket  of  tar 
dangling  from  my  neek,  seated  in  the  loop  of  rope 
called  a  boatswain's  chair,  you  would  not  have 
thought  me  handsome.  But  I  learned  to  call  it  a 
throne,  seeing"  — 

"  I  thought  you  disliked  a  seaman's  life,  all  things 
considered." 

"  I  would  not  gladly  return  to  it.  Thrones  are 
properly  termed  thorny  seats.  I  worked  hard  to 
resign  my  sceptre,  a  marlin-spike,  if  you  please, 
and  my  crown,  the  sou'-wester.  But  there  was  no 
usurper  at  hand,  —  and  on  this  account  I  slept  bet 
ter  than  most  kings." 

"  Yet  you  succeeded  at  last,  it  seems." 

"  Yes  :  I  soon  saw  that  unless  I  exerted  myself  to 
throw  aside  my  insignia,  I  should  suffer  from  the 
burden,  like  all  rulers.  Therefore  I  labored  for  a 
less  onerous  task.  I  talked  with  foreign  sailors, 
learned  more  or  less  of  their  language,  devoured  an 
odd  grammar  or  two,  swallowed  a  dictionary,  wash 
ing  it  down  with  novels,  and  so  forth.  And,  though 
I  suffered  from  ensuing  indigestion,  I  recovered  at 
last.  I  was  bound  to  learn  something  ;  and,  becom 
ing  feverish,  my  appetite  for  knowledge  increased, 
and  I  had  to  gratify  it  as  I  best  knew.  The  world 
bent  to  my  will,  acknowledging  the  legality  of  my 
self  assumed  title,  and  I  had  more  than  enough 


1 6  MALCOLM  LAW  SON. 

tribute  paid  me.  And  now  you  come,  or  rather  I 
come  to  you,  from  afar.  I  tell  you  the  human  will 
is  inscrutable, — a  direct  emanation  from  the  Source 
of  all  Power,  even  in  the  bosom  of  the  lad  who  is 
swept  by  a  pitiless  wave  from  the  helm  of  a  coaster." 


II. 


THE   MERCHANT   PRINCE. 

"  The  nations'  Life  upon  their  bonds  depends, 
The  blood  wherein  Disease  with  Health  contends. 
To  head  and  heart  too  much  is  apt  to  course, 
And  thus  the  other  portions  lose  their  force. 
Therefore  intestine  strikes  and  wars  arise, 
Which  some  destroy,  and  others  paralyze." 

—  J.  Sweep. 

THOMAS  CRISP  was  a  most  respectable  man. 
Born  of  poor  Huberton  parents,  he  had  at  an 
early  age  emigrated  to  the  West,  and  quickly  grown 
in  opulence  with  the  place  which  had  become  his 
home.  Taken  altogether,  he  was  not  a  bad  type  of 
New  Humbleton  shrewdness  in  business  matters, 
and  of  mental  mediocrity  in  every  other  respect.  A 
little  more  than  conventionally  religious  from  the 
first,  he  placed  his  trust  in  the  Lord,  as  well  as  in 
his  surplus  balance,  and  thus  far  never  regretted  the 
division  in  his  faith.  He  was  now  situated  like  Job, 
before  that  unhappy  man  had  been  plagued  by  the 
Devil.  A  kind  fate  was  pouring  into  his  lap  the 
horn  of  plenty,  and  he  sat  portly,  complacent  and 
pious,  thoroughly  enjoying  the  spectacle  of  his  pros 
perity. 

But  was  Mr.  Crisp  really  a  Christian  ?    He  thought 
so,  being  the  flattered  favorite  of  his  denomination, 
2  (17) 


1 8  MALCOLM  LAW  SON. 

which  finds  such  men  uncommonly  useful.  Either 
that  or  the  native  vanity  of  our  old  friend  persuaded 
him  that  he  was  eloquent,  and  he  lost  no  opportunity 
of  displaying  his  imagined  gift.  His  religious 
friends  had  made  him  president  .of  the  great  Con 
tinental  Miracle  Protection  Association,  and  it  was 
a  satisfaction  to  see  him  in  the  chair  thereof.  How 
evangelical  his  presence,  how  vehement  his  tone,  as 
he  rose  and  denounced  this  infidel  age,  and  threat 
ened  it  with  the  fate  of  Sodom  and  Gomorrah  if  it 
did  not  repent  and  stand  up  for  the  Lord  ! 

His  prophetic  eye  probably  foresaw  the  recent 
conflagrations,  but  realizing  the  overwhelming  power 
of  his  avenging  God  and  the  feebleness  of  all  hu 
man  resistance  thereto,  he  did  not  think  it  worth 
his  while  to  prepare  the  fire  department  for  those 
calamities.  Nor  did  it  ever  occur  to  him,  until  he 
saw  his  cherished  properties  disappear,  that  Man 
sard  roofs  provoked  the  appetites  of  fiery  dragons. 
Therefore  Mr.  Crisp  maintained  with  dclat  his  social 
position  as  a  defender  of  the  Faith. 

His  enthusiasm  in  the  cause  of  homely  morality, 
before  which  the  word  "mere"  is  often  prefixed, 
never  equaled  his  zeal  for  the  propagation  of  his 
religion.  Yet  he  could  not  be  called  a  hypocrite. 
He  was  simply  one  of  those  well-known  beings,  some 
times  termed  Pharisees,  who  are  so  permeated  by  the 
odor  of  respectability  and  sanctity  that  few  detect  that 
of  their  worldliness  and  sin,  be  these  either  past  or 
present.  Many  years  ago  Mr.  Crisp  had  speculated 
in  whiskey,  and  that  with  signal  success.  This  for 
tunate  event  gave  him  the  needed  start,  and  laid  the 


MALCOLM  LAWSON.  19 

corner-stone  of  his  opulence,  which  was  gradually 
built  up  by  industry  and  skill.  But  these  were  as 
sisted  by  a  mysterious  and  lucrative  connection  with 
some  doubtful  railroad  companies  and  land-grabbing 
enterprises.  However,  we  must  remember  the 
character  of  the  present  time,  and  not  erect  too 
high  a  standard  for  the  judgment  of  such  pioneers 
as  Mr.  Crisp,  who  do  so  much  to  develop  the  re 
sources  of  the  country  and  extend  the  empire  of 
Christianity. 

To  atone  for  his  peccadillos,  he  now  devoted  much 
time  and  money  to  the  service  of  his  Maker.  Not 
merely  interested  in  the  conversion  of  Pacific  Is 
lands,  he  also  subscribed  liberally  to  various  home 
charities,  especially  to  all  schemes  for  dispensing  the 
Gospel  to  the  poor.  Standing  midway  between  the 
old  and  new  Schools  of  Theology,  he  did  not  object 
to  free  churches,  and  on  one  occasion  gave  ten  thou 
sand  dollars  toward  the  erection  of  a  steeple  two  hun 
dred  and  fifty  feet  high,  —  "  an  act  of  beneficence," 
the  new  sexton  warmly  remarked,  "which  would 
carry  his  name  down  to  remote  posterity."  While 
we  gazed  upon  this  wonderful  piece  of  modern  arch 
itecture,  an  irreverent  companion  hinted  something 
about  Midas,  saying  the  deacon  had  done  more  to 
enlarge  his  purse  than  his  mind.  We  could  only 
hope  that  the  fullness  of  the  former,  in  addition  to 
his  faith  in  the  Lord,  would  compensate  him  for  the 
deficiencies  of  the  latter. 

His  only  child,  Miss  Jennie,  presided  over  his 
splendid  establishment  in  Upper  Tenth  Avenue. 
She  inherited  from  her  late  mother  a  fine  disposition 


20  MALCOLM  LAWSON. 

and  intellect,  and  owing  to  these,  rather  than  exter 
nal  advantages,  she  shone  brightly  among  her  com 
panions.  Her  generous  spirit  and  loving  nature  dis 
armed  the  envy  excited  by  her  superior  beauty  and 
attainments.  Yet  she  did  not  escape  entirely  unin 
jured  by  those  evil  influences  which,  lurking  in  the 
best  society,  sometimes  spoil  the  most  promising 
characters.  Superstition,  Flattery,  and  the  frivoli 
ties  of  Fashion  combined  to  darken  her  mind  and 
interfere  with  her  enjoyment  of  Life.  She  was  like 
a  rare  and  beautiful  plant  surrounded  by  weeds, 
which,  while  they  shield  it  from  the  storms  and 
the  hot  sun,  interfere  with  its  growth  and  make  the 
blossoms  small.  Her  father  idolized  her  and  gave 
her  all  she  desired,  from  the  finest  pictures  and 
jewels  to  trips  to  Europe  and  California.  Yet,  not 
content  with  all  those  blessings,  the  perverse  child, 
to  the  indignation  of  her  affluent  parent  and  the 
astonishment  of  the  world,  fell  in  love  with  a  poor 
young  man,  and,  with  a  strength  of  will  previously 
unsuspected,  insisted  on  having  him  for  a  husband 
In  him  you  may  recognize  the  Malcolm  of  the  pre 
ceeding  chapter. 


III. 

A  SLAVE-KING. 

NEXT  evening  Malcolm  resumed  his  story  to 
Jennie,  while  the  deacon  lay  half  asleep  on 
the  sofa. 

"  I  soon  saw  that,  if  learning  was  gold,  my  mind 
was  a  bank  ;  so  I  got  books,  and  increased  my  thought. 
And  I  believe  now  that,  if  I  had  not  been  bondsman 
to  my  body,  I  would  have  grown  infinitely  rich." 

"  No  wonder,  then,  you  thought  yourself  a  king  ; 
for  a  king,  according  to  the  original  Saxon,  is  one  who 
can  or  knows.  Besides,  the  Kingdom  of  Heaven 
being  within,  it  was  natural  for  you  to  lay  up  treas 
ures  there.  But  that  is  not  all.  Sou'wester  and 
spike  may  do  for  crown  and  sceptre,  but  how  about 
your  subjects  ? " 

"  Oh,  men  both  in  and  out  of  my  books,  these 
were  my  subjects,  —  prophets,  kings,  queens,  am 
bassadors.  Peter  the  Great  was  a  ship  carpenter :  I 
was  a  sailor." 

"  But  you  could  not  always  feel  so,  Malcolm  ? " 
asked  the  wondering  girl,  recalling  Dr.  Pluffle's 
morning  sermon  on  "What  is  man  that  thou  art 
mindful  of  him  ? " 

"  Alas,  no.  Circumstances  conspired  against  me, 
and  the  tides  of  Fate  came  rolling  down  upon  me ; 
but  I  bore  up,  and  thus  made  head  against  the  seas. 

(21) 


22  MALCOLM  LAWSON. 

A  castaway  once  on  the  African  coast,  I  helped  to 
bury  twenty  comrades  in  the  precious  sands,  I  being 
one  of  three  surviving  ;  the  shrunken  inmate  of 
a  pest-house,  I  moaned  for  months  ;  lost  in  the 
woods  of  Borneo,  I  wrestled  with  wild  beasts  ;  and, 
what  was  worse  by  far,  I  had  to  herd  with  dev 
ils.  But  even  if  I  shared  I  did  not  yield  to  the 
pangs  of  the  doomed.  I  lived  on,  hopefully,  and, 
when  I  had  no  love  for  my  kind,  I  had  some  for 
the  parrot  that  shared  my  wormy  bread,  and  for  the 
seas  that  battered  the  walls  of  my  castle." 

"  How  strange,  Malcolm !  You  make  me  think 
of  Epictetus,  the  slave  of  slaves,  yet  a  king  of  kings. 
How  wild  the  paradox  !  " 

"  Not  so  strange,  either  !  You  forget  that  the 
past  was  mine,  and  the  future,  too ;  and  the  stars 
told  me  that  I  was  richer  than  they.  And  the  sun, 
did  he  not  come  to  fill  my  coffers  with  gold,  brighter 
far,  yet  infinitely  less  burdensome,  than  that  of 
Ophir  ?  And  each  day,  was  it  not  the  blessing 
of  God  ?  What  more  did  I  need  ?  I  had  an  eye, 
and  I  beheld  the  universe ;  and  it  was  this  sim 
ple  thought  that  made  me  worthy  of  the  splendors  I 
saw,  and  brought  me  safe  to  thee,  fair  queen  of  my 
heart ! " 

"  Heart,  heart ! "  echoed  the  deacon,  waking  and 
putting  on  his  glasses  as  he  arose,  "  surely,  chil 
dren,  you  are  not  playing  cards  to-night  ? " 

"  Don't  fear,  papa,"  cried  his  child,  blushing ;  "  Mal 
colm  was  telling  me  about  a  king  and  a  queen  who 
lived  in  an  air  castle." 

"  Was  he  ?     But   positively,   children,  I   am   as- 


MALCOLM  LAWSON.  23 

tonished  that  you  should  not  be  engaged  more 
profitably.  Is  that  all  the  good  those  splendid 
words  of  Dr.  Pluffle  have  done  you  ?  Man,  man, 
thou  art  but  little  indeed,  when  all  is  said  and  done. 
If  such  as  Paul  can  call  himself  'the  offscouring  of 
all  things  unto  this  day,'  who  are  we  that  we  should 
plume  ourselves  on  our  reason  and  our  intelligence  ? 

0  my  children,  be  not  misled  by  the  false  images  of 
a  deceitful  imagination." 

"  But,  dear  papa,  don't  you  believe  in  poetry  ?  " 

"  Why,  yes,  my  dear  ;  I  am  never  tired  of  Dr. 
Watts  and  the  Hymns  of  the  Spirit.  But,  in  regard 
to  profane  writers,  I  have  not  seen  a  verse  for  an 
age  except  a  few  of  Sir  Walter  Scott's.  By  the 
xvay,  it  is  a  pity  that  even  Christian  men  of  genius 
should  turn  away  from  the  religious  side  of  life  to 
occupy  themselves  with  the  purely  secular." 

"  I  can't  say,"  said  Malcolm,  "  that  I  admire  Sir 
Walter.  What  he  writes  may  be  worth  reading,  but 
it  is  never  worth  quoting.  He  was  too  fond  of  real 
estate  to  be  spiritually  great." 

"  '  Too  fond  of  real  estate ' ! "  repeated  Mr.  Crisp 
with  deliberation  ;  "  what  in  all  the  world  do  you 
think  a  man  can  do  without  real  estate  ?  I  presume 
you  prefer  the  luxurious  life  in  the  castle  of  that  air- 
king  of  yours  to  our  poor  city  fare  here  ?  " 

"  Sometimes  I  do,  and  sometimes  I  don't.  I  ad 
mired  dissolving  views  of  the  world  ;  and,  although 

1  had  to  put  up  with  much  evil,  I  never,  in  any  one 
place,  saw  more  of  '  the  offscouring  of  all  things ' 
than  is  heaped  up  in  Bragville  here.     But  custom, 
they  say,  dulls  the  sense  ;  and  I  suppose  if  I  go,  as 


24  MALCOLM  LAWSON. 

you  wish,  to  a  divinity  school,  I  will  learn  to  take  it 
as  easy  as  the  best  of  them." 

"  God  forbid,  Malcolm,  that  you  should  lose  the 
sense  of  man's  lost  condition  without  a  Divine 
Saviour.  Do  not  misunderstand  me.  I  only  sought, 
in  my  blunt  way,  to  prune  your  rather  luxuriant  im 
agination." 

"  Oh,  papa ! "  cried  Jennie,  "  you  are  too  critical. 
After  all,  Malcolm's  castles  in  the  air  may  be  as 
real  as  your  mansions  in  the  skies." 

"  Jennie,  Jennie !  "  cried  Mr.  Crisp,  severely.  "This 
is  the  fourth  time  to-day  I  have  had  occasion  to 
blame  you  for  misuse  of  sacred  words.  I  must  insist 
on  your  being  more  careful  in  future." 

The  conversation  being  over  for  the  evening,  let 
us  give  our  version  of  Malcolm.  A  student  even 
under  the  most  adverse  circumstances,  he  had  la 
bored  to  fit  himself  for  a  teacher  in  some  school  ; 
and,  when  he  thought  he  knew  enough,  he  left  his 
ship  and  tried  to  find  a  situation  in  the  East  ;  but 
not  succeeding  he  went  West,  and  labored  according 
to  season  and  opportunity.  In  summer  he  would 
work  in  the  fields,  or  take  voyages  on  the  great 
lakes  ;  in  winter  he  did  whatever  he  could  find  to 
do.  Yet,  no  matter  what  happened  to  him,  he  never 
forgot  himself  or  his  King-ship,  as  he  playfully  called 
it  ;  for  he  loved  the  world,  and,  if  he  could  not  teach 
it,  he  was  glad  to  have  it  teach  him.  It  is  now  the 
same  with  the  son  of  man  as  it  has  ever  been  : 
"  The  foxes  have  holes,  and  the  birds  of  the  air  have 
nests  ; "  but  it  sometimes  happens  that  he  has  not 
"  where  to  lay  his  head." 


IV. 


AN    ITEM    IN    SATAN'S   TAX-BILL. 

ONE  Autumn  Malcolm  sailed  on  board  a  lake 
steamer.  During  a  dark  and  stormy  night, 
it  happened  to  come  into  collision  with  another, 
and  thereby  sustained  so  much  damage  that  it 
threatened  to  sink  in  an  hour.  Fortunately  the 
more  faulty  boat  escaped  with  little  or  no  injury, 
and,  apprehending  at  once  the  full  extent  of  the 
disaster,  lowered  her  boats  as  quickly  as  the  ugly 
weather  permitted,  and  sent  them  to  the  rescue. 
Meanwhile  great  confusion  prevailed  in  the  sink 
ing  vessel,  which  now  carried  her  full  complement 
of  passengers.  These,  roused  by  the  concussion, 
awoke  in  terror,  and,  pouring  frantically  on  the 
decks,  neutralized,  in  their  anxiety  to  save  and  be 
saved,  the  efforts  of  the  captain  and  crew.  In 
their  natural  but  selfish  struggle  for  places  in  the 
boats,  they  swept  discipline  aside,  and,  crowding 
in,  swamped  them  almost  the  moment  they  were 
launched.  During  this  time  the  fury  of  the  tem 
pest  increased,  and  the  darkness  thickened,  to  the 
hindrance  of  those  who  were  coming  to  the  rescue. 
What  a  change  !  The  mighty  ship,  the  floating 
city,  which  but  a  few  seconds  ago  so  proudly  de 
fied  the  forces  of  the  deep,  now  lies  at  their  mercy. 

(25) 


26  MALCOLM  LAWSON. 

The  cavalry  of  the  sea  shake  their  plumes  of  foam, 
and,  shooting  their  arrows  of  spray,  rush  tumul- 
tuously  upon  her ;  and  their  forms  have  a  ghastly 
sheen  in  the  blue  lights  of  the  lamps.  They  ride 
with  a  roar,  and  break  with  a  crash  on  the  power 
less  walls ;  and  the  noise  of  the  charge,  rising  above 
the  din  of  the  steam,  and  mingling  with  that  of  the 
storm,  drowns  the  shriek  of  distress  and  the  word 
of  command.  It  is  an  hour  of  awe  and  sickening 
suspense.  Many  have  perished  in  the  boats.  Young 
wives  and  husbands  are  there,  and,  dropping  the 
cup  of  their  first  connubial  joy,  they  stand  in  dis 
may  over  the  fragments.  Fathers  and  mothers  are 
there,  and  they  know  not  what  to  do  in  this  terrible 
gloom.  Faint  with  anguish,  or  wild  with  fear,  they 
press  their  babes  to  their  breasts,  or  seek,  with  un 
speakable  woe,  the  means  of  possible  safety,  while 
children  weep,  and  cling  to  their  knees,  or  dole 
fully  hang  on  their  skirts.  The  superstitious  are 
the  first  to  despair,  and,  clasping  their  hands,  they 
pray  for  the  help  which  only  can  come  with  the  ex 
ertion  of  muscle  and  brain.  And  some,  overborne 
by  sleepy  resignation,  the  ether  God-sent  at  the 
prospect  of  Death,  gaze  upon  the  appalling  sur 
roundings  in  stupid  bewilderment,  while  the  val 
iant  few  attend  to  the  remaining  boats,  which  are 
soon  safely  launched,  and  freighted  with  valuable 
life. 

"  Hurrah  !  the  boats  have  come  ! "  is  the  thrilling 
intelligence.  "  But  is  there  time  to  save  us  all  ? "  is 
the  fearful  doubt  which  sinks,  like  a  javelin,  into 
the  hearts  of  those  who  remain.  For,  although  the 


MALCOLM  LAWSON.  27 

boats  have  come,  and  are  being  filled  with  a  grate 
ful  throng,  there  is  not  a  moment  to  waste.  The 
bow  of  the  ship  is  ominously  depressed,  and  the  foe 
is  master  of  most  of  the  decks.  Alas  !  there  is  not 
time  to  save  them  all.  Another  minute  is  gone 
from  the  Earth,  and  several  are  left  to  a  watery 
tomb.  The  irresistible  forces  of  the  deep  sweep 
over  the  steamer,  —  but  one  more  faint  cry  from 
a  vortex  of  waves,  and  the  trouble  and  woe  of  a 
number  are  past.  The  elements  are  left  in  pos 
session  of  the  city  they  surprised,  and  they  still 
roar  on  with  fury  unabated. 

Malcolm  staid  on  the  ill -fated  ship  to  the  very 
last,  as  he  could  not  bear  to  leave  the  helpless  with 
out  aid.  But  the  instant  his  practised  eye  detected 
that  the  boats,  if  they  valued  their  safety,  would 
soon  be  obliged  to  sheer  off,  he  endeavored  to  get 
into  one,  and  was  in  the  act  of  reaching  it,  when  an 
old  gentlemen,  whom  some  accident  had  lamed,  be 
sought  his  aid.  The  youth  did  not  hesitate  a  mo 
ment,  and,  exerting  himself,  succeeded  in  helping 
him  into  the  boat,  yet  not  without  mishap  to  him 
self.  He  lost  his  balance,  while  standing  on  the 
gunwale,  and,  falling  into  the  sea,  would  surely  have 
perished,  had  he  not  caught  a  rope  which  providen 
tially  hung  from  the  stern.  No  swimmer  could 
hope  to  live  in  the  terrible  billows. 

This  was  one  of  those  frightfully  frequent  acci 
dents  due  to  the  want  of  "  mere  morality."  The 
man  on  the  look-out  had  allowed  his  vision  to  be 
obscured  by  drink.  Yet  how  can  the  ignorant 


28  MALCOLM  LAWSON. 

authors  of  the  distress  thus  entailed  upon  us  be 
blamed  ?  Hear  the  words  of  Jeremiah  Sweep  on 
this  subject :  "  Art  thou,  O  world,  to  be  a  perpetual 
martyr  to  thine  own  cant  and  foul  indifference  ? 
Withdraw  thy  vision  from  the  vacant  skies,  and  fix 
it  upon  thyself.  For  thou  hast  prayed  sufficiently 
long  to  the  fictions  of  thy  distempered  brain,  to  the 
dim  illusions  of  thy  present  ignorance  and  unde- 
velopment.  Thou  hast  still  a  heart.  Make  haste 
and  call  upon  the  Loving  Spirit  who  dwelleth 
therein  for  the  salvation  thou  requirest,  and  the 
gates  of  Heaven  will  open  at  once,  and  thou  shalt 
enter  and  be  filled  with  new  Life.  For  thine  is 
the  kingdom,  the  power,  and  the  glory  for  the  tak 
ing.  Canst  thou  not  see  with  some  of  thy  two 
billion  eyes  that  thy  Satan  is  the  attorney  of  God, 
the  unanswerable  advocate  of  good  on  the  negative 
side  ?  How  long  must  he  be  hired  to  teach  thee 
the  simple  truth  that  true  prosperity  can  only 
come  with  self-help  ?  Read  his  argument  in  the 
dismal  panorama  of  all  thy  suffering,  which  clearly 
demonstrates  the  falsity  of  Fraud,  and  the  truth  of 
Honesty.  And  weigh  well  the  exorbitant  fees  he 
obtains.  For  these  consist  in  thy  actual  suffering 
itself,  the  coin  of  unsightly  disease  and  untimely 
death,  the  desolation  of  thy  cherished  cities  and 
fields.  O  star-gazing  and  phantom-hugging  world, 
notwithstanding  all  thy  free  speech  and  boasted 
emancipation  from  the  authority  of  kings,  thou  art 
little  better  than  the  nation  of  frogs  that  elected 
a  stork  to  be  its  monarch.  Behold  thy  Vices. 
These  are  thy  rulers,  and  what  tax  bills  theirs ! 


V. 

A   FAVORED   ONE. 

gentleman  whom  Malcolm  saved  proved  to 
-i-  be  Mr.  Crisp,  who,  when  he  was  himself  again, 
said  to  Malcolm,  "  You  have  saved  my  life,  young 
man,  and  I  must  acknowledge  the  service." 

And  Malcolm  replied,  "  I  am  used  to  the  sea,  sir, 
and  must  do  just  so,  or  become  worse  than  useless. 
I  am  part  of  my  ship,  and,  like  a  rope  or  a  mast, 
must  endure  till  I  give  way.  You  owe  me  nothing." 

"  Do  you  call  my  life  nothing  ? "  and  the  deacon 
cast  a  crushing  look  on  some  young  men  who  had 
been  saved,  and  were  now  playing  poker.  "  Believe 
me,  I  wish  to  help  you.  Here,  take  this.  I  know 
by  your  face  that  you  will  not  waste  it ;  and  it  is  no 
loss  to  me." 

"  No,  thank  you,  sir,  I'd  rather  not  ; "  and  he 
blushed. 

"What,  so  poor,  and  refuse  an  honest  thousand?" 

"  I  am  not  ungrateful,  sir.  It  is  true  that  I  am 
poor  ;  yet  I  am  better  off  than  you  think.  All  men 
have  served  me,  and  must  I  receive  an  extra  fee  for 
doing  for  them  what  I  could  not  avoid  ?  No,  sir, 
keep  your  money." 

"  Well,  I  declare,  if  this  is  not  astonishing ! " 
thought  Mr.  Crisp.  "  He  is  out  at  the  elbows,  and 
tar  enough  on  his  jacket  to  paint  an  anchor.  It 

(29) 


30  MALCOLM  LAW  SON. 

beats  all.  But  I  will  not  hurt  his  feelings  again." 
And  he  withdrew  his  offer,  saying,  "  So,  my  young 
philosopher,  I  have  been  one  of  your  serving  men, 
have  I  ?  Well,  that  is  just  what  I  have  called  my 
self  time  and  again.  But  you  are  the  first  to  take 
me  at  my  word,  and  to  treat  me  as  the  prince  treats 
the  lackey  that  brings  the  wrong  wine.  But,  since 
I  owe  you  my  life,  I  can  well  afford  to  be  your 
humble  servant  now.  So,  what  can  I  do  for  you  ? " 

"  Well,  sir,  the  boats  will  soon  be  laid  up  for  the 
winter,  and  I  will  be  out  of  work.  Could  you  get  me 
a  job  ashore?  I  am  not  particular,  —  anything,  a 
chance  to  teach  a  school,  perhaps." 

"  But  are  you  equal  to  that  ?  " 

"  I  think  I  am." 

"  I  do  not  doubt  it,"  said  Mr.  Crisp,  assured  by  his 
look  of  pride.  "  You  will  have  it,  or,  what  is  better, 
I  am  in  want  of  a  clerk,  and  if  you  choose  you  can 
come  in  on  your  own  terms." 

"  Thank  you,  thank  you,  sir.  I  will  do  my  best  to 
justify  your  confidence." 

"Indeed,"  said  the  old  merchant,  "you  talk  like 
an  old  book-keeper  already.  Come  home  with  me, 
and  I  will  see  that  you  are  duly  settled.  But  to  be 
frank,  Mr.  Lawson,  he  who  refuses  an  honest  thou 
sand  is  not  likely  to  prove  particularly  sharp.  Ah, 
good  evening,  sir,  there's  the  dinner-bell.  However, 
I  like  him,"  he  muttered  as  the  lad  withdrew,  "  and 
if  there  is  anything  in  him,  he  will  have  a  chance  to 
show  it.  Halloo,  Captain  Seabreeze  (this  was  the 
master  of  the  lost  ship),  do  you  know  that  young 
fellow  there  just  moving  off?  " 


MALCOLM  LAWSON.  ^ 

"  Yes,  sir,  one  of  my  best  men,  sir  ;  a  fine  lad,  sir, 
a  very  fine  lad,  sir  ;  "  and  Captain  Seabreeze  bent 
before  the  rich  man  to  whom  he  was  indebted. 

"  How  long  has  he  been  with  you,  Seabreeze  ? " 

"  Second  season,  sir  :  always  on  hand  ;  never 
missed  a  trip,  sir  ;  works  like  the  Devil,  sir." 

"  Captain  Seabreeze,  I  beg  you  to  remember  my 
dislike  to  profaneness  ;"  and  Mr.  Crisp  turned  his 
back  on  the  unfortunate  skipper,  who  cried  out  to 
Malcolm,  as  soon  as  he  saw  him,  "  I  say,  lad,  look 
out  for  number  one.  The  old  chap's  taken  a  notion 
to  you, — a  notion,  sir.  Only  get  religion,  and  your 
fortune  is  made.  Oh,  he  is  worth  "  —  and  Seabreeze 
paused  till  his  imagination  gathered  strength  to  re 
lieve  itself,  when  he  said,  "  blocks  piled  upon  blocks, 
and  no  end  to  scrip,  sir." 

"  Really,  I  think  I  will  go  home  with  him." 

"  Of  course,  and  take  my  advice.  A  religious  old 
chap,  sir,  a  very  religious  old  chap,  sir  ;  plenty  of 
tracts,  sir  ;  take  them  to  heart,  —  set  sail  for  glory." 

"  Thank  you,  Captain,  I  had  quite  forgotten  that 
there  was  such  a  thing  as  religion." 

"You  shan't  forget  it  again,  sir.  Pitch  into  the 
tracts,  sir,  head  foremost.  Oyster  supper  of  them, 
lapid  change  of  heart,  sir  ;  Redeemer  ready,  and 
tug  to  golden  gate,  sir  ;  spirit's  steam,  sir." 

"  But  why  not  try  it  yourself,  Captain  ?  " 

"  Not  in  me,  sir.  Tried  hard,  but  could  not  do  it. 
A  born  devil,  sir,  so  must  go  below,  sir,  must  go 
below  ; "  and  exit  Captain  Seabreeze,  an  example 
of  profane  resignation,  while  Malcolm  went  to  the 
grand  abode  of  one  of  the  elect. 


32  MALCOLM  LAU'SOX. 

Malcolm  was  overjoyed  with  his  good  luck,  and 
went  to  work  with  a  will  to  make  himself  worthy  of 
it.  But,  alas  !  to  his  infinite  sorrow,  he  soon  discov 
ered  that  he  was  no  better  adapted  to  trade  now 
than  he  had  been  seven  years  ago,  when  he  was 
the  employe  of  the  friend,  who  did  not  esteem  highly 
"  they  wild  Highland  sangs  of  his,"  and  could  not  see 
the  fun  of  a  tombstone  ride. 

He  evidently  lacked  that  stern,  hard-fisted,  inde 
fatigable,  though  often  smiling,  shrewdness,  or,  if 
you  like  the  term  better,  the  genuine  Saxon  or 
Scandinavian  aptitude  for  money-making,  which  is 
so  common  in  New  Humbleton,  and  to  which  so 
much  of  its  prosperity  is  owing,  as  well  as  so  much 
of  its  blindness  to  the  beauty  of  goodness,  and  this 
fault  in  Deacon  Crisp's  eyes  was  next  to  theological 
infidelity  itself.  But  gratitude  influenced  the  dea 
con  in  his  favor,  and  Malcolm  continued  to  stay  in 
his  store,  notwithstanding  the  sneering  remarks  a 
want  of  smartness  induced  his  brethren  of  the  quill 
to  make  at  his  expense. 

He  was  discouraged,  and,  had  he  not  possessed 
a  friend  at  court,  he  would  have  been  quite  discon 
solate,  and  probably  returned  to  harder,  yet  perhaps 
more  congenial,  labor. 

This  friend  the  reader  probably  suspects,  was  no 
other  than  the  fair  Jennie  herself,  the  heiress  of 
the  palatial  residence,  and  the  lumber  untold,  &c. 
Not  only  the  romance  which  attended  his  introduc 
tion  to  her  as  the  saviour  of  her  father's  life,  but 
the  gratitude  with  which  he  inspired  her,  told  pow 
erfully  in  his  favor.  In  all  other  respects,  save  in 


MALCOLM  LAWSON. 


33 


social  position,  he  was  not  unworthy  of  her,  being, 
all  things  considered,  a  young  man  of  pleasing  exte 
rior,  and  the  possessor  of  fine  ideas. 

From  the  first  hour  of  her  acquaintance  with  him 
she  had  liked  him,  and  as  he  resided,  the  honored 
guest  of  her  father,  under  the  same  roof,  her  liking 
rapidly  ripened  into  a  deeper  sentiment. 

Malcolm  was  wiser  than  she.  He  realized  how 
foolish  it  was  for  him  to  aspire  to  the  daughter  of  a 
millionaire,  and  did  his  best  to  withdraw  from  the 
dazzlement. 

This  conduct  of  his  only  increased  the  love  of  the 
fair  Jennie,  to  whom  such  a  proceeding  on  the  part 
of  one  of  her  admirers  had  all  the  charm  of  nov 
elty.  Recognizing  his  superiority  to  others,  and 
divining  that  his  coldness  was  only  assumed,  she 
could  not  prevent  him  from  seeing  her  affection. 
The  young  man,  almost  without  being  conscious 
of  it,  had  fallen  in  love  with  her.  How  could  he 
help  it  ?  As  it  were,  the  gates  of  a  paradise  un 
expectedly  opened  unto  him,  and  a  fair  Eve  was 
there  to  receive  him.  He  confessed  his  love. 

But  the  particular  parent,  —  "ay,  there's  the  rub," 
—  what  was  he  to  say  to  this  climax  ?  O  Brother 
Crisp,  Brother  Crisp !  what  availeth  thy  Continental 
Miracle  Protection  Society  in  a  case  of  this  kind  ? 
There  is  a  mouse  in  thy  cupboard. 

That  venerable  personage,  when  he  heard  of  the 
above,  for  he  had  ears,  was  wroth,  and  performed 
all  the  antics  which  the  most  romantic  could  de 
mand  from  a  deacon  under  these  circumstances.  He 
3 


34 


MALCOLM  LAW  SON. 


stormed  and  thundered,  grew  frantic,  and,  forgetting 
the  Decalogue,  swore.  In  the  first  fit  of  his  indig 
nation  he  forgot  his  indebtedness  to  the  youth,  and, 
yielding  to  the  impulse  of  the  moment,  refused  to 
see  him  again.  Then  turning  to  his  daughter,  who 
had  come  with  tearful  eyes  to  deprecate  his  wrath, 
he  would  have  given  her  a  severe  reprimand,  had 
she  not,  overcome  by  the  intensity  of  her  grief, 
fainted  away.  However,  as  the  young  lady,  not 
withstanding  the  injudicious  treatment  of  the  per 
turbed  household,  soon  revived,  his  anger  returned, 
and  he  scolded  her  well.  But  the  little  fairy,  who 
now  began  to  realize  her  power,  was  undismayed  by 
his  reproaches,  and  silently  persisted  in  giving  Mal 
colm  the  first  place  in  her  regard.  To  vanquish  the 
prejudices  of  her  father  she  now  collected  her  sink 
ing  energies,  and  with  all  the  unconscious  art  of  her 
sex  besieged  the  heart  which  Mammon  had  fortified 
so  strongly.  Therefore  as  days  flew  by,  the  deacon 
had  reason  to  think  that  he  had  been  a  little  too 
precipitate  in  his  dismissal  of  her  lover.  His  ob 
servant  child  was  not  slow  to  perceive  her  advan 
tage,  arid,  profiting  by  several  favorable  opportuni 
ties,  so  represented  the  facts  of  the  case  that  he 
changed  his  mind,  and  under  certain  conditions 
finally  consented  to  receive  Malcolm  as  his  des 
tined  son-in-law. 


VI. 

A   GOOD   IDEA. 

'THHE  deacon,  having  made  up  his  mind  to  in- 
-A-  dulge  his  daughter,  wondered  what  he  should 
do  with  Malcolm.  "  Bless  me,"  said  he  to  himself, 
"  what  shall  I  do  with  the  young  man  ?  What  a  pity 
it  is  that  he  has  no  business  capacity  !  Confound  it, 
I  wish  I  had  never  brought  him  here.  D — n  the 
rascal  (God  forgive  me  the  oath) !  Fool  that  I  was 
not  to  notice  it  before.  I  am  not  only  obliged  to 
give  him  the  girl,  the  pride  of  my  life,  but  one  hun 
dred  thousand  dollars  to  keep  her  alive."  Just  at 
this  moment,  as  he  pulled  out  his  handkerchief  to 
wipe  away  the  tears  the  idea  of  such  a  sacrifice 
brought  to  his  eyes,  a  packet  of  delicate  little  tracts 
fell  out  upon  the  floor  and  fluttered  about  the 
room.  He  stooped  to  pick  them  up,  and  his  eye 
falling  upon  these  words,  "  Let  him  be  equipped  in 
the  armor  of  the  Lord,  and  sent  out  to  fight  the 
good  fight,"  he  muttered  in  a  reflective  manner, 
"  Ah  !  he  is  not  a  bad  youth  after  all."  Then, 
remembering  how  studious  he  had  been,  and  how 
attentive  to  his  pious  exhortations,  he  came  to  the 
conclusion,  as  his  eye  again  fell  upon  the  text  afore 
said,  that  he  might  not  make  a  bad  minister,  and 
perhaps  an  honorable  member  of  the  Continental 

(35) 


36  MALCOLM  LAWSON. 

Miracle  Protection  Association.  So  he  said,  "Upon 
my  word,  it  is  an  excellent  idea,  a  divine  behest. 
'Let  us  equip  him  in  the  armor  of  the  Lord';" 
and  the  remainder  of  the  text  rolled  unctuously 
forth  from  his  lips.  "  I  will  make  a  minister  of 
him,  and  as  such  he  will,  at  least,  be  quite 
acceptable  to  my  friends  in  the  faith.  To  be 
sure,  for  a  girl  in  Jennie's  position  it  is  a  terrible 
come-down.  But  God  is  good,  and  his  ways  are 
not  our  ways ;  who  knows  but  that  he  has  sent 
him  to  me  for  some  special  purpose  ?  The  lad  is 
not  without  character,  and  his  originality  is  not  hos 
tile  to  the  Word.  I  would  not  be  at  all  surprised, 
if  he  were  only  subjected  to  proper  influences, 
he  turned  out  well,  and  ranked  high  in  the  denom 
ination." 

Thu^  it  seems  that  the  deacon  was  not  destitute 
of  common  sense.  He  had  enough  to  see,  that, 
notwithstanding  the  boy's  deplorable  want  of  busi 
ness  talent,  he  was  far  from  being  stupid  in  other 
respects,  and  was  one  of  the  steadiest  of  young 
men  ;  at  all  events,  he  was  in  his  opinion  good 
enough  for  the  ministry,  as  he  believed  that  faith 
fulness,  and  not  so  much  great  talent,  was  the  pre 
requisite  for  that  profession.  Not  only  the  stucli- 
ousness  and  the  steadiness  of  Malcolm  pleased  him, 
but  he  liked  him  for  his  regular  attendance  upon 
divine  service,  and  for  the  attention  with  which 
he  had  listened  to  him  when  he  expounded  the 
"  Word "  to  his  own  household,  which  he  did  a 
little  oftener  than  was  agreeable  to  it. 

The  fact  was,  Malcolm,  notwithstanding  his  origi- 


MALCOLM  LAWSON. 


37 


nality,  was  so  much  occupied  attending  to  his  own 
improvement,  that  he  had  but  little  time  to  deplore 
the  short-comings  of  others.  He  saw  enough  in  the 
Calvinistic  system  of  religion  to  attract  his  respect, 
if  not  to  awaken  enthusiasm  for  it.  His  studies 
and  duties,  as  a  laborer  in  the  vineyard  of  man,  so 
absorbed  him  that  he  was  gradually  losing  the  ex 
acting  God  of  his  childhood.  In  this  respect,  how 
ever,  like  all  healthy  minds,  he  was  making  that 
transition  of  Being  which  has  been  compared  to 
the  molting  process,  without  the  gnawing  self- 
consciousness  so  often  accompanying  it.  Yet  he 
was  still  under  the  influence  of  that  kind  of  super 
stition  which,  although  often  found  in  Christian 
churches,  is  free  from  bigotry  or  fear.  His  vision 
had  not  yet  reached  the  traditionary  errors  which 
impede  the  progress  of  true  religion,  and  hinder  the 
free  exercise  of  Reason  among  the  people.  There 
fore,  since  he  found  a  certain  nourishment  in  the 
pastures  of  Presbyterianism,  it  was  as  natural  for 
him  to  read  the  Bible  and  attend  church  as  to  wear 
a  fashionable  hat  and  take  it  off  to  the  family  min 
ister.  It  had  not  yet  occurred  to  him  that  he  was 
only  a  Christian,  and  that  if  he  intended  to  devote 
himself  to  the  improvement  of  his  race,  it  might  be 
necessary  to  become  a  Liberal. 

In  regard  to  his  present  creed,  he  puts  us  in  mind 
of  a  child  still  so  charmed  with  its  musical  toy,  that 
it  remains  without  curiosity  as  to  the  source  of  the 
pleasant  sounds.  But  the  period  of  inquiry  had  yet 
to  come,  and  the  creed  be  sacrificed.  Yet  what  of 
that  ?  Men  must  put  away  childish  things,  even 


3  8  MALCOLM  LAW  SON. 

the  nursery  literature  which  once  afforded  them,  or 
still  may  supply,  food  for  wonderment.  It  is  strange 
that  the  madness  of  which  Don  Quixote  is  the  well- 
known  type,  should  repeat  itself  with  such  regular 
ity  from  generation  to  generation.  In  vain  we  re 
fute,  burn,  annihilate  the  legends  which  give  rise  to  it. 
The  consequences  of  the  perusal  remain,  and,  blend 
ing  with  the  inherent  weaknesses  of  humanity,  ex 
cite  the  astonishment,  ridicule,  or  terror  of  ordinary 
minds.  Behold  the  Knights  of  the  Hour,  each  bear 
ing  on  his  banner  (newspaper)  the  ism  of  his  adora 
tion,  the  badge  of  his  order,  and  the  emblem  of  his 
cause  ;  each  attacking  the  other,  or  vainly  strug 
gling  against  the  wind  mills  of  modern  thought,  or 
galloping  full  tilt,  with  unexpected  velocity,  upon 
flocks  of  inoffensive  sheep. 

Poor  Malcolm  read  his  Revelations,  and,  like 
nearly  all  young  men  of  the  present  day,  was  not 
sure  whether  he  believed  them  or  not.  In  his  indi 
vidual  capacity,  he  had  to  yet  undergo  the  Protes 
tant  Reformation,  but  perhaps  without  the  experi 
ence  of  much  benefit. 

"  I  say,  sir,"  asked  a  smart  boy  in  a  bookseller's 
store,  "  have  ye  got  any  books  for  boys  that  haven't 
got  any  religion  in  them  ? " 


VII. 

WHAT  JENNIE  SAID  TO  IT,  NAMELY,  THE 
GOOD  IDEA,  AND  HOW  MALCOLM  GOT 
THE  BENEFIT  OF  IT  AND  WAS  DULY 
INSTALLED  AS  THE  FAVORED  INDIVID 
UAL. 

JENNIE  was  delighted  with  this  opportune  con 
clusion  of  her  parent,  namely,  to  equip  her  lover 
in  the  armor  of  the  Lord,  and  send  him  out  to  fight 
the  good  fight  with  —  whatever  you  please  to  add, 
dearly  beloved  readers.  After  a  fitting  expression 
of  her  gratitude  and  joy,  she  said  that  she  had 
always  liked  ministers,  particularly  those  of  the 
new  school ;  and  Malcolm,  with  his  fine  mind  and 
spiritual  expression,  would  make  a  good  one.  Then 
she  said,  "And  he  will  have  a  splendid  field  for  the 
exercise  of  his  talents.  How  good  of  you,  dear, 
dear  papa,  to  think  of  this !  An  angel  from  Heaven 
must  have  inspired  you."  And  she  sang,  "  Happy 
day,  happy  day,"  but  in  so  indecorus  a  tone  that 
the  deacon  rebuked  her,  and  told  her  that,  if  she 
intended  to  marry  a  minister,  she  must  become 
more  sedate  in  her  manners.  She  straightway 
vowed  repentance,  and  flew  up  stairs  on  the  wings 
of  excitement,  to  write  and  tell  Malcolm  all  about  it. 
Malcolm,  meanwhile,  had  been  in  a  troubled  state 

(39) 


40  MALCOLM  LAW  SON. 

of  mind.      He  felt  keenly  the  outrageous  conduct 
of  the  deacon. 

As  soon  as  he  left  the  house  he  returned  to  the 
office,  where  he  wrote  to  both  father  and  daughter, 
thanking  the  former  for  his  past  kindness,  and  bid 
ding  the  other  an  affectionate  farewell  till  the  ad 
vent  of  a  brighter  day.  He  then  went  home  to 
new  lodgings  in  a  still  more  melancholy  mood. 
This  expulsion  from  his  recent  Eden,  and  from 
the  presence  of  his  Eve,  was  worse  than  the  one 
he  had  already  experienced  in  childhood.  He  was 
disconsolate,  and  for  a  time  was  unable  to  do  any 
thing  but  dwell  upon  the  adverse  occurrence.  At 
last  he  began  to  raise  his  drooping  head,  and  look 
about  him,  as  his  purse,  in  unconscious  sympathy 
with  his  misfortune,  had  gone  into  a  decline.  He 
tried  the  lakes  again,  and  found  the  best  cure  for 
his  unhappiness  in  hard  work. 

On  his  return  from  his  first  trip  he  found  a  letter 
waiting  for  him,  asking  him  to  call  at  Mr.  Crisp's 
office,  as  that  gentleman  had  something  important 
to  communicate. 

He  went.  Mr.  Crisp,  who  was  amiability  itself, 
received  him  in  the  kindest  manner.  "  My  dear 
boy,"  he  began,  looking  up  from  his  cash-book,  and 
sticking  his  pen  behind  his  ear,  "  I  confess  I  was  a 
little  hasty.  For  the  moment  the  Evil  One  got  the 
upper  hand  of  me,  and  I  treated  you  badly.  But 
(here  he  looked  resolute)  I  shall  make  amends. 
You  will  forget  it  when  I  inform  you  of  what  I,  with 


MALCOLM  LAW  SON.  4! 

God's  help  intend  to  do  for  you.  To  be  candid,  I 
was  disappointed  that  Jennie  should  fix  her  choice 
upon  you,  for  I  had  other  views  for  her.  Young 
Fitzmouse,  of  Grasp,  Fitsmouse,  Catch,  &  Co.,  had 
proposed  for  her,  and  being  the  son  of  a  dear  friend 
and  personally  very  eligible,  I  had  made  up  my 
mind  in  his  favor.  But  it  seems  that  Providence 
has  interposed,  and  I  will  not  rebel  against  his  will, 
or,  indeed,  against  my  own  good  sense  ;  for,  after 
all,  your  character  is  of  the  best ;  and  I  remember 
now  what  I  am  sorry  to  have  forgotten  once,  namely, 
that  I  owe  you  my  life." 

"  Oh,  Mr.  Crisp,  do  not  remind  me  of  that." 

"  You  are  generous,  Malcolm,  and  I  am  con 
strained  to  be  even  with  you.  The  barriers  of  con 
ventionalism  shall  tumble,  and  you  shall  have  my 
child,  and  in  due  time  all  that  I  possess."  And  the 
deacon  leaned  back  in  his  chair,  and  looked  up  to 
see  the  effect  of  his  eloquence. 

Malcolm  was  speechless  for  a  moment,  and  then, 
rising,  he  took  Mr.  Crisp's  hand,  and  said,  "  You  be 
wilder  me,  sir.  Your  kindness  fills  me  so  that  I  feel 
as  if  I  could  move  heaven  and  earth  to  repay  it." 

"  Gently,  gently,  my  son,"  and  the  deacon  smiled. 
"  I  am  less  ambitious  than  you,  and  do  not  look  for 
so  vast  a  show  of  gratitude.  All  that  I  wish  in  re 
turn  is  a  docile  mind  and  a  willing  heart,  and  if  you 
could  only  take  my  advice,  and  be  a  little  more  of  a 
business  man,  I  would  be  quite  satisfied.  But  since 
that  is  out  of  the  question,  it  has  occurred  to  me 
that  you  might  make  an  excellent  preacher.  What 
do  you  say  to  the  ministry  for  a  profession  ? 


42 


MALCOLM  LAWSON. 


"  The  ministry  !  "  and  the  young  man  was  speech 
less  again. 

"  Yes,  sir,  the  ministry,"  was  the  pompous  reply, 
and  the  deacon  withdrew  a  thumb  from  the  arm-hole 
of  his  vest,  and  lifted  the  other  from  its  interrogative 
position  on  the  desk,  evidently  requiring  the  help  of 
both  hands  for  the  speech  he  was  about  to  make, — 
"  the  service  of  man  for  the  sake  of  God  ;  and  if  you 
will  but  dwell  for  a  moment  upon  all  that  he  has 
done  for  us,  it  will  sharpen  your  intelligence.  In 
finite  Self-sacrifice  demands  entire  unselfishness  on 
our  part ;  and  is  there  not  endless  labor  before  those 
who  rejoice  in  the  gift  of  Revelation  ?  And  if  the 
chief  end  of  man  is  to  glorify  God,  and  enjoy  him 
forever,  it  is  time  for  him  to  be  up  and  doing.  Thus, 
Malcolm,  I  open  the  door  of  a  great  future,  and  it 
remains  with  you,  now,  whether  you  will  buckle  on 
the  armor  of  righteousness.  I  need  hardly  say  that 
what  with  radicals,  spiritists,  and  all  manner  of  infi 
dels,  the  world  is  in  a  pretty  bad  way ;  hence  great 
need  of  faithful  officers." 

"  This  is  a  surprise,  Mr.  Crisp.  But  I  appreciate 
the  idea.  My  great  concern  is  that  I  am  not  wor 
thy  of  a  commission  in  your  army.  Heretofore,  I 
have  been  only  a  private,  and  hardly  know  the  word 
of  command.  Of  course  I  can  learn,  but  I  haven't 
even  thought  of  spiritual  strategy." 

"  Malcolm,  this  is  not  a  subject  for  levity,"  and 
the  deacon  colored. 

"  Pardon  me,  sir.  I  did  not  mean  to  speak  lightly 
or  disrespectfully.  But  I  am  not  pious  enough  to 
carry  Heavenly  Messages  and  take  orders  that  I 


MALCOLM  LAIVSON. 


•43 


cannot  faithfully  fulfill ;  Dr.  Pluffle  says  I  talk  like  a 
heathen,  and  it  may  be  true.  Nor  can  I  tell  what 
ails  me  ;  but  in  regard  to  theology  I  feel  wofully 
numb.  However,  accept  my  thanks  for  the  interest 
you  take  in  me." 

"  Well,  Malcolm,  I  declare  you  are  the  most  sin 
gular  person  I  ever  saw !  What  is  there  in  this 
wide  world  of  ours  to  hinder  you  from  accepting  the 
Revealed  Word,  and  devoting  yourself  to  the  re 
demption  of  Humanity?" 

"  I  do  not  know,  unless  it  is  unfitness  for  the  task. 
I  see  that  it  is  no  small  affair ;  yet  I  gladly  enter 
tain  the  project ;  and,  indeed,  as  I  see  into  the  fu 
ture,  it  appears  more  feasible.  Captain  Seabreeze 
said  that  I  was  a  born  preacher,  and  urged  me  to 
get  religion  by  all  means." 

"  I  did  not  know,"  said  the  deacon,  sharply,  "  that 
he  was  particularly  religious." 

"  Not  he !  But  he  is  fully  alive  to  the  advantages 
of  the  Faith,  even  while  he  deplores  his  innate 
deviltry." 

"  To  save  my  life,  boy,  I  cannot  tell  whether  your 
simplicity  is  real  or  feigned.  But  I  must  think  that 
you,  who  come  of  sound  Presbyterian  stock,  would 
gladly  enter  upon  the  noblest  vocation  of  all.  There 
is  not  a  young  Christian  in  the  country  who  would 
not  go  into  ecstasies  at  an  offer  like  this." 

"  Do  not  misunderstand  me,  sir.  You  know  that 
it  is  my  habit  to  speak  just  as  I  feel ;  and  it  hurts 
me  not  to.  The  prospect  you  unfold  is  dazzling,  and 
my  only  misgiving  is  that  I  am  not  equal  to  the  task. 
It  is  true  that  I  have  always  revered  genuine  Chris- 


44 


MALCOLM  LAWSON. 


tians,  but  I  never  liked  to  call  myself  one,  lest  I 
should  not  be  quite  up  to  the  mark.  Still,  since 
your  desire  concurs  with  my  ambition,  I  will  go  to 
college  and  exert  myself  to  learn  the  Truth." 

"That's  the  proper  spirit,  my  son  ;  that's  the 
proper  spirit.  You  see  the  propriety  of  adopting 
some  profession  ;  and  what  more  congenial  to  the 
soul  than  the  acquisition  of  Truth  ? " 

Here  the  deacon  was  interrupted  by  the  unex 
pected  entrance  of  Miss  Crisp,  who  ran  to  meet  her 
lover ;  and,  taking  him  by  both  hands,  she  said,  — 

"  O,  Malcolm  !  you  are  come  back  at  last,  and  1 
am  so  glad !  And  this  splendid  plan  of  papa's  ! 
You  are  to  be  a  minister,  — just  think,  —  my  minis 
ter  !  And  we  will  all  be  so  happy  again.  Come 
home  with  me  now,  do  ;  I  have  so  much  to  tell 
you."  And  thus  urgent,  quite  careless  of  appear 
ances  and  the  gaze  of  envious  clerks,  the  young 
princess  led  Malcolm  out  of  her  father's  private 
office,  through  the  palatial  store  into  the  buzzing 
street  ("  that  centipede  in  harness,"  as  Mr.  Sweep 
has  it). 

The  deacon  glanced  after  them  with  a  deep  sigh, 
but  in  a  moment  he  smiled  again,  for  had  he  not  — 
even  while  he  put  an  indifferent  Calvinist  in  a  fair 
way  to  obtain  a  more  living  faith,  and  thus  vindicate 
his  Lord  —  manifested  enthusiasm  in  the  service  of 
his  Maker,  and,  at  the  same  time,  got  rid  of  a  seri 
ous  domestic  botheration  ? 

Deacon  Crisp  was  a  rare  compound  of  amiability, 
shrewdness,  genuine  piety,  rapacity,  and  supersti 
tion,  and,  as  in  all  men,  with  few  exceptions,  it  de- 


MALCOLM  LAW  SON. 


45 


pended  on  circumstances  whether  vice  or  virtue  had 
the  upper  hand.  Malcolm  and  he  were  related,  else 
they  would  not  have  met.  But  small  as  Mr.  Crisp 
is,  faithful  adherence  to  the  Letter  makes  him  large 
enough  to  contain  the  world,  —  a  tight  fit  truly,  and 
the  reader  will  allow  for  the  straining. 

"An  exact  spiritual  balance,  and  the  just  regula 
tion  of  events,"  says  Prof.  Knitting  Needle,  "  are 
maintained  by  obedience  to  two  laws  :  the  law  of 
objective  self-preservation,  which  enjoins  strict  at 
tention  to  business  and  to  the  practical  in  general ; 
and  the  law  of  subjective  integrity,  which  enjoins 
devotion  to  the  ideal,  and  reasonable  self-sacrifice 
for  ihe  same.  According  to  the  first  law,  Jesus, 
Socrates,  and  countless  martyrs  fell,  —  and  legiti 
mately  so,  all  things  considered  ;  for  their  ideas, 
consistently  put  in  practice,  would  have  resulted  in 
the  destruction  of  the  letter  of  the  law,  and,  conse 
quently,  of  the  means  of  government,  to  the  dete 
rioration  of  the  body  politic.  Whereas,  had  the 
martyrs  reasonably  conformed  to  the  existing  preju 
dices  and  established  institutions,  and  thus  given 
the  objective  its  due  weight,  a  proper  balance  might 
have  been  instituted  to  the  realization  of  happiness 
for  all." 

But  Malcolm  didn't  know  this,  and  he  could  not 
but  think  it  strange  that,  instead  of  giving  up  all  for 
Jesus'  sake,  he  was  forced  to  take  all  and  follow  him. 
Even  the  best  of  circumstances  will  conspire  against 
one.  The  deacon  gave  Malcolm  to  understand  that 
he  desired  a  sound  Christian  to  marry  his  daughter, 


VIII. 

A   BLACK   SPOT. 

SUCH,  then,  were  the  circumstances  that,  led  to 
the  engagement  of  the  young  people  whom  we 
have  already  described  in  conversation  with  one 
another  in  the  luxurious  parlor  of  the  deacon.  So 
ciety,  when  informed  of  it,  being  as  oracular  as  ever, 
stared  in  amazement,  and  said,  "  Who  would  have 
thought  it  ?  What  an  infatuation  !  Both  father  and 
daughter  are  mad."  But  Mr.  Crisp  was  fond  of  hav 
ing  his  own  way,  and  Malcolm  and  Jennie  were  too 
much  in  love  to  care  what  was  said  about  them. 

It  is  not  necessary  for  us  to  describe  all  that 
passed  in  the  magnificent  domicile,  and  the  good 
city  of  Bragville  up  to  the  day  of  Malcolm's  depar 
ture  for  the  Orient  to  join  the  academy  of  divin 
ity  there.  The  fortnight  that  preceded  it  was  one 
prolonged  dream  of  delight,  —  and  how  could  it  be 
otherwise  ?  Both  were  in  the  Eden  of  first  love,  as 
we  have  already  intimated.  The  youth  saw  the  ideal 
for  which  he  had  toiled  and  striven  upon  the  eve  of 
realization,  and  the  maiden  was  happy  in  the  pos 
session  of  a  lover,  who  not  only  answered  her  ro 
mantic  tastes,  but  loved  her  for  the  good  that  was 
in  her. 

But  there  was  just  one  black  spot  on  their  pres- 

(46) 


MALCOLM  LAWSON.  47 

ent  horizon,  and  they  felt  its  presence,  although 
they  could  not  be  said  to  see  it. 

The  Rev.  Jehosaphat  Pluffle,  D.D.,  was  the  favored 
pastor  and  the  trusted  friend  of  Mr.  Crisp,  and  the 
treasurer  of  the  Continental  Miracle  Protection  As 
sociation.  As  this  gentleman  was  still  single,  he 
had  for  some  time  past  been  looking  upon  Miss 
Jane  with  admiring  eyes,  but,  as  she  had  never 
given  him  a  word  of  encouragement,  he  had  studi 
ously  withheld  from  her  ear  the  avowal  of  the  flame 
that  consumed  him.  He  had  hoped  that  she  might 
experience  a  "  change  of  heart,"  and  therefore  had 
not  felt  disappointed  until  "that young  Darklyn  vag 
abond,"  as  he  was  pleased  to  term  her  lover,  came 
along  and  knocked  his  hopes  on  the  head.  Then 
he  really  did  feel  the  need  of  all  his  faith  to  bear 
him  up  in  his  troubles,  and,  thanks  either  to  that 
or  a  good  constitution,  slowly  recovered.  His  hopes 
revived  as,  looking  over  the  domain  of  the  future,  he 
thought  he  saw  some  chances  in  his  favor. 

Jehosaphat  Pluffle  was  neither  more  nor  less  than 
an  ordinary  hypocrite.  He  was  one  of  those  big, 
pluffy,  shambling  dignitaries  of  the  Church,  with  a 
lisp,  who  are  as  strong  in  the  faith  and  the  spirit  as 
they  are  weak  in  the  flesh  and  principle.  But  what 
did  mere  lack  of  physical  beauty  matter  to  one  of 
his  faith  and  denomination,  to  one  of  his  social  posi 
tion  and  excessive  unctuosity?  Evidently  speaking 
from  his  past  experience,  he  said  to  himself,  as  he 
compared  himself  to  the  fair  Jennie,  "  I  shall  do  my 
best  to  extinguish  her  carnal  vision.  I  shall  so 
illuminate  my  humble  person  with  the  magic  name 


48  MALCOLM  LAWSON. 

of  the  Lord  that  I  shall  be  as  one  transfigured  in 
her  sight.  Verily,  the  name  availeth  much  with  the 
father  already.  I  cannot  but  believe  that  I  am  ac 
ceptable  to  him.  Who  knows  what  may  happen  to 
the  young  fellow  ?  I  doubt  much  if  he  be  a 
worthy  vessel  to  hold  the  holy  oil.  I  shall  rely 
upon  the  Lord,  and  bide  my  time." 

Therefore  Jehosaphat  bided  his  time,  and  in  the 
interim  neglected  no  opportunity  of  disparaging  the 
youth  to  his  destined  father-in-law.  "  My  good 
brother  in  the  Lord,"  he  said  to  him,  shortly  after 
he  heard  of  the  engagement,  "  I  fear  you  have  been 
a  little  hasty  in  this  matter.  Have  you  thoroughly 
satisfied  yourself  about  the  antecedents  of  Lawson  ? 
You  would  invest  him  in  the  sacred  cloth,  and  make 
an  evangelist  of  him  !  You  certainly  do  fill  me  with 
surprise." 

"  Why  not  ? "  said  the  deacon.  "  I  know  him  to 
be  a  most  exemplary  lad.  He  saved  my  life,  as  you 
well  know ;  and  there  is  Jennie,  who  loves  him  to 
distraction.  He  is  sure  to  excel  in  the  ministry.  I 
never  saw  anything  out  of  the  way  in  the  boy,  save 
perhaps  a  little  willful  humor.  It  never  occurred  to 
me  to  concern  myself  about  his  antecedents." 

"  The  Evil  One,"  lisped  Dr.  Pluffle,  with  increased 
unction  of  manner,  "  is  very  deceitful ;  the  best  of 
us  are  often  taken  by  surprise.  I  regret  to  say  — 
and,  verily,  were  I  not  moved  by  the  spirit  to  say 
what  I  now  say,  I  should  be  silent  —  that  your  pro 
tege  hath  appeared  to  me  to  be  a  little  bit  wayward 
Remember,  were  I  not  your  trusty  friend,  and  had 
I  not  your  welfare  at  heart,  I  should  not  take  the 


MALCOLM  LAWSON.  49 

liberty  of  mentioning  this  to  you.  You  will  hardly 
believe  me  when  I  tell  you  that  when  I  exhorted 
Mr.  Lawson  to  stand  up  with  the  rest  of  the  flock 
for  the  Lord,  he  only  smiled  in  reply,  —  yes,  Brother 
Crisp,  in  reply  to  my  earnest  exhortations  he  smiled 
vainly  and  most  unbecomingly.  His  affections  may 
not  be  so  firmly  placed  on  things  above  as  we 
both  might  desire."  Here  the  right  reverend  gen 
tleman  paused,  and  his  vision  rolled  serenely  down 
the  black  silk  covered  slope  of  his  bosom,  as  if  his 
affections  were  located  to  his  perfect  satisfaction. 

"  I  don't  know  about  that,"  said  the  deacon,  who 
had  more  common  sense  than  Dr.  Pluffle.  "  I 
thought  the  boy  was  religious  enough.  I  am  sorry 
you  don't  like  him.  But  he'll  improve.  Oratone 
Buzz,  Progressive  Bungle,  and  Hezekiah  Graves  will 
bring  him  out  all  right.  I  see  nothing  to  hinder 
him  from  becoming  one  of  our  foremost  miracle  pro 
tectors." 

"  It  grieveth  me  to  the  heart,  my  good  brother,  to 
dampen  thy  enthusiasm  ;  but  that  smile,  brother, 
that  smile.  It  haunts  my  memory  and  will  not 
away.  Verily,  there  is  much  in  his  favor,"  here  he 
could  not  suppress  a  groan  ;  "  I  do  trust  he  shall 
prove  worthy  of  thee  and  thine.  Good  morning, 
brother,  I  must  leave  thee  here ; "  and,  shaking 
hands,  the  gentlemen  parted,  the  one  to  condole 
with  a  sick  parishioner  who  was  about  to  die  in 
the  Lord,  and  the  other  to  return  to  his  cash-book. 

But  did  the  reverend  Pluffle  have  any  ground  at  all 
for  his  aspiration  to  the  hand  of  Miss  Crisp  ?  None  : 
excepted  the  simple  fact  that  she  was  superstitious 


SO  MALCOLM  LAWSON. 

enough  to  regard  clergymen  as  sacred  beings,  who 
were  much  more  intimately  connected  with  Divinity 
than  ordinary  mortals.  The  girl  really  believed  that 
she  had  a  soul,  and  was  quite  willing  to  do  all  she 
could  for  it  consistently  with  her  ordinary  mode  of 
life  and  with  her  fondness  for  a  good  time.  Therefore 
she  listened  with  at  least  a  semblance  of  patience  to 
the  stream  of  pious  words  which  PlufHe  poured  into 
her  ears  when  he  called  to  attend  to  her  spiritual 
wants,  or  seek  the  transfiguration  of  himself  in  her 
sight. 

As  Dr.  PlufHe  was  in  the  habit  of  calling  him 
self  a  miserable  sinner,  we  simply  take  the  liberty 
to  represent  him  as  such.  The  reader  will  sym 
pathize  with  our  readiness  to  take  him  at  his 
word. 

"  Confound  the  obstinacy  of  her  carnal  vision," 
growled  Pluffle  in  an  undertone,  as  that  quality  of 
the  young  lady  would  wander  from  the  contempla 
tion  of  her  pastor  to  the  prospect  of  her  alliance 
with  the  young  Darklyn  student,  and  dwelt  upon 
the  entertainments  with  which  she  intended  to  in 
augurate  the  happy  event. 

"  Do  you  like  parties,  Dr.  PlufHe  ? "  she  asked 
once,  interrupting  him  in  one  of  his  peculiar  refrains. 

"  To  what  kind  of  parties  do  you  refer,  my  dear 
child  ?  If  you  refer  to  the  conventicles  of  Fashion, 
I  should  say,  '  No,'  although  it  is  necessary  that  I 
should  attend  them  sometimes  and  warn  the  fold, 
that  is,  in  a  friendly  manner,  you  know,  against  in 
dulgence  in  perishable  pleasures,  and  remind  them 
of  the  duties  they  owe  to  the  Lamb.  A  serious 


MALCOLM  LAWSON.  51 

moment  in  the  midst  of  gaiety  does  not  come  amiss. 
But  the  parties  in  which  I  take  pleasure  are  the 
blissful  communions  and  conferences  of  the  saints. 
How  glad  I  would  be,  nay,  how  glad  the  Lord  would 
be,  and  what  rejoicing  there  would  be  round  the 
throne,  if  you,  sweet  sister,  would  give  up  your 
heart  to  the  benign  influences  of  the  Spirit,  and  be 
wholly  one  of  us." 

The  young  lady  shuddered  at  this  display  of  feel 
ing  on  the  part  of  the  Knight  of  the  Woeful  Figure  ; 
for  it  occurred  to  her  that  if  she  were  going  to  be 
the  wife  of  a  minister,  she  would  have  to  participate 
in  the  communion  of  saints,  and  in  all  sorts  of  sepul 
chral  things.  Her  only  comfort  was  the  thought 
that  Malcolm  was  too  lively  ever  to  become  so  spir 
itually  dingy  as  Dr.  Pluffle.  However,  feeling  that  she 
must,  as  a  minister's  wife,  become  a  little  more 
serious  in  her  deportment,  she  could  not  but  be  a 
little  conscience-stricken  at  the  thought  of  her  spir 
itual  deficiences. 

"  I  fear,"  she  replied  confidingly,  "  that  I  am 
awfully  wicked,  Dr.  Pluffle.  I  am  so  fond  of  my 
kind  of  parties  that  I  have  not  been  to  a  prayer- 
meeting  for  a  month." 

"  Alas  !  "  lisped  Dr.  Pluffle,  turning  up  the  whites 
of  his  eyes,  and  sighing  with  concentrated  piety,  "we 
are  all  very  wicked,  and  were  it  not  for  the  Blood 
where  would  we  be  ? "  The  last  part  of  this  sen 
tence  came  out  with  a  barely  perceptible  jerk,  and, 
after  darting  a  glance  at  Miss  Crisp,  the  eyes  re 
sumed  their  meek  expression,  and  again  shone  with 
calm  resignation. 


52  MALCOLM  LAW  SON. 

"  You  certainly  ought  to  bethink  yourself  in  this 
matter,  my  dear  sister.  Much  dependeth  upon  the 
active  participation  of  the  wife  in  the  evangelical 
duties  of  her  husband.  I  would  gladly  assist  you  in 
your  search  for  grace,  see,  in  fact,  attend  personally 
to  your  growth  therein,  that  you  might  fairly  flourish 
in  the  Lord,  and  bring  forth  good  fruit ; "  and  he 
smiled  a  benign  smile. 

"  Thank  you,  Dr.  Pluffle :  how  good  of  you  to  take 
this  interest  in  me.  I  will  accept  your  guidance, 
and  hope  I  shall  not  prove  an  unworthy  sheep. 
But  excuse  me  now."  She  had  heard  her  lover's 
ring,  and  was  now  hearing  him  ascend  the  stairs 
towards  the  library ;  and,  scarcely  waiting  for  a 
reply,  she  courtesied  to  Dr.  Pluffle  and  hastily 
withdrew. 

Jehosaphat  also  heard  the  ring,  and,  knowing 
well  who  came,  he  gnashed  his  teeth  as,  with 
forced,  composure,  he  turned  to  a  stereoscope  and 
appeared  to  be  intent  upon  its  wonders. 


IX. 


FACING  ALL  WAYS,  OR  THE  KNIGHT  OF 
THE  RAINBOW  CREED,  NUMBER  ONE,  OF 
ORIENTAL  FAME. 

WE  were  about  to  write  a  long  dissertation 
upon  preaching,  when  we  happened,  just  as 
we  laid  the  life  of  the  Apostle  Paul  on  the  table,  to 
cast  our  eye  on  one  of  the  printed  oracles  of  that 
goddess  of  world-wide  notoriety  known  as  Madam 
Demorest,  which  so  well  expressed  the  true  charac 
ter  of  that  function  of  some  Christian  ministers, 
that  we  think  it  a  sin  to  leave  it  without  due  recog 
nition.  Listen,  then,  O  votaries  of  all  divinities 
both  secular  and  religious  to  the  oracles.  We  only 
change  a  word  or  two,  to  make  the  sense  more  com 
plete  and  the  style  more  attractive. 

" '  Truth  unadorned  is  adorned  the  most,'  "  a  paradox,  now 
obsolete,  the  worth  and  truth  of  which  was  undoubtedly 
accepted  in  those  good  old  clays  when  nine  sheets,  of  ordinary 
size,  made  an  rt^-dress  for  the  most  particular  of  our  mater 
nal  ancestors,  with  a  remnant  left  for  'fixing  over.' 

"  The  clergymen  of  the  nineteenth  century  believe  that  a 
florid  style  and  other  rhetorical  ornaments,  though  not  indis 
pensable,  are  important  items  in  one's  sermons,  and  when  ap 
propriately  selected  (always  remembering  that  quality  and  not 
quantity  is  the  indication  of  a  refined  taste),  they  certainly  add 
to  the  grace  and  beauty  of  the  appearance,  be  the  subject  either 
a  fair  or  a  plain  one.  Just  as  a  picture  beautiful  and  valuable 

(S3) 


54  ORATONE  BUZZ. 

on  the  bare  canvas  when  placed  in  the  surrounding  of  a 
chaste  and  beautiful  frame,  so  these  dainty  rhetorical  orna 
ments,  in  all  their  exquisite  designs,  bring  to  the  sight  and 
mind  of  the  observer  a  sense  of  peculiar  fitness  when  taste 
fully  preached  by  fair  clergymen"  * 

O  mighty  spirit  of  Jesus  of  Nazareth !  why  art 
thou  not  here  to  see  the  adornment  of  thy  once 
simple  Truth  ?  What  has  become  of  the  humility 
with  which  thou  didst  inaugurate  the  crusade 
against  Hypocrisy  ?  Wouldst  thou  recognize  it  in 
the  rainbow  hues  of  the  current  theology  wherewith 
it  must  be  attired  ere  it  can  become  acceptable  to 
us  ?  Tell  us,  prithee,  whether  the  present  fashion  be 
a  token  of  the  fullness  of  the  soul,  the  flowering  of 
our  prosperity,  or,  like  the  rank  growth  of  a  corpse's 
hair,  the  product  of  decay. 

It  is  plain  that  the  girls  of  the  period  are  as 
divine  as  the  ministers.  By  contriving  to  alter  a 
word  now  and  then  we  could  turn  the  fashion  books 
into  religious  magazines.  Please  substitute  to  cor 
respond  the  following  words :  "  Beauty,"  "  corpulent," 
"ladies,"  "jewelry,"  "face,"  "worn,"  "ladies."  It  is 
not  hard  to  see  where  they  belong.  The  empire  of 
clothes  is  still  paramount ;  that  of  the  soul  is  barely 
begun.  Fashion  is  a  Pharaoh,  and  his  heart  grows 
daily  harder. 

After  those  sublimities  of  Fashion  it  is  hardly 
worth  our  while  to  tell  you  about  Oratone.  But  as 
we  have  a  story  to  relate  we  must  describe  his  rev- 

*  Madam  Demorest's  Bulletin  of  Ladies'  and  Children's 
Fashions,  Fall  and  Winter,  '72-'/3.  The  chapter  on  Jewelry 
P-S7- 


OR  ATONE  BUZZ. 


55 


erence  to  the  best  of  our  ability.  As  this  fair 
clergyman  represents  a  certain  class  of  orators, 
\ve  think  it  a  duty  to  draw  attention  to  the  good 
and  the  ill  that  is  in  him.  He  was  stout,  fat,  hand 
some,  and  not  yet  fifty  years  old.  Quite  frank  and 
open  in  his  manners,  and  characterized  by  a  car 
riage  in  which  pomposity  and  jauntiness  strug 
gled  for  the  mastery,  his  whole  appearance  beto 
kened  an  impulsively  generous  but  exceedingly  vain 
man.  Having  then,  as  we  intimate,  many  physical 
advantages,  these  were  admirably  displayed  by  his 
peculiar  style  of  dress,  which  had  just  enough  of  the 
clerical  to  satisfy  the  deacons,  who  believe  in  keep 
ing  up  a  prayerful  appearance,  and  just  enough  of 
the  poetic  to  make  him  interesting  to  the  fair  sex. 
Being  very  good  natured  and  extremely  affable,  he 
was  the  favorite  of  every  one,  especially  of  the  young 
girls,  who  thought  him  "  perfectly  splendid."  And 
he  really  was.  How  well  he  looked  as  he  stepped 
up  the  pulpit  stairs  in  his  peculiar  style  of  mingled 
stateliness  and  genial  foppishness,  and  threw  himself 
into  the  sacred  chair,  covering  his  brow  with  one 
hand,  as  if  penetrated  by  a  fitting  sense  of  the  so 
lemnity  of  the  moment !  In  a  charming  manner  he 
would  come  to  himself  again,  and  while  one  deli 
cate,  fat  hand  would  fall  negligently  by  his  side,  his 
head  would  be  thrown  up  with  a  nonchalant  air  ; 
and  the  lustrous  locks  which  had  slightly  overhung 
his  vision  being  thrown  aside  with  a  skillful  toss  of 
the  head,  he  would  treat  the  congregation  to  a  most 
benignant  stare. 

But  when  the  Rev.  Oratone  arose  and  prayed,  the 


56  ORATONE  BUZZ. 

sunlight  through  an  opportune  crack  in  the  shade  of 
the  window  parallel  with  the  pulpit  descending  upon 
his  beautiful  head,  and  crowning  it  with  a  halo  such 
as  those  we  are  wont  to  find  painted  around  the 
head  of  the  Lord,  in  the  favorite  pictures  of  him, 
what  a  worshipful  sight !  And  his  splendid  voice, 
how  it  gradually  increased  from  a  faint,  inarticulate 
murmur,  like  the  cooing  of  doves,  into  a  deep,  melo 
dious  sound,  and,  swelling,  broke  upon  the  ear  like 
the  music  of  the  surf  on  a  sandy  shore !  How  tune 
ful  it  could  be,  and  yet,  when  the  occasion  required 
it,  loud  and  menacing  as  thunder  among  the  moun 
tains  ! 

It  was  really  a  treat  to  see  him  rise  and  hear  him 
preach  from  his  favorite  text.  When  the  melody  of 
the  hymn  had  gradually  subsided,  he  would  arise 
with  a  very  imposing  mien,  as  if  he  were  about 
to  propound  a  most  unheard-of  truth,  and,  looking 
first  to  the  left  with  an  authoritative  glance,  say 
impressively,  "I  seek  not  mine  own  glory,"  get 
ting  nothing  but  a  wink  from  the  fortunate  occu 
pants  of  the  front  pews  in  reply,  who,  being  fully 
impressed  with  this  revelation,  he  would  turn  to 
the  right  and  repeat  it  with  a  similar  result ;  which 
momentous  labor  being  successfully  performed,  he 
would  take  his  audience  fairly  and  squarely  in  the 
centre,  and  again  the  words,  "  I  seek  not  mine  own 
glory,"  would  be  poured  unctuously  forth.  Then 
Madam  Demorest's  idea  would  be  carried  out  to  the 
letter,  and  the  appearance  completed  with  eclat. 

Yes,  indeed  :  Oratone  was  a  most  remarkable 
man  and  did  a  great  deal  of  good,  but  only  with 


OR  A  TONE  BUZZ. 


57 


his  voice,  his  enemies  cruelly  remarked ;  for  with 
brains  he  was  not  particularly  blessed.  Whether 
he  were  really  gifted  in  the  latter  respect  or  not, 
no  one  could  truly  affirm.  At  all  events,  he  made 
a  much  better  show  than  most  of  his  brethren  in 
words.  His  tact  was  admirable,  illimitable,  and  with 
the  magic  thereof  he  could  raise  thousands  for  the 
hundreds  they  produced,  and  invariably  preached  to 
a  full  house,  while  they  were  compelled  to  put  up 
with  four  walls,  six  people,  and  the  sexton  for  an 
auditory.  He  belonged  to  the  great  Independent 
Spirit  Navigation  Denomination,  being  vice-admi 
ral  at  least  of  that  astounding  organization  in 
Christ. 

When  Malcolm  first  heard  this  dignitary  preach, 
which  he  did  as  soon  as  he  came  to  Huberton  Uni 
versity,  he  hardly  knew  what  to  make  of  the  phe 
nomenon,  his  early  Presbyterianism  not  having  pre 
pared  him  for  anything  of  the  kind.  However,  he 
too  experienced  the  fascination  of  his  "taking  style," 
and  could  not  avoid  loving  the  man,  being  quite  able 
to  sympathize  with  a  companion  who  said  that,  if  he 
belonged  to  the  other  sex,  he  might  resign  his  heart 
as  well  as  his  soul  into  his  keeping.  The  competi 
tion  for  the  hand  of  his  reverence  had  been  great. 
We  cannot  enumerate  all  the  gifts  which  had  been 
showered  on  his  devoted  head,  but  this  every  one 
knows  for  a  fact,  —  namely,  he  sent  a  cart-load 
of  elegant  slippers,  gaily  embroidered  in  gold  and 
wool,  to  the  Home  of  the  Superannuated.  Who 
gave  them  to  him  ?  Do  not  blush,  fair  daughters  of 
Columbia  ;  nobody  blames  you,  bless  your  pious  lit- 


58  OR  ATONE  BUZZ. 

tie  hearts.  It  is  for  that  mysterious  conclave  popu 
larly  known  as  the  Standing  Committee  for  whom 
we  reserve  our  admonitions,  and  whose  attention 
we  would  earnestly  call  to  'the  latest  cases  of  eccle 
siastical  iniquity  on  record.  Listen  and  tremble, 
O  venerable  defenders  of  the  Faith !  If  you 
enshrine  a  good-looking  fellow  in  the  highest  seat 
of  a  splendid  edifice,  and  get  him  to  speak  as  one 
having  authority  from  Above  on  the  themes  most 
dear  to  the  heart  of  both  woman  and  man,  while  the 
most  sensuous  music  adds  to  the  glory  of  his  pres 
ence  and  of  his  eloquence,  you  must  not  be  aston 
ished  that  the  belles  of  the  congregation  should  sud 
denly  evince  a  marked  concern  about  their  souls 
and  prefer  the  society  of  the  shepherd  to  that  of 
such  sheep  as  yourselves. 


X. 

THE   RAINBOW   CREED. 

THE  Rainbow  Creed!  The  Rainbow  Creed! 
O  reader,  wouldn't  you  like  a  clear  definition 
thereof?  Of  course.  But  we  are  not  going  to  knock 
the  universe  into  a  cocked  hat  for  your  particular 
benefit.  So  we  leave  that  splendid  phenomenon 
among  the  mysteries  of  the  skies,  and  trust  to  your 
ingenuity  to  discover  what  we  mean.  What  can  you 
expect  from  so  enlightened  a  doctor  as  O.  Buzz  but 
a  belief  worthy  of  his  beautiful  voice  ?  For,  except 
ing  his  hatred  of  heresy,  and  a  little  worldliness,  in 
cidental,  of  course,  to  those  who  are  not  remarkable 
for  self-esteem  (considering  sundry  articles  of  their 
creed),  we  have  no  more  against  him  than  we  have 
against  ourselves.  For,  being  satirical,  we  cannot 
forget  that  we,  unfortunately,  are  among  the  goats 
who  cannot  share  with  the  Lord's  sheep  the  splen 
dors  of  Heaven.  And  so  disagreeable  is  this  thought 
that  our  only  consolation  is,  that  since  God  became 
human  for  sinners'  sake,  we  are  willing  to  be  anything 
for  the  sake  of  reclaiming  the  depraved. 

Yes,  Oratone  was  a  great  favorite,  and,  tell  you 
the  truth,  it  is  with  great  pleasure  we  condescend 
to  portray  his  belief  in  its  true  colors. 

The  conservative  liked  him  because  he  showed 
sufficient  respect  for  their  Peters,  Pauls,  Taberna- 

(59) 


60  ORATOXE  BUZZ. 

cles,  and  what  not.  The  semi-conservative  or  half- 
radical  liked  him  because  he  mentioned  science  with 
a  certain  amount  of  respect,  and  took  the  trouble  to 
try  and  reconcile  it  with  Genesis  and  Exodus  ;  and 
the  ultra-liberal  liked  him  as  everybody  did,  simply 
because  he  was  such  an  off-hand,  free-and-easy  good 
fellow,  who  cracked  some  of  the  best  jokes  going, 
and  never  was  severe  on  anybody  except  the  Devil 
and  Andrew  Johnson.  But  J.  Sweep  understands 
him  better  than  we. 

"  Did  it  ever  occur  to  thee,  O  Reader,  to  think  what 
Oratone  Buzz  and  his  friends  could  do  for  the  religious  life 
of  the  country,  —  for  the  religious  life  of  the  country?  I 
went  to  hear  him  and  Dr  Lullaby  preach,  as  advertised,  ex 
pecting  to  find,  from  the  high  tone  of  the  announcement,  a 
couple  of  Isaiahs  who  would  go  for  the  iniquity  of  the  times 
like  the  Pittsburg  thunder-storm  ;  but  found  only,  to  my  per 
manent  surprise,  sundry  sleek,  "cultivated"  gentlemen,  who 
stood  up  for  their  denominational  interests  in  the  pleasantest 
style  conceivable.  But  the  speeches  were  taking,  and  the 
prayers  superb.  What  more  is  needed  in  this  age  of  religious 
independence,  when  the  Sun  of  Godliness  shines  so  as  to 
create  on  the  surface  of  the  falling  sinners  such  amiable 
images  of  himself?  But  how  dreadful  the  thought  of  assimi 
lation  with  the  beams  !  Alas,  poor  Buzz  !  what  a  deprivation 
to  think  thy  honored  self-existence  should  be  swallowed  up  in 
God  according  to  the  dismal  forebodings  of  the  Pantheists  ! 
Permit  me,  O  most  potent  knight  of  the  rainbow,  to  relieve 
thy  mind.  There  is  not  the  smallest  danger  of  it.  Buzz  thou 
wast  born,  and  Buzz  thou  shalt  die.  'Tis  true,  in  the  sunshine 
of  God  thou  baskest  now,  like  the  glittering  insect  with  the 
sting  in  its  tail,  and,  taking  to  thyself  airs  thereat,  thou  buz- 
zest  in  His  face,  even  while  thou,  by  thine  own  confession,  art 
the  worm's  inferior.  Know  for  good  that  the  Son  of  Man 
is  God,  and  that  thou  indeed  art  nothing,  simply  because  thou 
art  Buzz,  and  for  no  other  reason  under  the  sun." — J.  Sweep's 
A  ulobiography. 


XI. 


A  MOST   INCOMPREHENSIBLE  THING. 

THE  time  at  length  arrived  for  the  young  peo 
ple  to  separate.  It  was  a  bitter  hour  for  both, 
but  Hope  and  Faith  were  there  to  illuminate  the 
future,  and  promise  a  speedy  reunion.  They  parted 
exchanging  vows  of  constancy  and  other  expressions 
of  regard.  Malcolm  was  soon  himself  again.  With 
such  a  Dulcinea  as  the  fair  Jennie,  who  would  not 
be  glad  to  equip  himself  in  the  sacred  armor,  and 
go  out  to  fight  the  good  fight,  wind-mills  or  no 
wind-mills  ! 

Malcolm  soon  arrived  in  Huberton,  the  city  of  his 
destination,  and,  presenting  his  letters  of  introduc 
tion  to  the  faculty  of  the  college,  was  graciously 
received  ;  and,  thanks  to  the  influence  of  his  pat 
ron,  the  celebrated  miracle  protector,  Mr.  Crisp,  the 
janitor  appointed  him  to  one  of  the  best  rooms  in 
the  building. 

In  a  short  time  he  felt  quite  at  home,  and  gave 
himself  up  to  his  studies  with  most  untiring  zeal. 
He  was  indefatigable.  Entirely  absorbed  by  his  be 
loved  books,  he  rarely  slept  more  than  five  hours, 
and  scarcely  ever  went  .out  to  spend  an  evening 
at  the  theatre,  or  as  the  guest  of  some  hospitable 
family.  Had  he  not  possessed  a  constitution  of 
iron,  he  would  have  succumbed  to  the  pressure  on 

(61) 


62  OR  A  TONE  BUZZ. 

his  brain.  He  was  cautioned  against  immodera 
tion  in  this  respect.  But,  like  one  who  has  com 
menced  to  run  down  a  steep  hill,  he  could  not  stop 
himself.  The  boy  realized  his  ignorance,  as  Ban 
yan's  Pilgrim  did  the  burden  upon  his  shoulders, 
and  he  hurried  to  get  rid  of  it  without  the  incessant 
groaning  that  characterized  Christian  on  his  way 
to  relief. 

As  yet  there  was  only  one  thing  to  trouble  him, 
and  that  was  the  prayer  question.  Heretofore  the 
Lord's  Prayer  had  been  ample  for  him  and  his  little 
wants,  but  now  it  was  different.  The  Hubertonians, 
judging  from  the  salaries  they  paid  the  gifted  in 
the  art  of  supplication,  were  particularly  fond  of 
long  prayers,  and  if  he  intended  to  make  himself  an 
acceptable  knight,  it  was  quite  necessary  to  cul 
tivate  a  prayerful  spirit.  Yet  there  were  a  few  diffi 
culties  in  the  way  of  his  attempt  to  acquire  profi 
ciency  in  this  branch  of  the  service.  His  early 
piety  had  already  taught  him  that  prayer  should  be 
the  free,  spontaneous  request  for  whatever  one  de 
sired  at  the  hand  of  God.  But  intuitively  or  experi 
mentally  being  aware  that  that  Being  has  a  pardon 
able  fondness  for  helping  those  who  are  wise  enough 
to  help  themselves,  he  could  not  see  that  he  gained 
anything  by  the  mere  utterance  of  his  wishes. 
He  was,  on  the  other  hand,  stiongly  inclined  to 
look  upon  public  prayer  as  a  vain  display,  and  a 
mere  evaporation  of  energy  that  might  be  more 
profitably  employed.  And  the  more  he  studied, 
the  more  lively  this  antipathy  of  his  against  it  be 
came,  so  that,  as  the  days  flew  by,  he  grew  almost 


OR  ATONE   BUZZ.  63 

ashamed  of  asking  God  to  increase  the  wealth  of 
his  universe  by  improving  either  himself  or  others. 
"  How  can  people,"  he  observed  to  a  friend,  "  expect 
supernatural  aid,  when  they  will  not  take  the  trouble 
to  fulfill  the  natural  conditions  of  health  and  im 
provement.  On  all  sides  I  see  individuals,  not 
remarkable  for  love  of  goodness,  asking  favors  of 
God,  as  if  he  were  not  already  there  to  second  every 
honest  effort  towards  improvement.  Considering, 
then,  the  Infinite  Power  of  self-help  already  pos 
sessed  by  the  world,  it  is  a  mystery  to  me  that  it 
should  always  be  asking  for  more.  And  I  suppose 
this  is  why  I  exhibit  so  little  fluency  in  addressing 
the  Heavens,  and  also  why  I  should  prefer  Endeav 
or —  sweet,  honest  Endeavor — to  that  which  is  or 
dinarily  termed  '  prayer.'  The  former  certainly  has 
been  the  food  of  my  life,  and  in  regard  to  the  latter, 
if  it  can  be  called  the  bread  of  life,  it  tastes  strongly 
of  something  spurious.  For,  to  be  sincere  with  you, 
although  I  sometimes  lead  in  prayer,  I  often  feel 
that  I  am  doing  wrong.  However,  I  appease  my 
conscience  with  the  thought  that  true  prayer  is  sim 
ply  a  kind  of  poetry  natural  to  those  who  love  and 
reverence  the  Creator.  And  I  am  only  sorry  that 
I  should  make  so  poor  a  figure  in  trying  to  do  at 
stated  times  what  ought  to  be  the  spontaneous  out 
pouring  of  my  spirit.  But  this  unpleasant  experi 
ence  of  mine  may  be  due  to  a  perversity  of  disposi 
tion  which  will,  I  hope,  wear  away,  according  as  my 
heart  opens  to  the  Spirit  of  God." 

"If  that  view  of  prayer  be  correct,"  said  his  friend, 
"how  can  we  find  words  sufficiently  expressive  of  our 


64 


OR  ATONE  BUZZ. 


regard  for  those  gifted  beings  who  can,  at  a  moment's 
warning,  rise  and  pour  forth  a  stream  of  poetry  suf 
ficient  to  float  and  carry  away  a  whole  fleet  of  hum 
ble  vessels." 

The  following  incident  in  the  life  of  the  late  Dr. 
McLeod,  of  Glasgow  in  Scotland,  he  read  with 
great  edification.  That  gentleman,  in  company  with 
Dr.  Watson,  another  clergyman,  was  crossing  a  lake 
in  the  Highlands  in  a  small  boat.  McLeod  was  a  very 
large  man  and  Watson  a  small  one.  They  were  sur 
prised  in  the  middle  of  the  lake  by  a  terrific  squall. 
The  rest  of  the  passengers,  consisting  of  sundry  old 
women,  being  dreadfully  frightened,  implored  the 
doctors  to  pray.  Both  lifted  up  their  faces  and  were 
about  to  comply  with  the  request,  when  a  stalwart 
boatman  turned  round  and  said,  "  Stop  there,  '  mins- 
turs,'  the  wee  ane  can  pray  as  lang  as  he  likes,  but 
the  big  ane  must  tak'  an  oar." 

Said  Malcolm  in  one  of  his  best  moments :  "  I  am 
here  to  learn  the  Truth ;  and  to  this  end,  were  it  not 
for  false  desires,  I  could  count  my  years  as  pennies, 
and  fling  them  one  by  one  into  the  hand  of  Death  to 
pay  my  way.  Why  must  I  stop  to  speak  like  the 
rest  ?  Surely  that  cannot  be  prayer  which  hinders 
me  so  ;  and  if  it  is  prayer  how  strange  it  is  that  I 
cannot  pray  unless  I  imitate  somebody." 

What  first  drew  Malcolm's  attention  to  this  sub 
ject  was  rather  an  amusing  incident  in  his  scholastic 
experience.  For  a  few  days  another  student  had 
shared  his  room,  and  when  night  arrived  both  went  to 
bed  and  arose  in  the  morning  in  entire  oblivion  of 
the  necessity  of  prayer.  At  last  Brown,  as  the 


OR  ATONE  BUZZ.  65 

other  student  was  called,  a  dapper,  little,  red-headed 
fellow,  came  to  Malcolm  and  said  in  a  very  solemn 
tone,  "  It  seems  to  me  that  we  have  not  been  faith 
ful  to  our  Eternal  interests  ;  but,  not  to  speak  of 
these,  if  we  intend  to  be  Christian  ministers  it  is 
very  necessary  that  we  should  give  some  time  to 
prayer.  Ought  we  not  to  exercise  ourselves  in  pri 
vate,  that  we  may  excel  in  the  public  performance 
of  the  devotional  function.  ?" 

"  Certainly,  friend,"  exclaimed  Malcolm,  who  at 
the  time  actually  felt  the  force  of  his  chum's  remark, 
"  ease  of  utterance  is  essential." 

"  Well,"  said  Brown,  in  genuine  sacerdotal  style, 
"  I'll  officiate  to-night  and  you  will  in  the  morning." 

"All  right,"  said  Malcolm,  who  had  again  re 
sumed  his  pen. 

That  night  Brown  knelt,  and,  after  making  an  ex 
cellent  prayer,  rose  and  "  turned  in  "  in  an  excellent 
humor  with  himself.  Malcolm  envied  him  his  flow 
of  words,  and  asked  how  he  contrived  to  pray  so 
easily.  That  embryo  public  instructor  called  to 
him,  from  under  the  blankets,  that  faith  was  the 
key  to  the  door  of  that  gift,  and  that  he  ought  to 
give  it  as  much  attention  as  he  could. 

Next  morning  Malcolm  arose  as  usual,  entirely 
forgetting  the  promised  officiation.  Not  so  his 
friend,  who  piously  informed  him  that  it  was  "  his 
turn."  Thereupon  they  both  knelt,  in  "  the  trailing 
garments  of  the  night,"  each  at  his  own  bedside, 
and  Malcolm  lifted  up  his  voice.  He  had  hardly 
reached  the  end  of  the  first  sentence,  when  a  most 
overpowering  sense  of  the  absurdity  of  the  whole 
5 


66  OR  ATONE  BUZZ. 

proceeding  came  over  him,  so  that  he  could  not 
utter  a  word.  He  broke  down  most  infamously,  to 
the  amazement  of  little  Brown,  who,  removing  a 
sanctimonious  finger  from  his  left  eye,  looked  round 
to  see  what  was  keeping  him.  Poor  Malcolm,  who 
naturally  wondered  how  Brown  was  taking  this  stop 
page  in  the  transmission  of  the  message  to  the  gods, 
also  removed  a  finger  from  the  eye  nearest  the  ex 
pectant  hearer,  and  turned  his  head  slightly  in  his 
direction.  Their  eyes  met,  and  for  a  moment  gazed 
into  one  another,  the  one  indicating  profound  amaze 
ment,  and  the  other  a  vague  anxiety.  What  were 
they  to  do  ?  Suddenly  the  ludicrousness  of  the  situa 
tion  told  on  Malcolm  so  powerfully  that  he  could  not 
repress  the  mirth  that  bubbled  to  his  lips.  Brown 
caught  the  infection,  and,  affected  likewise,  the  gentle 
mirth  rapidly  grew  into  peals  of  convulsive  merri 
ment.  It  is  needless  to  say  that  from  that  day  to 
this  these  young  men  never  officiated  for  each  other. 
But  Malcolm,  notwithstanding  all  this  budding 
of  his  naturally  radical  mind,  was  still  under  some 
superstitious  influences.  He  blamed  his  unemo 
tional  nature  for  his  repugnance  to  prayer  by  word 
of  mouth.  His  words  were,  "I  am  not  in  step  with 
the  rest  of  the  troops.  I  must  get  in  as  soon  as  I 
can,  or  cease  to  march  in  the  ranks."  He  made 
no  secret  of  this  remarkable  deficiency,  and  it  was 
soon  entered  in  the  books  of  the  Faculty  against 
him.  His  destined  father-in-law  was  informed  of  it, 
and  he  was  suddenly  treated  to  an  affectionate  but 
Christian  letter,  in  which  Mr.  Crisp  sharply  told  him 
that  if  he  wished  to  retain  his  friendship,  he  must 


OR  ATONE  BUZZ.  6/ 

not  reject  the  sweet  spirit  of  prayer.  Poor  Mal 
colm  !  this  preference  of  his  for  the  tough  spirit  of 
noiseless  effort  was  most  unfortunate. 

Beyond  this  defect,  there  was  as  yet  nothing  to 
mar  his  reputation  for  "  soundness,"  beyond  a  little 
carelessness  in  the  display  of  his  humor.  But  since 
Malcolm's  early  experience  of  prayer  is  not,  per 
haps,  deep  enough  to  give  the  full  significance  there 
of,  we  call  upon  Mr.  Sweep  to  append  a  word  to  this 
chapter. 

"  Who  dares,"  says  he,  with  that  defiant  air  of 
omniscience  he  loves  to  assume,  "  to  say  aught 
against  the  common  custom  of  ages,  where,  like 
grass-roots  in  the  soil,  the  sons  of  men  meet  and 
intermingle  ?  The  deepest  thoughts,  noblest  acts, 
have  started,  like  mailed  Minervas  from  the  brains 
of  gods,  under  the  influence  of  prayer.  But  what 
sort  of  prayer  was  it  ?  O  my  brother,  mistake  not 
the  peacock  voice  of  vanity  and  the  groans  of  indo 
lent  sin  for  the  noise  of  the  many  tides  of  energy  as 
they  rise  to  sweep  all  obstacles  from  their  path,  as 
in  the  case  of  such  ministers  as  Oliver  Cromwell 
and  John  Bunyan.  Think  again,  Mr.  Twenty  Min 
utes  Long,  ere  you  roll  your  soul  into  the  empty  O's, 
the  naughts  of  naughtiness  which  bubble  from  your 
lips.  Some  prayers  are  the  shouts  of  the  Faith 
which  moves  the  mountains,  and  rides,  like  Apollo, 
in  a  chariot  of  fire,  the  pith  of  the  universe." 


XII. 

A  GLANCE   AT  THE  TIMES. 

HOW  happens  it  that  prophecy  has  vanished 
from  the  earth  ?  Artifice  is  ever  the  death  of 
true  greatness.  "I  see,"  says  J.  Sweep,  "man  must 
return  to  the  natural  state  of  the  Spirit."  In  the 
days  of  savage  innocence  and  poetic  knowledge, 
in  spite  of  the  absence  of  science  —  how  superior 
the  method  of  reform  !  The  ancient  reformer  did 
not  get  up  a  speech  that  would  take,  but  got  up 
himself;  and  God  got  up  with  him,  and  girding 
their  loins,  the  great  religions  of  the  world  flowed 
from  their  hearts.  How  is  it  that  we,  with  all  our  lit 
erature  and  science,  are  obliged  to  gyrate  round  their 
accidental  words  ?  No  wonder  the  sons  of  Atlas,  the 
laborers  who  bear  the  burden  of  the  world,  seeing 
how  well  they  can  dispense  with  the  guidance  of 
the  Church,  maintain  they  can  do  without  any  kind 
of  government.  Strange  sounds,  indeed,  are  heard 
in  the  silence  of  the  night,  and  still  stranger  shapes 
hover  in  the  opacity  overhead,  threatening  at  any 
moment  to  take  new  forms  of  destruction.  The 
time,  it  seems  to  us,  has  arrived  for  all  people  to 
speak  just  as  they  think,  regardless  of  the  infirmities 
of  their  dispositions,  which,  in  spite  of  the  most 
profound  artifice,  are  clear  to  the  eye  of  the  seer. 


XIII. 

THE  VALLEY   OF   THE   SHADOW. 

f  I  SHERE  is  a  fatal  blindness  in  civilization. 
-1-  Tacitus,  the  Roman  prophet,  critic  and  gen 
tleman,  with  all  his  advantages,  could  see  nothing 
but  a  baneful  superstition  in  the  rising  faith  of  his 
day,  Christianity. 

A  new  superstition  has  appeared  in  our  midst, 
and  certainly,  as  far  as  our  vision  goes,  with  greater 
circumstances  of  success  than  were  originally  pos 
sessed  by  Christianity,  excepted,  however,  the  rath 
er  startling  fact  that  no  Jesus  has  yet  died  for 
it.  Nor  can  it  ever  be  hoped  by  its  most  dis 
tinguished  supporters  that  any  person  will  be  led 
to  do  so  until  he  has  ascertained  that  the  eternity 
of  the  soul  is  not  a  Debatable  Land.  In  view,  then, 
of  the  monstrosities  of  modern  religion  we  do  not 
know  whether  to  laugh  or  weep  at  the  phenomen 
ology  of  the  Spirit,  whether  interpreted  by  a  Hegel 
or  the  latest  reporter  of  the  last  theological  news 
paper.  But  since  we  realize  the  necessity  of  doing 
something,  we  cut  the  knot  of  our  dilemma  by  do 
ing  both  as  faithfully  as  we  can,  not  forgetting  our 
own  entanglement  in  the  net  of  involuntary  Fate. 
The  magnitude  of  knowledge  cuirent  concerning 
the  religions  of  all  nations  bewildered  Malcolm,  but 
why  the  first  principles  of  any  one  in  particular  were 

(69) 


70  ORATOXE  BUZZ. 

not  better  appreciated  and  applied,  puzzled  him  be 
yond  the  power  of  language  to  express.  And  it 
was  this  experience  which  first  led  him  to  believe 
that  he  had  as  good  a  right  to  think  as  he  pleased  as 
either  Jew  or  Gentile,  Christian  or  Mohammedan. 
Thus  armed  and  equipped  by  this  opportune  solu 
tion  of  his  difficulties,  he  had  no  conscientious 
scruples  whatever  in  rejecting  the  mixed  philosophy 
and  dogmatic  assertion  of  his  teachers  for  the  natu 
ral  religion  of  his  own  heart,  which  told  him  that 
he,  too,  insignificant  as  he  felt  himself  to  be  in  his 
relations  to  mankind,  could  aspire  to  a  direct  revela 
tion  from  God.  And,  unconsciously  inspired  by 
this  thought,  he  applied  himself  to  the  study  of 
whatever  was  likely  to  throw  light  on  the  mystery 
of  his  being.  But,  of  course  the  reader  will  see 
that  this  idea  in  its  beginning,  like  the  thought  of 
his  kingship,  could  have  been  only  a  weak  presenti 
ment  of  what  was  to  come. 

Beyond  his  poor  prayers,  we  said,  there  was,  at 
first,  but  little  in  his  manner  or  speech  to  arouse 
the  suspicion  of  his  soundness.  But,  in  the  course 
of  time,  the  authorities  had  more  certain  grounds 
for  alarm.  Drs.  Benjamin  Tightcreed  and  Oratone 
Buzz  having  heard  from  the  lips  of  one  Single- 
face,  an  officious  student,  that  Malcolm  was  a  her 
etic  of  the  deepest  dye,  summoned  him  to  answer 
the  charge.  The  culprit  was  straightway  ushered 
into  the  mystic  presence  of  these  dread  inquisitors, 
and  questione4<*is  to  his  precise  views  on  the  vica 
rious  atonement,  about  which  he  had  spoken,  they 
affirmed,  in  irreverent  terms.  However,  he  had  the 


OR  ATONE  BUZZ.  ji 

presence  of  mind  to  say  that  he  was  as  yet  some 
what  uncertain  about  his  theological  position,  but 
hoped  erelong  to  give  them  an  exact  statement  of  his 
views.  Upon  this  he  was  informed  by  the  speaker 
that,  while  they  had  the  warmest  appreciation  of 
free  thought,  they  felt  it  their  duty  to  cry  halt  when 
and  wherever  the  efficacy  of  Jesus'  atoning  sacri 
fice  was  concerned.  For,  as  Dr.  Tightcreed  forcibly 
stated,  "  nothing  is  more  dangerous  in  this  age  of 
rash  statement  and  unsettled  conviction  than  the 
smallest  aspersion  on  that  infallible  means  of  re 
demption." 

The  culprit  replied  :  "  I  glory  in  the  essential  truth 
of  religion,  as  visible  in  the  lives  of  all  good  and 
great  men,  and  do  not  see  why  you  should  insist  so 
strenuously  on  a  mere  dogma  which,  however  essen 
tial  to  ignorant  minds,  is  not  required  for  one  who 
can  be  trusted  to  think  freely." 

Upon  this  the  solemn  conclave  exchanged  looks  of 
pain  and  alarm,  and  Oratone  Buzz  informed  him  that 
he  was  on  the  road  to  destruction,  and  that  unless 
he  took  the  advice  of  the  Evangelist  he  would  rue 
the  day.  He  attempted  to  reply,  but  his  voice  was 
drowned  by  Dr.  Buzz,  who  arose  in  the  heat  of 
his  zeal,  and  spake  as  follows  :  "  To  your  knees, 
audacious  boy !  not  three  months  in  the  college, 
yet  you  dare  to  dispute  the  Word  of  God,  as  given 
you  by  the  lawful  guardians  of  the  Faith  !  " 

"  I  have  as  good  a  right  as  either  Calvin  or  Luther, 
Butler  or  Beecher,  to  say  what  I  think,  seeing  that  I 
do  so  honestly.  This  is  a  question  with  which  neither 
time  nor  place  has  anything  to  do." 


72  OR  ATONE  BUZZ. 

"  And  do  you,"  continued  Buzz,  "  do  you,  a  mere 
boy,  as  yet  unfamiliar  with  the  doctrines  of  the 
Church  and  the  research  of  professors,  presume  to 
know  better  than  we  ? " 

"  I  do  not  pretend,"  replied  Malcolm,  "  to  know 
anything  at  all,  but  speak  as  freely  as  I  think  ;  and, 
far  from  contradicting  you,  I  only  express  my  mind 
as  affected  by  the  substance  of  your  doctrine." 

Progressive  Bungle,  D.D.,  a  large,  blue-eyed,  good- 
humored  gentleman,  now  spoke  for  the  first  time, 
saying  that  he,  for  his  part,  did  not  see  any  harm  in 
the  youth,  since  his  idea  of  free  thought  did  not  pre 
clude  fellowship  with  any  earnest  seeker  of  the  truth. 
"  But,  brethren,"  he  added,  "  do  as  ye  please  with 
him,  —  as  ye  think  best  for  the  Lord's  cause."  Here 
Dr.  Benjamin  Tightcreed,  a  stout  old  gentleman  with 
a  red  nose,  in  an  advanced  stage  of  spiritual  experi 
ence,  attired  in  the  most  rigid  black,  declared  : 
"  Gentlemen,  it  is  needless  to  discuss  the  matter 
with  this  headstrong  youth.  Let  him  suffer  the 
consequences  of  his  petulance.  The  question  of  his 
position,  as  appears  to  me,  is  very  simple.  Does  he, 
or  does  he  not,  accept  salvation  through  the  merits 
of  Christ  as  the  Redeemer  and  the  Judge  of  the 
world  t  If  he  does,  well  and  good  ;  he  may  stay 
and  receive  the  benefits  of  our  institution  and  so 
cieties.  But  if,  on  the  other  hand,  he  does  not,  let 
him  be  driven  from  the  place,  lest  he  scatter  the 
seeds  of  infidelity  among  his  companions." 

At  this  moment  Dr.  Lullaby,  the  vice-president 
of  the  college,  a  mild,  soft-featured  man  wi{;h  a  per 
petual  smile,  intervened  to  this  effect :  "  It  is  not, 


OR  ATONE  BUZZ.  73 

good  brethren,  worth  our  while  to  concern  ourselves 
about  the  extravagances  of  this  young  man,  since 
they  are  only  the  gleams  peculiar  to  visionary 
youth.  And  let  us  remember,  all  things  considered, 
that  he  is  not  alone  in  the  frail  boat  of  heresy.  Nor 
is  he  at  all  likely  not  to  outgrow  his  doubts,  con 
sidering  the  utter  foolishness  of  differing  from  the 
standard  authorities.  Just  observe,"  and  the  Rev. 
gentleman  waxed  eloquent,  "  how  unprofitable  heresy 
is !  how  infinitesimally  little  a  person  can  gain  by 
adopting  the  self-sufficient  notions  and  the  preten 
tious  infidelity  of  the  period  !  So,  friends,  let  us  be 
patient  and  sympathizing  to  the  extent  of  our  ability 
with  those  unfortunates  who,  unable  to  appreciate 
the  blessings  of  Christianity,  reject  them  for  self- 
indulgence  in  a  dismal  intuitionalism  and  opaque 
transcendentalism.  Such  Utopianism  may  serve  to 
amuse  the  unoccupied  minds  of  tailors  and  in-door 
workers  ;  but  those  who  subject  themselves  to  the 
tear  and  wear  of  the  world  require  something  more 
palpable." 

This  remark  was  as  oil  to  the  troubled  waters. 
Tightcreed  was  pacified,  Bungle  gratified  ;  and  Ora- 
tone  Buzz  smiled  as  he  rose,  and  said,  "  Retire,  my 
dear  boy,  to  the  silence  of  the  closet,  and  pray  for 
the  help  which  you  so  sorely  need  ;  and,  when  you 
resume  your  studies,  avoid,  as  you  would  the  wrath 
to  come,  the  perils  of  German  philosophy,  the  heath- 
thenism  of  Goethe,  and  the  paganism  of  Carlyle.  Con 
sider  how  eminently  calculated  the  genius  of  Brother 
Lullaby  to  improve  your  prospects  of  being  a  suc 
cessful  minister  and  a  worthy  son-in-law  of  my 
friend  Crisp." 


74  OR  ATONE  BUZZ. 

Malcolm  bowed  himself  out,  deeply  impressed  by 
the  last  words  of  Dr.  Buzz,  and  for  the  first  time  he 
began  to  enjoy  himself  as  a  respectable  member  of 
society,  with  somewhat  less  regard,  however,  for  the 
great  men  he  had  worshiped  in  the  silence  of  the 
closet.  But  not  till  the  great  theatres  of  Huberton 
were  opened  for  the  revival  of  the  religion  of  the 
country  did  he  discover  whether  he  or  the  whole 
Christian  world  were  the  bigger  fool.  The  neglect 
of  his  studies,  however,  was  in  part  occasioned  by 
the  arrival  of  Mr.  Crisp  and  his  daughter,  who  came 
to  pass  a  few  weeks  in  Huberton.  They  introduced 
him  to  many  nice  people,  and  in  the  gayety  of  the 
moment  he  ceased  to  think  about  himself.  Not  till 
Miss  Crisp  left  for  home  did  he  have  a  minute's 
serious  talk  with  her.  It  was  to  this  effect :  — 

"  Now,  Malcolm,"  said  that  young  lady,  with  an 
unusually  solemn  air,  rather  foreign  to  her  charac 
ter,  "  I  want  you  to  be  as  good  and  religious  as  you 
possibly  can  ;  for  papa  has  been  hearing  strange 
things  of  you.  You  know  he  cannot  bear  those 
dreadful  free-thinkers.  Before  he  left  home  he 
turned  off  Mr.  Snoozletalk  for  leaving  the  Ortho 
dox  Church,  and  joining  the  Free  Religious  Society 
of  Bragville.  Of  course,  you  know  his  little  pecu 
liarity  in  this  respect.  Now,  while  I  would  not  have 
you  —  no,  not  for  the  world  —  fail  to  tell  the  truth, 
don't,  as  you  love  me,  say  anything  out  of  the  way." 

"  What  way  ?  "  asked  Malcolm,  archly. 

"You  know  right  well  what  I  mean,"  said  the 
ingenuous  maiden. 

"  Out  of  the  old-fashioned  way,  you  mean,  don't 
you  ? " 


ORATONE  BUZZ.  75 

"  Well,  what  if  I  do  ?  "  said  the  young  lady,  de 
fiantly.  "  Is  it  not  the  best  way  there  is  ?  " 

"  I  do  not  say  that  it  is  not ;  but  you  will  at  least 
grant  that,  judging  from  the  catechism,  it  is  rather  a 
questionable  way." 

"  Yet,  for  all  that,  it  may  be  better  than  a  great 
many  others.  Do  you  believe  in  planchette  and  the 
psychometer  ?  Miss  Flippert,  who  took  the  first 
prize  in  algebra,  consults  the  one,  and  says  she  sees 
her  future  husband  through  the  other.  Now,  if 
Julia  was  a  Christian,  she  would  not  do  such  things. 
People  who  do  not  believe  in  God  have  great  faith 
in  ghosts,  it  would  appear." 

"  But,  Jennie,  you  do  worse  things  than  that. 
You  look  at  your  future  life  through  the  death  and 
resurrection  of  somebody  who  lived  near  two  thou 
sand  years  ago.  There's  a  psychometer  for  you." 

"  Oh,  you  impious  fellow,  papa  would  be  very  angry 
if  he  heard  you  talk  so  !  What  do  you  mean  ?  " 

"  I  only  want  you  to  look  at  the  future  life  through 
the  psychometer  of  your  own  thought." 

"  So  I  do  ;  but  the  thought  of  Christ  is  great,  and 
I  would  require  a  magnifying  glass  to  see  it  through 
mine.  But,  Malcolm,  I  will  trust  you  ;  be  careful 
and  good."  And  they  parted  for  the  present. 


XIV. 

THE   SPECTRE   PARTY. 

r  |  "*HE  soul  is  immortal,"  says  the  reader.  "  And 
-A.  so  say  I,"  echoes  Inverse  Vision,  a  poor  radi 
cal  fowl  predestined,  perhaps,  to  make  a  dinner  for 
some  fox  of  a  critic  ;  "  for,  enthroned  as  I  am  in 
the  Hub  of  the  Universe,  where  comets  and  stars 
of  all  imaginable  magnificence  spin  around  me  in 
endless  succcession,  how  can  I  shut  my  eyes  to  the 
eternity  that  is  revealed  in  each  ?  Here  I  sit  in 
just  sufficient  shade  to  see  those  fire-works  of  God 
shoot  forth  in  all  their  native  splendor,  and  splinter, 
at  last,  as  they  culminate,  into  rainbow  rings  of  glory 
before  they  expire  on  the  pale  breast  of  the  morning. 
Tarry  with  me,  O  my  brother,  for  one  short  moment, 
for  I  would  fain  refresh  thy  sight  with  the  pageantry 
of  the  Spirit.  But  what  awful  change  is  this  ?  Thick 
clouds  have  gathered,  and  it  were  well  to  take  refuge 
in  yonder  ruin.  What  a  weird  old  house  is  this,  with 
its  broken  pillars  and  dilapidated  arches  !  Yet  how 
young  it  seems  when  I  recall  the  tides  of  generations 
which  ebbed  and  flowed  before  it  was  left  like  a  pebble 
on  the  beach  !  And  so  I  dream  the  past,  and  see 
the  present  ;  and  meanwhile  the  dream  blends  with 
the  vision  to  the  transfiguration  of  all  things.  The 
ruin  dissolves  ;  and  behold,  in  its  place,  the  wide 
perspective  of  an  illuminated  hall.  Yet  even  here 

(76) 


OR  ATONE  BUZZ.  77 

a  motley  throng  of  phantoms  evolve  themselves,  and 
glide  gaily  or  wag  adroitly  across  the  polished  floors. 
It  is  not  a  dim,  sepulchral  light  that  envelops  me 
now  ;  nor  do  shrouds  shield  the  bones  of  the  spectres 
from  my  gaze.  The  moonlight  yields  to  the  gas-glare 
of  the  Christian  sociable,  and  the  bones  gleam  in  the 
gorgeous  apparel  of  the  ball  ;  for  Dr.  Lullaby  is  the 
ghostly  pastor  of  the  ghosts.  Hark  !  the  necropoli- 
tan  festivity  begins  with  a  prayer,  and  a  thousand 
spectral  fans  pat  responsive  to  its  exquisite  rhythm. 
'  All  flesh  is  grass,'  I  hear  the  spectre  pastor  cry  ; 
and  after  that  the  words,  '  Let  the  dead  bury  their 
dead/  roll  rumbling  on  the  floor,  and  reverberate 
grimly  in  his  hollow  wicker-work  of  bone.  I  now 
recall  the  real  artillery  of  God,  and  marvel  much  at 
the  exceeding  great  ghostliness  of  the  speech.  Yet 
I  marvel  still  more  as  the  votaries  of  Fashion  inter- 
blend,  and  lose  each  his  personality  in  confused  cir 
cles  of  satin  and  silk,  of  velvet  and  coral,  of  diamond 
and  flounce,  the  green  interblending  with  the  gold, 
the  drab  with  the  purple,  and  the  pink  with  the 
pale,  —  a  perfect  chaos  of  broken  rainbows  in  soft 
est  collision  :  children  of  Death  playing  with  pea 
cocks'  feathers  on  their  father's  hell-lit  tombs  ;  a  Cath 
erine-wheel  revolving  furiously  on  the  cross  of  Christ 
or  on  the  edge  of  the  gallows.  But  is  there  .10  sign 
of  reality  here  ?  None  ;  for  even  Malcolm,  at  this 
time,  is  among  the  dead.  He  looks,  like  the  rest, 
with  admiration  on  that  great  progressive,  Dr.  Lul 
laby,  the  pivot  of  this  whirling  beauty,  —  the  father, 
son,  and  particularly  the  ghost  of  the  rainbow  all  in 
one,  —  and  wishes,  in  his  ghostliness,  to  give  up 


78  OR  ATONE  BUZZ. 

all,  and  follow  him.  '  Bestow  upon  us,  O  Sun  of 
Righteousness/  he  hears  him  pray,  '  the  rays  of  thy 
wisdom  and  love  ;  for,  poor  worms  that  we  are,  we 
long  to  be  warmed  into  new  Life  in  thee.' 

"  O  poor  ghosts,  what  horrible  sins  have  caused 
you  to  so  haunt  the  Church  of  Fashion,  and  in 
trude  thus  your  dismal  faces  in  the  vision  of  living 
men  ? "  And  the  Rev.  Mr.  Treacherous  Chin,  an 
old  ghost  in  the  stiffest  of  collars,  replies,  Because 
I  prefer  the  '  primrose  path '  of  expedient  sin,  while 
my  brother  there,  Mr.  Sanctimonious  Lip  in  his 
new  carryall,  chooses  the  '  steep  and  thorny  road 
that  leads  to  Heaven.' 

"  O  ye  seas,  that  catch  to  your  hearts  whole  herds 
of  bedeviled  swine,  look  well  to  your  sky-reflecting 
faces,  for  horrible  things  come  to  the  surface  after  a 
while  !  And  O  ye  plains,  which  reproduce  the  eternal 
stars  in  your  flowerets,  look  well  to  your  soil,  for 
many  a  bitter  seed  is  sown  with  the  sweet !  Avaunt, 
ye  grisly  phantoms  of  the  day  !  yet  yield,  ere  ye  go, 
your  spirit-photographs  to  your  friends  in  the  flesh. 
Mr.  Common  Vision  will  now  relieve  us  by  finishing." 

Dr.  Lullaby  greets  his  friends  as  they  come,  taking 
care  not  to  repel  those  whose  conscious  looks  betray 
them  not  to  be  quite  bon  ton,  yet  to  treat  the  influen- 
tials  with  adequate  respect.  He  smiles  a  most  capti 
vating  smile  :  "  Good  evening,  Mrs.  Furblow.  Good 
evening,  Miss  Furblow  and  Miss  Fanny.  Dear  me ! 
this  is  a  surprise.  I  thought  you  were  still  in  Eu 
rope,  Mrs.  Furblow,  with  Mr.  —  " 

"  Oh  !  "  replied  that  lady,  "  we  returned  a  few  days 
ago.  We  really  had  to  come  and  attend  to  our 


OR  ATONE  BUZZ.  79 

girls  here :  they  do  so  need  a  mother's  care.  For 
their  sake  we  had  to  give  up  the  Pope,  Florence, 
and  Naples,  and  much  else." 

"  But  you  can  return  soon,"  said  the,  doctor,  sym 
pathetically,  "  with  your  fair  blossoms  here,"  —  his 
eye  falling  admiringly  upon  the  fresh,  violet-eyed 
faces  of  the  dear  girls,  who  were  gaily  decked  out 
in  blue  silk  and  Valenciennes. 

"Oh,  yes,  Dr.  Lullaby,"  chimed  in  Miss  Fannie, 
who  was  sixteen  and  very  enthusiastic.  "  We  should 
admire  to  go.  I  wish  ma  would  take  us  right  away. 
But  there ! "  (assuming  a  serious  tone)  "  we  would 
have  to  give  up  your  nice  sermons.  They  have 
done  us  a  great  deal  of  good." 

"  I  am  rejoiced  to  hear  it,"  said  his  puissance 
affectionately,  only  a  slight  shade  of  unction  dis 
cernible  in  his  tone,  and  was  going  to  add  some 
thing  about  being  a  humble  instrument,  &c.,  in  the 
hands  of  the  Lord,  when  Miss  Furblow  told  him 
that  that  book,  "  Christ  in  the  Soul,"  he  had  lent 
her  was  a  treasure,  and  that  she  had  cried  over  it, 
but  still  there  were  one  or  two  things  which  she 
did  not  quite  understand. 

Upon  this  his  puissance  said  to  her,  as  one  hav 
ing  authority,  "  Knock,  and  it  shall  be  opened  unto 
you.  Any  thing  that  I  can  do  to  help  you  will  be 
most  cheerfully  done.  I  am  always  at  home  to 
the  anxious  inquirer.  I  shall  expect  to  see  you 
soon."  Then,  turning  to  the  mother,  he  added, 
"Verily  the  soil  should  be  often  stirred  round 
young  plants  in  the  Lord." 

A  young  gentleman  by  the  name  of  Fitzsnibbert, 


80  OR  ATONE  BUZZ. 

who  had  been  twirling  his  moustache  behind  an  ad 
joining  pillar,  hearing  this  dialogue,  pulled  in  a  long 
breath,  and  muttered,  as  he  discharged  it,  "  What 
would  I  not  give  for  the  Jovinian  delight  of  convert 
ing  those  belles  ?  I  must  think  seriously  of  enter 
ing  the  ministry."  Malcolm,  who  was  also  in  the 
vicinage,  thought  this  valiant  knight  could  find,  if 
he  tried,  a  more  worthy  occupation  for  his  arms. 

Mrs.  Furblow  was  charmed  by  the  tender  inter 
est  the  eminent  clergyman  took  in  her  "  dears,"  and, 
becoming  confidential,  entertained  him  with  an  ac 
count  of  her  symptoms  ;  for  her  ladyship  suffered 
much  from  that  polite  demon  called  Dyspepsia,  — 
while  the  young  ladies  looked  about,  either  ruminat 
ing  on  the  state  of  their  souls,  or,  what  is  more 
likely,  upon  the  selection  of  their  periodical  silk, 
which  was  suggested  by  the  aspect  of  the  millinery 
of  the  other  "divinities"  around  them. 

Then  the  musical  entertainment  commenced,  and, 
notwithstanding  the  excellence  thereof,  for  it  was 
the  best  the  city  could  afford,  many  who  had  not 
even  opened  their  lips  before  took  this  opportunity 
to  evince  a  remarkable  loquacity.  Mrs.  Furblow 
withdrawn,  his  puissance,  unconsciously  adapting 
himself  to  the  next  on  hand,  a  big,  burly  individual 
with  a  tomahawk  nose  and  a  face  to  match,  cried, 
"  How  goes  it,  Bottleton  ?  This  chilly  spell  is  good 
for  your  business." 

"  Sure  enough,  Lullaby  !  fourteen  thousand,  eight 
hundred  and  eighty-eight  gallons  a  day  of  the  pure 
and  unadulterated.  There  is  something  for  Gough 
to  handle." 


OR  ATONE  BUZZ.  8 1 

"Ah,  I  am  ashamed  of  you,  Brother  Bottleton  ; 
all  that  I  can  say  or  do,  you  won't  give  up  that  dis 
tillery  and  go  in  for  the  Lord.  Come,  now,  be  good. 
You  know  it  is  far  beneath  you,"  he  said  in  per 
suasive  tones,  smiling  the  while.  He  rarely  spoke 
so  authoritatively  on  morality  as  applicable  to  cer 
tain  individuals  as  on  the  tendernes.s  of  the  Deity  ; 
and  he  thought  the  Divine  Love,  as  manifest  in 
fond  personal  sympathy  and  communion  with  others, 
should  be  indulged  in  at  all  hazards,  even  if  some 
of  the  stricter  sentiments  of  the  Sermon  on  the 
Mount  occasionally  suffered  during  the  acts  of  indul 
gence.  What  was  the  Messiah  for,  if  not  to  soften 
the  rigor  of  the  Ten  Commandments  with  the  le 
niency  peculiar  to  him  in  his  mediatorial  capacity 
between  God  and  such  sinners  as  Lullaby  and  his 
constituents  ? 

"  I  don't  know  anything  of  the  kind,  Lullaby," 
cried  Bottleton  with  the  grimmest  of  smiles.  "  My 
spirit  is  just  like  the  Unitarian  God,  perfectly  good 
to  the  temperate,  but  the  Devil  himself  to  the  intem 
perate.  No,  no,  friend,  you  can't  catch  me  there. 
Good  spirits  are  not  to  be  sneered  at.  By  the  way, 
you  like  that  Burgundy  of  mine.  Come  sup  with 
me  to-morrow.  Bungle  will  be  there  ;  and  Buzz 
wants  to  taste  my  Providence."  (Oysters,  it  is  to  be 
hoped). 

"  Thanks,  thanks,  my  friend  ;  but  ah,  so  busy,  you 
see,  —  so  busy.  Let  you  know  to-morrow." 

Malcolm,  meanwhile,  was  busy  wondering  what 
Nebuchadnezzar  would  have  clone  had  the  three 
Jews  said,  "  Now,  Nebuchadnezzar,  we  are  inclined  to 


82  OR  ATONE  BUZZ. 

believe  that  this  new  golden  god  of  yours  is  not  such 
a  good  thing  after  all.  Come,  now,  be  decent,  and 
order  it  to  be  taken  away.  We  will  give  you  a  much 
better  one  in  its  place."  Nebuchadnezzar  was  not 
so  much  to  blame ;  he  believed  in  his  accustomed 
god  until  the  existence  of  a  better  was  practically 
demonstrated  to  him.  Bottleton  actually  felt  that 
his  spirits  were  as  productive  of  good  as  the  one 
whose  operation  he  saw  around  him,  and  he  spoke 
from  his  heart.  The  soil  does  not  require  to  be 
stirred  round  those  old  plants  in  the  Lord,  —  oh, 
no ! 

"  How  are  you,  Brother  Stoppleton  ? "  asked  his 
puissance,  turning  to  a  meek-faced  little  man  who 
looked  as  if  he  rued  the  cost  of  his  religion  more 
than  his  want  of  it  (he  had  just  been  complaining  to 
a  friend  that  it  cost  him  a  thousand  a  year,  and  that, 
had  it  not  been  for  the  wife,  he  would  have  given  it 
up  long  ago).  After  Stoppleton  had  informed  him 
that  he  was  pretty  well,  Dr.  Lullaby  then  asked  how 
that  little  fellow  of  his  was  who  had  been  sick  of  the 
measles,  and  conversed  sympathetically  with  him. 

Dr.  Lullaby  next  caught  the  eye  of  a  handsome, 
elegantly  dressed,  middle-aged  man,  with  long  side 
whiskers,  and  an  air  which  indicated  refinement,  yet 
of  a  sort  rarely  seen  outside  of  certain  galaxies  of 
fashion.  This  person  accosted  his  minister  in  low, 
melodious  tones,  —  indeed,  in  tones  so  melodious 
that  even  Dr.  Lullaby's  seemed  momentarily  sur 
passed.  "Aw,  my  dear  Lullaby,"  he  began,  affec 
tionately  stroking  his  pet  whisker,  "  you  look  jaded, 
—  the  fault,  possibly,  of  your  lecture  yester  eve." 


OR  A  TONE  BUZZ.  83 

"  Do  I,  Mr.  Tulip  ?  But  speaking  rarely  fatigues 
me." 

"  How  fortunate  you  are  ! "  exclaimed  Mr.  Tulip, 
with  a  look  of  admiration.  "  You  must  have  an 
enviable  system.  Indeed,  your  quiet  candor,  inter 
woven  as  it  ever  is  with  extreme  geniality  of  senti 
ment,  can  only  come  from  a  sound  constitution,  per 
vaded  by  a  Christian  spirit.  And  your  success  as 
a  thinker,  also,  considering  the  demands  of  society 
on  your  time,  and  your  unflagging  attention  to  the 
afflicted,  has  far  exceeded  the  hopes  of  your  flock." 

"  Do  not,  I  beg  of  you,  exaggerate  my  small  abil 
ity  :  I  have  but  poorly  done  the  little  task  appointed 
me,  although,  to  be  sure,  the  vast  spread  of  infidelity 
which  attended  the  preaching  of  Theodore  Parker 
has  taxed  my  energies  to  the  utmost.  Before  him, 
hardly  any  one  dared  to  doubt  the  letter  of  Revela 
tion.  But  now,  alas  !  not  a  day  passes  without  an 
alarm  peal  from  the  Church  tower,  calling  us  to 
arms.  And  so  wily  and  daring  —  so  very  wily  and 
daring  —  is  the  foe,  that  we  experience  some  diffi 
culty  in  locating  and  keeping  a  fixed  line  of  defense. 
The  radicalism  of  the  day,  not  content  with  can 
nonading  the  Church,  actually  threatens  to  abolish 
the  State,  —  yes,  Mr.  Tulip,  to  abolish  the  State, 
and  give  us  up  to  the  unbridled  license  of  the  vul 
gar." 

"Frightful,  frightful!"  exclaimed  Mr.  Tulip,  turn 
ing  pale,  and  nervously  catching  the  end  of  a  whisk 
er  reaching  to  his  vest  pocket.  "  But  you  may  ex 
aggerate  'the  evil,  Dr.  Lullaby.  I  take  comfort  in 
the  thought '  that  even  among  the  radicals  there  are 


84  OR  ATONE  BUZZ. 

a  few  tender  and  beautiful  spirits  which  must,  in  a 
large  degree,  atone  for  the  unfeeling  and  flippant 
character  of  many.  To  satisfy  a  pardonable  curi 
osity,  I  went  to  one  of  their  gatherings,  —  the  most 
select,  you  know,  —  and  was  surprised  at  the  pious 
tone  of  the  discussion.  Although  nominally  anti- 
Christian,  much  of  the  conversation  was  essentially 
correct,  and  I  was  greatly  pleased  with  it.  Now, 
if  such  a  truly  spiritual  reaction  as  this,  Dr.  Lullaby, 
is  going  to  succeed  the  bitter  infidelity  of  Theodore 
Parker,  and  counteract  the  demoniac  wit  of  John 
Know,  the  Church  has  little  to  fear  from  radicals." 

"  I  agree  with  you  quite.  I  admire  piety  even  in 
a  radical,  and  deem  it  good  for  our  cause  that  such 
characters  as  you  first  mentioned  should  rise  to 
leaven  the  coarse  matter  of  infidelity.  It  will 
greatly  facilitate  our  victory.  But  beware,  Mr. 
Tulip,  beware  of  giving  your  confidence  too  rash 
ly,  of  opening  your  heart  too  freely,  to  any  of  those 
who  bear  a  name  so  suggestive  of  unfaithfulness  to 
the  Lamb,  so  repugnant  to  him  who  has  suffered  for 
his  ungrateful  children.  Christianity,  in  this  hour 
of  peril,  expects  every  man  to  do  his  duty." 

"  Yes,  Doctor,"  replied  Mr.  Tulip,  with  a  sigh, 
relinquishing  the  whisker.  "  It  is  well  to  avoid 
even  the  appearance  of  sin." 

On  this  they  both  sauntered  in  to  supper. 

What  a  magnificent  table  lay  spread  before  the 
hungry  throng,  or  the  throng  that  was  supposed  to 
be  hungry  !  Decalcomino  had  done  his  utmost  for 
the  faithful  few.  What  a  brilliant  array  of  varie 
gated  ice-creams !  what  a  phalanx  of  oysters,  seal- 


OR  ATONE  BUZZ.  8$ 

loped,  fried,  and  broiled,  entrenched  by  lofty  tureens 
of  chicken  salad,  and  commanded  by  pyramids  of 
the  most  inviting  cake  !  "  Oh,  my  !  "  as  a  young 
school-marm,  who  had  come  to  the  feast  as  the 
guest  of  a  rich  friend,  exclaimed  to  her  frosty-nosed 
little  brethren  at  home,  "it  was  perfectly  splendid! 
It  gives  me  a  sick-headache  to  think  of  it."  What 
a  clatter  of  knives,  forks,  spoons,  and  plates,  and 
what  a  spreading  of  napkins  !  what  a  display  of  de 
voted  attention  on  the  part  of  the  males !  and  what 
sweet  nonchalance  visible  on  the  faces  of  the  fe 
males  ! 

"  This  is  far  beyond  Knox's  Presbyterianism  ! "  ex 
claimed  Malcolm,  bringing  to  mind  the  frigid  tea 
and  coarse  oat-cake  he  had  enjoyed  at  the  soirees  of 
his  former  kirk.  "But  somehow,"  he  mused,  "the 
Hubertonians  do  not  seem  a  great  deal  better  for 
the  greater  prodigality  of  Providence  with  the  aid 
of  Decalcomino  in  their  behalf.  These  young  ladies 
are  not  so  stout  and  healthy  as  my  old  friends  on 
the  other  side.  Those  hot  furnaces,  those  horse- 
cars  and  carriages,  are  not  conducive  to  strength  of 
limb,  and  this  luxurious  fare  to  strength  of  diges 
tion.  Yet,  upon  the  whole,  I  like  the  heads  and 
faces  of  these  girls  better  than  those  of  the  Darkly  n  ; 
and  how  much  better  their  manners  are !  Still 
there  is  a  lack  of  vitality  about  them  that  I  do  not 
understand  :  they  do  not  enjoy  life  so  much  as  they 
might  be  made  to.  I  wish  folk  were  more  faithful  to 
the  Hebrew  religion,  and  paid  attention  to  that  of 
the  Greeks.  How  much  better  balanced  the  cul 
ture  of  the  latter !  They  gave  as  much  attention  to 


86  OR  ATONE  BUZZ. 

the  body  as  they  did  to  the  mind.  Hence  the  won 
derful  harmony  visible  in  all  their  productions. 
Christianity  has  been  comparatively  one-sided.  It 
has  made  the  flesh  the  home  of  the  Devil  and  his 
angels,  and  treated  it  as  such  even  unto  this  even 
ing," —  and  he  looked  upon  the  pious  throng  as  it 
precipitated  itself  upon  the  indigestible,  and  in  sur 
feiting  itself  therewith,  sowed  the  seeds  of  future 
distress. 

Even  Mrs.  Furblow  forgot  her  symptoms,  and  her 
dear  girls  the  amount  of  Christ  they  had  in  their 
souls,  and  joined  in  the  attack  on  the  viands.  But 
what  does  it  matter  about  a  nightmare  or  two  or 
about  a  slight  inactivity  of  the  liver,  as  long  as  one 
is  possessed  of  the  sweet  consciousness  of  being  on 
the  road  to  salvation  ?  We  would  like  a  sermon 
for  a  change  on  the  text  that  the  kingdom  of 
Hell  is  a  mustard-seed  as  well  as  that  of  Heaven. 
Our  experience  teaches  us  that  both  have  their  root 
in  the  same  being,  and  are  equally  susceptible  of 
cultivation,  the  one  of  becoming  the  tree  of  Life,  and 
the  other  the  tree  of  Death.  There  is  some  truth  in 
what  Pluffle  said,  after  all,  "  A  serious  hour  in  the 
midst  of  gaiety  does  not  always  come  amiss." 

Good  night 


BOOK    II. 


RAINBOW    AND    REALITY. 


(8?) 


I. 

DEACON    CRISP  AND    HIS   DEVIL. 

U  T  AM  glad  to  say,  Brother  Pluffle,"  said  Mr. 
JL  Crisp,  on  his  return  home  from  Huberton, 
"  that  Lawson  begins  to  grow  decidedly  Christian." 

"Well,  Deacon  Crisp,  perhaps  you  were  right 
about  him,  after  all.  But,  if  I  may  speak  my  mind, 
I  must  repeat  that  there  is  a  nameless  something  in 
him  that  grates  a  little  on  my  nerves.  It  is  not 
irreverence,  nor  is  it  downright  impiety,  but  evi 
dently  a  positive  want,  or,  at  all  events,  something 
quite  out  of  the  way.  You  said,  if  I  remember 
aright,  that  his  prayers  were  poor." 

"  Oh,  you  are  too  hard  to  please,  Pluffle.  Young 
men  will  be  young  men,  and  Malcolm  is  wonderful, 
considering  that  he  is  entirely  self-taught.  You 
cannot  expect  him  to  acquire  at  once  that  Chris 
tian  sweetness  and  serene  dignity  which  even  the 
best  of  us  sometimes  lack.  'Tis  true,  I  was  ex 
tremely  sorry  that  he  did  not  incline  to  prayer  ;  but 
that  note  of  Lullaby's  reassures  me,  and  I  do  most 
sincerely  hope  he  will  give  us  no  more  trouble  on 
that  score." 

"  Yes,  brother,  it  behooveth  us  to  have  faith.  But 
for  my  part "  — 

"  Is  there  no  end  to  these'buts'of  yours,  Pluffle  ? " 

"  Excuse  me,  sir :  I  was  about  to  say,  that,  since 

(88) 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


89 


my  interests  are  yours,  I  would  feel  more  at  ease  in 
regard  to  Mr.  Lawson  if  Tightcreed  and  Graves  were 
as  favorable  to  him  as  Lullaby,  who,  I  grieve  to  ob 
serve,  displays  a  marked  regard  for  Universalism, 
manifesting  itself  in  a  shocking  leniency  to  Radi 
calism,  that  insidious  Infidelity  already  become  so 
fashionable  in  Upper  Peanut  and  Special  Culture 
Streets." 

"  You  astonish  me  :  I  thought  Lullaby  was  quite 
sound." 

"  Well,  so  do  many."  Here  Pluffle  looked  very 
mysterious.  "  But  faithful  adherence  to  the  Word 
often  compels  us  to  differ  from  the  crowd.  How 
ever,  I  only  give  you  my  opinion  of  the  man,  and 
let  it  go  at  that.  Doctors  will  differ,  you  know,  and 
the  best  of  us  are  liable  to  misapprehension.  Rest 
assured,  if  I  did  not  esteem  it  a  pastoral  duty  to 
have  an  eye  on  the  possible  foes  of  our  own  house 
hold,  I  would  not  bring  so  influential  a  personage 
into  question." 

"  Your  eye  is  very  sharp,"  said  Crisp. 

"  Far  be  it  from  me  to  say  aught  against  Dr.  Lul 
laby  as  a  well-meaning  gentleman  ;  but,  alas  !  Infi 
delity  nowadays  is  so  insidious  in  its  attacks  on  the 
heart  that  I  am  constantly  dreading  a  surprise, — 
yes,  Brother  Crisp,  a  surprise.  We  may  consider 
ourselves  in  a  state  of  siege,  and  Dr.  Lullaby,  you 
know,  has  but  recently  entered  the  walls  of  our 
denomination,  whereas  Graves  and  Tightcreed  are 
old  and  tried  friends,  who  bid  fair  to  control  the 
destinies  of  the  country." 

"  There  may  be  some  sense  in  that,  Pluffle.     But 


C/D  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

how  is  it  that  you,  who  are  so  sound  yourself,  should 
prefer  those  men  to  Lullaby  ?  He  is  quite  equal  to 
them.  I  have  always  thought  myself  a  pretty  good 
judge,  and  my  experience  is  that  ministers  are  not 
unlike  horses :  I  have  yet  to  find  one  that  is  per 
fectly  kind  and  sound."  And  the  deacon  chuckled 
over  his  own  wit. 

"  Well,  I  suppose,"  said  Pluffle,  smiling  grimly, 
"that  your  judgment  is  fully  equal  to  mine.  But" — 

"Oh,  those 'buts,' Pluffle." 

"  Deacon  Crisp,  if  you  intend  to  insult  me,  you 
certainly  succeed." 

"  Pardon  me,  brother  :  I  will  be  more  careful." 

"This  treatment  is  altogether  unexpected  from 
you,  sir.  A  trusted  pastor  who  opens  his  heart  to 
one  of  his  flock  ought  not  to  be  sneered  at  in  this 
way." 

"  Perhaps  I'm  wrong,  Pluffle :  but,  believe  me,  the 
possible  treachery  of  a  Lullaby  is  nothing  at  all 
beside  the  wanton  Infidelity  of  the  masses  and  the 
shameless  wickedness  of  the  country.  That  is  what 
appalls  me ;  and  how  to  put  a  stop  to  it  exercises  me 
night  and  day.  Now,  if  you  can  help  me  there,  I 
will  be  much  obliged." 

"That  is  just  what  exercises  me,  also,"  cried  Pluf 
fle  enthusiastically.  "  It  has  cost  me  endless  prayer 
and  many  a  sleepless  night.  Let  us  prepare  for  im 
mediate  descent  on  the  Enemy.  He  occupies  the 
theatres,  and  there  is  where  the  decisive  battle  for 
Christ  must  be  fought.  Once  possessed  of  that 
stronghold  of  Satan,  we  will  turn  the  fire  of  his 
great  guns  against  himself,  and  he  shall  yield  to  the 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  gi 

lightnings  of  the  Lord.  '  Gospel  for  the  poor  !  Gos 
pel  for  the  masses  ! '  Let  .that  be  our  watchword 
and  battle-cry." 

This  speech  went  to  the  deacon's  heart,  and  he 
shook  Pluffle's  hand,  asking  pardon  for  his  momen 
tary  aberration. 

Next  Sunday  Malcolm  went  to  the  Huberton 
Theatre,  and  found  it  occupied  by  the  advanced 
guard  of  Christianity.  But  there  was  no  enemy 
to  meet  it,  for  the  rich  admirers  of  the  knights, 
who  fought  the  devils  underneath,  obtained  the  best 
seats,  so  that  the  "poor"  had  to  go  off  and  break 
the  Sabbath  elsewhere,  or  sit  as  near  "  the  gods  "  as 
possible,  —  namely,  within  an  inch  of  the  roof. 


II. 

THE  NOISELESS   STRUGGLE. 

WHO  are  the  genuine  fighters  of  the  Fiend  ? 
Numerous  ghosts  fill  the  room  in  reply,  and 
we  cannot  away  from  the  piteous  spectacle.  "  O 
mother,  with  the  sunken  eyes  and  the  dark  rims 
round  them,  thrice  waked  out  of  thy  deep  sleep  to 
tend  the  suffering  babe  that  vice  or  other  incapacity 
has  foisted  upon  thee !  O  toiler  of  the  deep,  who 
hast  just  left  the  skin  of  thy  horny  palm  on  the 
frozen  rigging  aloft,  and  now  gropest  thy  way  to  thy 
dark  and  noisome  recess  below !  O  thief  of  the 
night,  and  even  thou,  O  woman  of  the  town,  who 
this  moment  takest  thy  doleful  walk  in  the  drizzling 
rain  !  and  all  ye  who  seek,  and  perhaps  vainly,  to 
burrow  your  way  out  of  the  Bastiles  wherein  your 
own  follies,  or  those  of  society  have  pent  you  up !  it 
is  you  that  fight  with  the  Fiend.  But  who  is  there 
to  sing  your  victories,  and  encourage  you  to  perse 
vere  ?  What  is  called  your  filth  is  often  your  sweet 
ness,  and  ye  perish  in  it  for  the  luxury  of  others, 
like  bees,  or  like  the  young  trees  that,  being  over 
shadowed  by  a  more  vigorous  growth,  wither  and  rot 
that  the  latter  may  live  the  better.  To  you  we  owe, 
for  aught  we  know,  as  deep  a  debt  of  gratitude  as  we 
do  to  our  prophets  and  bards  ;  and  shall  we  content 

(92) 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  93 

ourselves  with  beating  the  air  for  other's  amusement, 
or  wasting  the  paper  on  which  we  write  ? 

Gospel  for  the  poor !  Mrs.  Winslow's  Soothing 
Syrup  for  the  poor,  or  some  such  ready-made  con 
venient  decoction,  instead  of  our  lives,  instead  of 
hard,  genuine  work  in  their  behalf,  in  short,  tall 
talk  about  Christ,  instead  of  being  Christs  our 
selves.  Be  little  Christs,  exhorts  a  great  preacher.* 
No :  be  great  ones,  is  the  constant  cry  of  the  soul, 
as  it  bids  us  see  the  possibility  of  that  being  in  the 
history  of  our  kind,  or  bids  the  trees  of  the  forest 
teach  it  to  us  ;  for  the  perennial  fall  of  their  fruits 
and  of  their  leaves,  and  lastly  themselves,  go  to  en 
rich  the  soil  that  is  the  commonwealth  of  their  kind. 
To-morrow  we  may  die,  and  leave  our  little  ones  to 
the  world  and  its  mercies  ;  the  better  we  have  treated 
it,  the  better  able  it  to  take  care  of  them.  Let  this 
thought,  if  so  be  that  we  love  not  the  Truth  for 
the  sake  of  itself,  move  us  to  be  up  and  doing,  — 
doing  while  it  is  yet  day ;  "  for  the  night  cometh 
when  no  man  can  work." 

*  "Be  little  Christs,  if  I  may  say  so,"  was  the  cautious 
advice  of  a  distinguished  lecturer  on  preaching  to  the  stu 
dents  at  Yale.  (Yale  Lecturing  on  Preaching,  by  Beecher, 
p.  66.) 


III. 

HIS   FRIEND    SHAFT. 

MALCOLM  saw  at  a  glance  that  every  person 
must  answer  for  himself  the  great  questions 
of  Science  and  Religion.  "  For  my  part,"  he  said, 
"  I  see  nothing  but  mystery  and  mystery  in  this 
world,  and  do  what  I  will,  I  cannot  escape  the  con 
viction  that  I  am  immortal.  It  is  true  that  I  a-m 
wretchedly  ignorant,  but,  strange  to  say,  nobody  tells 
me  anything  that  I  do  not  know  already,  except  facts 
of  observation  and  experience,  about  which  it  is  not 
worth  while  to  dispute.  But  in  regard  to  gods  we 
have  nothing  but  myth  and  tradition,  and,  to  be 
frank,  I  think,  if  I  put  my  mind  to  it,  I  could  tell 
some  pretty  big  stories  myself.  Still,  there  are 
quite  enough  of  them  already,  and  no  doubt  in  the 
hands  of  the  Truthful  they  will  make  the  best  illus 
trations  of  Eternal  Wisdom." 

But  what  was  Brother  Crisp  to  say  to  this  radical 
effusion  ?  Malcolm  did  not  realize  his  circumstances 
till  the  theatre  preaching  took  place,  and  then  the 
struggle  between  his  conscience  or  reason  and  his 
desire  for  immediate  individual  gratification  com 
menced.  But  he  still  remained  the  docile  pupil,  seiz 
ing  with  avidity,  and  arranging  intuitively,  the  facts 
that  came  to  hand.  It  was  hard,  indeed,  for  him, 
as  will  be  seen  hereafter,  to  overlook  the  brilliant 

(94)     ' 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


95 


prospects  Mr.  Crisp  had  painted  for  him.  But  Truth 
was  on  his  side,  although  we  are  sorry  to  say  it  did 
riot  prevail  so  much  at  first.  Had  he  been  pleased 
to  subordinate  it,  he  might  have  become  a  member 
of  the  circus  company  aforesaid,  and  thus  made  him 
self  most  acceptable  to  his  patron.  For  the  moment 
he  was  only  astonished  at  the  above  phenomenon. 

About  this  time  he  was  introduced  to  a  person  by 
the  name  of  Shaft.  This  was  a  man  about  forty 
years  old,  who  was  noted  for  his  somewhat  eccen 
tric  yet  very  radical  views.  Amused  by  the  charac 
ter  of  Malcolm's  humor,  which  had  a  certain  resem 
blance  to  his  own,  he  deigned  to  make  his  acquaint 
ance. 

Peter  Shaft  lived  alone  in  the  topmost  story  of  a 
lofty  house,  in  unpleasant  proximity  to  a  tarred  roof 
and  sundry  organ  grinders  whose  serenades  he  loved 
to  interrupt.  Nobody  knew  whether  he  were  rich 
or  poor,  or  how  he  contrived  to  exist.  He  was  sup 
posed,  however,  to  be  "  pretty  well  off,"  as  he  evi 
dently  had  enough  to  live  without  working  for  the 
sake  of  money,  —  and  a  little  to  give  away. 

Although  he  possessed  the  reputation  of  great 
literary  talent,  and,  on  account  of  his  critical  acu 
men,  was  often  consulted  by  young  authors,  nobody 
had  seen  any  of  his  writings,  —  that  is,  if  he  had 
ever  been  weak  enough  to  indulge  in  the  luxury  of 
expressing  himself  on  paper.  For  it  really  is  a 
luxury  to  write,  as  soon  as  the  habit  is  formed  ; 
and  few  can  afford  it.  It  is  almost  as  pleasant  as 
preaching,  however  good  the  voice  of  the  aspiring 
evangelist,  —  but  nothing  like  as  pleasant  as  pray- 


96  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

ing.  "  For,"  as  a  friend  of  ours  lately  told  us,  "  far 
from  having  any  difficulty  in  praying,  it  is  the 
hardest  thing  in  the  world  for  me  to  stop  after  I 
have  once  fairly  begun."  Now  as  we  can  on  a  pinch 
lay  aside  the  pen,  we  must  grant  that  praying  is  the 
pleasanter  occupation  of  the  two.  The  habit  of 
writing  is  apt  to  grow  upon  one  like  tobacco  smok 
ing,  and  ought  to  be  kept  in  check.  We  certainly 
know  such  to  be  the  case  with  talking,  whether 
within  or  without  the  doors  of  the  Church.  "  Did 
you  ever  hear  me  preach  ? "  asked  Coleridge  of 
Lamb.  "  I  never  heard  you  do  anything  else,"  was 
the  immediate  response.  Joking  aside,  how  happy 
those  must  be  who  get  thousands  and  thousands 
per  annum  for  indulging  in  their  favorite  propensi 
ties  !  Says  Patrick,  "  It  beats  Banagher,  and  Bana- 
gher  beats  the  Divil." 

Mr.  Shaft  knew  his  weakness,  and  stood  as  clear 
of  the  pen,  as  regard  for  his  uncommon  philosophical 
idea  would  permit  him.  Therefore  his  genius,  if  he 
had  such  a  troublesome  thing,  had  to  content  itself 
with  speech  when  he  happened,  which  was  not 
often,  to  find  a  suitable  victim.  Then  it  would  be 
poured  forth  with  so  much  vehemence  and  power 
that  the  astonished  individual  that  had  invoked  it 
would  feel  like  the  grocery  clerk,  who,  having 
given  a  strong  twitch  to  the  string  in  the  tin 
bottle  on  the  counter,  pulls  out  yards  more  than 
he  can  use. 

He  was  a  tall,  meagre  individual,  with  a  slight 
cast  in  his  deep  hazel  eyes.  For  the  rest,  he  did 
not  differ  much  in  appearance  from  the  rest  of 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


97 


his  kind,  save  in  having  on  each  side  of  his  some 
what  wide  mouth  a  singular  network  of  dimples, 
which  was  evidently  the  result  of  indulgence  in 
hearty  laughter.  Yes,  notwithstanding  his  absorb 
ing  appreciation  of  the  sublime,  Mr.  Shaft  was 
remarkably  fond  of  good  jokes,  and  was  not  above 
the  invention  of  the  same.  Nor  did  he,  in  the 
absence  of  sympathizing  friends,  fail  to  laugh  at 
them  himself,  especially  when  entirely  alone.  So 
radically  eccentric  was  he  in  this,  that  his  neighbors 
entertained  serious  doubts  concerning  his  perfect 
sanity.  In  the  middle  of  the  night  they  were  often 
startled  by  the  singular  sounds  emanating  from  his 
solitary  apartment. 

Strange  to  say,  in  view  of  the  above,  Mr.  Shaft 
had  been  very  unfortunate.  He  lost  his  wife  and 
two  beautiful  children  by  railway  accident  some 
years  before  this  time.  People  wondered  at  the  sto 
icism  he  evinced  under  this  affliction,  and  some  gave 
him  the  credit  of  being  hard-hearted.  But  we  knew 
better.  He  loved  Eternal  Truth,  and  subordinated 
all  other  loves  to  the  love  of  it.  Hence  he  was 
always  cheerful.  Speaking  of  his  bereavement,  he 
said,  "  I  can  realize  how  Jesus  felt  when  he  said, 
'  Who  is  my  mother,  and  who  are  my  brethren  ? ' 
I  seek  to  be  worthy  of  a  similar  family,  —  namely, 
that  of  the  obedient  to  the  laws  of  nature  or  of  God. 
I  do  not  care  which  of  the  two  words  you  use." 

"  Why,"  said  we,  "  that's  Pantheism  ! " 

"  Call  it  anything  you  like,"  he  replied.  "  To  me 
it  is  a  positive  increase  of  Life." 

Therefore  Mr.  Shaft  was  a  happy  man,  and  lived 


98 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


on,  doing  his  best  for  himself  and  others.  Malcolm 
entered  his  room  one  day,  and  informed  him  that  he 
could  not  accept  the  doctrine  of  Vicarious  Atone 
ment,  as  given  him  by  his  teachers. 

"  That  is  unfortunate,"  rejoined  Shaft,  smiling. 
"What  is  the  difficulty?" 

"  I  cannot  reconcile  it  with  Nature's  method  of 
compensation,  according  to  which  every  sin  involves 
certain  punishment,  and  every  act  of  virtue  suffi 
cient  reward.  Sin  is  a  fire,  and  there  is  no  salva 
tion  for  the  burned,  however  great  the  past  effort 
of  God  to  save  us,  unless  it  be  in  such  realization 
of  the  badness  of  sin  that  we  fly  from  it  in  horror." 

"  True,  in  the  main,"  said  Mr.  Shaft.  "  But  be 
fore  we  venture  to  discuss  this  formidable  doctrine 
of  yours,  let  us  come  to  some  understanding  in 
regard  to  our  relative  positions,  in  order  that  we 
may  avoid  unprofitable  antagonism.  You,  as  an 
orthodox  student,  conceive  Christ  to  be  God,  either 
in  deference  to  the  dictates  of  your  >wn  Reason,  or 
to  those  of  the  spirit  of  Authority  and  Tradition. 
Yet,  be  this  as  it  may,  you  will  be  content,  for  the 
time  being  at  least,  to  turn  away  from  the  latter 
that  you  may  better  hearken  to  the  former." 

"  I  have  no  difficulty  in  so  doing,"  said  the  youth. 

"  So  much  the  better,"  said  Mr.  Shaft,  with  in 
creased  stateliness  of  tone.  "  Now,  then,  the  foun 
dation  of  a  profitable  conversation  being  laid,  it  is 
well  to  remember  that,  inasmuch  as  you  and  I  have 
had  different  experiences  of  life,  we  must  of  neces 
sity  see  things  from  different  stand-points.  If,  for 
instance,  you  stood  upon  a  pinnacle  of  the  Temple 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


99 


of  Knowledge,  you  would  see  immeasurably  more 
than  if  you  stood  only  at  the  porch.  Suppose,  now, 
a  person  who  had  led  a  pure  and  holy  life  in  a  world 
much  superior  to  this,  in  point  of  moral  culture, 
chanced  to  light  on  the  earth,  would  he  not  —  so 
great  were  the  contrast  between  the  two  spheres  — 
think  himself  in  Hell  ?  " 

"  Yes,  if  he  were  not  too  much  of  an  optimist. 
But  to  be  quite  frank,  Mr.  Shaft,  I  am  not  in  a 
decided  state  about  anything.  My  imagination 
gives  me  no  peace,  and,  flying  over  all  creation 
with  me,  seems  bent  on  dashing  out  my  brains 
against  the  moons  of  Metaphysics.  Your  com 
posure,  however,  gives  me  a  moment  of  rest,  and 
I  am  glad  to  listen." 

"  Well,  in  regard  to  vicarious  sacrifice,  let  us  look 
as  deeply  as  we  can  into  that  most  suggestive  idea. 
You  alluded,  in  the  first  place,  to  the  past  effort  of 
God  to  save  us.  Now  that  is  partial.  The  effort 
of  God  always  is,  and  it  consists,  we  may  say,  in  his 
enabling  us  to  make  the  realization  you  specified. 
Most  people  dwell  wholly  in  the  dark,  and  only 
occasionally  catch  a  glimpse  of  the  Kingdom  of 
Light.  And  the  Son  of  Man,  who  appears  like  a 
flash  of  lightning,  illuminating  the  world  from  one 
end  to  the  other,  is  a  ray  from  that  Kingdom.  In 
contemplating  the  character  of  that  ray,  and  in 
looking  at  my  world  in  the  light  afforded  by  it,  I 
see  that  God  appears  to  suffer  for  the  wicked." 

"  Appears  to  suffer,  you  say.  How  can  you,  a 
radical,  connect  the  thought  of  suffering  with  the 
Divine  Person  ? " 


100  RAINBOW  AND   REALITY. 

"  Have  patience.  I  am  more  orthodox  than  you, 
although  I  am  not  the  hired  advocate  of  a  sect. 
See  here :  if  there  are  Infinite  Holiness  and  Health 
in  the  universe,  do  these  not  seem  to  be  accompa 
nied  by  Infinite  Sickness  and  Distress  ?" 

"  Yes." 

"  Well,  shall  not  the  Divine  Person  be  the  Lord 
and  Master  over  the  Kingdom  of  Hell  as  well  as 
over  that  of  Heaven  ? " 

"  Certainly." 

"  To  this  end,  then,  he  specially  manifests  him 
self  in  the  person  of  Jesus  of  Nazareth,  in  order  to 
establish  his  government  of  Love  over  the  still  wild 
country  of  Sin  and  Death." 

"  And  not  over  the  Strength  and  Beauty  of  the 
universe  ? " 

"  No  :  for  his  beneficial  rule  has  been  already 
acknowledged  by  the  true  genius  of  all  past  time 
in  philosophy  and  in  art,  in  agriculture  and  in  me 
chanics,  in  the  freedom  of  our  Scandinavian  ances 
tors,  and  in  the  reverent  worship  of  the  Hebrews. 
In  short,  Jesus  comes  to  call  sinners,  not  the  right 
eous,  to  repentance." 

"  Positively,  you  are  more  orthodox  than  Dr.  Buzz 
himself.  But  why  should  the  manifestation  of  God 
be  special  in  the  case  of  Jesus,  and  not  so  in  mine?" 

"  I  do  not  say  that  it  is  not  special  in  yours.  If, 
according  to  Calvin,  there  is  no  good  in  us  save 
what  we  receive  by  the  grace  of  God,  I  should  cer 
tainly  say  that  goodness  in  you  is  the  same  as  it 
is  in  Jesus.  But  I  am  more  orthodox  than  Calvin. 
God  suffers  for  the  sins  of  the  world  in  so  far  as  he, 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  IOi 

being  Infinite  Love,  sympathizes  with  all  persons 
and  things  in  their  efforts  to  improve  themselves 
and  others.  '  I  and  my  Father  are  one,'  are  the 
grandest  words  ever  uttered  by  him.  Many  peo 
ple  receive  the  impression  that  Jesus  was  a  very 
unhappy  person.  But,  far  from  thinking  that,  he 
himself  exclaims  on  his  way  to  Calvary,  '  Weep  not 
for  me,  daughters  of  Jerusalem,  but  for  yourselves 
and  your  children.  For  if  they  do  these  things 
unto  a  green  tree,  what  shall  be  done  to  a  dry?' 
Now  while  I  grant,  with  Novalis,  that  there  is  Infi 
nite  Melancholy  in  religion,  I  know  that  it  contains 
Infinite  Joy.  How  can  the  enthusiastic  worship  of 
Truth  be  other  than  the  most  blessed  thing  con 
ceivable  ?  Therefore,  in  the  better  sense  of  the 
word  Self,  Jesus  was  anything  but  a  self-sacrificing 
man.  Who  would  not  gladly  give  the  shadow  for 
the  reality,  the  inferior  for  the  superior?  or  who 
would  not  perish  like  a  dry  acorn  for  the  sake 
of  becoming  a  green  oak  ?  or,  as  illustrated, 
also,  in  the  parable  of  the  talents,  who  would  not 
use  his  money  for  the  sake  of  increase  ?  Thus 
Jesus,  it  is  plain,  lost  his  life  to  save  it,  even  in 
this  world  ;  for  what  are  Time  and  Space  to  the 
Divine  Person  ? " 

Malcolm  hoped  that  they  were  not  quite  useless. 
And  Mr.  Shaft  continued,  in  still  statelier  tones : 
"  Now  if  Jesus,  while  on  earth,  remained  perfectly 
true  to  himself,  —  so  true,  indeed,  that  he  did  not 
require,  as  did  the  prodigal  son,  to  come  to  himself 
before  he  could  return  to  his  Father,  —  his  cru 
cifixion  —  had  it  not  been  for  the  ghastly  spectacle 


102  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

which  made  him  cry  out,  '  Father,  forgive  them, 
they  know  not  what  they  do ! '  —  must  have  been 
the  crowning  joy  of  his  life,  the  consummation  of  his 
heavenly  task,  although,  in  reality,  it  may  only  have 
been  the  burning  of  the  ship  which  brought  him 
to  another  world  infinitely  more  worth  conquering 
than  this." 

"  According  to  you,  then,  it  is  impossible  for  one 
to  die  for  the  world's  good." 

"  Quite,  unless  he  is  a  rascal,  a  mere  body,  so 
given  to  the  love  of  pleasure  that  he  will  not  strive 
for  anything  higher.  For  God,  as  manifest  in  any 
person,  is  there  for  the  sole  purpose  of  conquering 
Sin  and  Death  for  his  own  Re-creation,  the  renew 
ing  or  regeneration  of  those  individuals  who  love 
and  suffer  with  him  for  the  good  of  others ;  and 
in  so  far  as  those  individuals  succeed  in  helping 
others,  the  world  through  them  becomes  more  sat 
isfactory  to  God.  Such,  then,  is  the  Atonement,  as 
seen  in  the  light  of  Jesus'  life.  Death,  says  Fichte, 
is  nothing,  existing  only  in  the  dead  gaze  of  the 
dead  beholder.  And  the  suffering  of  the  Divine 
Person  is  chiefly  the  infinite  compassion  inspired  by 
the  disorder  and  distress  which  he,  as  represented 
not  only  by  the  wonderful  Nazarene,  but  by  every 
other  honest  person,  comes  to  lessen  and  alleviate  ; 
and  so  infinite  is  this  sympathy,  that  it  reaches  even 
the  worst  denizens  of  Hell." 

"  Hell ! " 

"Yes:  because  all  below  Divinity  is  Hell,  and  the 
loving  kindness  of  God  is  infinite.  Nor  sparrow  nor 
hawk  falleth  to  the  ground  without  his  sanction.  Sa- 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


103 


tan  himself  is  only  a  fallen  angel ;  and  what,  pray, 
are  you  and  I  ?  Have  we  not  fallen  ? " 

So  weird  was  the  expression  of  his  friend's  eye, 
that  Malcolm  shrank  from  the  question,  and  replied 
with  another :  "  But  how  do  you  reconcile  God's 
love  for  Devils  with  Jesus'  hatred  for  Pharisees  ? " 

"  He  regarded  them  as  quite  dead,  —  so  dead  that 
he  only  introduced  them  into  his  pictures  of  life  as 
so  much  black  paint,  on  the  principle  that  stars 
shine  only  in  the  dark.  And  so  intense  was  his 
realization  of  their  utter  nothingness,  that  he  called 
them  graves,  over  which  one  walked  without  even 
knowing  that  they  were  there." 

"  But  this  is  a  roundabout  way  of  getting  at  the 
truth  of  dead  doctrines." 

"  True.  But  if  those  effete  doctrines  were  once 
alive  with  truth,  their  souls  live  forever." 

"  Yet  the  fault  I  find  with  your  views  is  that  they 
take  away  from  the  reality  of  wretchedness  and  sin, 
since  they  imply  that  these  have  only  a  phenomenal 
existence.  *  For  my  part,  I  agree  with  the  Hebrew 
prophet  in  thinking  it  is  a  fearful  thing  to  be  in  the 
hands  of  the  living  God." 

"If  words  take  me  away  from  reality,  they  always 
bring  me  back.  It  may,  indeed,  be  a  fearful  thing 
for  you  to  be  in  those  hands  ;  but  it  is  far  otherwise 
with  me.  And  as  to  wretchedness  and  woe  having 
only  phenomenal  existence,  why,  even  that  is  too 
much." 

"  You  bring  me  beyond  my  depth.  According  to 
you  all  the  false  doctrines  of  the  Church  may  be 
truths  in  disguise." 


104 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


"Yes  :  therefore,  as  you  value  your  talents,  waste 
them  not  in  the  refutation  of  theological  errors. 
For  these  rest,  as  Goethe  says,  on  the  conviction 
that  the  false  is  true.  Yet,  on  the  other  hand,  since 
it  will  not  do  to  connive  at  falsehood,  let  us  state 
and  keep  stating  what  is  true  for  ourselves,  and  it 
will  be  the  loving  embrace  of  the  morning  of  knowl 
edge.  All  errors  refute  themselves,  even  while  they 
refute  one  another.  And  in  this  way  the  truth  is 
gradually  evolved,  and  every  sect  blends  with  its 
neighbor,  so  that  in  time  reason  and  harmony  take 
the  places  of  discord  and  dissension.  If  names  be 
any  criterion,  the  world  is  perfect ;  for  the  truly 
orthodox  are  truly  liberal,  the  truly  Catholic  truly 
Protestant,  the  truly  radical  truly  conservative,  the 
truly  Christian  truly  religious, —  I  was  going  to  say, 
truly  freely  religious ;  but  double-barreled  adverbs 
are  dangerous." 

"  But  look  at  the  reality,  Mr.  Shaft,  —  my  reality." 
"  I  don't  wish  to  see  it.  However,  to  oblige  you, 
I  will  descend  to  your  level,  and  look  from  the  porch 
of  my  church.  I  am  now  elbowed  by  two  individu 
als,  the  self-styled  liberal  and  the  conscious  church- 
member.  The  latter  is  a  snobbish  aristocrat,  and  the 
former  being  an  ostentatious  parvenu,  ill-feeling  sub 
sists  between  them.  For  my  part,  rather  than  stand 
guard  over  my  privileges  with  a  loaded  pistol  in  my 
hand,  or  keep  offering  them  to  those  who  do  not  wish 
them,  I  would  throw  them  out  the  window.  How 
ever,  I  am  glad  to  see  that  the  aristocrat  is  becom 
ing  less  exclusive,  and  that  the  parvenu,  experien 
cing  the  folly  of  extravagance,  becomes  economical." 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


105 


"  You  bring  to  mind  Drs.  Buzz  and  Lullaby,  who 
have  just  joined  the  I.  S.  N.  D.  The  one  was  a 
close  communionist,  and  the  other  a  liberal  Chris 
tian.  Extremes  meet  in  a  most  unaccountable  man 
ner  in  this  optimistic  age.  But,  by  the  way,  how  do 
you  term  your  system  of  philosophy  ? " 

'•  I  haven't  any." 

"  What,  then,  is  your  aim,  your  purpose  in  Life  ? " 

"  Work." 

"  Nothing  more  ? " 

"  No :  for  that  is  the  only  Heaven  we  gain  in  place 
of  the  one  which  has  been  lost.  There  is  no  rest 
for  the  wicked,  and  the  blessed  see  that  idleness  is 
the  root  of  all  evil.  Are  you  not  happiest  while  en 
gaged  in  some  congenial  pursuit,  or  wrapped  in  ear 
nest  thought  ? " 

"  Certainly.  I  agree  with  you  there.  My  mind 
is  like  the  demon  with  whom  a  Scotch  wizard  made 
a  compact.  This  demon  agreed  to  do  everything 
for  him  on  the  condition  that  he  should  be  supplied 
with  sufficient  work  ;  and  if  the  wizard  failed  to 
keep  him  employed,  he  was  to  be  torn  in  pieces  by 
the  demon.  Absence  of  the  true  ideas  which  com 
pel  us  to  work  for  the  good  of  ourselves,  if  not  for 
that  of  others,  is  the  ruin  of  the  soul,  and  the 
symbol  of  that  ruin  is  deformity.  How  foolish 
some  of  us  are !  I  heard  Dr.  Buzz  say,  in  the 
pulpit,  that  if  he  thought  there  were  no  Heaven 
after  death,  he  would  seek  all  the  pleasures  of 
the  world." 

"  I  am  glad  that  he  has  studied  spiritual  geogra 
phy  to  so  much  advantage.  I  rather  like  him.  He 


I06  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

is  a  good  laugher.  Nor  is  he  a  useless  member 
of  society.  Midas  must  have  his  compensations. 
Moreover,  weathercocks  are  useful,  —  they  are  the 
legitimate  consequences  of  steeples  as  well  as  of 
state-houses."  Here  something  seemed  to  amuse 
Mr.  Shaft  so  that  he  laughed  boisterously,  and  Mal 
colm  joined  in  with  him,  although  he  hardly  knew 
what  he  was  laughing  at.  When  they  had  exhaust 
ed  themselves,  Malcolm  rose  to  go ;  but  Mr.  Shaft 
would  not  let  him  depart  without  taking  with  him 
a  little  essay  that  he  had  just  composed  on  the  har 
binger  of  the  morn,  saying,  as  he  gave  it  to  him, 
"  You  remember  that  when  the  magician  you  al 
luded  to  as  having  pledged  himself  to  the  Evil  One 
found  himself  unable  to  supply  him  with  more 
profitable  work,  he  luckily  thought  to  ask  him  to 
make  ropes  of  sand  long  enough  to  reach  to  the 
moon.  This  request  baffled  the  Fiend  and  saved 
the  warlock  further  anxiety  about  his  future  life. 
Let  us  apply  this  to  ourselves.  The  mind  must  be 
occupied,  and  although  our  writing  and  our  speech 
may  not  amount  to  more  than  a  rope  of  sand,  the 
honest  employment  of  its  energies  to  the  repression 
of  its  ever-surging  restlessness  —  even  if  we  be  re 
duced  to  checkers,  chess,  cards,  definition-making, 
or  other  metaphysical  fopperies  of  the  times  —  is 
our  salvation." 


IV. 

THE  EVERLASTING  PARADOX. 

T   DO  not  care,"  says  Mr.  Sweep, "  for  an  artist 
J-    who  only  makes  a  good  stroke  once   in  a 
while.     No   person    ought   to   draw  unless  he  can 
keep  making  them  all  the  time." 

But,  alas !  Mr.  Sweep's  ideal  is  far  beyond  our 
reach  ;  so  we  must  content  ourselves  with  the  in 
ferior  pen  which  strives  to  illuminate  the  night  of 
these  pages,  in  utter  ignorance  whether  its  attempts 
will  pass  for  stars  or  the  most  abject  candles  possible. 
Yet  why  should  we  concern  ourselves  about  this  ? 
for  having  long  since  passed  the  bounds  Of  good 
sense,  according  to  the  standard  geography  of  that 
region,  those  devout  beings,  profanely  termed  critics, 
who  are  so  full  of  appreciation  of  the  new,  will  be  so 
enraptured  with  the  Romeo  of  this  work,  that,  even 
before  he  dies,  they  will  cut  him  up  into  little  bits, 
and  make  every  bit  a  star,  so  that  people  will  fall  in 
love  with  night,  and  hate  the  day. 

Malcolm  was  so  carried  away  by  the  influx  of 
ideas  which  attended  his  advent  in  Huberton  that 
he  could  no  more  repress  himself  than  if  he  had  a 
heart  as  fiery  as  that  of  Mount  Vesuvius.  Yet  so 
concerned  were  the  guardians  of  the  Faith  about  his 
spiritual  welfare,  that,  not  yet  certain  of  his  good 
intentions,  they  labored  to  ensure  his  thorough  con- 

(107) 


I08  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

version.  But  as  the  reader,  no  doubt,  —  especially 
if  he  is  a  critic,  —  has  himself  experienced  the  agree 
able  process  of  revival,  he  will  not  require  a  demon 
stration  of  the  influences  brought  to  bear  on  this 
young  man.  Omitting,  then,  the  description  of  that 
exciting  experience,  we  shall  relate  how  Malcolm 
endeavored  to  reciprocate  the  concern  of  his  teach 
ers  by  doing  all  he  could  in  their  behalf. 

"  I  like  nothing  better,"  he  said,  "  than  a  warm 
expression  of  sentiment  ;  and,  if  this  is  the  popular 
remedy  for  the  soul,  why  should  it  not  be  equally 
good  for  the  mind  ?  For  my  part,  half  dead  though 
I  am,  I  will  stir  up  the  fires  of  my  heart,  and  cut 
myself  a  passage  through  the  sea  of  theological  con 
fusion.  I  will,  of  course,  be  on  the  lookout  not  to 
collide  with  those  steamers  who  rejoice  in  the  name 
of  the  Lord ;  yet  I  am  bound  to  show  .them  some 
fun." 

Thus  Malcolm,  though  he  may  not  have  carried 
the  sails  of  a  full-rigged  vessel,  had  motive  power  of 
his  own  to  reach  the  haven  of  his  hope. 

"  I  say,  Arthur,"  he  began  one  day,  as  that  indi 
vidual  lay  becalmed  after  a  toilsome  passage  of 
Scripture,  under  the  command  of  Captain  Tight- 
creed,  "  did  it  ever  occur  to  you  that  theology  was  a 
pack  of  cards  ?  " 

"  No  !  "  cried  the  astonished  student.  "  I  guess 
you  mean  your  own  theology." 

"  No  ;  I  mean  that  game  which,  if  well  played  on 
the  magic  table  of  popular  superstition,  will  make 
the  player's  fortune." 

"  And  you  should    avoid,"  replied  Arthur,  "  that 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


109 


game  which,  if  well  played  on  the  boards  of  infi 
delity  and  atheism,  will  cheat  people  out  of  all 
genuine  religious  feeling." 

"  Yet,  how  does  it  happen,  Arthur,  that  the  knights 
of  the  black  cloth  are  so  much  better  off  than  those 
of  the  green  ?  The  bishops  have  thousands  and 
thousands  per  annum,  and  all  the  leading  ones  who 
turn  up  the  trump  heart,  our  Lord,  are  remarkably 
well  off.  To  be  sure,  the  small  fry  of  the  ministry 
do  not  make  a  great  deal ;  yet  neither  do  the  lower 
classes  of  gamblers  and  fortune  tellers.  It  all  de 
pends  upon  the  hand.  Dr.  Lullaby  told  me  his  pen 
was  worth  a  hundred  dollars  an  hour." 

"  That  is  wholly  untrue  ;  for  the  instruction  given 
by  such  as  Lullaby  is  well  worth  the  money,  while 
the  gambler  stirs  up  the  evil  passions  to  no  purpose. 

"I  suppose,"  replied  Malcolm,  "the  Southern  cler 
gymen  did  not  stir  up  the  passions  of  the  rebels  by 
quoting  Scripture  in  favor  of  their  peculiar  institu 
tion.  Nor  am  I  quite  sure  that  most  of  the  Northern 
ones  were  particularly  anxious  to  tone  down  the  nui 
sance.  But  I  will  grant  that,  in  view  of  the  igno 
rance  and  dishonesty  that  abound,  the  metaphor  of 
the  cards  is  a  little  too  strong.  The  plague  of  super 
stition  is  not  the  worst.  Last  night  I  had  rather  a 
strange  vision.  It  contained  a  good  deal." 

"  Let  us  hear  it ! "  said  Arthur,  glad  of  his  victory. 

"  I  dreamed  I  stood  inside  the  gates  of  Heaven, 
speaking  with  an  angel  who  sat  in  a  melancholy 
mood,  jingling  a  bunch  of  rusty  keys.  '  How  is  it,' 
asked  I,  astonished  to  see  the  gates  wide  open,  — 
not  even  ajar,  —  'that  you  have  grown  so  liberal? 


IIO  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

I  thought  you  were  very  particular  in  these  hereti 
cal  times.  I  had  no  idea  that  I,  who  can  pray  so 
poorly,  was  to  find  myself  here.' 

" '  Oh,'  said  he,  smiling,  '  here  there  is  a  per 
petual  reformation  to  correspond  with  the  one  be 
low.  Nothing  but  sheer  ignorance  presumes  that 
we  are  in  any  degree  exclusive.  The  only  difficulty 
is  to  get  people  to  come  this  way  ;  for  the  loudest 
and  most  showy  object  to  the  open  gates,  and  go 
off  elsewhere,  saying,  This  is  no  place  for  the  elect. 
We  cannot  mix  with  the  masses.' " 

"  That's  rather  rough,  Malcolm  ;  yet  I  suppose 
the  Lord  cannot  dispense  with  the  best  souls,  even 
if  they  are  tainted  a  little  by  heresy." 

"  Here,"  continued  the  visionary,  "  the  angel  ap 
peared  quite  overcome,  and  burst  into  tears,  when  I 
beheld  the  most  striking  phenomenon  conceivable. 
The  air  of  Heaven  became  illumed  by  the  softest  and 
most  beautiful  light  I  ever  saw.  Diamond  moun 
tains,  it  is  said,  dissolve  in  the  air  when  angels 
weep." 

"  Is  that  all  ?  "  asked  Arthur. 

"  No,  indeed.  When  the  angel  recovered  himself, 
I  asked  him  whether  many  took  advantage  of  their 
splendid  opportunities.  He  replied  with  a  look  of 
sorrow  which  pierced  me  to  the  core,  and,  lifting  his 
hand,  he  pointed  to  the  plains  below.  I  turned 
round,  and  beheld  a  vast  sea  of  all  kinds  of  people, 
each  carrying  the  banner  of  his  faith  in  hand.  They 
appeared  to  come  towards  us  in  successive  waves  ; 
but,  as  I  looked  more  attentively,  some  went  back, 
while  others  went  both  backwards  and  forwards,  yet 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  Iir 

advanced  upon  the  whole.  I  imagined  myself  again 
on  the  Atlantic ;  for  great  black  clouds  would  appear 
in  the  east,  and,  spreading  themselves  over  the  face 
of  the  sky,  would  burst  with  loud  thunder,  and  rain 
balls  of  fire  on  the  panic-stricken  multitude. 

" '  Why  is  this  ? '  I  asked. 

" '  That,'  he  replied,  '  is  because  they  gather  to 
gether  in  crowds.  The  smoother  the  surface  and 
warmer  the  air  of  society,  the  greater  the  evapora 
tion  of  sin.  After  a  while,  a  cold  wind  blows  from 
the  north,  —  the  wind  of  insincerity,  —  and  few  es 
cape  uninjured.  This,  you  see,  is  a  city  of  innu 
merable  gates  ;  yet,  so  great  is  the  dislike  people 
have  of  coming  alone,  that  they  crush  each  other  in 
their  attempts  to  enter  through  the  same  gate.' 

" '  Then,'  said  I,  '  you  are  something  of  an  indi 
vidualist.  You  can't  be  a  Christian  angel.' 

"  '  I  am  a  universal  one,'  he  said,  stiffly.  '  I  help 
every  person  to  realize  the  blessings  of  Heaven  ; 
but,  as  long  as  he  does  only  that  which  his  neigh 
bors  do,  he  is  apt  to  ignore  the  gates  of  Eternal 
Life.  See  that  bishop.  He  leaves  this  open  door, 
and,  turning  himself  into  a  comet,  sweeps  off  with  a 
whole  host  of  well-dressed  Christians  for  a  tail.' 

"  '  But,'  said  I,  '  he  is  a  bishop  still,  more  than  half 
extinguished  by  his  mitre.  How  can  you  call  him  a 
comet  ? ' 

" '  Wait/  he  replied,  '  till  you  grow  accustomed  to 
the  ether.  You  will  soon  see  that  a  burning  and  a 
shining  light  may  well  be  an  erring  body.' " 

"  You  make  me  think  of  Swedenborg,"  said  Ar 
thur.  "  Bad  spirits,  on  approaching  the  good,  emit 


H2  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

an  offensive  odor  which  drives  them  back ;  but  I 
was  not  aware  the  odor  of  respectability  had  that 
effect." 

"  Phariseeism  is  the  besetting  sin  of  respectability. 
Carlyle  was  the  first  to  propose  the  crusade  which 
ought  to  take  place  against  it." 

"  Yet  you  said  the  Christians  who  rejected  their 
advantages  were  well  dressed.  Carlyle  believed  so 
much  in  good  clothes,  that  he  undertook  the  office 
of  tailor  for  himself." 

"  No  wonder  ;  for  the  words  of  the  prophet  are 
realized  :  '  They  parted  my  garments  amongst  them, 
and  on  my  vesture  did  they  cast  lots.'  If  Christ  was 
God,  he  was  also  Eternal  Thought ;  and,  since  lan 
guage  is  the  garment  of  all  thought,  his  words  must 
have  been  his  clothes.  Thus  it  would  appear  that 
each  of  the  Christian  sects  had  an  appropriate  piece 
of  the  original  texture  of  the  gospel,  cut  and  sewed 
to  fit  the  configuration  of  each  religious  body." 

"But  the  coat,  the  principal  garment  of  Christ, 
being  without  seam,  remains,,  whole." 

"  To  be  sure.  Hence  the  gambling  of  the  church. 
Even  we  must  assist  in  casting  lots  for  it.  But  here 
is  the  sublimest  thought  of  all :  a  millennium  is  at 
stake." 

"A  millennium!" 

"  Yes  :  your  millennium  and  mine  ;  and  it  all  de 
pends  upon  the  clothes  we  wear :  but  the  mystery 
of  the  seamless  coat  is  beyond  our  reach.  It  is 
indeed  easy  to  secure  a  remnant  of  gospel  truth  ; 
but  the  whole  still  remains  to  be  appropriated  by 
him  who  is  equal  to  the  task." 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


"  But  every  theologian  is  apt  to  think  that  his  par 
ticular  sect  contains  the  whole  truth  of  Christ." 

"  Yes  ;  and  they  all  prevail,  according  to  their  ge 
nius  and  character,  as  modified  by  Christ's  words." 

"  Not,  then,  by  the  living  Spirit  of  Christ  ?  " 

"  No,  not  so  much  ;  for  they  have  not,  owing  to 
the  strife  and  division  amongst  them,  succeeded  in 
finding  the  perfect  coat,  —  the  true  language  which 
expresses  the  whole  gospel  truth.  Controversy  is 
the  casting  of  the  lots  ;  and,  in  view  of  the  wrong 
which  this  method  of  gambling  has  entailed  upon 
the  race,  it  is  not  hard  to  see  that  there  is  not  a 
great  gulf  betwixt  the  swells  of  the  world  and  those 
of  the  church." 

"  For  shame,  Malcolm  !  how  dare  you  insinuate 
that  clergymen,  the  only  moral  teachers  we  have, 
are  no  better  than  the  fiends,  who,  having  crucified 
the  Lord,  gambled  and  fought  for  his  clothes  ?  " 

"  Excuse  me,  friend,  if  I  am  too  severe  ;  but  vio 
lent  diseases  require  violent  cures.  The  dragon's 
teeth  have  been  sown  amongst  us  ;  and,  as  the 
French  Revolutionists  swallowed  each  other  up,  I 
suppose  we  must  fight  for  Life  Eternal  at  the  ex 
pense  of  all  that  pertains  to  time  and  space.  I  aspire 
to  live  in  and  for  the  genius  of  the  united  humani 
ties,  and  have  no  peace  beyond  the  satisfaction  I 
take  in  so  doing.  The  individual  mind 'perishes, 
and  this  I  say  in  full  view  of  that  immortal  sea 
which  brought  me  hither." 

"  I  do  not  quite  understand  you.  Are  you  a 
stranded  vessel,  or  one  that  is  safely  moored  in  the 
haven  that  is  ? " 


II4  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

"  Neither ;  or  rather  I  am  infinitely  more  than 
both  ;  but,  unfortunately,  I  am  not  all  that  I  am 
bound  to  be.  Remember,  if  we  commune  concern 
ing  the  mysteries,  we  must  hold  all  things  in  solu 
tion,  and  reproduce  them  at  will.  As  my  friend 
Shaft  says,  God  only  exists  for  the  regeneration  or 
recreation  of  himself  in  every  living  creature." 

"  Then  you  aspire  higher  than  to  the  possession 
of  a  single  coat  ?  " 

"  Here  is  where  we  must  be  cautious  ;  for  we 
approach  the  inscrutable  Fountain  of  Life,  and  no 
human  eye  can  see,  nor  tongue  can  tell,  what  the 
Spirit  is  ;  no,  not  one,  even  if  all  Science  was  con 
verted  into  a  single  eyeball  for  the  sake  of  behold 
ing  Him  once.  We  must  needs  be  silent  before 
Him,  for  we  stand  in  the  mansion  of  God  ;  and  if 
we  look  around  us  we  may  behold  the  prophets  and 
holy  men  of  old,  —  see  how  the  ghosts  speed  by." 

"  You  are  a  confirmed  infidel  and  a  mystic,  Mal 
colm.  I  thought,  after  so  long  a  passage,  you  would 
land  me  somewhere  ;  but  I  am  nowhere." 

"  Well,  I  will  sail  back  and  see  if  I  cannot  show 
you  where  you  are.  Let  us  cast  lots  again.  There  ! 
you  draw  the  longest  one,  and  take  the  prize.  I 
wish  you  joy.  Let  me  help  you  on  with  the  whole 
gospel  truth !  Now,  you  see,  if  I  am  an  infidel,  it  is 
because  you,  not  I,  have  obtained  the  whole  coat." 

"  You  are  veering  round  at  last,  I  see,"  said 
Arthur,  laughing.  "  But,  since  you  need  it  more 
than  I,  take  it  yourself." 

"  Certainly  :  I  accept  it  gladly,  and  will  wear  it  as 
long  as  I  can.  But,  joking  aside,  Arthur,  you  see 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


that  we  all  need  symbols  of  our  own  ;  and,  granted 
even  that  the  church  makes  them  to  order,  it  is 
necessary  that  we  see  to  our  measurement.  Thus 
my  infidelity,  if  there  be  any  infidelity  about  it,  is 
unfaithfulness  to  the  style  or  method  of  other  men. 
I  recognize  no  authority  but  conscience  and  reason, 
which,  in  reality,  are  one  and  the  same  thing.  I 
fashion  my  language  according  to  their  dictates ; 
and  in  so  far  as  I  do  this  I  am  true  to  the  will  of 
God  and  the  good  sense  of  all  humanity.  But  if,  on 
the  other  hand,  I  willfully  ignore  or  pervert  their 
language,  or  that  of  better  men,  I  am  worse  than  the 
basest.  The  question  between  me,  a  self-sufficing 
thinker,  and  you,  a  churchman,  is  the  same  question 
which  will  always  exist  between  the  re-former  and 
the  person  to  be  re-formed  or  regenerated." 

"  But  who  regenerated  you,  Malcolm  ? " 

"Myself;  and  I  came  more  naked  into  the  world 
than  I  did  when  I  was  an  infant.  Christianity  acted 
as  my  nurse,  and  gave  me  my  swaddling  clothes ;  but 
now,  as  a  growing  person,  I  look  around  for  a  suit 
able  dress." 

"  It  seems  to  me,"  said  Arthur,  "  that  you  ignore 
the  breadth  of  the  denominational  cloth." 

"  By  no  means  ;  but  the  material  is  too  poor.  But 
let  us  drop  the  figure,  and  use  plain  speech.  The 
fact  is,  Arthur,  I  will  not  go  to  the  Old  and  New 
Testament  alone  for  stuff,  but  ransack  the  universe, 
pick  up  the  steamers  from  the  seas,  unfix  the  stars, 
invert  volcanoes,  and  play  football  with  the  planets. 
There  is  no  use  talking.  We  must  move  in  concert 
with  the  Eternal,  as  it  dances  from  world  to  world, 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

or  rides  on  the  waves  of  the  ages,  or  rushes  in 
righteous  indignation  in  the  whirlwinds  of  battle 

O  O 

and  confusion.  It  is  not  only  the  calm  and  the 
meek,  the  piteous  aspect  of  Omnipotent  Grief,  that 
claim  our  worship,  but  the  tempest  and  the  fire  of 
Holiness  and  Virtue.  Begone,  ye  parts  and  partiali 
ties  !  betake  yourselves  to  the  nothingness  from 
which  ye  spring !  I  will  have  the  whole  or  none  ; 
the  blackness  with  the  light,  the  grave  with  the  gay, 
the  empty  vague  with  the  all-in-all." 

"  But  it  seems  to  me,  Malcolm,  that  you  carry 
your  principles  to  extremes.  I  cannot  tolerate  the 
self-sufficiency  which  inspires  your  utterance.  It  is 
not  in  harmony  with  the  genius  of  Christianity,  as  I 
understand  it,  to  use  such  wild  and  incomprehensible 
language.  Now,  as  ideas,  even  the  idea  of  toler 
ance  itself,  are  necessarily  intolerant  and  exclusive 
of  all  that  which  hinders  their  realization  in  the 
world  without,  I  must  logically  reject  your  opinions 
as  errors  ;  or,  in  other  words,  as  a  sincere  Christian, 
I  neither  can  nor  will  suffer  any  individual  to  sow 
tares  with  the  wheat  of  my  religion." 

"  So  you,  even  in  this  advanced  period,  would  im 
prison  your  theological  opponents  ?  " 

"  Why  not  ?  All  society  acts  on  the  principle  of 
limiting  the  power  of  the  false  and  the  bad.  The 
jail  compels  the  thief  to  obey  the  moral  mandates 
of  the  land.  How  much  more  desirable  to  imprison 
the  loose  thinkers  who  sow  the  seed  of  error  and 
confusion,  which,  taking  root  in  the  minds  of  the 
ignorant,  spoil  them  for  life !  What  is  religious 
truth  for,  if  not  to  be  applied  to  the  betterment  of 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


mankind  ?  And,  since  he  who  interferes  with  re- 
ligous  truth  interferes  with  that  betterment,  shall  he 
not  be  punished  accordingly  ?  " 

"  Yes,  if  we  can  ;  but  we  have  advanced  so  far  in 
liberality  and  toleration  that  we  must  sympathize 
with  one  another  in  our  immoralities,  winking  at 
the  peccadillos  of  society,  except  those  of  injured 
women  and  vulgar  clowns." 

"  Your  irony  is  not  inapt,  Malcolm  ;  but,  consider 
ing  this  lamentable  state  of  affairs,  would  I  not  be  jus 
tified  in  confining  those  who,  in  spite  of  their  splen 
did  opportunities,  reject  salvation  through  Christ  ?  " 

"  Yes,  if  you  are  good  and  strong  enough  to  lift 
and  throw  the  first  stone.  You  see,  our  thought 
changes  every  day  ;  you  will  at  least  grant  that  you 
grow  in  grace." 

"  Certainly." 

"  Supposing,  then,  that  when  you  were  thirty  you 
were,  like  Paul,  so  strong  in  the  orthodoxies  of  your 
nation,  that,  in  justice  to  the  cause  of  truth,  you  felt 
it  a  duty  to  hang  a  Unitarian,  would  you,  ten  years 
afterwards,  if  you  happened  to  become  a  Unitarian, 
hang  an  Orthodox  ?  " 

"  Certainly.  There  are  only  two  religions,  —  the 
religion  of  indifferentism  and  that  of  proselytism. 
If  I  am  Orthodox,  or  whatever  I  am,  I  will  be  it  like 
a  man,  not  as  a  mere  player  or  dilletante" 

"  So  you  would  actually  insist,  if  you  could,  in 
this  age  of  religious  independence,  on  making  others 
accept  a  final  statement  of  religion  ?  " 

"  Certainly.  I  will  preach  Christ  to  the  last,  and 
confine  the  heretic  if  I  can." 


H  S  RA INB  OW  A  ND  RE  A  LITY. 

"  Even  me  ?  " 

"  Even  you,"  cried  the  youth,  waxing  enthusiastic 
in  his  turn.  "  Death  to  the  infidel,  to  all  who  hin 
der  me,  in  so  far  as  I  represent  the  Truth  !  " 

"  Good  for  you,  brother  !  but,  of  course,  you  do 
not  believe  yourself  totally  depraved." 

"  I  suppose  I  must  allow  that  I,  considered  apart 
from  the  Truth,  which  I  love  to  represent,  am  alto 
gether  wrong.  Yes,  Christ  is  the  way,  the  truth, 
and  the  life  ;  and  I,  alas,  am  indeed  nothing !  " 

"  Well,  in  this  case,  Arthur,  you  ought  to  begin 
the  work  of  reform  by  the  massacre  of  yourself ;  for, 
being  altogether  nothing,  you  cannot  hope  to  ad 
vance  the  interests  of  Christ  ?  " 

"  So  I  do,"  said  the  undaunted  Arthur.  "  True 
philosophy  must  begin  with  self-sacrifice  ;  and  it  is 
simply  on  account  of  man's  depravity  that  he  must 
lose  his  life  in  this  world,  in  order  to  save  it  in  the 
next.  The  death  of  to  day  is  the  life  of  to-morrow. 

"  I  like  that,  Arthur  ;  but  your  logic  reduces  you 
to  self-immolation  ;  mine,  to  self-preservation." 

"  But  why  reverse  the  whole  order  of  Christian 
poetry  ? " 

"  Because  it  is  wrong  to  admit  that  Christ,  as 
God,  died  even  for  a  day." 

"  It  is  plain,  Malcolm,  that  we  cannot  sail  to 
gether.  Like  Dean  Swift,  you  have  gone  to  sea  in 
a  tub  ;  your  experience  will  not  impress  people  with 
the  safety  of  independent  spirit  navigation.  I  envy 
those  people  who  can  wind  up  the  universe  and  put 
it  under  their  pillow  when  they  go  to  bed." 


V. 

THE   LAPSE. 

MALCOLM,  tossed  about  as  we  have  shown 
on  the  waves  of  theological  thought,  would 
not,  perhaps,  have  enjoyed  his  schooling  so  much 
had  it  not  been  for  the  prospect  of  his  marriage 
with  Miss  Crisp.  And  the  longer  he  dwelt  on  the 
happiness  in  store  for  him,  the  more  tempted  was 
he  to  lay  aside  his  heretical  ideas,  and  cast  anchor 
in  the  safe  haven  of  his  sect.  This  consideration 
operated  on  his  radical  feverishness  with  hydro 
pathic  efficacy,  and  he  began  to  deliberate  how  to 
deport  himself  under  his  present  trying  circum 
stances.  For  he  was  a  well-meaning  lad,  and  did 
not  relish  the  prospect  of  becoming  untrue  to  him 
self.  All  that  he  had  to  do  to  obtain  the  approval 
of  the  Church  and  the  world  was  to  make  himself  a 
passable  minister  of  the  Gospel,  according  to  the 
somewhat  mixed  yet  tenderly  orthodox  ideas  of  his 
expected  father-in-law  ;  which  task,  the  reader  will 
readily  surmise,  was  not  above  the  native  ability 
and  resolute  industry  of  the  lad,  even  if  he  had  not 
the  good  luck  of  being  called  to  the  profession  by 
special  request  of  the  Deity.  "  I  can  easily  under 
stand,"  he  said  to  himself,  "  how  a  consistent  mystic 
like  Shaft  can  accept  the  doctrines  of  the  Church  by 
giving  them  a  significance  which  no  church  or  sect 

("9) 


120  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

has  yet  done.  But,  while  I  admire  the  ingenuity 
and  lofty  ambiguities  of  that  gentleman,  it  is  not  for 
me  to  adopt  his  or  any  other  person's  thought  to 
the  suppression  of  my  own.  Yet,  as  things  are  as 
they  are,  and  not  that  which  they  seem,  what  am  I 
to  do  ?  It  seems  as  easy  for  me  to  appropriate  the 
mystic  ideas  of  Shaft  as  the  coarse  oratory  of  Pro 
gressive  Bungle  and  Buzz,  or  the  spiritual  plaintive- 
ness  of  Lullaby,  or  even  the  languid  notions  of  any 
of  the  current  vulgarities  called  creeds.  God,  if  I 
understand  myself  at  all,  has  evidently  predestined 
me  for  an  actor  ;  and,  this  being  the  case,  why 
should  not  I  rejoice  in  the  broad  platform  offered 
me  by  the  Independent  Spirit  Navigation  Sect  of 
this  grand  and  enlightened  republic,  as  an  appro 
priate  stage  for  the  exhibition  of  my  talents?  What 
an  admirable  combination  the  united  wits  of  the 
said  clergymen  in  one  person  would  make !  But, 
confound  the  thing!  I  hate  hypocrisy,  and  cannot 
make  up  my  mind  to  put  on  so  hideous  a  mask,  or, 
indeed,  in  any  case  not  to  speak  as  I  feel,  or  adopt 
any  part  in  the  Drama  of  Life  to  the  exclusion  of 
the  one  I  am  best  fitted  to  play.  If  I  die  for  it,  I 
am  forced  to  confess  that  this  man,  Infidel  though 
he  is,  is  more  honest,  and  has  more  truth  on  his 
side,  than  at  least  one-half  of  the  clergymen." 

Here  he  lifted  up  a  tract,  written  by  the  Rever 
end  Horatio  Seiber,  the  left-hand  man  of  the  Free 
Theological  Association,  and  read, — 

"  In  place  of  the  doctrine  that  'there  is  no  other  way'  tc 
be  saved  from  sin  than  through  the  blood  and  merits  of  Jesus 
Christ,  we  teach  that  man  can  be  saved  from  the  conse- 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  I2i 

quences  of  sin  only  by  avoiding  a  sinful  course  of  life,  and 
that  he  will  be  far  more  likely  to  do  this  by  trying  to  improve 
his  own  blood  and  merits  than. by  depending  upon  the  blood 
and  merits  of  anybody  else." 

"  Now,"  he  continued,  "  in  view  of  the  palpable 
truth  thus  crudely,  yet  nevertheless  strongly  stated, 
which  has  been  sanctified  by  a  life  of  unswerving 
industry  and  intense  devotion  to  his  highest  ideas 
of  mental  freedom,  how  can  I  conscientiously  re 
frain  from  proclaiming  the  Truth  as  I  now  see  and 
realize  it  to  be  ?  And  yet  I  am  called  upon  in  the 
name  of  God  and  duty  to  put  myself  in  the  back 
ground,  and  preach  the  mixed  notions  which  are 
vulgarly  called  Christ,  which,  shortly  stated,  amount 
to  this,  —  namely,  that  all  mankind,  being  doomed 
and  deadened  by  the  fall  of  the  first  Adam,  can  now 
be  saved  from  eternal  torment  only  by  the  mystic 
efficacy  of  Jesus'  blood,  a  remarkable  prophet  who 
lived  some  two  thousand  years  ago.  Now  that  this 
scheme  of  salvation  may,  as  Shaft  explained,  be  a 
grand  and  comprehensive  allegory,  originally  based 
on  the  pure  logic  of  Reason,*  as  that  is  manifested 
in  the  Oriental  imagination,  and  that  it  thereby 
could  only  have  secured  and  maintained  its  influ 
ence  over  the  mind  of  mankind,  I  have  not  the 
smallest  doubt.  Yet,  while  I  plainly  see  and  allow 
for  all  this,  and  would  gladly  use  this  allegory  to 
the  extent  of  my  ability,  even  as  I  would  the  gift 
of  language,  which,  after  all,  is  only  a  collection  of 
little  images  or  allegories,  having  their  origin  in  the 

*  The  word  is  here  used  in  the  deeper  transcendental 
sense  which  it  has  according  to  Kant  and  others. 


I22  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

observation  and  experience  of  the  Spirit,  I  have  no 
right  whatever  to  ascribe  to  it  any  dogmatic  mean 
ing,  or  to  substitute  either  it  or  any  other  trope, 
parable,  symbol,  or  allegory  for  the  Living  Truth 
which  all  kinds  of  religious  language  unite  in  ex 
pressing,  —  namely,  the  simple  fact  that  any  person 
can,  if  he  will,  become  worthy  of  a  mission  equally 
noble,  equally  divine  with  that  of  any  deified  hero 
who  ever  blessed  the  race.  But,  alas !  how  am  I 
to  express  this  Truth  in  a  worthy  manner,  and  pub 
lish  it  as  it  must  be  done  to  those  who  need  it  ? " 

Here  he  caught  a  glimpse  of  the  vast  amount  of 
trouble  and  pain  he  would  have  to  endure  in  order 
to  do  it  justice.  And  as  he  dwelt  upon  the  vistas 
of  the  dark  future  suggested,  he  shrank  back  ap 
palled  at  the  task ;  for  it  might  indeed  involve,  to 
begin  with,  the  sacrifice  of  his  intended  bride.  Then 
the  modern  Devil,  or  that  part  of  him  which  haunts 
the  secret  places  of  the  Church,  interwove  himself 
with  his  thought,  and  spoke :  — 

"  Ay,  what  will  she  say,  and  her  father  ?  and  pray 
what  canst  thou  hope  to  gain  by  this  remarkable 
confession  of  faith  in  thyself,  as  opposed  to  the  for 
tified  opinions  and  embattled  prejudices,  the  living 
Gods  of  the  bishops  and  the  lords,  the  deacons  and 
the  dukes  of  the  world  ?  Dost  thou  not  see  that 
thine  eager  affirmation  will  pass  for  blasphemy,  thy 
reasons  for  the  ravings  of  a  visionary  possessed, 
and  thy  love  for  the  restless  malice  of  envy  and  dis 
content  ?  This  insensate  devotion  to  the  Truth  will 
not  only  deprive  thee  of  the  woman  thou  lovest,  but 
give  her  and  her  father  and  all  thy  friends  needless 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


distress.  And  the  gleaming  ocean  of  social  pleas 
ures  —  Creole  manners,  bright  eyes,  sympathetic 
satins,  entrancing  silks  —  which  surround  thee  on 
all  sides,  skirting  the  shores  of  thy  being  with 
graceful  curves  and  pleasant  spray,  will  sink  far  be 
neath  thee,  and  thou  wilt  be  left  alone  on  the  naked 
summit  of  Egotism,  there  to  see  and  suffer  the  con 
sequences  of  rebellion.  And  behold,  Zeus  shall  direct 
his  Strength  and  his  Force  to  bind  thee  in  adaman 
tine  bonds;  and  the  fire  of  his  wrath  shall  nail  thee 
to  the  gray  rock  of  neglect  and  despair  ;  and  thy 
great  but  impotent  sympathy  with  those  who  bear 
the  burdens  of  the  world  shall  lie  in  thy  bosom  like 
a  living  coal.  And  thou  shalt  cry  aloud  in  the 
anguish  of  thy  heart  ;  for  the  Christian  Zeus  shall 
rise  against  thee  in  all  the  majesty  of  his  might. 
Yea,  the  Lord,  who  is  Lord  of  hosts,  will  hold  thee 
in  derision  ;  and  the  thunders  of  his  wrath  will  fall 
upon  thy  head  ;  and  the  scream  of  the  eagle  which 
shall  come  to  prey  upon  thy  bowels  will  drown  the 
voice  of  thy  anguish.  Where,  then,  shall  be  the 
thought  or  the  forethought  which  can  free  thee 
from  the  horrible  fate  thy  mistaken  philanthropy 
shall  precipitate  upon  thee?  Steal  fire  from  Heaven, 
thou  fool  !  wherefore  not  rest  content  with  things 
as  they  now  seem  ?  for  the  new  hopes  thou  wouldst 
give  to  others  are  blind  and  very  vague  ;  and  the 
creative  fire  thou  art  about  to  steal  shall  only  con 
sume  thine  own  soul  in  the  heat  of  unrequited  en 
deavor.  Thus  thy  punishment  shall  be  well  deserved, 
and  descend,  also,  upon  all  who  receive  the  fatal  gift 
from  thy  hand  ;  for  the  Lord,  the  Zeus  of  the  Chris- 


124 


RAINBOW  AND   REALITY. 


tians,  is  a  jealous  God,  and  will  in  nowise  suffer  any 
infringement  of  his  Church.  Behold,  then,  in  a  lit 
tle  while  thou  shalt  disappear  from  the  earth,  utterly 
crushed  by  his  thunders." 

Here  Malcolm  laughed  wildly  at  the  novelty  of 
his  thought ;  for  it  was  full  of  ghastly  satire.  And 
so  the  negative  came  off  the  victor,  having  made 
the  young  minister  prudently  resolve  to  defer  the  ex 
pression  of  his  own  thought.  Like  many  a  sainted 
individual  before  him,  he  naturally  thought  that  the 
best  thing  he  could  do  was  to  be  as  good  and  sin 
cere  a  Christian  as  the  circumstances  would  allow. 

Thus  he  became  very  guarded  in  the  expression 
of  what  little  thought  he  chose  to  utter,  lest  he 
should  suffer  from  the  further  imputation  of  her 
esy.  He  now  saw  the  necessity  of  making  longer 
prayers,  —  thus  demonstrating  the  solemn  truth, 
"the  farther  from  God,  the  more  prayer,"  —  and 
to  the  surprise  of  his  classmates  appeared  to  ap 
preciate  certain  arguments  about  the  miracles,  to 
which  heretofore  he  had  been  quite  impervious ; 
whereat  his  teachers  talked  ominously  about  the 
mystic  operations  of  the  Spirit,  and  were  pleased 
to  allow  that  there  was  after  all  considerable  in  the 
lad,  and  that  no  doubt  he  would  in  time  become  a 
popular  minister.  And  so  carried  away  was  the  youth 
by  the  brilliant  future  in  store  for  him,  and  so  alive 
was  he  to  the  perils  of  being  anything  but  a  Chris 
tian  in  the  most  approved  sense  of  that  ambigu 
ous  word,  that  he  even  wrote  pious  letters  to  his 
beloved,  and,  laying  ^Eschylus  and  Plato  on  the 
shelf,  plunged  at  once  into  the  depths  of  Paley, 
Spurgeon,  and  Beecher. 


VI. 


A  LETTER    FROM    JENNIE,  OR  THE   TANGI 
BLE   RESULT   OF   DESERVING    PIETY. 

WHAT  of  Miss  Crisp  all  this  time  ?     How  had 
she  been  advancing,  and  had  the  Rev.  Dr. 

Pluffle  fairly  transfigured  himself  in  her  sight  ? 
This  last  letter  of  hers  to  Malcolm  may  throw  as 
much  light  upon  the  matter  as  the  reader  may 
require. 

BRAGVILLE,  TUESDAY. 
DEAREST  MALCOLM, 

As  I  was  spending  the  day  with  Julia  Flippert  when  that 
letter  of  yours  came  in  which  you  spoke  so  lovingly  of  your 
Redeemer,  I  did  not  receive  it  until  tea-time.  As  soon  as 
I  had  read  and  re-read  it,  I  ran  to  show  it  to  papa,  who  was 
delighted  with  it.  He  said  he  had  no  idea  that  you  were 
so  capable,  and,  —  only  think,  Malcolm,  —  if  you  could  only 
express  yourself  a  little  more  decidedly  about  the  Lord,  you 
would  be  fit  for  one  of  the  first  pulpits  in  Bragville.  But, 
strange  to  say,  dear  Malcolm,  although  I  was  overjoyed  to 
see  your  recognition  of  Christ's  merits,  I  did  not  think  the 
letter  like  yourself.  I  missed  a  nameless  something,  which 
made  me  sad. 

Dr.  Pluffle  called  at  his  usual  hour,  and  papa,  in  the  course 
of  conversation,  glowing  at  the  recollection  of  some  of  your 
words,  made  me  show  the  letter  to  him,  saying,  "  What  do 
you  think  of  that,  brother?  The  boy  is  sound  as  a  dol 
lar.  I've  often  told  you  so,  but  you  scarcely  believed  me." 
Dr.  Pluffle  read  the  letter,  and,  looking  queer,  replied,  that, 
although  the  tone  of  the  letter  was  healthy,  you  had  some 
thing  to  learn  yet,  as  there  were  a  few  ambiguities  in  it  which 

(125) 


126  RAINBOW  AND   REALITY. 

indicated  "a  slight  departure  from  the  blessed  letter  of  reve 
lation."  But  papa  only  smiled  satirically,  asking  what  he 
could  expect  from  a  lad  of  your  originality,  and  told  him  that 
he  need  not  be  so  particular  in  these  radical  times,  since  even 
Drs.  Buzz  and  Bungle  were  not  so  sound  as  he  would  like  to 
see  them. 

I  must  say,  Malcolm,  that,  while  I  rejoice  to  perceive  that 
you  come  nearer  the  Truth  of  the  creed  I  miss  that  sim 
plicity  of  speech  which  I  admired  in  you  at  first.  I  am 
afraid,  after  all,  there  is  more  sophistry  in  Divinity  schools 
than  is  good  for  the  sacred  cause.  Really,  I  cannot  under 
stand  why  so  long  a  time  is  required  for  young  men  to 
learn  to  preach  and  pray  what  they  are  supposed  to  know, 
or  have  by  heart,  already,  —  namely,  the  "Spirit  of  Infi 
nite  Self-sacrifice,"  as  old  Dr.  Seegood,  my  mother's  minis 
ter,  used  to  call  it.  But  we  poor  girls,  with  our  little  heads, 
are  not  expected  to  understand  the  systematic  Theology 
which  is  essential  to  young  ministers'  salvation.  That,  how 
ever,  may  be  one  of  the  mysteries  of  Religion  which  not 
even  the  wisest,  in  the  plenitude  of  their  powers,  are  permit 
ted  to  solve.  "  Poor,  weak  human  reason,"  is  Pluffle's  motto, 
and  there  is  more  truth  than  poetry  in  it.  But  never  mind 
my  impertinence,  dear  Malcolm  :  keep  doing  your  best,  as 
you  used  to  tell  me  to. 

We've  had  much  company  of  late,  and  Julia  Flippert  has 
been  helping  me.  She's  splendid.  By  the  way,  here's  a 
present  for  you  from  papa  (check  for  five  hundred  dollars),  and 
there  is  another  (for  the  same  amount)  which  I  want  you  to 
invest  for  my  benefit.  Get  me  an  India  shawl  like  pattern, — 
small  figures,  mind.  Little  people  are  frights  in  big  figures. 

You  have  not  seemed  so  happy  of  late.  Let  us  know  if  you 
are  at  all  out  of  sorts:  I  miss  you.  I  amuse  myself  trying 
to  find  out  the  meaning  of  those  stories  in  the  Arabian  Nights 
you  called  my  attention  to.  I  have  succeeded  with  one,  —  the 
very  last  story  in  the  book.  The  mountain  where  the  speak 
ing  bird,  the  golden  water,  and  the  singing  tree  are  to  be 
found  is  the  Hill  of  Christian  Progress,  which  the  soul  must 
ascend  to  obtain  those  gifts  of  perfection,  the  reward  of 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

patient  effort  and  toil.  The  distracting  voices  which  try  to 
make  people  look  back  are  the  countless  temptations  of  life. 
We  yield,  and  are,  as  the  story  describes,  immediately  turned 
into  black  stones.  Remember  Lot's  wife.  The  talking  bird 
is  Wisdom,  who  is  the  slave  of  those  who  find  her.  The  best 
man  delights  in  being  the  servant  of  his  race.  The  bird 
points  to  the  golden  water,  as  Christ  points  to  the  Living. 
The  good  princess,  after  blaming  the  bird  as  the  cause  of  her 
misfortunes,  was  glad  to  do  its  bidding,  and  sprinkle  with  the 
precious  waters  the  black  stones  that  these  enchanted  beings 
might  be  restored  to  life  and  activity.  And  did  the  bird  not 
succeed,  by  dint  of  matchless  judgment  and  art,  in  clearing 
away  the  difficulties  that  had  beset  the  family  of  her  mistress  ? 
When  people  have  done  their  duty  they  always  feel  like 
singing.  How  natural  to  make  Heaven  a  house  of  Eternal 
Song  !  The  singing  tree  must  represent  the  joy  of  the  soul 
on  obtaining  the  other  gifts  of  grace.  Therefore,  Christ  is  at 
once  the  Great  Singer,  the  Prophet,  and  the  God.  How  many 
black  stones  have  been  disenchanted  by  the  sprinkling  of  his 
Living  Waters,  —  the  efficacy  of  his  Golden  Words  ! 

Yes,  indeed,  Malcolm,  I  am  truly  glad  to  find  that  you  have 
at  last  shown  some  resolution,  and  turned  your  back  upon 
those  misguided  men  who  call  themselves  radicals.  There  is 
now  nothing  to  hinder  you  from  becoming  a  successful  minis 
ter,  a  devoted  sprinkler  of  the  Living  Waters  of  Christ's 
Wisdom,  and  attaining  the  possession  of  the  Singing  Tree. 
Earnestly  trusting  that  you  will  persist  in  the  course  you 
have  taken,  —  you  see  our  whole  future  depends  upon  it,  —  I 
remain,  dear  Malcolm, 

Your  own 


"  How  good  she  is,  and  true,  in  spite  of  the  noth 
ingness  around  her  !  "  exclaimed  the  youth  as  he 
picked  up  the  bright  checks,  and  regarded  them  in 
an  indescribable  manner.  "  She  is  like  a  fresh-culled 
pond-lily,  in  whose  petals  a  few  aphides  still  linger  ; 
but  they  are  easily  shaken  off.  Yet  what  shall  I  do 


I2g  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

with  this  money  ?  Well,  I  suppose  I  must  do  as  I 
am  told.  Little  people  are  frights  in  big  figures. 
What  a  queer  world  this  is, —  what  with  mira 
cles,  creeds,  religious  sensibilities  personified,  fine 
shawls,  and  all  the  other  glories  of  civilization  ! 
And  this  money  my  Christmas  present,  the  thirty 
pieces  of  silver  which  I  receive  in  exchange  for  be 
traying  myself  into  the  hands  of  the  Scribes  and 
Pharisees.  What  a  conversion  !  I,  who  felt  myself 
beginning  to  be  a  Jesus,  am  in  a  fair  way  to  become 
a  Judas.  I  must  congratulate  the  Church  on  her 
acquisition.  But  there  is  no  visible  cross,  so  I  will 
be  saved  the  remorse  of  beholding  the  murder  of 
my  Master.  Am  I  to  be,  or  am  I  not  to  be  ?  that  is 
the  ever-recurring  question  of  the  soul.  And  I  re 
ply  in  the  negative.  For  there  is  no  Truth,  no  God; 
and  the  man  of  Abstract  Virtue  is  a  fool,  all  lan 
guage  a  fraud  ;  and  there  is  iio  being  worthy  of  re 
gard  save  Force,  whose  very  life  is  pleasure.  He, 
then,  shall  be  the  God  of  my  worship,  and  death  to 
the  vague  botheration  I  loved  to  call  my  true  self. 
So  Force  becomes  my  'Eire  Supreme,'  and  I  will 
be  a  Robespierre  to  the  conscience  which  interferes 
with  my  joy.  If  the  so-called  life  of  zealous  Virtue 
is  the  only  real  life,  and  that  of  obvious  pleasure 
and  respectable  content  mere  sleep,  I  prefer  to 
sleep  on,  even  at  the  risk  of  doom.  What  am  I 
saying?  There  is  no  doom  for  the  strong  man 
whose  stomach  is  superior  to  his  soul,  —  naught 
but  ease,  affluence,  peace,  joy,  and  good  repute. 
What,  pray,  is  Shaft  compared  with  Crisp  ?  The 
one  twists  the  actual  world  into  any  shape  he 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


129 


pleases,  while  the  other  makes  a  rope  of  sand  or 
blows  word-bubbles.  What  a  fool  I  were  to  choose 
the  lot  of  the  latter !  No  !  The  man  of  matter, 
the  owner  of  ships,  stocks,  pews,  and  all  manner  of 
stuff,  is  the  living  person,  and  the  vague  twister  of 
words  is  the  ghost.  But  this  is  rather  a  forbidding 
way  of  looking  at  it.  Moderation  in  all  things.  I 
will  be  meek  and  mild  with  my  lEtre  Supreme!  oh,  so 
meek  and  poor  in  Spirit,  that  I  shall  at  once  inherit 
the  earth  and  the  kingdom  of  Crisp's  Heaven.  For 
I  will  occupy  a  high  place  both  in  and  out  of  the 
Church,  and  no  man,  in  view  of  my  son-in-lawship, 
and  the  pulpit  I  shall  occupy,  will  dare  say  a  word 
against  me.  And  I  will  be  liberal,  so  optimistically 
indulgent  to  other  men's  creeds,  that  I  will  pass  for 
one  of  the  best  hearts  in  the  country.  But  in  this 
sleep  of  death  visions  may  come.  What  if  they  do  ? 
I  will  make  the  most  of  them  for  the  good  of  my 
kind.  But  the  vision  of  the  Eternal  may  come,  even 
as  it  came  before  ?  Let  it  come :  I  will  sleep  on  ; 
and  with  the  Church  for  a  bed-fellow  why  should  I 
care  about  the  future  ?  And  her  to  whom  you  have 
given  your  truest  love,  will  you  be  content  to  let  her 
and  her  children  sleep  this  sleep  of  death  with  you  ? 
Yes  :  for  I  am  her  Samson,  and,  Delilah-like,  she 
has  cut  off  my  hair  whilst  I  slept.  But  Samson 
knew  not  of  his  loss,  and  you  willingly,  gladly,  en 
dure  yours.  Woe  betide  you,  Malcolm,  for  the  Phi 
listines  are  cruel  and  strong,  and  your  'Eire  Supreme' 
shall  lose  his  strength  with  you.  Up  then,  sluggard  ! 
out  of  this  baneful  sleep,  and  fly  from  the  arms  of 
Delilah.  Her  fondness  is  a  snare,  her  wealth  a  hor- 
9 


130 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


rible  delusion.  Not  a  bit  of  it !  She  is  no  Delilah, 
but  a  dear  good  girl,  a  nice  Christian  girl,  —  a  little. 
worldly  it  is  true,  but  that  is  natural  enough  consid 
ering  her  position.  And  I,  what  am  I  but  a  poor 
young  man  who  ought  to  think  himself  a  lucky  dog 
—  confound  it,  I  do  not  like  the  language  of  the 
age.  But  what  need  I  care  ?  For  a  truth  there  is 
enjoyment  in  sleep,  and  I  shall  sleep  on  ;  for  there 
is  no  awakening.  The  die  is  cast,  and  I  am  content 
not  to  be  anything  but  an  ordinary,  good-natured, 
free  and  easy,  respectable  member  of  society,  hop 
ing  and  praying  that  all  is  for  the  best,  no  matter 
what  turns  up.  Back  then,  Conscience,  and  get 
thee  gone,  O  Reason,  to  the  mystic  depths  from 
which  ye  sprang.  God  or  no  God,  Fiend  or  no 
Fiend,  I  am  bound  to  enjoy  myself  as  a  worthy  ves 
sel  of  the  Church,  and  as  becometh  a  pupil  of  Bun 
gle  and  Buzz.  Here's  to  thee,  O  Force ! "  and  the 
lapsed  soul  drank  to  that  Darkness  whose  othei 
aspect  is  Pleasure  without  Virtue. 

Malcolm,  strange  to  say,  was  logical  and  straight- 
forward  in  his  villainy.  He  did  not  cheat  himself 
with  the  thought  that  he  could  make  a  pleasure  of 
Virtue.  Pleasure  and  Virtue  may  indeed  go  hand 
in  hand  for  a  brief  moment  now  and  then,  but  there 
are  fatal  obstacles  to  lasting  peace  between  the  two. 
And  no  doubt  when  the  Lord  refused  to  turn  stones 
(words)  into  bread,  and  to  fall  down  and  worship  his 
own  Devil,  he  felt  this  to  be  true.  Herein  lies  the 
strength  of  the  position  occupied  by  Jesus  as  the 
legal  God  of  Christendom  ;  for  he  is  thought  never 
to  have  fallen. 


VII. 

THE   SPIRIT'S   MEDIUM. 

MALCOLM  had  not  been  long  in  Huberton 
before  he  became  acquainted  with  an  ex 
tremely  well-meaning,  yet  rather  bigoted  clergy 
man,  called  Singleface,  the  father  of  the  James 
who  informed  the  faculty  of  his  heresy.  That 
gentleman,  though  at  first  repelled  by  the  free 
humor  of  Lawson,  soon  perceived  that  he  was  as 
earnest  at  heart  as  he  was  light  in  his  manners ;  and 
latterly,  especially  since  the  youth  appeared  to  grow 
conservative,  he  took  quite  an  interest  in  him,  and 
ran  the  risk  of  inviting  him  to  tea.  For  Brother 
Singleface,  notwithstanding  his  intelligence,  was  no 
friend  to  those  who  reject  the  fixed  doctrines  of  the 
Church.  Yet  he  hated  controversy,  declaring  that 
Religion  was  to  be  had  and  cherished  as  the  best 
gift  of  God,  and  that  the  most  absurd  thing  one 
could  do  was  to  attempt  its  defense.  "  For  Reli 
gion,"  said  he,  "  is  life  itself,  or  indeed  that  life  in 
God  into  which  no  earthliness  can  come." 

But,  alas  !  this  good  old  gentleman,  whom  all  his 
acquaintances  loved  as  their  best  friend,  fell  ill,  and 
appeared  to  be  on  the  point  of  death.  Evidently 
he  was  not  destined  to  survive  his  experience  of  the 
woful  decadence  of  faith  which  attended  the  advent 
of  the  Rainbow  Creed. 

('30 


I32  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

Malcolm  called  to  see  him  during  his  illness,  and 
had  many  edifying  talks  with  him  ;  for  the  near 
prospect  of  death  is  ever  a  stimulus  to  genuine 
thought.  The  sympathy  and  magnetism  of  the 
young  man  blended  with  the  serene  fervor  and 
fixed  piety  of  the  old  man,  and  the  most  perfect 
harmony  subsisted  between  them. 

"  How,"  asked  Malcolm  one  evening,  "  did  you 
work  among  the  poor  without  constantly  bringing 
forward  the  letter  of  your  creed  ? " 

"  The  nature  of  my  work  was  such  that  I  did  not 
even  know  that  I  had  a  creed.  I  relied  on  the 
Spirit,  and  he  never  failed  me." 

"  Did  you  always  feel  so  ?  " 

"  No,"  sighed  the  old  man :  "  I  have  made  many 
mistakes  in  this  life.  But  the  worst  I  ever  made 
was  compelling  my  children  to  believe  precisely  as 
I  did.  In  my. anxiety  for  their  welfare,  I  think  I 
was  a  little  too  strict  with  them,  and  I  did  not  make 
the  Truth  so  agreeable  as  I  wished.  My  aim  was  to 
give  them  a  deep  love  and  revere"nce  for  the  Word. 
But,  alas  !  the  Power  of  Darkness  is  very  strong, 
and  we  are  all  so  weak.  What  with  our  imagined 
progression,  and  theological  eclecticism,  dishonest 
.politicians,  and  corrupt  legislation,  I  fear  we  are  on 
the  high  road  to  perdition.  At  a  very  early  age 
my  son  proved  unfaithful  to  my  precepts,  and 
only  by  a  special  intervention  of  Providence  was 
he  saved." 

"  Why !  don't  you  approve  of  the  liberal  preach 
ing  of  Drs.  Buzz  and  Bungle  ? " 

"  No,  not  at  all.     Be  warned  by  me,  and  as  you 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


133 


value  your  soul  shun  it  as  you  would  immediate 
ruin.  The  duty  of  the  preacher  is  not  to  preach 
for  the  amusement  of  the  vulgar,  but  to  diffuse,  by 
his  own  example,  like  the  prophets  of  old,  the  prin 
ciples  of  morality  and  practical  religion.  Not  to 
discuss  or  to  theorize  about  those  principles  ;  for 
that  savors  of  all  that  is  unwholesome.  The  well 
man  speaks  not  of  his  health." 

"  But  what  shall  we  talk  about  ?  " 

"  Do  not  concern  yourself  about  that.  Give  your 
self  up  to  the  Holy  Spirit,  and  then  shall  you  ever 
say  the  right  word." 

"  But,"  asked  Malcolm,  "  don't  the  vulgar  revival 
ist  give  himself  up  to  him  ? " 

"Alas  !  Malcolm,  do  not  recall  the  revolting  fa 
naticism  which  usurps  the  throne  of  the  true  Chris 
tian.  Satan  can  quote  scripture  as  easily  as  good 
angels." 

"  Yet  how  am  I  to  treat  these  people  ? " 

"  Like  the  faithful  doctor  who  will  not  leave  his 
plague-stricken  patients.  The  Holy  Spirit  is  obedi 
ent  to  the  will." 

"  How  about  Reason,  in  Kant's  sense  of  the 
word  ? " 

"  The  Spirit  is  always  reasonable.  There  can  be 
no  conflict  between  Him  and  Reason." 

"In  this  case,  then,  there  is  no  difference  between 
you  and  me.  For  Reason  and  Spirit  are  one." 

"  Surely,  for  the  Reason  is  the  right  use  of  the 
faculties,  as  directed  by  the  Holy  Spirit,  who  re 
sponds  to  the  prayer  of  the  will." 

"  This,  also,  being  allowed,  Mr.   Singleface,  why 


134 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


should  honest  Infidels  and  superstitious  Christians 
consider  themselves  so  far  apart  from  one  another  ? 
The  Infidel  believes  in  Reason  to  the  exclusion  of 
the  thought  of  the  Holy  Spirit,  while  the  Christian 
believes  in  the  latter  to  the  exclusion  of  the  former. 
So,  if  Highest  Reason  and  the  Holy  Spirit  are  one, 
both  Christian  and  Infidel  are  essentially  correct,  in 
so  far  as  each  is  faithful  to  his  thought." 

"  Your  argument  is  ingenious.  I  suppose  I  must 
agree  with  you." 

"  Well,"  said  Malcolm,  "  let  us  exchange  for  a  few 
days :  you  take  the  Holy  Reason  and  use  it,  while 
I  take  in  exchange  the  Holy  Spirit,  and  use  it  to 
advocate  the  cause  of  essential  religion,  which  is 
possessed  alike  by  Jew  and  Gentile,  Christian  and 
Mohammedan." 

"  Tut,  tut,  my  young  friend.  You  are  going  too 
far.  We  must  not  forget  the  mystic  efficacy  of  the 
Blood.  But  here  comes  that  man  Tightcreed.  I 
know  his  step.  Retire  to  the  next  room,  and  leave 
the  door  ajar." 

As  Malcolm  retired,  the  said  doctor  came  in. 

The  fact  was  that  Drs.  Tightcreed  and  Bungle, 
Lullaby  and  Buzz,  thought  it  a  duty,  for  the  sake 
of  appearance  at  least,  to  pay  their  departing  friend, 
who  was  the  most  active  person  in  the  ministry,  a 
farewell  visit.  The  dying  man,  who  was  not  very 
fond  of  these  clergymen,  hardly  expected  this  ebul 
lition  of  sympathy  on  their  part ;  and,  if  he  had  not 
known  them  of  old,  he  might  have  considered  it  a 
sign  of  reformation.  At  all  events,  he  prepared  to 
accept  the  condolence  of  each  as  he  arrived,  and  to 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


135 


respond  graciously  to  their  considerate  prayers  for 
his  recovery. 

Tightcreed  was  the  first  to  call,  bringing  a  sec 
ond-hand  copy  of  the  Dore  Bible,  a  new  treatise 
on  the  miracles,  and  sundry  original  tracts  on  the 
future  life  according  to  the  consolatory  and  tempt 
ing  views  of  his  warmest  friends  in  the  Faith. 

"  These  small  tokens,"  said  Tightcreed,  sitting 
down,  and  laying  the  offering  on  the  table,  "  tes 
tify  to  the  appreciation  the  Christian  world  has  for 
your  devoted  service  in  the  Lord's  cause.  Take 
them,  my  dear  friend,  and  may  the  comfort  you 
derive  from  their  perusal  lighten  your  heart ;  and 
if  they  do  not  ensure  a  return  to  health,  they  may 
assist  you  to  cross  the  dark  river  which  divides  you 
from  the  glorious  beyond.  For  hopeful,  ever  hope 
ful,  is  the  Word,  —  ay,  beyond  all  conception,  hope 
ful  and  precious  is  the  Word.  Trust  it  now,  trust 
in  it  ever  as  ye  have  heretofore  done  ;  and  through 
this  trust,  as  evinced  in  resignation  to  His  will,  you 
will  secure  a  harp  and  a  crown  in  the  house  of  the 
blessed." 

Here  Tightcreed,  whose  red  nose  shone  approv 
ingly  on  a  bottle  of  spirits  which  raised  its  at 
tractive  stopper  high  above  the  Dore"  Bible,  as 
if  quite  displeased  at  the  intrusion  of  its  deadly 
enemy,  paused  for  an  answer. 

Mr.  Singleface,  however,  took  no  notice  of  Dr. 
Tightcreed's  benignant  regards  on  the  spirits,  and 
replied,  "  Many  thanks,  worthy  friend,  for  all  your 
care  and  attention.  I  will  look  at  your  gifts  with 
pleasure ;  but  before  I  go  to  my  Father  let  me 


136  RAINBOW  AND   REALITY. 

speak  one  word  of  advice.  May  I  speak  as  the 
Spirit  moveth  me  ?  " 

"  Surely,  surely,  my  good  friend,  say  what  you 
please  ;  for  there  is  wisdom  in  the  words  of  the 
departing." 

"  Well,  then,  Dr.  Benjamin  Tightcreed,  even  while 
I  appreciate  your  kindness  in  thus  coming  to  see 
me,  I  regret  being  obliged  to  charge  you  with  abuse 
of  the  Spirit." 

"  What ! "  exclaimed  the  doctor  in  a  great  rage, 
"  have  I  come  here  to  be  insulted  ? " 

"  Pardon  me,"  said  the  dying  man,  with  a  look 
of  such  deep  melancholy  that  Dr.  Tightcreed  was 
taken  aback.  "  Man  is  a  poor  weak  creature,  yet 
the  Spirit  is  omnipotent.  O  my  friend,  in  your 
vain  attempts  to  make  the  letter  alive  ye  have 
killed  your  soul.  Mark  well  my  words  ;  for  they 
are  my  last  to  you.  Yes,  your  creed  has  strangled 
the  Spirit.  And  I  see  it  now  for  the  first  time. 
Good  God !  how  does  it  happen  that  my  whole 
thought  is  changing  ?  No :  it  cannot  be  I  that 
am  speaking.  But  leave  me,  Tightcreed,  —  away 
and  repent."  (The  Spirit  had  entered  him.) 

That  gentleman  was  indignant ;  but,  putting  on 
a  look  of  pity,  he  said,  "  Good-by,  my  poor  friend. 
Let  me  call  the  doctor  on  the  way."  He  then  left, 
muttering,  "  His  mind  has  left  him  quite." 

No  sooner  had  he  retired  than  Dr.  Progressive 
Bungle  came  in,  bringing  a  large  basket  of  flowers, 
some  fine  jelly  of  all  colors,  and  a  few  cream-cakes. 
"Ah,  my  dear  Singleface,  I  am  truly  sorry  to  see 
you,  the  active  soul  of  our  denomination,  so  low. 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


137 


But  cheer  up,  old  heart,  there  is  a  glorious  future  in 
store  for  us.  There  are  four  rainbows  in  the  sky,  — 
the  four  great  hopes  of  immortality.  Yet  how  fleet 
ing  the  life  of  man  !  What  difference  does  it  make, 
after  all,  whether  we  remain  here  a  day  or  two  longer 
in  this  contemptible  garb  ?  For  my  part "  — 

"  Stop,  friend  ! "  cried  Singleface,  with  a  savage 
brightness  in  his  eye  :  "  do  you  refer  to  the  flesh,  or 
to  the  cloth  ?  " 

Here  Progressive  Bungle  laughed  heartily ;  for  he 
enjoyed  nothing  more  than  a  joke,  and  was  rather 
noted  for  his  "slants  at  theologians."  "Jokes,"  he 
used  to  say,  "  are  plums  in  the  Bread  of  Life,  whose 
butter  is  unction."  But  his  enemies  maintained  that 
his  Bread  of  Life  was  served  too  hot  and  fresh  to 
answer  their  digestion. 

"  Upon  my  word,"  he  replied  to  Mr.  Singleface, 
"  that  is  as  good  a  thing  as  I  have  heard  for  some 
time  past.  But  you  arc  unusually  severe.  What's 
up  ?  The  fact  is,  a  man  in  my  position  is  different 
from  anybody  else.  I  never  was  called  to  the  work 
with  you.  And  I  often  wish  that  I  had  not  been 
forced  into  this  uncomfortable  position  which  hin 
ders  me  from  doing  and  saying  what  I  please.  How 
ever,  since  we  must  allow  that  all  things  are  for  the 
best,  why  should  we  who  love  the  Lord  concern  our 
selves  about  this  empty  world  ? " 

"  Speak,  Bungle,  for  yourself.  I  am  willing  to  die 
for  your  sake,  if  need  be,  for  I  love  you.  But  you, 
alas  !  I  feel  in  my  heart,  have  little  or  no  love  for 
me.  The  spectacle  of  thy  theological  looseness  has 
cut  me  to  the  core." 


!38  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

"My  poor  friend,"  replied  Bungle,  with  a  con 
cerned  air,  "has  the  doctor  been  here  this  morning? 
I  have  no  doubt  but  you  will  recover  soon,  when  we 
will  be  as  good  friends  as  ever." 

No  sooner  had  he  left  the  room  than  in  walked 
Dr.  Lullaby,  with  a  new  edition  of  fashionable 
hymns  in  his  hand,  and  an  illustrated  volume  of 
Tennyson's  "  In  Memoriam,"  which  he  gave  him, 
saying,  "  My  dear  Bostonio  (this  was  Mr.  Single- 
face's  first  name),  I  was  much  grieved  to  hear  of 
your  sickness,  and  I  come  on  the  raven  wings  of 
sympathy,  with  a  tender  bit  of  Life's  Bread  in  my 
hand.  Let  me  read  my  favorite  verse,  — 

"  '  Ring  in  the  valiant  man  and  free, 
The  larger  heart,  the  kindlier  hand  ; 
Ring  out  the  darkness  of  the  land, 
Ring  in  the  Christ  that  is  to  be.' 

"  I  have  no  doubt  but  an  occasional  look  at  those 
poems  will  have  a  favorable  effect  on  your  consti 
tution.  Why  should  you  leave  us  so  soon  ?  Lay 
aside  all  thought  of  the  grave,  and  enjoy  the  hour 
that  is.  For,  believe  me,  my  dear  friend,  there  is 
nothing  to  be  gained  by  dwelling  morbidly  upon 
our  common  lot.  Just  see  the  sun.  How  benefi 
cently  he  shines  upon  us  all !  And,  hark  !  hear  the 
joyful  song  of  the  birds,  and  the  rare  touch  of  the 
nimble-fingered  wind  as  he  playfully  attempts  the 
accompaniment  on  the  trees.  Forget  your  grief. 
All  will  yet  be  well  with  you." 

"  But  not  with  you,  friend  Lullaby,"  cried  the  sav 
age  old  man;  "for  you  —  yes,  you,  Doctor  Simon 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


139 


Lullaby  —  will  go  to  Hell.  For  thou  art  the  fiend 
who  hast  done  more  to  put  me  on  my  death-bed 
than  any  other  individual.  Thy  seductive  soothing 
has  lulled  to  destruction  a  thousand  souls,  who, 
had  they  been  faithfully  spoken  to,  might  each 
have  been  a  Hercules.  Dost  thou  think  that  He, 
if  he  were  here  in  view  of  the  fraud  and  corruption 
of  the  times,  would  preach  as  thou  dost  ?  Get  thee 
gone,  old  Half-and-Half !  I'll  none  of  thee.  No 
wonder  infidelity  to  common  honesty  rears  his  kel 
py  head  high  above  the  fountains  of  the  churches  to 
swallow  up  the  young  of  Christianity." 

"  The  man  is  mad,"  cried  Dr.  Lullaby,  thoroughly 
alarmed.  "  Let  me  run  for  the  doctor ; "  and  he 
rushed  from  the  room. 

Scarce  had  the  door  closed  behind  him,  which  it 
did  with  a  bang,  when  Oratone  Buzz  appeared,  with 
the  solemn  yet  easy  air  peculiar  to  the  ecclesiasti 
cal  beau,  carrying  a  basketful  of  sea-shells  from  the 
Isle  of  Shoals  and  a  bag  of  game  from  the  Adiron- 
dacks  ;  for  he  was  both  a  yachtsman  and  a  man 
mighty  in  the  hunt. 

"  My  dearest  friend,"  he  began,  "  I  "  — 

"  Excuse  me  sir,"  cried  the  old  man,  who  was 
perfectly  frantic  at  sight  of  the  game.  "  I  am  not 
your  dearest  friend.  Do  you  think  the  dollars  and 
cents  your  dulcet  tones  have  wrung  from  the  pockets 
of  doubtful  characters,  from  Mr.  Twentypercent  and 
Mr.  Bad  Guttapercha,  will  mend  the  souls  of  the 
poor,  when  you  cannot  begin  to  mend  either  your 
own  or  those  of  your  fashionable  pew-holders  ?  I'll 
none  of  your  sea  shells,  I'll  none  of  your  game  ; 


I40  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

for  they  are  bought  with  coin  of  Hypocrisy  and 
Deceit.  Leave  me,  if  ye  have  the  least  regard  for 
my  health." 

Here  Oratone  fled  from  the  room,  realizing  for 
the  first  time  that  his  deacons  might  have  read  the 
Bible  to  better  advantage  than  he. 

Then  Malcolm  came  from  out  the  next  room,  and, 
falling  on  his  knees  beside  his  friend's  couch,  cried 
in  a  loud  voice,  "  O  Heaven,  help  me  to  be  faithful 
to  the  Truth  as  I  now  see  it  through  the  dying 
words  of  my  friend  !  of  him  who,  while  I  was  faint 
for  the  want  of  strength,  gave  it  me  when  I  least 
expected  it !  And  may  I  never  again  fall  from  the 
high  place  I  have  chosen  !  from  which  the  cities  of 
men,  great  though  they  are,  seem  but  grains  of  fer 
tilizing  salt  on  the  field  of  the  soul ! " 

He  then  looked  up,  but,  lo !  the  old  man  was  fast 
asleep  ;  as  yet  there  was  no  corpse. 

"  Surely,"  cried  the  youth,  "  the  old  man  must  be 
a  splendid  medium.  I  will  do  what  I  can  for  him.  I 
will  take  good  care  of  him,  and,  after  all,  the  doctors 
have  left  considerable  life  in  him.  He  improves." 

Thus  Malcolm  —  who,  by  the  way,  had  not  been 
able  to  become  so  bad  as  he  had  tried  to  be  —  re 
covered  his  footing,  and  henceforth  resolved  to -keep 
himself  upright.  He  went  home  determined  to  write 
no  more  loving  letters  about  his  Redeemer. 

The  Word  that  was  Light  still  shines,  but,  alas  ! 
the  darkness  has  gathered :  yet,  behold  !  in  the  far 
west  a  gleam  of  glory  is  seen.  What  can  the  shower 
of  falling  drops  but  restore  to  the  sun  the  imperfect 
reflex  of  his  own  face  ! 


VIII. 

SELF-RELIANCE. 

EARNEST  endeavor  to  do  right,  to  make  the 
most  of  ourselves,  is,  to  say  the  least,  a  notable 
thing;  and,  if  we  properly  respect  it,  it  is  astonish 
ing  to  find  with  how  much  of  the  so-called  supernat 
ural  we  can  dispense. 

Malcolm,  under  his  present  circumstances,  entan 
gled  as  he  is  in  the  meshes  of  infidelity  to  infidelity, 
is  not  unlike  the  fox  that,  being  caught  in  a  trap, 
could  only  extricate  itself  at  the  expense  of  its  tail. 
What  a  painful  experience  for  the  poor  fox !  what 
an  admirable  illustration  of  the  necessity  of  self-re 
liance  !  But  the  end  of  this  fable  amused  us  more 
than  the  beginning.  The  tailless  fox  went  and  told 
his  brethren  that  it  was,  upon  the  whole,  much 
better  to  be  without  the  bushy  appendage,  and 
kindly  advised  them  to  go  and  do  likewise.  But 
they  could  not  "  see  it."  Nor  can  we  blame  them. 
Thus  it  is  with  the  Godless  and  the  Godful ;  both 
try  to  make  proselytes. 

Why  this  endless  discussion  about  the  simple  fact 
of  God  ?  Does  the  Divine  Idea  not  grow  with  those 
who  conceive  it  ?  How  the  gods  of  the  Christians 
change!  The  last  judgment  has  lost  its  terrors, 
and  the  bland  idols  of  progressive  preachers  offer  a 
hell-less  future  to  a  callous  world. 

(HO 


I42  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

Malcolm's  superstitions  and  worldly  prospects 
were  to  him  what  the  tail  was  to  the  fox.  If  thy 
right  hand,  or  even  thy  right  eye,  offend  thee  (mor 
tifies),  get  rid  of  it ;  for  it  is  better  that  it  should 
perish  than  thou  thyself. 

In  this  connection,  being  led  into  unexpected 
depths,  we  feel  called  upon,  not  merely  to  moral 
ize,  but  even  to  sermonize,  in  the  midst  of  our 
story.  Hear  the  following  extract  from  a  lecture 
by  Mr.  Shaft :  — 

"  Temptation  !  what  is  this  most  mystic  experience  of  the 
soul  ?  A  person  is  offered  an  obvious  and  palpable  benefit, — 
it  may  be  a  jeweled  crown  or  even  a  fair  woman's  love,  —  yet, 
in  spite  of  the  ambition  boiling  within  him  like  an  imprisoned 
volcano,  or  in  spite  of  the  grasping  tentacles  of  hungry  de 
sire  (De'vil-fish),  he  disdains  the  offer.  '  What  a  morbid  fool ! ' 
cries  one  ;  'he  fears  the  pains  of  Hell,  and  with  praiseworthy 
and  Christian  caution  refuses  to  peril  his  soul.'  But  suppose 
that  his  fear  is  only  that  of  ordinary  white-faced  Death,  with 
a  star  of  flowers  on  his  breast,  asleep  on  the  cold  couch  of 
nonentity,  or  rather  that  he  has  no  fear  at  all,  but  either  rests 
on  the  firm  conviction,  or  somewhat  faint-heartedly  believes 
that  that  alone  which  he  feels  to  be  right  is  the  proper  thing 
to  be  done.  But  look,  brethren,  as  ye  will  at  this  experience 
of  yours,  you  will  find  something  in  it  which  mocks  the  power 
of  words.  Nor  Moses,  nor  Elijah,  nor  Daniel,  nor  Shadrach 
and  his  companions,  concerned  themselves  about  their  future 
lives,  yet  they  preferred  deserts,  a  lion's  den,  and  a  fiery  fur 
nace  to  all  that  Pharoah,  Ahab,  and  Nebuchadnezzar  had  to 
bestow.  Thus  the  holy  man,  or  the  person  who  is  wholly  of 
God,  stoops  not  to  weigh  the  results  of  his  manliness,  but  is, 
on  the  other  hand,  so  superior  to  those  deeds  which  his  infe 
riors  call  miracles,  that  he  speeds  onward  like  the  sun-god, 
unconscious  of  doing  aught  remarkable.  What  fearful  fate 
is  this  which,  in  the  midst  of  enlightenment  and  evolution 
attained,  makes  people  a  prey  to  the  most  despicable  temp- 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

ters.  The  progressive  individualist  claims  to  have  advanced 
beyond  Christianity.  Is  he  quite  sure  that  he  is  up  to  the 
laws  of  Moses  ?  Yet  have  a  care,  O  World,  concerning 
those  progressive  or  anti-progressive  citizens  of  thine.  There 
may  be,  for  aught  thou  knowest,  prophets  amongst  them  great 
even  as  those  of  ancient  time,  or  there  may  be  mad  conspira 
tors  beneath  thy  splendid  cities  piling  up  kegs  of  the  same 
nitro-glycerine  which  tore  Paris  in  pieces.  But,  not  to  speak 
of  trying  to  distinguish  between  these  friends  and  foes  of  thy 
household,  it  might  be  well  to  ascertain  whether  there  is  any 
difference  between  him  who  is  infidel  to  thy  idols  for  the  sake 
of  being  true  to  his  own  God,  and  him  who  is  false  to  con 
science  for  the  pleasure  of  being  true  to  thee  and  thy  golden 
images.  Methinks  the  spectacle  of  '  Him  crucified,'  winged 
by  a  couple  of  malefactors,  were  lesson  enough.  And  it  were 
well  to  remember  that,  how  great  soever  the  person  who 
comes  to  thee  laden  with  his  Father's  wealth,  his  life,  to  use 
St.  John's  words,  is  the  light  of  men,  not  the  substance  of 
them  ;  for  are  we  not  all,  being  made  in  God's  image,  pos 
sessed  of  the  majesty  of  self-hood  in  some  other  sense  than 
coin  from  the  mint?  What  if  we  ourselves  were  gods,  and 
our  earthly  existence  only  one  of  our  dreams  or  nightmares  ? 
Enoch,  Moses,  Elijah,  Jesus,  it  is  said,  left  no  remains  behind 
them.  They  must  have  gone  back  to  Heaven  in  the  fiery 
chariots  of  their  own  bodies,  the  material  of  their  dreams. 
'  None  of  your  stuff,'  says  the  wise  man.  Does  he  strike  at 
the  idealist  or  the  materialist?  The  dictionaries,  I  notice, 
have  no  compliments  to  spare  for  that  word.  Strange,  that 
those  who  pride  themselves  on  their  matter  should  have  no 
regard  for  their  stuff." 


IX. 

THE   ORIGIN   OF  A  PUBLIC   INSTRUCTOR. 

MR.  SINGLEFACE  naturally  idolized  his  two 
remaining  children,  a  boy  and  a  girl,  and 
gave  great  attention  to  their  spiritual  education. 
But  here  the  bias  of  his  mind,  his  absorbing,  yet 
one-sided,  devotion  to  the  Great  Invisible,  interfered 
with  their  welfare  and  his  own  happiness.  In  his 
treatment  of  them  he  resembled  the  King  in  ^Esop's 
fable,  who,  dreaming  that  his  son  would  be  killed  by 
a  lion,  confined  him  in  a  lonely  tower  for  safe-keep 
ing,  to  the  verification  of  his  dream.  Dread  of  the 
perishable  was  his  dream,  and  his  Creed  the  sup 
posed  tower  of  safety.  A  zealot  himself,  this  gen 
tleman  labored  to  make  zealots  of  his  children, 
while  they,  either  by  reason  of  different  mental 
constitution,  or  that  peculiar  perversity  so  often 
found  in  the  families  of  the  pious,  did  not  appre 
ciate  the  care  lavished  upon  them,  although,  at  the 
same  time,  they  did  not  appear  to  think  their  in 
struction  untrue.  Their  youthful  minds,  taught 
from  infancy  to  regard  the  smallest  doubt  as  a  sug 
gestion  from  Satan,  were  easily  led  into  thoughtless 
acceptance  of  Christian  doctrine,  even  while  their 
sensuous  instincts,  unoccupied  by  the  exercise  of 
Reason,  rebelled  against  it,  manifesting  their  sedi 
tion  in  stolen  self-indulgence.  And  so  occupied 

(144) 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


145 


was  the  parent  in  advocating  Redemption  by  super 
nal  self-sacrifice  that  he  saw  not  the  redeeming 
influence  of  simple  Thought.  Alas  !  society  con 
stantly  repeats  the  experience  of  the  daw  who 
stole  the  peacock's  feathers.  Instead  of  so  living 
that  we,  like  all  genuine  prophets,  may  speak,  as  if 
inspired  by  God,  we  lead  mean  lives,  and  adorn  our 
inferior  thought  with  their  sublime  language,  the 
cast-off  clothing  of  superior  ideas. 

Mr.  Singleface,  it  would  seem,  was  born  a  cen 
tury  too  late ;  for  he  acted  on  a  stage  quite  un suited 
to  his  merits.  In  vain  he  elevated  the  banner  of 
his  humble  faith,  and  energetically  used  the  old- 
fashioned  sword  of  the  Spirit  in  defense  of  his  well- 
beloved  cause.  People  did  not  care  to  follow  him, 
and,  attracted  by  the  flowing  banners  and  brilliant 
weapons  of  the  Buzzes  and  Lullabys,  left  him  for 
them.  Therefore,  as  years  flew  by,  he  had  to 
withdraw  from  the  front  rank  of  the  Lord's  army, 
and,  falling  into  the  rear,  occupied  himself  with  the 
care  of  the  wounded.  He  now  subsisted  on  his 
earnings  as  a  city  missionary.  His  family  attended 
the  church  of  Dr.  Lullaby,  whose  marvelous  creed, 
like  the  pair  of  seven-league  boots  in  the  fairy  tale, 
—  they  fitted  giants  as  well  as  Tom  Thumbs,  —  was 
adapted  to  the  spiritual  dimensions  of  all  Christians. 
And  perhaps  the  manner  and  the  character  of  the 
teaching,  James  and  Mary  Singleface  —  for  so  they 
were  named  —  received  from  that  Knight,  in  addi 
tion  to  their  innate  predisposition  to  error,  pre 
vented  them  from  becoming  so  good  as  their  father 
labored  to  make  them.  But  be  this  as  it  may,  both 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

began,  —  especially  James,  —  at  an  early  age,  to  de 
ceive  him,  and  continued  to  do  so  even  after  they 
had  become  proficient  in  biblical  literature.  And 
they  found  it  an  easy  task ;  for  Mr.  Singleface's 
eyes,  being  ever  fixed  on  the  stars  of  his  Religion, 
could  not  see  the  weeds  which  were  robbing  his 
flowers  of  nourishment.  "  Duty,  duty,  my  son  ; 
prayer,  prayer  to  the  Most  High,"  he  would  say  to 
the  young  man,  while  the  latter,  pious  for  the  mo 
ment,  would  assent,  or  heave  a  sympathetic  sigh,  to 
keep,  as  he  told  a  companion,  the  old  man  in  heart, 
and  then  go  off  on  a  spree. 

It  is  indeed  no  pleasant  task  to  use  the  dissect 
ing  knife  on  so  delicate  a  subject  as  this,  but,  as  our 
vision  has  been  greeted  with  so  much  disorder  of 
the  kind  mentioned,  we  think  it  a  duty  to  draw 
attention  to  it,  leaving  the  application  of  Remedy 
to  the  Reason  of  those  concerned.  Blind  Belief 
has  proved  itself  quite  incompetent. 

Mr.  Singleface's  pet  desire  had  been  to  educate 
his  son  for  the  Church  ;  but  of  late  years  the  con 
duct  of  that  youth  had  been  such  that  he  almost 
despaired  of  his  being  fit  for  that  noble  calling. 
Two  years  ago  James  was  found,  by  a  policeman, 
in  one  of  the  vilest  haunts  in  the  city,  and  brought 
home  intoxicated.  What  a  blow  to  the  innocent 
old  man,  —  all  his  tender  solicitude,  his  tearful  anx 
iety  and  prayer  thus  set  at  naught !  In  the  depth 
of  his  grief  he  wished  that  his  son  never  had  been 
born.  Heart-broken,  he  sought  the  presence  of  God, 
and  there  found  hope  and  consolation  again. 

Mr.  Singleface  saw  at  last  that  he  had  been  a  lit- 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  147 

tie  too  strict  with  James.  He  relaxed  his  exhorta 
tions.  But  it  was  too  late.  Even  into  the  tower 
of  his  creed,  the  lion  had  penetrated.  He  had  so 
worried  him  about  his  soul  that  the  boy  often 
wished  he  never  had  so  inconvenient  an  appen 
dage,  and  hated  all  that  reminded  him  of  it.  The 
gloom  of  his  home  drove  him  to  seek  brightness 
elsewhere,  and,  being  taught  to  think  all  the  world 
was  bad,  he  could  not  discriminate  between  the 
false  and  the  true.  Plants  brought  up  in  the  shade 
must  not  be  thoughtlessly  exposed  to  the  sun. 

James  was  a  good-looking,  slender  youth  of 
twenty-one  at  this  time.  All  danger  of  an  early 
death  from  his  hereditary  complaint  seemed  past. 

Young  Singleface  could  not  but  be  moved  by  the 
sorrow  he  caused  his  father  and  his  sister.  He 
vowed  repentance,  and  henceforward  did  behave 
himself  better.  It  could  not  be  expected  that  a 
weak  son  of  Adam  would  give  up  his  bad  habits  all 
at  once.  We  must  have  indulgence  for  "  miserable 
sinners."  At  least,  so  thought  old  Mr.  Singleface, 
who  was  busy  thanking  his  God  for  the  improve 
ment  visible  in  the  boy,  and  praying  with  renewed 
vigor  that  he  might  become  fit  for  the  sacred  cloth. 

A  sensible  man  might  have  seen  at  a  glance  that 
James  was  not  fit  to  become  a  public  instructor. 
But  the  mind  of  ignorant  piety  has  so  much  faith  in 
its  gods,  and  so  little,  or  indeed  so  much,  in  human 
nature,  that  it  believes  that  the  most  depraved,  with 
the  aid  of  the  Holy  Spirit,  may  become  at  a  mo 
ment's  warning  reliable  preachers  of  what  they  call 
the  Gospel. 


148  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

Not  long  ago  the  wickedest  man  in  Gotham  held 
prayer  meetings  in  his  tavern.  We  cannot  say 
whether  he  ever  brought  any  souls  to  Christ,  but 
we  know  that  he  brought  many  to  himself.  It  is 
quite  common  to  meet  with  young  men  in  the  coun 
try  who  unite  some  profitable  employment  with 
preaching  salvation,  such  as  the  selling  of  maps, 
razors,  prayer-books,  small  tooth  combs,  and  the 
latest  quack  medicine.  We  never  could  tell  wheth 
er  the  preaching  was  to  assist  in  the  sale  of  their 
wares,  or  their  wares  in  the  sale  of  the  preaching. 
We  guess  that  the  latter  must  be  the  correct  view, 
as  we  are  bribed  by  chromos  to  subscribe  to  the 
oldest  and  newest  of  religious  magazines.  We  make 
this  digression  to  illustrate  the  power  of  the  spirit 
as  manifest  in  the  turning  of  indifferently  pious 
characters  into  devotees  of  art  and  manufacture, 
and  vice  -versa.  Jesus  drove  the  money-changers 
from  the  temple.  There  is  now  worse  than  money- 
changing  in  that  place.  Who  will  drive  it  out  ? 

Mr.  Singleface  was  never  tired  of  exhorting  his 
son  to  give  up  all,  and  follow  the  Lord  with  the 
pastor's  crook  in  his  hand. 

Now  James  Singleface  was  not  altogether  a  fool, 
nor  was  he  a  hardened  reprobate.  He  was  simply 
an  ordinary  young  man,  who  loved  a  good  time,  and 
was  not  particular  how  he  got  it. 

He  had  been  looking  about  him  of  late,  and  ob 
serving  what  a  free-and-easy  time  such  as  Oratone 
Buzz  and  Dr.  Lullaby  were  having :  the  truth  sud 
denly  dawned  upon  him  that  the  "  crook "  was  not 
such  a  contemptible  thing. 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  149 

"  I  wonder  if  I  have  a  good  voice,"  was  the  inspi 
ration  of  the  moment :  "  why  can't  I  turn  Deuter 
onomy  and  Lazarus  to  some  account  ? "  How  nat 
ural  for  such  a  youth  in  his  circumstances  to  speak 
thus  !  His  father  was  poor,  his  own  living  was  bad, 
and  his  business  prospects  were  inferior.  Would  it 
not  be  a  good  thing  for  him  ?  As  a  simple  shep 
herd  of  the  Lullaby  school,  he  would  not  have  to 
work  so  hard,  and  with  the  crook  in  his  hand  he 
could  sing  sweetly  to  a  fashionable  flock,  and  be 
well  remunerated  for  his  trouble.  He  blamed  him 
self  for  not  seeing  it  before. 

"  By  Jove  !  "  he  exclaimed  one  day  to  a  compan 
ion  at  the  bar,  —  the  tavern  bar,  —  "the  old  man 
wants  me  to  enter  the  Vineyard  of  the  Lord.  What 
do  you  say  to  it,  William  ? " 

William  was  one  of  those  fat,  indolent,  lethargic 
customers  who,  if  they  be  only  vouchsafed  cigars, 
lager  beer,  "The  Huberton  Herald,"  and  enough 
scrip  in  their  wallets  to  pay  their  week's  board,  are 
content  to  dream  or  babble  away  their  existence  in 
a  saloon,  only  awakening  to  a  sense  of  realities  on 
election  days,  or  at  a  call  from  the  bar-tender  to 
participate  in  that  delectable  Yankee  entertainment 
called  "  poultry  raffling,"  or  on  a  notice  to  quit  from 
a  landlady  whose  creed  is  not  favorable  to  late 
hours.  In  answer  to  James'  question,  William  be 
gan  by  discharging  a  volume  of  smoke,  and,  looking 
up,  seemed  lost  in  thought  for  a  moment.  Then, 
giving  his  head  an  astute  turn  to  one  side,  he  looked 
at  his  friend,  and  laconically  said,  "You  might  do 
worse." 


ISO  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

"  I'm  blessed  if  I  mightn't,"  was  the  hasty  reply 
of  the  impulsive  James.  "  But,  confound  the  thing, 
I  ain't  pious  enough  !  " 

"It  will  come,"  said  the  sententious  William,  with 
a  glance  that  indicated  a  vast  fund  of  inward  con 
viction,  which  he  valued  so  highly  that  he  seemed 
desirous  of  keeping  it  all  to  himself. 

"  How  the  deuce  will  it  come  ? "  inquired  the 
youth,  taking  the  remnant  of  his  cigar  out  of  his 
mouth,  and  flinging  it  upon  the  saw-dust  covered 
floor.  "  I  don't  see  my  way  very  clearly." 

"  Go  to  Jesus  and  cultivate  your  voice,"  was  the 
dry  response,  delivered  with  mock  gravity.  "  If  I 
didn't  sta-m-m-er,  I  would  have  been  in  the  minis 
try  long  ago." 

James  had  no  difficulty  in  understanding  William. 
He  had  often  deceived  his  father  and  he  could  easily 
deceive  the  public  also.  But  did  his  conscience  not 
tell  him  that  he  was  about  to  make  a  whited  sepul 
chre  of  himself?  It  did  and  it  did  not.  How 
could  his  reason  or  other  gift  of  insight  penetrate 
the  obscurity  of  the  superstition  in  which  he  had 
been  brought  up !  He  knew  it  was  wrong  to  lie. 
But  he  did  not  see  that  he  was  going  to  lie.  He 
coaxed  himself  into  the  belief  that  he  was,  as  he 
termed  it,  going  in  for  Christian  truth.  "  I  am 
indeed,"  he  felt,  "  rather  a  tough  candidate  for  the 
cloth,  but  are  we  not  all  miserable  sinners  ?  I  do 
not  know  that  I  am  any  worse  than  the  rest  of 
them.  In  entering  the  ministry  I  -only  do  the  best 
I  can  for  the  Lord  and  myself.  Religion  is  not 
hard  to  be  got.  I  have  often  felt  a  mysterious  all- 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY,  151 

overishness  within  me,  exhorting  me  to  rise  and 
proclaim  aloud  the  praise  of  my  Maker." 

He  acquainted  his  father  with  his  resolution. 
The  old  gentleman  was  delighted  with  this  unex 
pected  intelligence.  He  felt  it  to  be  a  special  inter 
position  of  the  Almighty  in  his  favor.  He  had  no 
idea  how  much  lethargic  William,  and  other  little 
secularities  of  his  son  had  to  do  with  it. 

James  had  been  in  the  college  for  some  time 
before  Malcolm  came  to  it.  At  first  he  was  not 
very  favorably  received  on  account  of  the  little 
looseness  that  still  clung  to  him.  But  latterly  it 
was  different,  and  the  Faculty  appeared  to  think 
that  the  apostolic  mantle  of  his  father  was  about  to 
descend  upon  his  shoulders.  What  splendid  essays 
he  wrote  on  the  miracles,  Peter,  Paul,  and  the  beauty 
of  his  Redeemer's  character! 

However,  notwithstanding  his  natural  abilities 
and  the  pious  tone  of  his  discourse,  he  continued  to 
evince  a  fondness  for  lethargic  William  and  the 
genial  pursuits  of  that  citizen.  He  paid  him  many 
surreptitious  visits. 

Yet,  so  struck  were  Tightcreed,  Lullaby,  and 
Buzz  with  the  beauty  of  his  prayers,  and  the  ele 
gance  of  his  speech  about  his  dear  Saviour,  that  he 
was  among  the  first  to  participate  in  the  delights 
of  preaching  in  this  benighted  or  enlightened  (which 
ever  you  please)  portion  of  the  globe  at  so  much  a 
Sunday. 

Here  is  an  instance  of  the  character  of  James,  to 
show  how  little  pious  words  have  to  do  with  genu 
ine  fervor  of  soul.  He  invited  several  students  into 


152  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

his  room  to  hear  him  read  an  essay  on  Marcus 
Aurelius.  While  some  looked  over  his  shoulders, 
and  others  lounged  about  the  room,  he  sat  at  the 
window  and  read  the  product  of  his  labor  in  unctu 
ous  tones.  He  had  come  to  the  end  of  this  passage, 
which  we  quote  verbatim  :  — 

"  With  what  distress  of  soul,  dearly  beloved  brethren,  we 
regard  the  fact  that  Marcus  Aurelius,  in  full  view  of  the 
heroism  evinced  by  the  Christian  martyrs,  notwithstanding 
the  many  opportunities  he  had  of  embracing  the  truth  of 
Christ,  and  thus  earning  himself  a  seat  before  the  throne  of 
Heaven,  remained  to  the  end  of  his  days  a  cold,  callous  "  — 

Just  at  this  moment  a  pretty  girl  passed  the  window 
and  stopped  on  the  sidewalk  evidently  to  wait  for 
the v  horse-cars.  James  Singleface's  falcon  eye  saw 
her,  and,  stopping  short,  he  cried  out,  "  Quick,  boys, 
Brown,  Jones,  here !  quick !  Look  at  that  pretty  girl, 
ain't  she  a  beauty?"  Marcus  was  forgotten  at  once, 
and  five  heads  were  instantaneously  congregated  in 
the  window,  where  they  contemplated  with  the  most 
orthodox  delight  the  said  phenomenon.  In  five 
minutes  James  returned  to  his  essay,  and,  resuming 
the  pious  tone,  finished  the  period  with  the  word 
"philosopher."  It  was  pretty  evident  that  he  did 
not  intend  to  remain  to  the  end  of  his  days  a  "  cold, 
callous  philosopher."  His  Christianity  would  not 
admit  of  such  heathenism. 


X. 


THREE  DOLLARS   AND   COSTS. 

WERE  you  ever  in  a  public  court  ?  There  is 
where  we  first  saw  astute,  lethargic  William. 
He  was  fined  three  dollars  and  costs,  as  were  a  host 
of  others.  Three  dollars  and  costs,  —  and  costs,  — 
how  dolefully  these  words  reverberate  in  our  minds, 
and,  like  the  presence  of  the  spectre  at  the  feast, 
quell  the  mirth  that  ought  to  reign  over  the  board ! 

Alas  William,  thou  art  not  the  only  sufferer.  Avert 
thy  wrath  from  the  scowling,  or  as  it  may  be  jocular, 
justice,  pro  tempore,  and  visit  it  elsewhere.  Canst 
thou  count  ?  Yes.  Well,  count  the  cost  of  thy  act 
of  intemperance.  Canst  thou  not,  by  any  stretch 
of  imagination,  get  beyond  the  lucre  to  cost  of 
another  kind  ?  William,  thou  hast  sowed  the  wind 
and  art  a  raiser  of  whirlwinds  which  the  whole 
world  must  help  thee  to  reap,  for  humanity  is  one 
and  has  a  common  barn  for  the  storing  of  woe 
as  well  as  of  weal.  How  true  thy  slang,  "  to  raise 
the  wind,"  and  thou  art  but  one  of  the  humblest 
sowers  of  that  terrible  seed  ! 

Therefore  the  actual  costs  of  our  vices  are 
the  plagues  that  turn  our  common  weal,  even  as 
they  turned  Egypt's,  into  common  woe ;  and  yet  we 
chuckle  if  we  are  only  mulcted  in  the  costs,  and 
triumphantly  jingle  the  saved  coin  in  our  pockets. 

(iS3) 


154  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

What  turned  our  Southern  rivers  into  blood,  and 
peopled  the  Southern  plains  with  skeletons  ?  What 
brought  the  frog-like  shoddies,  the  swarms  of  fly 
and  centipede-like  quacks,  the  locust-like  hypo 
crites  to  prey  upon  our  greenness  and  our  sweet 
ness  ?  Nor  is  the  darkness  gone,  nor  has  Azrael 
ceased  to  rob  us  of  our  first-born  and  of  our  sec 
ond,  and  yet,  in  full  view  of  this  terrible  growth  of 
Death,  whose  every  leaf  is  a  pestilence,  we  become 
bereft  of  wonder  and  merely  sigh  as  the  apples 
thereof  fall  in  the  midst  of  the  community.  Three 
dollars  and  infinite  woe.  We  tell  thee,  O  William, 
and  all  you  that  premeditate  an  act  of  vice,  however 
insignificant  it  may  seem  to  you,  that  the  conse 
quential  damages  are  worthy  of  note.  Therefore 
withhold  your  anger  from  the  external  inflicter  of  dis 
tress,  and  hoard  it  for  another,  whom  neither  Ora- 
tone  Buzz  nor  Dr.  Lullaby  can  appease,  —  namely, 
your  own  evil  propensities. 

This  world  of  ours  is  an  enchanted  palace,  and  we 
are  all  half  marble  and  half  men,  like  the  King  of 
the  Black  Isles,  in  the  Arabian  tale.  But  are  we 
all  worthy  of  being  compared  with  that  dignified 
monarch  ? 

We  have  often  seen  men  that  resembled  wheel 
barrows,  and  not  respectable,  sound  wheelbarrows 
either,  but  very  inferior  ones  with  the  wheels  askew. 
Did  you  never  see  one  of  those  vehicles  asleep,  up 
right  on  its  shafts  under  the  lee  of  a  barn,  without 
being  reminded  of  a  fop  in  a  frock  coat  leaning 
against  a  lamp  post  in  a  fit  of  drunken  inanition  ? 
His  is  a  terrible  fate.  How  can  he  return  to  his 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


155 


vileness,  warned  against  it  as  he  is.  But  what  is 
the  use  of  preaching,  if  the  conscience  of  the  com 
munity  is  debauched  ?  A  hypocrite  —  the  greatest 
of  all  —  is  unmasked,  but  this,  far  from  taking  away 
his  popularity,  doubles  it  at  once.  But  the  severity 
of  the  law  continues  to  those  who  have  neither  wealth 
nor  fame  nor  eloquence  to  gild  their  sinfulness.  Is 
this  answer  to  charges  of  social  delinquency  not 
justified  by  living  examples?  "I  am  stronger  than 
the  Truth.  The  whole  republic  will  gather' itself  to 
gether  at  my  command,  and  roll  itself  like  the  del 
uge  upon  you.  Do  you  think  it  will  see  me,  its 
guide  in  war,  its  prophet  in  peace,  the  pride  of  its 
religion,  perish  like  an  ordinary  minister  of  the  gos 
pel  ?  No  !  Even  as  the  northern  lights  shine  night 
after  night,  crowning  the  mountains  with  magnifi 
cence,  I  shall  stand  inaccessible  to  reproach.  The 
nation  is  mine,  and  I  will  pit  its  vulgar  omnipo 
tence  against  your  spiteful  truthfulness  ;  and  even 
if  my  heart  should  be  spiked  again  and  again,  and 
in  its  agony  burst  open,  I  will  endure  unto  the  end  ; 
for  in  spite  of  all  my  naughtiness,  I  am  one  of  those 
little  children  to  whom  the  kingdom  is  revealed." 

Strain  away,  O  Public,  at  your  gnats,  and  swal 
low  your  camels  till  you  have  had  your  fill.  If  the 
hated  Paris  of  the  South  should  suffer  woe  unut 
terable  for  meddling  with  the  dusky  Helen  of  King 
Sambo,  what  shall  be  done  to  him  of  the  North  who 
blackens  the  white  wives  of  his  neighbors  ?  There 
are  dead  men's  bones  under  that  flaming  crown  of 
the  frigid  north,  the  aurora  borealis.  But  a  little 
more  progressive  bungling,  and  you  will  find  the 


156  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

short  cut  to  Paradise,  the  celebrated  northwest  pas 
sage,  so  necessary  to  spiritual  commerce.  But  you 
need  for  the  voyage  a  little  more  scrip  than  the 
Master  recommends.  Yet  one  of  the  said  "  little 
children "  may  lend  you  one  of  his  fast  horses  or 
yachts  to  make  the  experiment,  —  he  cares  so  little 
for  the  things  of  this  world.  But  it  may  be  objected 
by  the  religious,  that  the  horse  is  a  sacred  animal, 
and  that  the  ancient  Egyptians  were  right  in  dedi 
cating  it  to  God  ;  and  that  so  fine  a  symbol  of 
divinity  ought  not  to  be  used  as  a  beast  of  burden 
for  ordinary  men.  Therefore,  let  there  be  high 
priests  and  imposing  edifices  in  honor  of  its  spir 
itual  significance,  for  it  is  of  the  utmost  importance 
to  the  human  soul,  in  its  present  fallen  condition, 
that  it  should  become  alive  to  God,  as  he  is  revealed 
in  a  magnificent  stud.  And  in  regard  to  yachts, 
oyster  suppers,  Burgundy,  &c.,  would  it  not  be  a 
good  thing  to  sanctify  them  unto  the  Lord,  as  pecu 
liar  institutions,  predestined  for  the  exclusive  use  of 
the  high  priests,  as  were  of  yore  the  tidbits  of  the 
sacrificial  lambs,  after  Jehovah's  nostrils  had  been 
duly  gratified  ?  In  this  case,  then,  we  might  be  enter 
tained  with  less  scandal,  and  the  first  steps  taken  to 
inaugurate  the  millennium.  If  Mohammed  went  to 
heaven  on  an  ass,  why  should  we  not  be  content 
with  that  mode  of  transit,  and  willingly  accord  to 
a  popular  progressive  the  privilege  of  a  fast  horse, 
and  of  such  refreshment  as  would  enable  him  to 
perform  the  extra  duty  of  pioneer  ? 

But  count  the  costs,  count  the  costs.     We  tried 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  157 

to  smile,  but  could  not,  when,  a  few  days  ago,  we 
paid,  in  heavier  coin  than  in  that  of  the  mint,  a  tax 
bill  of  another  sort  from  that  marked  U.S.  Our  heads 
are  very  apt  to  be  in  moonshine  while  our  feet,  or 
what  is  worse,  our  hearts,  are  in  very  objectionable 
places.  Mr.  Singleface  is  not  an  isolated  phenom 
enon.  "  But,"  one  says,"  I  feel  certain  that  I  will 
escape  the  costs."  We  sincerely  hope  he  will.  An 
engineer  said  so,  or  something  like  it,  before  his 
native  city  followed  the  example  of  another,  and 
burned  itself  to  the  ground.  Let  those  that  stand 
or  sit,  even  as  high  as  the  chair  of  the  great  Conti 
nental  Miracle  Protection  Association  and  speculate 
in  gold  and  whjskies,  take  heed,  for  who  knows 
what  to-morrow  may  bring  with  its  dawn.  A  friend 
of  ours  caught,  during  the  night  of  the  fire,  a  little 
boy  in  his  bedroom  setting  fire  to  it.  Probably  he 
had  sinned  once  himself,  for  he  only  thrust  the 
incendiary  out  of  doors.  Who  owns  that  boy,  and 
who  is  there  to  shed  a  tear  over  him  ?  The  whole 
world  is  responsible  for  him  and  shall  suffer  from 
him,  even  as  he  who  cleanseth  not  himself  shall 
suffer  from  vermin. 

What  is  going  on  in  the  vineyard  of  the  Lord,  or 
the  nursery  of  the  soul  ?  We  hear  a  song.  Dr. 
Lullaby -by-by-by,  Dr.  'Lullaby,  thou  rockest  a  ten 
der  baby  in  that  cradle  of  thine.  But  what  is  that 
that  I  see  ?  Serpents  —  spoon-headed,  dragon-bellied, 
diamond-eyed,  and  with  horrible  fangs  —  quite  close 
to  its  pillow.  They  are  charmed  and  even  sent 
asleep  by  thy  splendid  voice.  Thou  puttest  forth 
thy  hand  as  if  to  cut  away  their  poison  bags,  when 


1 58  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

behold,  they  shake  themselves,  and  heaps  of  golden 
scales  cover  the  floor.  Remember  where  thou  art. 
Would  that  thy  baby  had  the  strength  of  the  infant 
Hercules  ! 


XL 

A  RADICAL  LOVE  LETTER. 

MALCOLM  returned,  as  we  said,  to  his  room 
reproaching  himself  for  his  infidelity  to  the 
Truth,  and  firmly  resolved  to  write  no  more  loving 
epistles  about  his  Redeemer. 

What  did  he  intend  to  do  ?  He  hardly  knew 
himself.  With  his  anti-traditional  sentiments  he 
could  no  longer  accept  the  bounty  of  Mr.  Crisp,  nor 
hope  that  that  miracle  protector  would  rise  above 
his  prejudices  and  accept  him  for  a  son-in-law. 
And  Jennie !  To  her  whom  he  loved  so  well  he 
would  have  to  bid  farewell,  probably  forever,  as  it 
would  take  him  many  years  to  work  himself  into  a 
position  that  would  enable  him  to  support  her. 
How  would  she  take  this  change  in  his  views,  his 
resignation  of  the  profession  that  was  to  constitute 
his  claim  to  her  hand  ! 

He  remembered  how  hard  she  had  fought  with 
her  father  in  his  behalf,  how  tender  and  true  she 
was  to  him,  notwithstanding  her  religious  preposses 
sions  (what  could  he  expect  from  her  age  ?),  how  all 
her  little  plans  of  future  happiness  were  bound  up 
with  his  well-doing ;  and  he  almost  writhed  in  pain 
at  the  thought  of  offending  her,  of  destroying  the 
solid-looking  air  castles  she  had  built  for  them  both. 
She  would  never  be  able  to  understand  his  position 

(i59) 


!<5o  RAINBOW  AND   REALITY. 

or  the  true  character  of  his  resolution,  as  she  had 
been  brought  up  to  believe  even  doubt  of  revela 
tion  a  sin  against  the  Holy  Spirit.  "A  faithful  infi 
del,"  said  he  :  "  but  these  words  have  puzzled  wiser 
heads  than  hers.  Yet  I  will  write  and  learn."  So 
he  wrote :  — 

DEAREST  JOY  OF  MY  LIFE, — 

Thou  who  art  more  to  me  than  any  earthly  good,  since  I 
love  thee  with  the  Spirit  I  have  from  God,  hear  how  I  de 
ceived  thee  for  the  convenience  of  the  day,  to  the  lasting 
perdition  of  us  both.  Verily,  'tis  a  hard  task  that  I  have 
chosen  to  confess  myself  thus  ;  for  1  know  not  how  I  shall 
regain  the  place  in  thy  esteem  which  this  confession  of  mine 
may  cause  me  to  forfeit  as  just  punishment  for  my  sin.  But 
even  if  I  lose  it  and  thee  forever,  I  must  be  true  to  my  best 
thought  and  purest  aspiration  to  remove  from  my  mind  the 
burden  of  my  guilt.  Canst  thou  believe  me.  dearest,  when  I 
tell  thee  that  I,  Malcolm.  I  whom  thou  hast  chosen  to  com 
plete  the  circle  of  thy  life,  have  been  for  some  time  past  a 
sorry  fool  and  a  conscious  cheat  ?  God,  in  a  direct  ray  from 
himself,  revealed  to  me  the  sacred  duty  of  the  hour,  yet  I 
turned  away  from  the  vision  of  glory  and  followed  an  evil  of 
my  own  choice.  Yes,  voluntarily,  and  in  the  full  knowledge 
that  I  was  injuring  myself  and  all  those  with  whom  I  am  con 
nected,  I  pandered  to  a  sensual  superstition  in  that  I  pre 
tended  to  believe  a  creed  against  which  every  fibre  of  my  con 
science  rebelled.  And  this  did  1  with  that  cowardice  of  soul 
which  said,  "  Fear  and  tremble,  evanescent  spark  of  life  infe 
rior,  for  Force,  in  all  his  power  and  glory,  is  there  ;  and, 
behold,  in  his  right  hand  is  Pleasure,  and  in  his  left  Pain. 
.Bow  down  before  him,  as  the  winds  fan  the  knees  of  the 
mountains,  and  the  mountains  themselves  bristle  and  cower 
in  his  presence,  while  the  seas  rise  up  in  terror."  And  I 
did  bow  down  before  him  and  worship  him  according  to  his 
image,  as  graven  in  the  books  of  the  church.  But  now  I 
repent  and  am  glad ;  for  I  am  myself  again. 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  jgj 

So  much,  then,  dearest  one,  for  the  poetic  view  of  my  sin, 
—  please  to  hear  the  prose.  To  lie  was  cheap  and  conven 
ient  :  so  much  so,  indeed,  that,  fearful  of  losing  you,  and 
dreading  discovery  more  than  death,  I  followed  the  example 
of  Bungle  and  Buzz,  and  lied  so  well  that  men  called  me  or 
thodox  to  the  backbone.  Or,  in  other  words,  to  please  the 
people,  and  particularly  the  faculty  of  the  college,  that  I 
might  as  soon  as  possible  enter  the  joy  of  their  Lord,  I  sinned 
against  my  own  Holy  Spirit ;  for  truly,  up  to  the  hour  of  my 
lapse,  my  purpose  was  pure  and  whole.  Here  you  have  the 
plain  facts,  and  I  have  no  excuse  to  offer,  save  the  hope  that 
I  was  not  myself  when  I  acted  in  this  way  ;  or  the  possibility 
that  your  fair  image  took  on  a  false  blazon,  which  so  enchant 
ed  me  that  I  could  see  no  Divinity  but  itself.  Now,  had  I 
loved  you  truly,  this  had  not  happened,  and  the  apple  re 
mained  uneaten.  The  first  suggestion  of  Deceit  that  I 
yielded  to  robbed  you  of  my  love,  and  hid  it  in  the  house  of 
Mammon.  Your  father,  good,  kind,  charitable  as  he  is,  has 
built  a  high  altar  to  his  particular  God  ;  and  I,  with  the  vanity 
of  my  profession,  looked  forward  with  delight  to  the  sinecure 
of  high  priest.  But  now,  thank  the  realization  of  my  folly  as 
it  is  visible  in  others,  my  eyes  are  open,  and  I  come  again 
into  harmony  with  a  clear  conscience  and  an  upright  under 
standing.  A  lie  is  a  lie,  no  matter  how  brilliantly  written  or 
done,  and  it  seemed  to  me  yesterday,  after  sending  you  a 
Christinas  gift,  that,  if  I  did  not  undeceive  you,  it  was  the 
same  as  if  I  had  concealed  a  serpent  in  the  case.  I  know  it  is 
false  to  suffer  people  to  believe  that  the  Scriptures  were  plena- 
rily  inspired ;  that  Jesus,  the  son  of  Mary,  was  one  with  God 
in  some  peculiar  mode  of  being  unshared  by  others  ;  that  it 
is  essential  to  salvation  to  believe  the  miracles  and  other 
traditions  ;  that  the  Christian  is  the  only  mode  of  salvation 
capable  of  saving  us  from  Eternal  Punishment ;  and  that  Chris 
tianity  and  no  other  religion  had  its  source  in  genuine  revela 
tion  from  God,  &c.  Therefore,  even  to  retain  your  love  and 
find  everlasting  favor  in  the  sight  of  your  father,  I  have  no 
right  to  accept  the  articles  of  his  creed  and  burn  incense  on 
the  altars  of  his  God ;  for  my  whole  service  belongs  to  Him 
il 


Z62  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

who  lives,  moves,  and  has  his  being  in  all  worthy  persons 
as  well  as  they  in  Him.  Do  not  think  that  I,  in  such  a  Babel 
of  theology  and  purblind  dilettanteism  as  this,  am  weak  enough 
to  discuss  the  question  of  Jehovah  or  Christ  or  any  other  per 
son  who  symbolizes  in  himself  the  Creator  of  the  Universe. 
That,  indeed,  may  not  be  below  the  dignity  of  the  Bishops  of 
world  and  the  great  editors  of  New  Humbleton  journals,  but 
it  certainly  is  infinitely  beneath  mine.  So,  as  you  see,  I  only 
protest  against  the  degrading  superstition  and  the  altogether 
inadequate  thought  of  both  church  and  school,  which  hides 
from  the  people,  in  stereotyped  forms  and  artificial  speech,  a 
greater  knowledge  of  simple  goodness.  It  is  not  the  poor 
carpenter's  son  of  Judea,  who  went  about  doing  good  in  the 
most  whole-souled  manner,  and  with  the  most  absorbing  en 
thusiasm,  but  the  Heir-apparent  of  the  throne  of  Heaven,  who 
condescended  to  share  for  a  season  the  state  of  spirit  incar 
nate,  that  compels  their  worship.  But,  whether  I  am  right  or 
wrong,  in  respect  of  theology  or  any  other  criticism,  is  not  the 
point  just  now,  save  in  so  far  as  the  honest  declaration  of  my 
thought  helps  you  to  understand  what  I  have  done.  How 
ever,  it  is  obvious  enough  that  I  have  sinned  terribly,  and 
in  such  a  way  that  I  may  not  gain  credence  for  my  present 
utterance  ;  and  it  has  been  quite  in  vain.  Although  the  door 
of  Pleasure  stood  open,  my  heart  misgave  me.  and  I  could  not 
enter  to  receive  the  reward  of  my  treachery.  No  :  although 
that  reward  was  the  certain  clasp  of  your  own  fair  hand,  and  a 
close  gaze  into  your  pure  eyes.  Ay,  even  with  you  who  are 
to  me  the  princess  of  angels,  on  pavements  of  gold,  my  sin 
would  find  us  out  to  our  inevitable  doom.  To  say  that  "the 
wages  of  sin  is  death,"  covers  all  time  and  space,  and  makes 
this  earth  seem  but  a  pound  where  God  imprisons  those  whom 
sin  turns  to  worse  than  cattle,  till  the  damage  is  paid.  Thus, 
while  I  now  seem  to  speed  from  your  arms,  can  you  not  see 
that  it  is  for  our  infinite  good  ?  What  would  I  gain  if  I  pur 
chased  your  hand  with  false  speech  and  lived  the  lie  I  ut 
tered  ?  Would  not  my  love  become  your  curse,  and  yours 
mine?  O  man  of  little  faith  that  I  was!  I  gazed  Heaven 
ward,  although  I  only  beheld  the  callous  clouds  and  the  im 
placable  blue  of  the  sky,  while  my  heart  was  void  of  purity 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


and  given  up  to  vanity.  And  I  talked  of  my  Lord,  and  craved 
his  blessing  upon  me,  even  while  I  closed  my  conscience  with 
conceit,  and  shut  my  soul  with  a  lie.  But  you,  dearest,  if  you 
did  not  see,  felt  through  the  mask  of  my  deceit  ;  for  the  tone 
of  my  letters  made  you  sad.  Blessed  sadness  !  How  I  love  you 
for  it  !  But  hear  me  speak  more  calmly  about  my  thought. 

\Vhnt  is  the  worship  of  God  as  he  is  manifest  in  the  Christ 
of  Nazareth  ?  Is  it  the  acceptance  of  any  scholastic  statement 
or  conventional  notion  as  to  his  being,  his  place  in  the  Trin 
ity,  the  authenticity  of  his  miracles,  with  due  appreciation  of 
his  self-sacrifice,  in  particular,  —  no  matter  how  little  one  pos 
sesses  himself,  —  with  tender  consideration  for  the  dogmas 
woven  around  his  name  ?  Or  is  it  simply  the  genuine  love  and 
reverence  which  such  a  character  as  Jesus'  naturally  inspires 
in  the  bosom  of  all  who  come  within  its  influence  ?  What 
more  can  I  say  than  that  I  will  strive  to  worship  the  same 
Holiness  of  Spirit  which  has  blessed  all  nations  and  tribes 
with  forms  of  religion  in  consonance  with  the  merits  of  each  ? 
But  look,  Jennie,  into  these  things  for  yourself,  and  you  will 
see  to  what  extent  the  world  bows  down  before  the  true  God, 
and  to  what  extent  before  the  graven  images  of  Madam  De- 
morest,  and  Spruce,  Cut  &  Co.  Excuse  the  satire,  and  do  not 
think  I  blame  you  ;  for  such  as  Pluffle,  the  parrots  of  the 
Bible,  have  not  been  eager  to  enlighten  you  in  this  matter,  in 
spite  of  all  their  talk  about  the  vanities  of  this  wicked  world 
of  theirs.  I  fear  you  will  have  to  ascend  the  mountains  of 
Christian  Progress  yourself.  I  liked  that  letter,  but  there 
was  a  careless  ring  about  it  that  I  did  not  admire.  I  hope  my 
infidelity  to  myself  did  not  infect  you.  You  talk  of  religion 
as  glibly  as  a  school  girl  about  a  new  book,  or  as  if  you,  as  I, 
had  to  look  to  it  for  bread.  And  you  speak  of  sinners  being 
turned  into  black  stones,  —  excellent  comparison,  forsooth,  — 
but  do  you  realize  what  it  means  ?  Could  you  have  shared 
such  a  fate  with  me  ?  Ah,  you  shrink  in  horror  from  the 
thought,  and  well  you  may,  for  you  have  had  a  narrow  escape. 
To  secure  you,  such  was  my  impatience  that  I  enlisted  in  Sa 
tan's  army  and  became  a  theological  sharpshooter  with  a  pre 
ternatural  rifle,  and  the  Bible  for  a  cartridge-box.  And  I 
intrenched  myself  behind  a  ''  Rock  of  ages  "  of  error,  and  fired 


1 64  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

at  the  hearts  of  the  Infidels,  so-called.  Fortunately,  however, 
most  of  my  cartridges  were  blank  ;  and,  on  hearing  the  empty 
report,  I  even  laughed  myself  to  scorn.  Just  think  of  the 
killed  !  Shot  through  the  head  with  miracles.  For  a  truth, 
"  blessed  are  the  dead  which  die  in  the  Lord."  But  I  re 
ceived  a  severe  blow  from  one  Shaft,  as  you  may  perceive. 

How  applicable  your  parable  of  Mt.  Christian  Progress  ! 
Can't  you  make  it  a  little  bigger,  Jennie  ?  Say  Progress 
alone,  or  Mt.  Restoration.  Heaven  may  be  something  to 
regain  as  well  as  something  new  to  acquire.  'Tis  true  that 
we  are  infinitely  obliged  to  those  who  help  us  to  ascend,  or 
guide  us  thither.  But  have  we  not  principally  to  look  to 
our  own  limbs  ?  Is  it  not  better  to  be  gods  ourselves 
than  to  remain  mere  individuals,  content  with  some  faint 
images  vouchsafed  by  Supernal  Powers  ?  Thus,  in  the 
light  of  this  thought,  your  mountain  looms  infinitely  high  ; 
and  behold,  that  loftiness  is  in  our  own  minds,  and  we  can 
not  see  where  Christ,  with  his  deathless  body,  ceased  to  ascend 
that  he  might  rest  content  with  the  sweets  of  the  Universe  in 
halls  of  glory,  surrounded  by  the  countless  host  of  his  wor 
shipers,  unless  it  be  here  in  this  world.  But  a  fatal  spell 
keeps  people  from  reaching  the  mystic  heights  which  he 
ascended  with  other  holy  men  of  old  that  he  might  find 
new  treasures  for  his  brethren.  And  I  cannot  help  com 
paring  the  Church,  in  her  superstition,  with  Charlemagne 
of  the  legend.  That  emperor  had  rather  a  plain  mistress 
whose  influence  over  him  was  due  to  the  possession  of  a 
magic  ring ;  and  this  infatuation  continued,  even  after  her 
death,  so  that  he  would  not  suffer  the  corpse  to  be  removed 
from  his  room.  This  induced  a  servant  to  suspect  the  pres 
ence  of  witchcraft,  and  on  searching  for  the  charm  the  ring 
was  found  under  the  tongue.  It  was  removed  ;  and  then  Char 
lemagne  inquired,  for  the  first  time,  why  the  dead  body  was 
not  taken  away  at  once.  See  to  it,  dearest :  who  knows  what 
fatal  witchery  is  in  the  tongues  of  Pluffle,  Bungle,  and  Buzz. 

Yours  forever, 

MALCOLM. 


XII. 

A  BRAND   NEW  PUBLIC   INSTRUCTOR. 

MALCOLM  had  barely  finished  this  letter, 
when  some  one  entered.  It  was  James 
Singleface,  who  had  come  to  see  some  new  books 
which  temporarily  lay  in  Malcolm's  private  room  — 
a  present  from  one  of  the  supporters  of  the  institu 
tion.  James  was  looking  particularly  happy,  as  if 
something  had  occurred  to  please  him,  and  he  was 
in  a  talkative  mood. 

"  What  do  you  think  of  the  college,  Malcolm  ? " 
he  began,  throwing  himself  into  a  chair  by  the  stove 
and  putting  his  feet  upon  the  mantel. 

"Think!"  ejaculated  Malcolm,  turning  round.  "I 
think  that  I  am  in  the  wrong  box.  I  am  not  clay,  or, 
if  I  were,  I  should  have  no  desire  to  be  moulded 
after  the  pattern  of  Bungle  or  Lullaby,  and  stamped 
with  the  seal  of  the  Continental  Miracle  Protection 
Association.  I  leave  next  week." 

"What!"  exclaimed  James,  opening  his  incredu 
lous  eyes,  for  he  was  not  ignorant  of  his  friend's  cir 
cumstances.  "  You  are  joking.  Leave  the  college, 
with  your  rhetorical  power !  why,  my  dear  fellow, 
you  might  make  your  fortune  in  the  ministry." 

"  And  lose  one,"  resumed  Malcolm.  "  No  :  the 
current  traditions  are  sheer  frauds  in  a  great  meas 
ure,  aid  I  feel  compelled  to  say  so.  If  you  saw  a 

(165) 


1 66  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

forger  cheat  a  poor  man,  would  you  hesitate  to 
interfere  ?" 

"The  voice  of  mock  martyrdom  again!  Rather 
than  go  to  Heaven  on  the  Church  passport,  you 
would  give  up  the  whole  world  !  More  fool  you. 
If  the  miracles  of  the  Lord  are  forgeries,  blessed 
forgeries,  say  I." 

"  Blessed  poison,  virtuous  vice,  delicious  damna 
tion  ! "  exclaimed  Malcolm,  fairly  aroused. 

"  Why  not  ?  "  said  James,  patronizingly.  "  Where 
is  your  Hegel  ?  Does  he  not  teach  that  all  Truth 
lies  in  the  synthesis  of  contradictions  ?  Homoe 
opathy  proves  the  blessings  of  poison.  Vicious 
men  have  a  self-sacrificing  virtue,  inasmuch  as  they 
exhibit  in  themselves  the  havoc  of  vice  ;  and  is  it 
not  a  '  delicious  damnation '  to  be  doomed  to  the 
pleasures  of  this  wicked  world  of  ours,  —  eh  ?" 

"  You  reason  well,  James  ;  but  think  again.  The 
success  of  homoeopathy  consists  in  taking  the  small 
est  possible  quantities  of  poison  ;  and  the  self- 
destruction  of  the  fool  attests  the  extent  of  his  be 
nevolence  and  the  price  paid  for  the  lesson  taught  ; 
and  as  for  your  '  delicious  damnation,'  can  you  rejoice 
in  the  emasculation  of  soul  which  it  costs  ? " 

"  So  you  believe  in  a  veritable  Devil  ?  " 

"  No  :  I  disown  him  heartily  ;  but  the  trouble  is 
he  won't  disown  me,  save  in  so  far  as  he  is  manifest 
in  the  like  of  you." 

"  What's  the  use  of  talking  with  you,  Malcolm  ? 
This  trickiness  of  speech,  this  absurd  sophistry  of 
yours,  does  not  become  a  Christian  and  a  gentle 
man.  Elevate  your  spiritual  standard.  I  believe 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


Christ,  and  all  that  savors  of  'him  crucified.'  And 
our  teachers  are  the  select  men  of  the  nation.  How 
can  they  be  wrong,  and  such  an  undisciplined  piece 
of  radical  insignificance  as  you  be  right  ?" 

"  That's  the  point.  I'd  rather  give  myself  to  the 
crows  than  fawn  upon  the  King  of  kings." 

"Ah,  Infidelity  is  so  wearing,  and  there  is  com 
fort  and  dignity  in  the  cloth." 

"  There's  dignity  in  infinite  cruelty,  and  comfort 
in  the  blackfly  that  buzzes  around  and,  settling, 
preys  on  the  back  of  a  heifer.  Can't  you  hear 
poor  lo  low  ?  Whence  the  immoralities  which  dis 
grace  your  cloth  ?  Not  all  the  brains  of  the  coun 
try,  compressed  into  flattery  and  unction,  can  make 
a  whited  sepulchre  big  enough  to  hide  a  murdered 
fact.  Stuff,  push,  cut  off,  mangle  and  twist  as  they 
will,  still  the  ghastly  finger  or  toe  protrudes,  and  the 
breath  of  Gehenna  is  there.  But  faugh  !  I  lose 
my  patience,  James.  Why  not  be  a  man  like  lago  ? 
Confess  yourself  thus  :  I've  got  conscience,  it  is  true, 
but  what  the  mischief  is  that  ?  I'll  pull  it  up  by  the 
roots,  and  toss  it  aside  like  a  weed,  if  it  botheis  me 
at  all.  Conscience  and  reason,  —  ha,  ha?  Soap-suds 
and  a  pipe  to  blow  bubbles  with,  —  rainbows  all! 
Who  am  I  that  I  should  call  myself  good  ?  Good 
ness  forsooth  !  'Tis  a  blister  on  the  heart  and  a 
beggar  with  a  perpetual  pleurisy.  Out  upon  thee, 
Conscience,  and  thy  religious  thimble-rigging.  If 
I'd  trust  thce,  thou  wouldst  turn  my  days  to  nails, 
and  drive  them  all  into  my  flesh.  No,  no  !  I'll  go 
in  for  the  fat  purse  and  the  sniggering  crowd,  and  it 
will  be  strange  if  I  cannot  make  as  good  a  show  as 
the  best." 


!68  RAINBOW  AND   REALITY. 

"  Malcolm,  you  are  crazed  !    What  do  you  mean  ? " 

"  Only  to  make  you  a  better  villain." 

"  What  blasphemy  !  " 

"  Well,  if  the  cap  don't  fit,  don't  wear  it.  I  never 
take  back  a  gift." 

"  You  appall  me  with  your  generosity.  But  prob 
ably,  if  your  thoughts  were  not  the  shadows  of  your 
own  villainy,  you  would  be  less  extravagant.  Why, 
you  actually  pray  for  the  restoration  of  the  dead 
Satan." 

"  Certainly,"  replied  Lawson.  But  do  justice  to 
my  Egotism.  If  I  aspire  to  be  godly,  I  must,  like 
the  Deity,  have  a  Devil  to  match.  The  sun  must 
have  darkness  to  shine  on,  else  sunlight  were  not." 

"  Well,  you  beat  me.  It  never  occurred  to  me 
that  God  must  find  a  match  in  his  own  Lucifer  to 
set  off  his  Divinity  to  advantage.  What  a  pity  that 
you  are  not  a  defender  of  the  Faith ! " 

"  Indeed,  I  am,  but  you  are  not.  But  excuse  me 
now." 

"  One  moment  more,  Malcolm.  There  is  some 
thing  in  you,  after  all,  and  I  would  like  to  get  at  it. 
You  never  have  the  blues  like  me.  How  is  that  ? " 

"That's  my  secret." 

"  Your  secret !     Pray  reveal  it." 

"  What  !  a  Christian  ask  a  heathen  for  a  revela 
tion  ?  Preposterous  ! " 

"  But  it  is  no  joke,  Malcolm.  You  rouse  a  strange 
interest  in  me,  and,  heathen  or  Christian,  I  must 
have  your  secret." 

"  Supposing  you  know  it  already,  —  that  it  is,  in 
fact,  an  old  story,  —  what  then  ? " 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  169 

"  Never  mind.    Out  with  it,  and  cease  to  quibble." 
"  So  be  it :  do  you  see  that  skull  on  the  mantel  ? " 
"  This  ? "  and  James  examined  it  curiously. 
"  Yes.     That  piece  of  mortality  was  filled  with 
diamonds  once,  saved  from  a  wreck.    I  carried  them 
six  hundred  miles  on  foot.     My  comrades  lay  down 
and  died  one  after  another,  and  finally  I  and  two 
others  had  all  the  spoil.     Our  garments  turned  to 
rags,  and  there  was  no  casket  so  handy  as  the  skull. 
A  weird  sight,  I  tell  you,  friend,  to  see  those  dead 
sockets  dazzling  with  gems  in  the  tropic  sun  ! " 
"  How  came  you  to  lose  your  share  ? " 
"  It  was  stolen,  whilst  I  slept,  and  gambled  away." 
"  But  what  has  this  to  do  with  your  secret  ? " 
"  Much  ;  for,  being  a  fact,  it  is  a  parable  of  God, 
and  therefore  a  revelation.     See  those  marble  halls, 
those  golden  spires,  those  bridges  there,  and  beyond 
that  purple  stream,  the  city  on  the  hill,  blushing  at 
the  kiss  of  sunset,  —  are  these  not  gems  given  us  by 
our  faithful  dead  and  dying  ?  We  have  each  a  death's 
head  such  as  that  was,  full  of  value  and  beauty;  but, 
careless  of  our  boundless  wealth,  we  sleep  in  a  dan 
gerous  place,  and,  behold  !  our  patrimony  is  gone." 
"  Strange  talk  for  an  infidel  !  " 
"  The  foolish  virgins  had  no  oil  in  their  lamps 
when  the  bridegroom  came." 

"  Stranger  still.  My  skull  is  numb,  but  hang  the 
lantern-jaws,"  said  the  hypocrite,  taking  refuge  in 
wit. 

"  O  James,  familiarity  breeds  contempt,  and  you 
have  been  an  age  too  long  in  a  divinity  school.  Why 
not  use  your  own  talents  ?  A  clean  breast  is  my  se- 


i;0  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

cret,  and  that  of  all  who  live  in  reality,  and  not  in  the 
shadow  of  another's  name,  or  in  the  echo  of  another's 
thought,  or  in  the  phantom  glory  of  by-gone  faith. 
Do  you  worship  Christ  truly  ?  If  so,  you  are  not 
only  a  Christian  but  a  Christ,  and  if  he  is  God,  so 
are  you.  And  this  is  the  secret  of  the  world  as  it 
is  revealed  to  me.  Squander  not  your  treasure,  but 
keep  an  honest  lookout.  Eternal  vigilance  is  the 
price  of  safe  travel  through  this  earthly  waste." 

"  What,  another  sermon  !  Sold  again,  and  the 
money  paid.  What  an  infidel  !  We've  both  got 
skull  on  the  brain.  That's  a  dead  certainty,  but  you 
call  it  a  living.  And  as  for  diamonds,  why,  the  gems 
of  my  intellect  shine  best  in  the  light  of  the  church. 
But  that  may  be  due  to  the  blackness  of  the  cloth." 

"  Ghastly  mourning,  James." 

"  Glad  to  hear  it.  Diamonds  look  best  on  dark 
dresses.  But  what's  the  good  of  them  unless  you 
can  dispose  of  them,  or  get  them  admired  as  yours? 
Mine  go  to  the  highest  bidder.  I've  two  calls,  — 
one  to  Old  Notion  and  another  to  Modern  Stake : 
and  I  think  I'll  go  to  the  former ;  for  the  latter,  if 
not  red,  is  too  rare  to  suit  me.  But  I've  rich  rela 
tions  at  both.  By  the  way,  some  new  books,  I  see," 
and  he  stopped  to  look  at  them.  " '  Life  of  the 
Christ,'  Brooklyn,  —  can't  get  along  without  that." 
And  he  rattled  on,  mimicking  a  showman  who  stirs 
up  his  lions  with  a  long  pole  ;  "  and,  bless  me  !  fif 
teen  versions  of  the  miracles,  and  Dr.  Cumming's 
exegesis  of  the  Four  Beasts  and  the  tenth  horn  of 
the  Great  Dragon,  with  an  essay  on  pastoral  duty 
annexed  !  And,  ladies  and  gentlemen,  behold  Pusey- 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  iji 

ism  and  Palmistry,  and  the  prophecies  of  a  red-hot 
radical,  cheek  by  jowl,  while  Archbishop  Manning 
bursts  with  papal  infallibility,  and  Conway  patron 
izes  Confucius.  Good  Lord  deliver  us  !  man  and 
monkey  reconciled  by  Jonathan  Snoozletalk,  or  all 
religion  placed  on  a  scientific  basis,  while  Channing 
smiles  over  the  'Report  of  the  Evangelical  Alliance.' 
And  just  perceive,  Freeman's  'Ladder  to  Theism' 
peeps  in  at  the  window,  and  makes  love  to  Jack 
son's  '  Wonders  of  the  Summerland,'  while  Fickle- 
wits'  '  Sympathy  of  all  Creeds '  turns  up  its  literary 
nose  at  Tom  Paine's  'Age  of  Reason.'  And  there 
is  '  High  Survey,'  as  amiable  as  Gulliver  at  Lilliput, 
shining  in  sweet  concord  with  Mr.  Vegetable  Light, 
while  his  old  friend  Teufelsdhrock  points  to  the  stars, 
and,  standing  on  his  coffin,  shakes  his  fist  at  Death- 
kingdoms  innumerable.  On  the  right  is  a  store  of 
'  Radical  Conundrums,'  and  on  the  left  is  Shakes 
peare,  like  the  Colossus  of  Rhodes,  a  fleet  of  hum 
ble  vessels  sailing  beneath.  And  what  have  we 
here  ?  '  Prometheus,'  by  Jove,  a  moralist  finding 
his  vulture  in  ladies'  eyes,  and  tortured  to  death  by 
force  of  satin  and  silk  ;  and  observe  that  witty  tran- 
scendentalist  in  the  middle,  baiting  a  steel-trap  for 
'American  Religion,'  while  Bradlaugh  and  Dilke 
worry  the  '  Church  and  State,'  like  cats  playing 
with  a  dead  rat  which  they  can't  eat.  And,  to 
crown  all,  Spurgeon  on  cigars,  Murray  on  the 
horse,  the  impeachment  of  Andrew  Johnson,  and 
the  trial  of  the  greatest  preacher  of  the  age  by  his 
own  peers  for  petty  larceny." 

And  James  selected  the  "  Life  of  the  Christ,"  and 


172 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


went  to  his  rich  relations  to  preach  a  creed  whose 
beauty  he  did  not  see,  and  whose  letter  he  despised. 
The  sophist  is  a  Frankenstein  :  let  him  have  a  care 
concerning  his  own  creation. 

"Proud  Satan,  dead,  and  gone  to  swift  decay, 
No  longer  stands  in  man's  triumphant  way ; 
But  Carnal  Meanness  sneaks  in  paltry  snakes 
To  make  unguarded  preachers  worse  than  rakes. 
Oh,  that  the  Fiend  who  kept  the  world  in  awe, 
Should  yield  to  Cant  and  his  base  nature's  law  ! 

"  '  The  woman  tempted  me,'  Old  Adam  said. 
But  what  saith  he,  who  Christian  soldiers  led, 
In  name  of  God  who  leaves  his  lofty  throne 
To  live,  for  sinners'  sake,  a  life-long  groan  ? 
When  called  by  Him  to  answer  for  his  sin, 
That  he  perforce  of  Cross  may  pardon  win. 
'  The  woman  tempted  me,'  the  saint  replies, 
And  Hell,  disgusted,  takes  to  flight  and  dies. 

"  '  Our  time  is  come  ! '  the  gasping  fiends  exclaim  ; 
'  What  fools  were  we  to  risk  infernal  fame, 
When  saints  themselves  disgrace  the  Christian  name. 
Oh,  that  the  mind  of  men  could  see  that  we 
But  Darkness  made,  that  Lovely  Light  might  be  ! 
No  hope  remains  that  this  disastrous  day 
Precursor  is  of  aught  but  filthy  prey. 
Therefore  we  imps  expire,  quite  useless  grown, 
And  leave  to  saints  imperial  Satan's  throne.'  " 

—  J.  Sweep. 


XIII. 

UNITY   IN    DIVERSITY. 

MALCOLM  was  left  alone,  and  as  he  sat  won 
dering  how  Jennie  would  receive  the  avowal 
of  his  real  sentiments,  his  eye  fell  upon  some  well- 
used  books  which  had  long  been  his  traveling  com 
panions.  His  heart  warmed  toward  them,  and  he 
recalled  the  happy  hours  he  had  spent  with  them 
while  at  sea,  despite  the  interruptions  of  duty.  And 
again  he  scaled  the  shrouds,  heedless  of  the  angry 
winds  which  leaped  from  their  furious  chariots  and 
threatened  to  lift  him  from  his  grasp,  until  at  length 
he  reached  the  royal  mast,  which  smote  the  sky  like  a 
sabre,  and  sprang  upon  the  creaking  yard  to  gather 
in  the  sail,  surveying  the  full  form  of  the  ship  as 
she  crashed,  a  host  in  herself,  through  the  gleaming 
masses  of  the  sea.  But  this  remembrance  soon  gave 
way  to  another,  until  finally  the  books  that  he  had 
loved  took  the  forms  of  their  authors,  and  they 
came  near  him,  as  if  he,  too,  belonged  to  their 
sacred  guild.  Yet,  scarce  had  this  vision  appeared 
when  it  faded  away,  banished,  no  doubt,  by  some 
inferior  thought  ;  and  as  it  fled  there  fled  with  it 
the  peace  of  the  moment. 

"  Who  am  I  ? "  cried  he.  "  What  dread  mystery 
is  this  in  which  I  live  and  die  with  the  moments 
that  'pass  ?  What  is  this  which  coils  itself  around 

(i73) 


174 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


my  soul  like  a  snake,  and  strangles  the  best  of  my 
thoughts  as  soon  as  they  are  born  ?  Alas !  I  am 
weak,  and  there  is  no  completeness  for  me.  I  am 
the  Wandering  Jew,  and  those  books  that  I  loved 
are  the  shades  of  the  dead  wives,  taunting  me  with 
infidelity  to  their  memory.  Oh,  how  I  loved  you, 
and  worshiped  the  very  words  which  fell  from  your 
lips !  Ah,  you  remember  how  I  picked  them  up  and 
enshrined  them  in  my  heart,  where  they  found  a 
significance  not  their  own  !  Verily,  it  is  very  hard 
to  have  sinned,  like  Ahasuerus.  But  she  remains," 
he  went  on,  answering  for  the  books,  "to  recom 
pense  you  for  the  loss  of  the  letter ;  for  is  she  not 
the  best  that  is  left  of  a  thousand  generations,  the 
living  spirit  of  the  Book  of  books  herself?" 

Here  that  same  old  serpent  who  tempted  him 
before  warned  him  not  to  steal  the  fire  of  Heaven. 
"  How  absurd,"  he  began,  "  to  waste  thy  youth 
amid  the  vague  subtleties  of  verbal  expression  ! 
What  in  the  name  of  all  that  is  pleasant  and 
easy  does  this  metaphysical  humdrum  amount  to  ? 
Who  art  thou  that  durst  aspire,  like  Lucifer  of  old, 
to  the  dignity  of  Godhood  ?  Canst  thou  not  see 
that,  far  from  being  even  respectable,  thou  shalt 
become  a  great  enemy  to  thy  generation  ?  And 
canst  thou  not  also  see,  as  I  have  shown  thee  be 
fore,  the  dismal  fate  which  I  foreshadow  ?  Behold 
thyself  on  the  grim  Caucasus  of  radical  isolation, 
chained  to  the  rock  of  devotion  to  a  vague  idea. 
For,  as  sure  as  God  is,  and  I  am  that  I  shall  forever 
be,  the  Strength  and  the  Force  of  the  Christian 
Zeus  shall  take  thee  in  their  horrid  arms,  and  rob 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


thy  senses  of  their  life.  Do  not  dream,  O  visionary 
man,  that  the  loss  of  the  woman  thou  lovest  shall 
be  the  sum  of  thy  misery.  That  were,  indeed,  but 
a  drop  in  the  river  of  thy  grief.  Prepare  for  a  long 
sojourn  in  the  wilderness  of  recovery  to  expiate  the 
sins  of  thy  early  youth.  Nor  is  this  all.  What 
canst  thou,  frail  one,  hope  to  do  in  this  word,  know 
ing  as  thou  dost  that  the  God  of  Nazareth,  with  all 
his  wisdom  and  will,  could  find  but  a  few  unfortu 
nate  women  and  men  to  accept  the  hope  and  the 
love  he  stole  from  the  house  of  Him  whom  his  very 
memory  deposed  ?  " 

"  Yet,  in  his  words,  blessed  are  they  who  are 
persecuted  for  righteousness'  sake,  for  theirs  is  the 
Kingdom  of  Heaven." 

"  No,  not  half  so  blessed  as  they  who  are  poor  in 
spirit  ;  for  doomed  are  they  who,  in  the  pride  and 
arrogance  of  their  hearts,  aspire  to  the  power  and 
the  glory  of  the  existing  Zeus.  Canst  thou  not 
foresee  the  darkness  gather,  and  forehear  the  whirr 
of  the  birds  as  they  come,  borne  on  the  breath  of 
his  wrath,  to  pierce  thy  bosom  with  their  beaks  ? 
Methinks  I  hear  thee  cry,  in  mock-heroic  strain, 
that  thou  poor  subject  art  great  as  he  the  object 
King  of  the  world.  But,  in  thy  macerated  heart, 
thou  shalt  feel  thyself  but  a  faint  echo  of  the  all- 
pervading  voice  which  sings  the  song  of  the  uni 
verse.  No,  no.  Fly,  I  pray  thee,  from  thy  wild 
and  most  fantastic  thought  ;  for  as  the  guileless 
bird,  being  found  among  the  filchers  of  the  seed, 
was  destroyed,  so  shalt  thou  be  punished,  —  yea, 
even  as  a  scarecrow  shalt  thou  be  nailed  up  on  the 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


cross  of  infamy,  even  as  was  he  who  mixed  his 
groans  and  his  blood  with  those  of  the  robber  and 
the  thief." 

"  Yet,  nevertheless,  blessed  are  they  who  are  per 
secuted  for  righteousness-  sake,  for  theirs  is  the 
Kingdom  of  Heaven." 

"Ay,  indeed.  But  in  this  glorious  period  of  honied 
optimism,  social  repose,  defalcation,  and  kid  gloves, 
thou  shalt  not  even  have  the  consolation  of  perse 
cution.  For  the  world  has  learned  that  that  is  as 
the  razor  to  the  beard,  —  the  oftener  it  is  shorn  the 
stronger  shall  it  grow.  Thus  blank  indifference, 
indiscriminate  pity,  abject  neglect,  shall  beset  thee 
in  thy  house,  and  spill  on  the  ground  the  cup  of  thy 
philanthropy  ere  it  can  reach  the  lips  of  those  who 
bear  the  burdens  of  the  world.  Ay,  doomed  and 
most  miserable  are  they  who  steal  the  Father's  fire 
in  dark  oblivion  of  the  Son's,  and  give  it  unto  the 
cold  and  needy.  Slander  shall  stab  them  in  the 
dark ;  Contumely  shall  crush  them  in  the  light ;  De 
spair  shall  blacken  the  hours  that  pass  ;  and  blind 
men  shall  stand  upon  their  eyes.  Yet,  still  shall 
they  live,  for  their  vain  and  fruitless  impulse  of  love 
shall  grow  again  as  soon  as  devoured  by  the  eagles 
of  God.  And  after  ten  thousand  years,  ages,  days, 
—  for  here  time  and  space  are  not,  —  shall  come 
the  final  effort  of  Fate,  when  the  stars  shall  be  torn 
from  their  sockets,  and  flung  like  black  hail  into  the 
fire  of  the  universe,  where  shall  be  weeping  and 
wailing  and  gnashing  of  teeth." 

"  But  is  it  not  enough,  —  even  if  the  orbless  night 
vanish  in  a  sea  of  flame,  and  with  it  everything  that 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


177 


sense  holds  dear, —  that  I  will  still  live?  Avaunt, 
then,  Satan,  for  God,  object  King  and  almighty 
though  he  is,  must  retain  the  thought  of  his  own 
subject,  and  that  am  I !  I  am  for  the  moment  or 
the  age  or  the  ten  thousand  ages  which  I  call  mine, 
and  I  will  do  as  I  deem  most  fit.  Thus  it  is  my  will 
to  sneer  at  thee,  O  Force,  and  at  thee,  too,  False  Senti 
ment  of  the  times  who  wouldst  string  the  millstone 
of  base  desire  round  my  neck  and  fling  me  into  the 
sea  of  Phantom  Convenience.  Take,  O  Zeus,  take 
O  World,  that  which  is  yours  !  But  I  will  keep  my 
self  to  myself,  safe  and  whole,  even  if  you  should 
fling  me  into  the  hell  of  your  offended  dignity. 

0  ye  gods  !  ye  cannot  rob  me  of  my  will,  that  is 
mine  forever  and  ever ;  and  if  it  is  within  my  power 

1  will  dethrone  you  from  your  kingdoms  of  Eter 
nal  Indolence  and  Revenge, —  mark  you,  I  will  do  it. 
And  it  will  be  a  joyful  sight  to  see  you  tumbling, 
headlong,  headlong,  from  On  High  ;  for,  behold,  the 
Sun  of  Righteousness  will  shine  with  a  new  glory 
and  cast  a  smile  upon  the  whole  shower  of  you,  so 
that  Iris  alone  shall  be  left  to  take  you  in  her  arms 
and  give  you  for  a  shroud  the  brightest  colors  of  the 
sky." 

12 


XIV. 
EXCOMMUNICATION. 

DRS.  Buzz,  Bungle,  Lullaby,  Tightcreed,  and 
other  members  of  the  C.  M.  P.  A.,  concluded 
that  it  was  not  sufficient  to  fight  the  good  fight  in 
the  great  Hippodrome,  but  that  that  they  ought  to 
secure  the  Latitudinarian  Hall,  in  Upper-class  Con 
version  Street,  in  order  to  eradicate  any  doubt  which, 
notwithstanding  the  previous  victories  of  the  Faith, 
might  linger  in  the  minds  of  the  community  con 
cerning  the  infallible  means  of  redemption  at  their 
disposal.  So  the  said  hall  was  hired,  and  opened  to 
the  public  by  Dr.  Bungle,  the  orator-in-chief  of  the 
grand  occasion,  who,  as  usual,  did  himself  full  jus 
tice  as  a  Knight  of  the  Rainbow  Creed  and  moder 
ator  of  this  convention.  His  text  was,  "  God  is 
love,"  —  a  subject  in  which  he  particularly  excelled, 
and  certainly  the  Almighty  must  have  been  highly 
gratified  by  the  glowing  tributes  paid,  not  only  to 
himself  personally,  but  to  his  marvelous  works.  The 
auditory,  as  usual,  testified  its  appreciation  of  his 
powers  by  loud  and  reiterated  applause,  and  there 
was  no  end  to  the  satisfaction  of  those  who  had 
afforded  this  praiseworthy  entertainment. 

But  since  it  were  needless  for  us  to  dwell  on  so 
common  an  occasion  as  the  display  of  the  Rainbow 
Creed,  the  peacock  of  the  heavens,  we  will  with- 

(178) 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


1/9 


draw  our  vision  from  that  splendid  phenomenon 
without  venturing  to  describe  its  wonderful  hues. 
For  Progressive  and  his  friends,  what  with  con 
tinual  intimacy  with  the  Deity,  and  being  admit 
ted  to  all  the  secrets  of  Revelation,  have  reached 
a  certain  pitch  of  perfection  in  the  description  of 
Divine  things  which  seems  quite  unattainable  by 
such  inferior  beings  as  poor  authors,  who  reside  in 
that  blackness  farthest  from  their  magnificent  Creed. 
Certainly,  we  must  confess  that,  in  view  of  the  brill 
iancy  of  Progressive  and  his  friends,  we  can  well 
realize  how  the  Children  of  Israel  felt  when  sur 
prised  by  Moses,  with  face  on  fire  with  the  reflected 
glory  of  God,  in  the  act  of  worshiping  a  golden  calf. 
So  dazzling  the  vision,  with  difficulty  we  keep  our 
countenance.  But  which  of  the  two,  the  reader 
anxiously  inquires,  is  Moses,  —  Dr.  P.  Bungle,  or 
the  author  himself  ?  For  the  Children  of  Israel, 
thus  illuminated  with  a  golden  calf  for  a  sun,  no 
doubt  formed  a  semi-circle  around  it  not  unlike  a 
rainbow,  and,  according  to  this,  Dr.  Bungle,  seeing 
that  his  Creed  subsists  wholly  by  the  acceptance  of 
the  money  of  the  people,  must  be  Aaron  himself, 
whereas  the  author,  who  cannot  get  anything  for  his 
work,  or  anybody  to  believe  it,  is  more  apt  to  resem 
ble  the  great  prophet  in  the  act  of  holding  up  the 
"Ten  Commandments."  But,  in  any  case,  the  Rain 
bow  Creed  is  a  hard  thing  to  describe  without  spe 
cial  assistance  from  On  High,  so  we  must  even  run 
the  risk  of  being  taken  for  idolaters  capering  around 
a  graven  image,  and  let  it  go  at  that. 

Malcolm,  who  had  attended  every  meeting,  and 


!8o  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

carefully  listened  to  all  that  was  said,  deplored  in  an 
elaborate  epistle  addressed  to  the  Faculty  his  ina 
bility  to  make  their  views  of  religion  harmonize 
with  his.  We  merely  give  from  memory,  as  we  had 
not  the  good  fortune  to  receive  the  production,  the 
gist  of  the  same.  He  declared,  firstly,  that  he  was 
principally  occupied  by  the  stupendous  miracle  of 
his  own  being,  and  that  in  such  wise  that  he  had  no 
reason  for  or  need  of  any  other  to  support  or  help 
his  belief  in  God  ;  and  he  wondered  why  his  teach 
ers  gave  themselves  so  much  concern  about  the 
miracles  of  the  Jews.  Secondly,  he  so  respected 
the  inscrutable  mystery  of  Life,  not  to  mention 
religion  at  all,  that  he  did  not  think  it  a  fit  subject 
for  mechanical  utterance  and  immature,  hap-hazard 
oratory.  Thirdly,  his  study  and  research,  limited  as 
they  were,  were  yet  sufficient  to  inform  him  that  all 
religions,  in  so  far  as  they  merited  the  name  "reli 
gion,"  were  one  in  spirit  and  purpose,  but  only  inad 
equately  appreciated  and  preached  by  their  individ 
ual  supporters ;  and  that,  considering  his  recognition 
of  this  simple  Truth,  he  did  not  think  it  worth  his 
while  to  favor  any  one  sect,  for  he  could  not  do  it 
save  to  the  prejudice  of  another.  "Moreover,"  he 
added,  "  I  cannot  believe  in  any  sect,  section,  or  slice 
of  the  whole  Truth,  and  pertain  to  it  exclusively 
after  the  manner  of  denominationalists,  without 
thereby  doing  simple  religion  an  injury.  I  think 
it  a  sin  to  be  partial :  to  be  impartial  is  to  be  just 
and  holy."  And  shortly  after  this,  in  a  fourth  state 
ment,  he  declared  that  he  saw  no  reason  why  Jesus 
should  be  called  God,  save  in  so  far  as  he,  being  a 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  181 

good  man  who  did  the  best  he  could  for  his  kind, 
was  entitled  to  their  recognition  and  respect.  "  In 
which  case,"  he  went  on,  "  I  cannot  in  common  logic 
separate  the  genuine  man  from  the  genuine  God. 
Both  are  one  in  the  same  holy  Spirit  of  Reform  in 
which  Jesus  intimated  that  he  lived  and  loved,  pray 
ing  that  all  others  might  share  the  same  unity." 
Fifthly,  he  told  his  teachers  that  his  conviction  of 
immortality  came  to  him  through  his  own  experi 
ence,  and  not  through  the  tradition  of  the  phenome 
nal  death,  resurection,  and  dematerialization  of  Jesus. 

The  assembled  representatives  of  the  Christian 
God,  it  is  needless  to  say,  were  not  particularly 
gratified  by  this  unexpected  ebullition  of  their 
young  Lucifer. 

'"Stupendous  miracle'  of  his  being!"  exclaimed 
Tightcreed.  "  Who  the  Devil  is  he  ?  Excuse  me, 
gentlemen,  but  positively  the  blasphemy  of  the  ras 
cal  is  beyond  all  precedent." 

"  I  do  not  blame  you  at  all,"  said  Bungle,  smil 
ing;  for  he  enjoyed,  as  he  said,  a  slant  at  the  the 
ologians.  "  It  is  far  beyond  the  president's.  But 
there  is  some  truth  in  what  he  says,  after  all." 

"  Just  enough,"  said  Lullaby,  "  to  make  it  pass 
with  the  few  turbulent  spirits  which  hang  on  the 
outskirts  of  the  Lord's  army,  as  eager  to  help  the 
enemy  as  the  friend,  according  to  the  whim  of  the 
moment.  It  is  not  in  the  nature  of  things  that  the 
vague  ideology  which  this  young  man  represents 
can  ever  be  popular  or  effective.  I  must  say  I  pre 
fer  the  clumsy  yet  logical  exactitude  of  the  declared 
enemy  of  the  Church.  However,  this  vehement 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


youth  will  soon  change  his  fancies  for  the  stable 
articles  of  the  Faith.  Our  most  successful  cler 
gymen  had  to  struggle  through  various  phases  of 
Infidelity  in  order  to  gain  their  present  renown." 

"  You  do  not  refer  to  the  thirty-nine,  I  hope,"  said 
Bungle,  enjoying  the  situation. 

"  No,"  replied  Lullaby,  "  we  cannot  expect  the  tal 
ented  youth  of  our  time  to  run  in  the  old  grooves  of 
Christian  ordinance.  Yet  it  is  not  too  much  to  ex 
pect  that  they  will  show  some  moderation  for  their 
own  sake,  and  a  little  respect  for  their  superiors." 

"  But,  Lullaby,  you  see,"  said  Bungle,  "  the  sub 
jective  radical  impulse  is  very  strong,  and,  so  far  as 
I  can  see,  if  Christ  is  the  Ideal  Person  whom  we 
are  all  to  recognize,  we,  in  spite  of  various  traditions, 
must  stand  to  a  great  extent  upon  a  subjective  phi 
losophy.  Now,  then,  if  Christianity  is  the  real  spirit 
of  love,  and  not  a  mere  name  covering  a  special  the 
ology,  upon  what  else  can  we  base  our  action  ?  " 

"  I  do  not  like,"  said  Tightcreed,  with  a  look  of 
fire,  "  that  way  of  looking  at  things.  If  the  isolated 
fact  of  the  individual  Jesus'  atoning  sacrifice  falls, 
where  are  we  ?  I  must  say  it  is  not  in  accordance 
with  my  sympathy  with  the  fallen  state  of  human 
ity,  nor  in  keeping  with  my  career  as  a  minister  of 
the  Gospel,  to  tolerate  any  innovation  of  the  kind 
suggested.  So  I  beg  of  you,  gentlemen,  if  ye  be 
worthy  servants  of  the  Lord,  to  close  this  matter  at 
once  by  expelling  this  unfortunate  man  from  the 
institution.  As  soon  as  I  saw  him,  I  felt  that  he 
was  in  no  way  fitted  to  do  service  in  the  Vineyard. 
This  is  the  dictate  of  my  own  good  sense,  which  is 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


altogether  unbiased  by  any  of  your  new-fangled  ob 
jective  and  subjective  speculations,  which  whimsical 
attempts  to  penetrate  the  mysteries  have  nothing  at 
all  to  do  with  our  profession  as  I  understand  it." 

"  But,  friend  Tightcreed,"  said  Bungle,  "  consider 
the  tendency  of  the  age.  I  see  little  harm  in  the 
lad.  He  is  only  carried  away  by  a  sudden  percep 
tion  of  a  great  truth,  which  for  the  sake  of  oppor 
tunity  he  will  have  to  tone  down  somewhat.  Very 
few  young  men,  I  observe,  remain  long  on  the  vis 
ionary  stage  upon  which  a  generous,  though  mis 
taken  impulse  brings  them  to  act.  The  common 
sense  of  the  world  is  too  strong  to  admit  of  long 
continuance  amid  the  mists  of  juvenile  enthusiasm. 
I  think,  as  I  said  before,  that  you  had  better  give 
way  a  little,  Brother  Tightcreed,  and  let  him  stay." 

"  I  dare  not,"  said  Tightcreed,  in  a  rage  ;  "  his 
conduct  is  too  exasperating,  too  provocative  of  re 
bellion  among  his  classmates.  I  am  sorry,  very 
sorry,  but  go  he  must." 

Dr.  Bungle  sighed,  for  he  had  a  good  heart  ;  yet 
he  could  not  do  as  he  pleased  in  his  present  uncom 
fortable  position.  He  feared  that  Christ,  the  sun  of 
his  righteousness,  might  go  out  and  leave  him,  poor 
raindrop,  without  a  vestige  of  color. 

"  Gentlemen,"  said  he,  "  I  protest,  in  Christ's 
name  I  protest,  against  the  tyranny  which  would 
deprive  the  institution  of  a  noble-minded  youth 
whose  satire  is  only  the  result  of  a  deep  feeling  of 
the  inadequacy  of  any  single  intellectual  statement 
to  contain  the  stupendous  mystery  of  God.  Leave 
him  yet  awhile  to  himself,  and  no  doubt  the  ripen 


£84  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

ing  of  his  intellect,  and  the  prudence  which  cometh 
with  years,  will  make  him  one  of  our  most  esteemed 
brethren  in  the  Faith." 

"  I  have  spoken  once  and  forever  in  regard  to 
this  matter,"  said  the  terrible  Tightcreed. 

"  But  hear  me,  Brother  Tightcreed,"  said  Lullaby, 
energetically;  "while  I  agree  with  you  in  thus  repro 
bating  the  strange  conduct  of  this  youth,  consider 
ing  it  as  you  do,  a  rank  instance  of  disloyalty  to 
Christ,  I  think,  with  Brother  Bungle,  it  might  be 
more  prudent  to  pass  over  this  essay  as  a  burst  of 
boyish  petulance.  It  really  is  not  worth  our  while, 
as  I  have  frequently  urged,  to  fret  ourselves  about 
the  puerilities  of  the  period.  Christianity,  beyond 
all  doubt,  has  too  strong  a  hold  on  the  affections  of 
the  people  to  be  affected  in  the  least  by  the  frantic 
attempts  of  Infidelity  to  cast  it  off.  But,  brethren, 
do  as  you  please ;  far  be  it  from  me  to  interfere  with 
your  consciences.  By  the  way,  here  comes  Brother 
Buzz.  Let  us  have  a  word  from  him." 

That  dignitary  being  shown  the  manifesto,  de 
clared  at  once  his  opinion  of  the  matter. 

"  Gentlemen,"  he  began,  with  a  profound  sigh, 
"here  we  have  the  most  melancholy  instance  of 
heresy  which  has  ever  darkened  our  Church.  The 
whole  character  of  our  religion  is  most  slanderously 
defamed  or  perverted  in  such  a  way  as  to  make 
angels  weep.  Do  not  hesitate  to  make  an  example 
of  this  headstrong  and  most  unruly  youth,  who,  not 
withstanding  our  past  indulgence  and  the  kindness 
of  Brother  Crisp,  thus  repudiates  the  faith  which 
giveth  eternal  life.  Let  us  rise  at  once  in  the  firm 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


warmth  of  our  righteous  indignation  and  dismiss 
him  from  our  Church,  where  I  am  afraid  he  has 
sown  the  seed  of  the  worst  Infidelity." 

"  But,  dear  Buzz,"  said  Bungle,  "  don't  you  exag 
gerate  a  little  ?  Read  again  his  hasty,  yet  not 
wholly  impertinent  remarks.  There  is  far  more  to 
him  than  you  think.  There  is  an  intuitive  logic  in 
them  that  demands  some  forethought." 

"  What  is  the  use  of  reasoning,"  replied  Buzz, 
"  when  a  man  openly  and  resolutely  denies  all  faith 
in  the  special  lordship  of  Jesus,  in  the  miracles  and 
atonement,  as  taught  from  time  immemorial  ?  For 
my  part,  the  less  we  say,  and  the  sooner  we  get  rid 
of  him,  the  better  for  us  and  the  people  whom  we 
serve.  In  some  respects,  I  confess,  I  rather  like  the 
young  man.  He  says  a  good  thing  once  in  a  while, 
but  this  dreamy  skepticism  of  his,  this  indecent, 
slap-dash  and  random  vagueness  of  character,  is 
altogether  incompatible  with  the  discretion  and 
gravity  demanded  by  the  denominational  interests, 
which,  to  tell  the  truth,  are  rather  low  just  now  ; 
but,  no  doubt,  the  most  resolute  preaching  of  Christ 
will  bring  them  up  again." 

"  Yet  we  must  be  more  of  Christs  ourselves,  if  I 
may  say  so,"  said  Bungle.  "  I  am  tired  of  prayer- 
meetings.  Is  there  no  other  means  of  redemption?" 

"  I  see  nothing  before  us,"  replied  the  persistent 
Buzz,  "  but  to  remain  consistent  with  ourselves,  as 
Christian  ministers,  and  faithful  to  the  denomina 
tional  interests.  God  has  hardened  the  heart  of 
modern  Infidelity.  We  can  no  other  than  use  our 
power  in  behalf  of  His  people.  Let  us,  then,  stretch 


i86  RAINBOW  AND   REALITY. 

forth  the  rod  of  '  the  Word.'  The  plague  must  fall 
on  the  obdurate  Egyptian." 

"  But  be  sure  your  plague  falls  on  the  right  per 
son,"  said  Bungle.  "  There  are  many  kinds  of  Infi 
delity  nowadays." 

"  How  can  we,  gentlemen,"  returned  Buzz,  "  with 
Christ  for  our  guide,  err  in  this  matter  ?  Respect 
for  his  name,  and  regard  for  the  peace  of  society, 
compel  us  to  banish  this  man  from  our  communion." 

"I  suppose,  then,"  said  Bungle,  languidly,  "you 
must  have  your  way.  But  I  scarcely  like  to  part 
with  him.  He  is  better  than  you  think." 

"  I  will  take  the  responsibility,"  cried  Tightcreed. 

"  And  I  too,"  said  the  eager  Buzz  ;  "  the  repose 
of  society  must  be  guaranteed." 

"  And  you  may  be  right  after  all,"  concluded  Lul 
laby.  "  The  egotism  of  Lawson  is  positively  alarm 
ing.  What  a  pity  that  our  faithful  friend  Crisp 
should  have  been  so  deceived  in  him !  Pluffie  ought 
to  have  used  his  influence  to  better  advantage.  Not, 
however,  that  I  think  Lawson  a  bad  young  man  ; 
but  this  unfortunate  streak,  this  unfortunate  streak, 
this  atrocious  levity  and  ape-like  malevolence,  prop 
erly  termed  satire,  which  vitiates  his  entire  being ! 
Alas  !  Mr.  Carlyle  has  much  to  answer  for  ;  and 
those  men  of  Concord,  when,  oh,  when  shall  a  limit 
be  put  to  their  influence?  Even  the  most  beautiful 
spirits  are  tainted  by  their  fatal  example." 

"I  hope,"  returned  Buzz,  "you  do  not  blame  my 
illustrious  friend,  Mr.  High  Survey,  for  the  delin 
quencies  of  the  period.  He  has  outlived  his  radi 
calism,  and  now  sees  the  propriety  of  becoming 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


a  declared  advocate  of  prayer,  as  becometh  the 
recipient  of  the  highest  honors  of  literature." 

"  Of  course  not,"  cried  Lullaby.  "  But  I  doubt 
whether  the  beautiful  picture  of  dignity  and  repose 
he  now  exhibits  will  fully  atone  for  the  Infidelity  of 
his  earlier  years.  But,  not  to  mention  him,  we  have 
much  to  be  thankful  for.  Let  us  unite  in  prayer." 

After  this  a  letter  of  excommunication  was  writ 
ten  and  sent  to  Malcolm. 

So  much  for  P.  Bungle  as  raindrop.  Let  us  end 
with  a  word  about  him  as  rainbow  in  full.  This 
was  essentially  a  man  of  his.  times,  a  sort  of  theo 
logical  Disraeli,  who,  with  the  most  finished  jug 
glery  of  tongue,  could  conciliate  all  sides  of  the 
Church  with  a  breath,  and  compel  them  to  echo 
his  praises  as  the  greatest  light  of  the  age,  the  most 
brilliant  specimen  of  humility  extant.  He  was  the 
leader-in-chief  and  grand  master  of  the  great  Inde 
pendent  Spirit  Navigation  Denomination,  being  the 
admiral  of  six"  squadrons  of  humble  vessels.  He 
was  a  Calvinist,  a  Unitarian,  a  Liberal  Christian,  a 
Universalist,  a  Republican,  and  a  Phrenologist.  Nor 
did  he  neglect  agriculture  and  the  fine  arts.  There 
is  no  word  in  the  dictionary  or  elsewhere  more  ade 
quate  to  express  his  theological  merit  than  "  Rain 
bow."  We  can  see  him  now,  overarching  the  world 
from  Dan  to  Beersheba,  an  object  of  admiration 
to  the  children  of  all  schools,  who,  as  soon  as  he 
appears  upon  the  horizon,  rush  to  see  him  spread 
himself.  He  was  all  things  to  all  men,  and  more 
especially  to  the  women,  who,  as  we  have  already 
said,  are  more  sensitive  to  the  operation  of  the 


1 88  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

Spirit  than  men ;  and  he  was  just  as  good  and  as 
great  a  man  as  you  could  expect  a  Christian  in  his 
position  to  be,  —  a  splendid  character  spoiled  by  one 
or  two  lasting  lies,  a  koh-i-noor  diamond  with  a  flaw. 

We  actually  believe — such  was  the  astounding 
liberality  of  this  knight  —  that  if  it  had  been  he, 
instead  of  Luther,  who  inaugurated  the  Reforma 
tion,  there  never  would  have  been  any  marked  dif 
ference  between  Protestants  and  Roman  Catholics. 
He  would  have  argued  with  the  Pope  in  this  wise : 
"  Now,  my  dear  father  Leo,  you  must  know  that  I 
have  your  interest  at  heart.  You  cannot  but  see 
the  radical  tendencies  of  the  times  and  the  necessity 
of  being  a  little  less  strict  in  your  views.  Give  way 
a  little.  Men  are  necessarily  different  from  one  an 
other.  One  likes  fish  and  another  likes  flesh.  Just 
look  at  their  heads :  here  is  a  bullet,  there  is  a 
pumpkin.  You  must  adapt  yourself  to  circum 
stances  and  give  up  this  absolution  business.  It 
will  be  the  death  of  you." 

What  do  you  think  Leo  would  have  said  to  this 
harangue  ? 

We  think  we  hear  him.  say,  "  Come  to  my  arms, 
my  dear  Progressive,  you  are  a  man  after  my  own 
heart.  Just  take  this  cardinal's  hat,  and  forget  the 
Absolution  for  a  day  or  two.  We  will  attend  to  it  as 
soon  as  we  can  get  time.  Don't  fuss  about  it.  What 
ever  is,  is  right.  As  you  yourself  say,  some  need 
flesh  and  others  need  fish.  You  cannot  treat  an  ass 
like  a  sheep.  I  happen  to  be  awfully  hard  up  just 
now,  and  must  keep  up  appearances.  What  would 
all  the  grannies  say,  if  I  took  away  this  blessed 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  189 

means  of  redemption  ? "  Here  old  Leo  would  wink 
jesuitically,  and  the  Rev.  P.  Bungle  would  walk  off 
with  the  cardinal's  hat,  and  not  know  whether  to 
wink  or  not. 

Mr.  Mob  is  the  Pope  of  the  present  day,  and  well 
rewards  all  that  will  pander  to  his  variable  theologi 
cal  and  psychological  fancies.  These  cards  are  so 
handy,  and  the  magic  table  is  so  exquisitely  con 
structed.  Words  do  so  easily  turn  themselves  into 
bread,  and  illustrations  are  splendid  bridges  for  diffi 
cult  places  !  But  Mr.  Mob  grumbles  and  asks,  "What 
am  I  to  do  if  there  be  no  one  to  tell  me  about 
the  immortality  of  my  individual  consciousness  ?  I 
cannot  get  along  without  a  hint  or  two  on  that  sub 
ject."  And  we  reply,  "  Mr.  Mob,  do  you  know  what 
became  of  the  boarder  that  did  not  pay  his  board- 
bill  ? "  Mr.  Mob  grins ;  for  he  thinks  we  are 
making  fun  of  him.  But  when  we  tell  him  that 
Eternal  Law,  not  to  say  the  Eternal  Person,  has  a 
knack  of  numbering  such  defaulters  among  the 
goats  who  do  not  obtain  a  seat  at  the  divine  table, 
he  looks  angry,  and  throws  an  ominous  glance  on 
the  mud  in  which  he  stands,  while  we,  remembering 
Prometheus  and  the  Cross,  know  enough  to  hold  our 
tongue. 

We  humbly  resign  to  Drs.  Lullaby,  Buzz,  Bungle, 
and  Pluffle  the  privilege  of  telling  him  about  the 
angel  throng  on  high  :  we  have  enough  to  do  to 
draw  attention  to  the  angel  throng  of  Virtues  here 
below.  Those  ten  commandments  must  be  resusci 
tated.  Who  will  join  the  league  that  Mr.  Shaft  pro 
posed  to  that  laudable  end  ? 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

How  absurd  to  base  the  Eternal  Verities  on  the 
wonderful  doings  of  those  who  lived  thousands  of 
years  agoJ  The  dream  about  the  image  that  Dan 
iel  told  to  Nebuchadnezzar  is  applicable  to  the  em 
pire  of  Christianity.  Verily  there  is  much  clay  inter 
mixed  with'the  iron  of  its  feet,  and  fall  it  surely  shall, 
unless  steps  are  immediately  taken  to  remove  the 
crumbling  earth,  and  supply  a  stronger  material. 
Half-way  measures  are  bungling.  The  clay  must  be 
taken  away,  and  carefully,  too,  lest  the  image  topple 
suddenly  over  on  our  heads. 

But  there  is  some  weird  influence  at  work,  akin 
to  the  magic  of  the  ring  of  Charlemagne's  mistress, 
that  keeps  us  from  seeing  the  havoc  of  decay.  For 
with  greater  zeal  than  ever  we  find  people  devoting 
themselves  to  priest,  confessional,  surplice  and  can 
dlestick,  as  if  the  sun  of  Knowledge  had  ceased 
to  shine  upon  them.  What  does  it  all  mean  ? 
There  must  be  some  fearfully  anaconda  or  scor 
pion-like  unfaithfulness  to  the  Good  in  the  nursery 
of  the  Lord,  so  that  those  who  enter  there  become 
fascinated,  and  then,  being  well  anointed  by  the 
oil  of  its  tongue,  are  devoured  whole,  or  stung 
to  death.  Priests  are  often  lionized  ;  may  they  not 
also  become  like  the  Serpent  they  rail  against?  But 
such  things  dwell  not  in  places  of  light  and  repose, 
being  the  natives  of  the  black  pitch-pools  which 
Dore  paints  so  powerfully.  And  where  does  that 
darkness  end  ?  As  there  is  no  beginning,  so  is 
there  no  end  to  it.  There  are  spots  upon  the  sun, 
and,  as  the  poet  says,  "  there  is  a  crack  in  every 
thing  God  makes."  This  is  the  crack  the  darkness 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  IQ1 

streams  through  and  brings  with  it  the  horrible 
things  Dante  saw  in  the  flight  of  imagination  which 
carried  him  into  the  realms  below.  The  coin 
cidences  between  the  conceptions  in  John's  revela 
tions,  in  Swedenborg's,  and  in  Dante's  are  worthy 
of  note.  How  natural  that  the  lustful  and  the  vile 
should  assume  the  forms  of  death's  heads,  hairy 
spiders,  and  slimy  griffins  to  the  eyes  of  the  pure ; 
and  yet  we  can  lay  down  our  pens  and  go  and  sin 
again,  and  laugh  as  if  nothing  had  happened. 

The  Rainbow  Knights  make  a  terrible  leap  on 
the  steeds  of  their  eloquence  when  they  spring 
across  the  chasm  that  separates  the  old  school  from 
the  new.  Happy  tact !  what  ease  of  transition 
from  degrading  superstition  to  half-incubated  phi 
losophy  !  But  the  chasm,  owing  to  the  logic  of 
events,  is  growing  daily  wider  and  wider  and  more 
difficult  to  be  leaped.  The  knights  carefully  avoid 
emphasizing  the  "  mystic  efficacy  of  the  blood," 
which  is  the  peculiar  characteristic  of  Christianity 
as  opposed  to  rational  deism.  For  that  would  be  to 
stumble  in  the  leap  and  spoil  the  effect  of  the 
show  ;  or,  not  to  lose  Scriptural  phrase,  that  were 
to  sew  the  patch  on  trie  old  garment  wrong  side 
out,  and  exhibit  too  plainly  the  wear  and  tear  of 
the  old  bottles  into  which  they  pour  the  new  wine 
of  modern  thought.  "  But,"  as  James  Singleface 
forcibly  remarked  to  Malcolm,  "  what  is  the  use  of 
telling  people  what  they  do  not  want  to  hear.  When 
I  preach  to  radical  societies,  I  alter  the  word  'Christ' 
into  'Goodness,'  and  when  I  preach  to  conservative, 
I  slip  in  '  Christ'  again,  and  all  parties  are  pleased." 


1 92  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

"  James,"  asked  Malcolm  in  reply,  "  did  you  ever 
read  the  story  of  the  old  man,  the  boy,  and  the 
ass?" 

"  Yes  :  what  about  it  ?  " 

"  Don't  you  see  the  application  ? " 

"  No." 

"  Your  object  in  being  a  minister,  as  I  understand 
it,  is  to  bring  souls  to  Christ,  or  to  God,  which  is 
the  same  thing  to  you.  In  that  case  do  not  try  to 
please  everybody.  What  would  Jesus  have  been 
had  he  been  a  Sadducee  to  the  Sadducees,  a  Phari 
see  to  the  Pharisees,  and  so  on  ?  You  are  delegated 
primarily  to  bring  your  own  soul  to  eternal  life,  or 
vice  versa.  See  that  it  does  not  slip  through  your 
ringers  on  the  road.  There  is  only  One  to  be 
pleased." 

"  What  an  egotist  you  are,  Malcolm  ! " 

"  So  was  Jesus,  James." 

"  But  he  was  God." 

"  If  he  was,  what  are  you  and  I  ? " 

"  Ha,  ha,  ha  !  you're  ready  for  an  insane  asylum." 

"  What  is  God,  James  ? " 

"  Love." 

"  Are  you  hate  ? " 

"  I  can't  say  that  I  am,  Malcolm." 

"Did  you  never  hear  that  love  was  life ? " 

"  Yes  :  a  rhetorical  delusion." 

"  Not  at  all !  He  who  loveth  eternal  things  is 
eternal  love,  and  he  who  loveth  them  not  is  without 
eternal  life,  or,  what  is  the  same  thing,  without  God 
in  the  world.  People  are  just  that  which  the  char 
acter  of  their  love  makes  them.  The  best  philoso- 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  193 

phy,  the  best  conduct  of  life,  is  to  seek  to  know  the 
best  thing  and  to  love  it  with  all  one's  might. 
Therein  lies  the  thriftiness  of  the  soul  which  builds 
her  house  upon  a  rock." 

"  But  all  that  is  very  impracticable.  We  must 
attend  to  things  around  us,"  said  James. 

"  Certainly,  that  love  is  not  dead  :  its  life  is  virtue, 
unceasing  pursuit  of  the  eternal,  and  common  sense 
is  its  best  friend  and  helper.  I  look  upon  things 
from  an  eternal  point  of  view,  —  you  from  a  tempo 
ral.  All  things  are  divine,  and  nothing  is  more 
divine  than  being  truly  sensible  men  and  women. 
A  seer  is  not  a  visionary." 

"  That  sounds  very  well,  but  there  is  nothing 
substantial  to  it.  I  want  a  tangible  God." 

"  And  you  have  one  in  your  pocket." 

"  But,  be  serious  a  moment,  Malcolm,  what  would 
we  do  without  the  house  of  refuge  given  us  by  our 
Lord  and  Master  ?  " 

"  What  would  the  soft-backed  hermit  crab  do 
without  the  old,  worm-eaten  conch  into  which  it 
crawls  and  hides  itself,  all  but  the  claws,  which 
protrude  ready  to  catch  unsuspecting  marines  ? " 

"  That's  a  good  joke,  Malcolm.  I'll  laugh  at  it 
to-morrow  after  breakfast.  The  bell  has  rung  for 
prayers.  It  is  my  turn  to  officiate."  And  the  young 
priest  withdrew,  and  Malcolm  had  a  good  laugh  all 
to  himself. 

Poor  Bungle  !  thou  hast  shown  thy  white  feather, 

and    clucking   as    thou    hast    raised    thy    swan-like 

wings,  thou  hast  gathered  thy  chickens  under  them. 

O   Hub !  thou  art  a  hubbub,  and  in  the  Tower  of 

13 


!Q4  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

Babel  behold  thy  fate !  Thou  thinkest  to  build  a 
tower  of  words  that  will  touch  the  skies.  But  God 
confuses  thy  tongues  so  that  thy  work  remains 
always  barely  begun.  Thou  lookest  up :  why  not 
look  within  ? 

Hypocrisy  seems  to  have  become  quite  fashiona 
ble,  not  to  say  respectable,  but  more  worthy  of  its 
name  than  ever.  The  fact  is,  some  people  are  born 
with  so  great  a  genius  for  acting  that  they  naturally 
find  —  seeing  that  respectability  precludes  a  theatri 
cal  career  —  a  stage  in  the  Church  adapted  to  their 
merits  ;  or,  if  their  views  are  particularly  broad  and 
liberal,  they  grow  quite  optimistic,  and  act  upon 
the  assumption  that  "  all  the  world  is  "  not  only  "  a 
stage  "  of  renown,  but  also  "  an  oyster,"  mystically 
provided  for  their  enjoyment.  And  as  some  ani 
mals  —  the  hermit  crab,  for  instance  —  take  to  cast- 
off  shells,  they  adopt  what  is  left  of  the  expression 
of  the  grand  character  they  love  to  represent.  Nor 
is  this  acting  of  theirs  altogether  the  result  of  inhe 
rent  weakness,  as  in  the  case  of  the  crab.  On  the 
contrary,  it  appears  to  rise  from  the  strongest  re 
gard  for  others,  especially  for  ladies,  —  a  regard  so 
devout  and  tender-hearted  as  almost  to  deserve  the 
name  of  Liberal.  We  might  account  for  it  on  the 
hypothesis  that  they  have  already  attained  salva- 
.tion,  even  in  this  world,  as  the  elect  of  the  Lord, 
yet  naturally  growing  tired  of  the  great,  but  per 
haps  monotonous,  sweetness  of  their  Heavenly  Life, 
seek  to  vary  it  with  sundry  carnal  pleasures,  even 
as  Bagdad's  Caliph,  tired  of  his  luxurious  halls,  went 
out  in  disguise  to  seek  adventures  in  poor  localities. 


XV. 

JENNIE'S   ANSWER. 

MALCOLM  was  put  out  of  suspense  by  the 
following  letter :  — 

DEAREST  MALCOLM,  BRAGVILLE,  FRIDAY. 

How  am  I  to  answer  you  ?  Your  letter  is  bewildering. 
Give  up  Christ,  give  up  the  Church  ?  No :  you  cannot  be 
so  deluded.  Father  will  be  greatly  disappointed,  —  and  what 
am  I  to  do  ?  To  whose  voice  shall  I  give  ear  ?  I  am  on  the 
road  to  betterment,  and  dread  the  consequences  of  looking* 
back.  But  I  shall  keep  my  eyes  open,  as  you  advise,  and 
resist  the  impulse  of  the  moment.  There  is  truth  in  your 
parables,  and  I  will  possess  myself  of  it.  How  could  you  so 
deceive  us,  lulling  us  into  a  feeling  of  security,  and  then 
betray  us  in  this  way !  Yet,  how  can  I  blame  you,  seeing 
that  love  for  me  was  at  fault  in  one  instance,  and  love  for  the 
Truth  in  the  latter  ? 

My  affection  for  you  is  still  unaltered.  Have  no  fear.  I 
shall  never  forsake  you  for  a  difference  in  creed.  Your  mind, 
fired  by  a  love  of  Truth,  has  only  lighted  a  torch  whereby  I 
can  better  see  to  read  your  character.  But  that  is  still  a  mys 
tery  to  me  ;  for,  although  your  words  are  luminous,  I  feel  as 
if  I  were  looking  through  a  window  into  the  dark.  I  own 
what  you  say  about  the  church  is  not  wholly  untrue.  She 
must  have  some  weakness,  else  there  would  be  no  necessity 
for  her  continual  self-recommendation.  Is  Christianity  a 
criminal,  liable  to  conviction,  in  whose  favor  evidence  must 
be  collected  and  adduced  ?  But,  on  the  other  hand,  remem 
ber  the  good  which  the  gospel  has  done,  and  think  what  the 
world  would  have  been  without  it.  No  doubt  the  church,  in 
so  far  as  she  has  relied  on  human  instruments  alone,  has 

(195) 


196 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


failed  to  realize  her  great  ideal,  Christ,  in  this  earthly  exist 
ence,  which  realization  has  been  her  mission  from  the  first. 
And  it  is  possible  that  people  have  been  too  thirsty,  too  eager 
for  refreshment,  to  heed  the  impurities  which  inevitably  gather 
in  all  the  earthly  vessels  appointed  to  contain  the  waters  of 
salvation.  Therefore  it  may  be  well  for  you,  or  any  other 
truthful  person,  to  point  them  out  that  they  may  be  removed 
by  the  guardians  of  the  Faith.  But  why  not  fully  accept  the 
idea  of  invisible  fraternity  which  you  admire  in  the  church, 
and,  acting  upon  it,  avoid  all  dispute,  in  that  you  harmonize 
with  its  best  representation  ?  You  have  little  indulgence  for 
the  infirmities  of  your  kind.  What  though  the  minor  tenets 
of  the  church  fall  from  time  to  time,  like  the  effete  feathers 
of  a  bird  whose  flight  once  depended  on  them  ?  The  bird  is 
all  the  better  for  their  loss,  and  sings  more  sweetly  as  she 
flies  to  and  from  the  heavens  above.  And  you  deride  super 
stition  !  But  shall  there  not  be  a  vague  beyond  to  every  as 
cending  soul  ?  You  say  Mount  Progress  is  infinitely  high. 
Yet  who  gets  beyond  the  region  of  simple  goodness  ?  Heav 
en  is  there,  and  where  else  can  Christ  be  ?  O  Malcolm,  I 
fear  people  talk  too  much  about  Progress  !  That  word,  as 
well  as  the  name  of  Christ,  has  become  the  property  of  cant. 
You  have  not  heard  all  the  rose-water  talk  about  it,  especially 
in  regard  to  liberty  and  women,  current  in  Bragville  here. 

You  make  me  ashamed  of  my  vanity  in  asking  you  to  pro 
cure  so  expensive  a  shawl.  I  send  it  back,  at  a  reduction. 
Keep  the  money  yourself,  as  you  may  need  it.  It  may  be 
long  before  father  will  consent  to  our  union.  I  am  sorry  to 
say  that  he  is  still  under  the  influence  of  Dr.  Pluffle,  whose 
true  character  I  know  and  despise. 

It  may  be,  dear  Malcolm,  that  you  have  studied  too  hard, 
and  thereby  affected  the  balance  of  your  mind.  You  have 
heard  how  Dr.  Ethereal  Smart  injured  himself.  You  cannot 
be  too  careful  of  yourself.  I  often  wish  you  could  realize  the 
efficacy  of  prayer.  But  I  will  pray  for  you,  no  matter  how 
much  you  say  against  it,  —  in  word  as  well  as  in  persistent 
effort,  and  the  answer  shall  not  be  wanting. 

The  longer  I   dwell  on  the  singularity  of  your  views,  the 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


I97 


easier  I  think  it  is  for  you  to  adopt  a  more  moderate  way  of 
expressing  yourself.  Can  you  not  even  be  a  liberal  Christian, 
like  the  brilliant  Mr.  Piouswit  ?  Yet,  under  all  circumstances, 
adhere  to  the  Truth,  as  you  best  understand  it ;  and  what 
ever  you  do  will  not  be  far  in  the  wrong.  I  know  well  how 
anxiously  you  will  strive  to  reach  the  perfection  you  see  be 
fore  you.  Therefore  I  do  not  despair  of  a  happy  termination 
to  the  present  perplexity.  I  have  not  only  read  the  books 
you  sent,  but  striven  to  keep  up  with  you  in  the  study  of  the 
ology.  Yet  I  did  not  tell  you  this  before,  as  I  wished  to 
surprise  you.  I  hope  and  pray  you  will  carefully  consider  the 
step  you  have  taken.  Believe  me  to  be  yours  forever. 

JEXXIE. 

Malcolm,  though  not  unmoved  by  the  contents  of 
this  letter,  could  not  but  admire  the  tone  of  it.  He 
had  forced  her  to  think  radically,  and  he  was  aston 
ished  at  the  extent  of  her  knowledge.  "Poor  child!" 
said  he  to  himself,  "  thy  soul  is  superior  to  its  sur 
roundings,  and  would  fain,  if  it  only  had  light  suffi 
cient,  free  itself  entirely  from  them.  The  lily  has 
been  shaken,  and  some  of  the  aphides  have  fled. 
How  can  I  continue  to  help  her?  Words  are  of 
but  little  use  in  this  matter.  I  wish  I  were  beside 
her  again.  But  that  is  impossible.  I  cannot  go  to 
her  till  I  hear  from  her  father.  It  is  sheer  nonsense 
to  coax  ourselves  into  the  belief  that  there  is  any  sta 
bility  in  air  castles.  And  she  would  give  me  all  she 
had  to  bestow, —  no  :  I  cannot  accept  of  her  bounty. 
I  have  painfully  discovered  that  Earnest  Endeavor 
is  not  yet  dead.  Him  shall  I  invoke  to  my  aid,  and, 
backed  by  him,  there  is  no  such  thing  as  failure. 
Therefore,  here  be  it  resolved  :  I  shall  work,  and 
leave  all  else  to  the  Good.  Words  are  only  the  dust 
which  is  raised  by  the  chaript  wheels  of  Deeds,  and 


igS  RAINBOW  AND   REALITY. 

it  blinds  the  loungers  on  the  way.  I  will  leave  the 
pen  to  those  that  need  it.  There  is  enough  vain, 
incoherent  speech  in  the  world  without  the  addition 
of  mine.  And  if  my  hand  findeth  nothing  else  to 
do  there  still  remains  to  me  the  spade  of  manly 
labor.  That  shall  be  my  stay.  But  what  is  this 
phantom  discontent  that  I  feel  within  me,  and  from 
which  I  cannot  escape  ?  Discontent,  —  what  is  it  but 
the  absence  of  all  ^wz-tent  ?  Sheer  emptiness.  Am 
I  empty  or  am  I  full  ?  Alas !  I  have  been  more 
than  half  empty,  but  I  will  be  it  no  longer,  wife  or 
no  wife.  I  will  open  the  doors  of  my  being,  and  the 
heavens  and  the  earth,  —  all  shall  stream  in,  and  I 
will  be  the  universe  myself,  and  the  spade  shall  be 
my  Atlas." 


XVI. 

AN   OLD   STORY   RETOLD. 

FINALLY  Malcolm  sat  down  and  wrote  to  Jen 
nie,  telling  her  to  look  within  and  be  sure  to 
think  well  for  herself  before  accepting  the  thought 
of  another,  and  that,  if  she  would  but  earnestly 
seek,  she  would  be  as  likely  to  receive  inspiration 
from  God  as  any  of  the  ancient  prophets.  For  the 
rest,  he  told  her  his  happiness  would  be  to  assist 
her  in  every  conceivable  way  that  was  compatible 
with  the  present  circumstances,  as  he  would  not 
like  to  visit  her  until  he  had  heard  from  her  father. 
Then  he  wrote  to  her  father. 

He  had  no  sooner  finished  the  above  task  than 
Ernest  Hart,  one  of  the  best  young  men  in  the 
establishment,  knocked  at  the  door,  and,  Malcolm 
opening  it,  he  came  in.  He  came  with  the  inten 
tion  of  inviting  him  to  a  conference  meeting,  where 
he  had  been  asked  to  deliver  a  short  discourse. 

Malcolm  went,  and  had  another  opportunity 
of  seeing  the  consequence  of  telling  folk  what  they 
do  not  want  to  hear.  This  Mr.  Hart  was  guilty  of 
the  folly  of  dwelling  dangerously  long  upon  Bun- 
sen's  ideas,  which,  if  adopted  by  the  Church,  might 
help  her  much.  A  certain  chapter  in  "  God  in 
History "  had  taken  Mr.  Hart's  fancy,  and  he  was 
about  to  propound  what  he  gathered  from  it  to  a 

(i99) 


200  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

prayerful  auditory  which  met  for  mutual  consolation 
and  instruction. 

Mr.  Hart  spoke  as  follows  :  "  Abraham  is  a  gen 
uine  historic  character,  and  was  the  reformer  of  his 
day.  The  story  of  his  attempted  sacrifice  of  his  son 
plainly  points  to  that  fact.  Hear  the  true  version 
of  the  story :  Abraham  belonged  to  the  Semitic 
race,  the  Hebrews  forming  one  portion  of  it,  and 
the  Carthaginians  another.  The  Semites  were  re 
markable  for  the  vigor  of  their  superstition.  This 
characteristic  showed  itself  in  the  offering  up  of 
their  offspring  upon  the  altars  of  the  gods.  The 
Carthaginians,  even  in  the  most  flourishing  period 
of  their  national  existence,  were  addicted  to  that 
horrible  mode  of  worship ;  and  that  the  Hebrews 
were  likewise  given  to  the  same  is  evident  from  the 
words,  'And  he  defiled  Topheth,  which  is  in  the  val 
ley  of  the  children  of  Hinnom,  that  no  man  might 
make  his  son  or  his  daughter  to  pass  through  the 
fire  to  Molech.'"  (2  Kings  xxiii.  10.) 

"  However  barbarous  the  above  rite  may  seem  to 
us  to-day,  it  was  not  without  good  in  its  time.  It 
was  a  natural  consequence  of  the  intensity  of  the 
Semitic  religious  consciousness,  even  as  witch  and 
heretic  burning  was  a  proof  of  the  zeal  of  our  fore 
fathers.  The  Semite  gave  the  best  thing  he  had  to 
his  god,  and  if  his  faith  had  not  been  strong  enough 
to  enable  him  to  do  so  we  might  still  be  in  the 
power  of  a  superstition  worse  even  than  that  of  the 
Druids  from  whom  we  are  descended.  The  Semitic 
faith  being  the  strongest,  according  to  the  necessary 
struggle  for  existence  which  prevails  among  all  ani- 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  2OI 

mate  things,  necessarily  swallowe'd  up  the  weaker, 
and  fed  itself  upon  the  life  that  was  in  them.  Creeds 
are  thrown  pell-mell  into  the  world  and  grow  fat  or 
lean,  according  as  they  succeed  in  strangling  and 
devouring  one  another.  I  never  see  a  pond  which 
contains  many  kinds  of  fish  without  seeing  in  their 
contests  for  supremacy,  the  fights  and  bickerings  of 
not  only  all  the  Christian  sects,  but  of  all  the  reli 
gions  of  the  world.  Churches  are  not  only  houses 
of  God,  but  fortresses  of  God,  and  are  continually 
exchanging  shots. 

"  The  Semitic  faith  itself  is  like  the  mountain 
torrent,  which,  on  leaving  its  rocky  bed,  loses  its 
savage  character,  and,  taking  in  lesser  streams  as  it 
advances,  slowly  and  surely  widens  into  a  fair  and 
navigable  river.  During  the  first  Christian  century 
there  was  a  conflux  of  faiths  in  which  the  Semitic 
element  predominated,  as  our  religion  is  essentially 
Jewish,  and  neither  Greek  nor  Roman,  although  all 
time  has  made  it  what  it  now  is. 

"  The  voice  of  God  in  religious  custom  and  preju 
dice  naturally  calls  on  Abraham,  as  he  has  been 
brought  up  to  worship  Molech,  to  offer  up  Isaac,  his 
most  beloved  child,  on  the  altar  of  this  deity.  Not 
only  this  voice,  but  all  outward  circumstances  com 
bine  to  urge  this  duty  upon  him.  If  he  fails  to  do 
it  which  is  only  what  his  pious  neighbors  are  daily 
doing,  he  shall  be  scorned  and  upbraided  as  a  skep 
tic  who  loves  his  son  better  than  his  God. 

"  The  struggle  is  great  in  the  heart  of  the  parent. 
He  naturally  asks  himself  if  Molech  really  can  be 
so  exacting  as  to  rob  him  of  the  object  that  he 


202  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

holds  dearest  on  earth.  Molech  prevails.  The 
child  is  taken  from  play,  and  goes  with  his  father  to 
Mount  Moriah.  The  wood  at  last  is  gathered  and 
piled  into  a  heap  :  all  is  now  ready  for  the  consum 
mation  of  the  terrible  deed.  What  a  picture  ?  The 
tender  boy  lies  upon  the  fagots,  his  plaintive  cry, 
mingling  with  the  rustle  of  the  leaves  of  the  trees, 
sinks  deep  into  the  parental  heart,  his  dark  Hebrew 
eyes,  suffused  with  tears,  look  up  appealingly  to  the 
father's  face,  who,  attired  in  his  priestly  robes, 
stands  with  uplifted  knife,  ready  to  plunge  it  into 
his  quivering  bowels.  Hark !  an  angel  calls  from 
an  opening  in  the  sky.  It  is  the  voice  of  God  in 
Abraham's  reason  which  tells  him  to  sheathe  his 
knife  and  release  his  son,  as  Justice  requireth  not 
superfluous  blood. 

"  Accept  the  lesson.  Is  God  not  more  likely  to 
call  from  within,  from  the  place  where  Jesus  said 
the  kingdom  of  Heaven  lay,  than  from  the  clouds 
above  our  heads  ?  In  what  other  way  has  any  man 
in  any  age  or  in  any  clime  triumphed  over  the 
errors  of  the  Past,  and  given  ear  to  the  promptings 
of  a  higher  enlightenment  ?  Abraham  was  a  radi 
cal,  even  as  the  late  John  Brown,  who  has  given  to 
the  gallows  a  meaning  akin  to  that  of  the  Cross.  To 
which  voice  shall  we  listen,  to  that  of  the  Living  or 
to  that  of  the  Dead  ? " 

If  a  bombshell  had  fallen  into  the  midst  of  that 
prayerful  assembly  and  exploded,  greater  conster 
nation  could  not  have  been  exhibited.  Gradu 
ally  the  questions  obtruded  themselves  into  reflect 
ing  brains  :  Was  Jehovah  a  mere  myth  ?  Did  not 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  2O$ 

an  actual  angel  call  to  Abraham  from  the  sky  ? 
Was  Abraham  more  remarkable  for  "  poor  human 
reason"  than  the  faith  which  had  been  the  subject 
of  a  billion  sermons  ?  Could  it  be  that  Drs.  Lul 
laby,  Bungle,  Buzz,  and  the  whole  Rainbow  Creed 
World  were  wrong  and  this  daring  youth  was 
right  ?  Deacons  opened  wide  their  sleepy  eyes  and 
gazed,  with  eager  solicitude  depicted  on  their  faces, 
upon  the  tender  youth  present  to  ascertain  if  they 
had  been  injured  by  this  bolt  of  heresy.  Old  ladies 
looked  alarmed  and  clasped  their  prayer-books  con 
vulsively,  as  if  they  thought  the  Evil  One  had 
appeared  upon  the  platform.  The  young  people 
seemed  bewildered,  and  the  children  tittered  and 
stared.  A  long  pause  followed  the  sitting  down  of 
Mr.  Hart. 

At  last,  in  a  far-away  corner  of  the  hall,  a  shrill 
voice  broke  -the  appalling  silence.  It  was  little  red 
headed  Brown's,  who,  inwardly  exultant  over  this 
chance  of  knocking  a  heresy  on  the  head  and 
thereby  adding  to  his  reputation  as  a  defender  of 
the  faith,  had  arisen,  and  was  now  shouting,  "  I  be 
lieve  in  the  faith  of  Abraham,  of  Isaac  and  of 
Jacob,  as  it  is  given  us  here  in  this  book  of  books 
which  has  been  handed  down  to  us  from  genera 
tion  to  generation  of  saints,  unaltered  and  intact. 
Without  the  inspired  contents  of  this  volume  (and 
he  raised  his  Bible  aloft),  O  brethren  in  the  Lord, 
where  would  we  be  ?  What  hold  or  stay  would  we 
have  in  this  wicked  world  which  surges  round  us 
like  a  sea."  And  so  he  went  on  for  half  an  hour  in 
a  most  doleful  tone. 


204  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

A  number  followed  him  and  talked  diffusely 
about  breaking  "  the  great  compass,"  "  only  guide," 
and  so  forth.  When  the  meeting  was  over,  if  little 
red-headed  Brown  had  just  landed  on  the  wharf 
after  saving  at  the  risk  of  his  own  life  that  of  an 
other,  the  by-standers  could  not  have  shaken  his 
hand  more  cordially  than  did  the  "  humble  follow 
ers  "  on  this  occasion,  while  Mr.  Hart,  whose  her 
esy  was  only  an  open  respect  for  a  self-evident  truth, 
was  scowled  upon  and  regarded  with  looks  of  pity. 
Malcolm  was  not  astonished.  He  had  seen  the 
same  thing  occur  before. 

As  Ernest  had  to  go  in  a  different  direction,  Mal 
colm  returned  home  in  company  with  Rev.  Heze- 
kiah  Graves. 

That  gentleman  taught  the  boys  to  write  funeral 
sermons.  He  was  a  well-meaning  man,  but  very 
superstitious. 

He  was  profoundly  shocked  by  the  heresy  of  Mr. 
Hart.  "  Verily,"  said  he  to  Malcolm,  "  I  am  much 
grieved  to  find  all  my  labor  upon  him  has  been 
lost.  Had  it  been  you  or  some  of  the  others,  it 
would  not  have  troubled  me  so  much  ;  for  you  are 
not  gifted  to  be  of  comfort  to  bereaved  friends.  He 
can  pray  beautifully.  What  unction  !  what  a  voice  ! 
I  fear  he  will  fall  into  the  hands  of  the  radical  Uni 
tarians,  for  we  cannot  suffer  so  open  a  heretic  in 
our  ranks.  Alas  !  many  are  called,  few  are  chosen. 
To  deny  Father  Abraham,  too,  —  to  throw  away  his 
faith  at  the  bidding  of  Bunsen.  'Tis  too  bad." 

Scarcely  able  to  repress  the  laugh  that  rose  to  his 
lips,  Malcolm  hardly  knew  what  to  say  to  this  com- 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  2O$ 

mander  of  the  faithful.  Finally,  looking  up  at  his 
lofty  forehead,  he  contrived  to  say  reflectively,  "  I 
have  always  thought,  Dr.  Graves  that  if  you  had 
less  veneration  you  might  have  held  a  much  higher 
position  in  the  denomination." 

"  I  hardly  think  so,"  replied  Dr.  Graves  with  a 
shudder.  "Veneration  has  been  of  immense  ser 
vice  to  me  at  funerals."  And  he  expressed  as  much 
as  to  say,  "  That  in  my  opinion  is  not  the  least  im 
portant  part  of  the  profession." 


XVII. 


THE   MODERN    STAKE. 


T 


HAT    evening   Hart    rushed    into   Malcolm's 
room  with  the  following  letter  in  his  hand  : 


CHURCH  OF  THE  SEVENTY-FIVE  APOSTLES. 
MR.  ERNEST  HART, 

Rev.  Hezekiah  Graves  and  a  delegation  of  three  from  Hor- 
tatorial  Hall,  Tabernacle  Street,  have  lodged  a  complaint  with 
us  against  you. 

It  appears  that  you  have  wantonly,  and  in  the  most  unheard 
of  manner,  despised  or  misconstrued  the  letter  of  sacred  writ: 
in  one  word,  that  you  have  with  your  infidel  views  so  shocked 
the  religious  sensibilities  and  sacred  convictions  of  a  number 
of  our  people  as  to  make  it  incumbent  upon  us,  the  guardi 
ans  of  the  Faith,  to  let  you  know  that,  injustice  to  the  cause 
to  which  we  have  devoted  our  lives,  we  can  no  longer  tolerate 
your  presence  in  Huberton  University. 

Hoping,  trusting,  praying  that  you  will  in  time  be  graciously 
permitted  to  see  the  error  of  your  ways,  we  remain  dutifully, 
Yours  in  Christ, 

ORATONE  Buzz,  D.D. 
SIMON  LULLABY,  LL.D. 
JOSIAH  TRAMMELS. 
ABLE  THUNDERHEAD,  D.D. 
BENJAMIN  TIGHTCREED. 

A  long  pause  followed  the  reading  of  this  letter. 
Malcolm  spoke  first,  saying :  "  That's  why,  Ernest, 
so  many  ministers  seem  as  if  they  had  been  created 
by  measure,  and  cut  into  pieces  from  five  to  six  feet 

(206) 


RAINBOW  AND   REALITY. 


207 


long,  each  piece  being  set  up  to  sprout  in  the  sun 
like  willow  fence-posts." 

"  Yes,  all  originality  is  pruned  off,  and  the  bare 
stern  is  left  with  little  or  no  verdure.  P.  Bungle  is 
the  only  one  in  the  Independent  Spirit  Navigation 
Denomination  who  has  any  claim  to  genius,  and 
even  he  is  spoiled  by  his  devil-pacificatoriness. 
But,  fortunately,  I  can't  complain.  I've  got  a  good 
situation  on  '  The  Weekly  Flapjack,'  the  first  Dar 
winian  paper  in  the  country." 

"  Indeed  !  "  exclaimed  Malcolm.  "  I  told  you  it 
was  impossible  to  get  persecuted,  unless  by  one's 
own  self,  in  these  advanced  times." 

"  How  you  do  talk,  Malcolm  !  To  say  the  least, 
the  proposed  insertion  of  God  in  the  Constitution  is 
frightfully  ominous.  We  must  be  on  our  guard  ; 
but,  with  Darwin  for  our  guide,  I  see  nothing  to 
hinder  complete  emancipation  from  Christian  super 
stitions." 

"  I  wish  you  joy  with  your  emancipations  ;  but 
don't  forget  that  Christ  reconciles  man  with  God, 
while  Darwin  reconciles  man  with  monkey.  Whose 
atonement  do  you  prefer  ? " 

"  For  shame,  Malcolm,  to  ridicule  the  Sacred 
Truths  of  Science !  " 

"  For  which,  Ernest,  you  are  ready  to  undergo 
martyrdom  on  '  The  Weekly  Flapjack.'  O  ye  shades 
of  Cranmer,  Latimer,  and  Huss,  what  say  ye  to 
this  ?  There  is  not  enough  Religion  left  to  hang 
an  infidel.  But  excuse  me,  Ernest,  I  have  to  read 
Shaft's  '  Straw  Kin?. '  " 


XVIII. 

TRANSMIGRATION. 

THE  professors  were  benevolent ;  and  alive  them 
selves  to  all  the  advantages  of  Supernaturalism 
so-called,  they  sought  to  make  the  students  share  in 
this  Alladin's  lamp  of  spiritual  illumination.  "  But 
somehow  or  other,"  as  Dr.  Buzz  pompously  remarked, 
"  some  young  men  have  a  most  incomprehensible  an 
tipathy  to  the  miracles,  ascribable  alone  to  the  eccen 
tricities  of  the  brilliant  leaders  in  modern  literature." 
Yet  again  and  again,  with  vigor  ever  renewed,  but 
ever  fruitlessly  expended,  the  professors  besieged  the 
minds  of  the  skeptical.  Such  as  James  Singleface 
and  little  Brown,  who  "  could  not  afford  to  be  any 
thing  but  sound  Christians,"  and  only  thought  to  fol 
low  the  example  of  their  teachers,  gave  them  no 
trouble  at  all.  Now,  had  these  two  been  able  to  lay 
bare  the  contents  of  their  minds,  they  might  have 
said,  "  No  :  it  cannot  be  that  Dr.  A.,  whose  pen, 
employed  by  the  first  newspapers,  nets  him  a  hun 
dred  dollars  an  hour,  is  wrong ;  or  Dr.  B.,  who  has 
written  twenty  books,  enumerating  all  the  steps  from 
Atheism  to  Theism  ;  or  is  it  possible  that  Dr.  C., 
with  his  congregation  of  five  thousand,  and  steeple 
four  hundred  feet  above  the  level  of  the  sea,  can  be 
wrong,  preaching,  as  he  does,  in  a  pulpit  not  un- 
.like  the  throne  of  Delhi,  while  gothic  windows, 

(208) 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 


.209 


grand,  vast,  circular,  vomit  rainbows  on  the  floor  ? 
No  ;  a  murrain  upon  your  atheism.  We  shall  stand 
up  for  Jesus."  So  Singleface  and  Brown  parted  their 
hair  in  the  middle,  and  became  men  after  the  Fac 
ulty's  own  heart. 

Now,  there  were  in  the  college  six  students,  at 
least,  who  would  not  accept  Jehovah's  crowns  of 
glory,  all  ablaze  as  they  were  with  miracles  for  gems, 
and  fit  for  immediate  wear.  Nay,  they  even  refused 
to  try  them  on,  to  the  mingled  annoyance  and  com- 
.passion  of  the  monarchs  of  the  Church.  Loaves  and 
fishes,  Lazarus,  Gabriel,  and  Jonah,  and  many  other 
inviting  objects,  were  duly  tendered  on  the  golden 
salvers  of  custom  and  tradition.  But  no  !  The  infi 
dels  said  they  were  Republicans,  and  protested 
against  all  royalty,  including  even  that  of  the  great 
I  Am.  Malcolm  and  his  friend,  Arthur  Bestface, 
the  type  of  Christian  sincerity,  told  them  repeatedly 
that  it  was  not  worth  their  while  to  contend  about 
this  small  matter  ;  but  they  were  determined  to  have 
their  own  way,  and  so  capsized  the  said  salvers  when 
ever  they  were  offered  them,  and  trampled  the  ge'.ns 
beneath  their  feet.  Ernest  Hart  was  the  ringleader  ; 
but  he  ought  to  have  known  better.  O  Ernest,  the 
student,  if  he  wishes  to  do  good,  has  something  else 
to  do  besides  smashing  images.  Baby  Tom  put  out 
the  eyes  of  his  sister's  doll,  and  got  well  whipped 
for  his  ill-nature. 

Finally  the  professors  concluded  that  it  was  high 

time  to  give  the  Apollyon  of  heresy  a  deadly  thrust ; 

and  they  stretched  forth  their  hands  for  the  sword 

of  Logic  (for  that  of  Good  Faith  lay  broken  on  the 

14 


210  RAINBOW  AND   REALITY. 

ground).  But  the  enemy  was  prepared.  Ernest  Hart 
drew  caricatures  of  the  anticipated  thrust,  and  pasted 
them  on  the  chapel  door, —  to  this  effect :  Supernatur- 
alism  represented  as  a  balloon,  spun  like  a  top  over  a 
few  odd  trees  ;  and  the  professors  were  the  aeronauts, 
doing  their  best  to  land,  despite  the  opposition  of  the 
whirlwind.  The  grappling-irons  were  the  miracles, 
and  the  trees  were  the  students.  Dr.  Lullaby  had 
the  "  Gedarene  Maniac  "  under  his  arm  ;  Dr.  Bungle 
dangled  "  the  herd  of  swine  ;"  Dr.  Buzz  had  the  "  im 
maculate  conception  "  tied  round  his  waist ;  and  Mr. 
Graves  had  the  "  Resurrection  "  in  his  pocket.  When 
the  irons  caught  in  a  small  tree,  they  whisked  it  off 
the  ground,  and,  after  making  it  describe  a  circle  or 
two,  dropped  it  flat  ;  but  finally,  when  the  irons 
caught  in  an  old  oak,  deep  rooted  in  the  earth,  —  a 
genuine  tusk  of  Cerberus,  —  the  balloon  was  speared 
in  the  side,  and  the  world  was  deluged  with  gas. 

"  Thus  collapsed  Supernaturalism,"  said  Mr.  Hart, 
whereat  Mr.  Religious  Life  cried  in  loud  voice,  "  Thus 
perishes  preternaturalism  or  vulgar  miracle-ism.  The 
grand  fruit  on  the  Tree  of  Life  has  ripened  on  the 
husk  of  Revelation,  as  it  has  been  given  to  the 
Greek,  as  well  as  to  the  Jew  and  to  the  Roman,  and 
also  to  the  Saxon.  How  mysterious  the  growth  of 
the  ear  of  maize !  first  the  tender  shoot,  and  then 
the  fluttering  flag,  and  soon  the  silk  and  the  spool ; 
and  when  the  pollen  has  dropped,  how  skillfully  the 
pearls  are  strung,  and  hidden  in  the  green  casket ! 
Thus  the  growth  of  the  Word  !  Every  image  is  a 
casket,  and  the  Truth  is  the  pearls  within.  O  mys 
tery  of  mysteries,  the  unfolding  of  the  germ  and  the 


RAINBOW  AND  REALITY.  2II 

transfusion  of  the  gathering  juices  ;  of  that  which 
fallcth  into  the  ground  and  dieth,  and  also  of  that 
which  is  ground  into  the  bread  of  Life  !  Deep,  im 
penetrable,  altogether  inscrutable  art  thou  ;  and  the 
highest  I  can  do  is  to  wonder,  wonder,  and  wonder 
again.  Oh,  woe  to  him  who  seeth  naught  in  the 
inimitable  art  of  God  but  the  freakishness  of  that 
huge  Leviathan  called  Nature  !  for  he  is  blind  to 
the  things  of  the  Spirit.  But  even  I  am  blind  to 
much  that  is.  So  let  me  grope  on  and  on  ;  and  by 
and  by  I  shall  leave  this  cave  on  whose  walls,  as 
Plato  tells,  the  shades  of  a  Reality  as  yet  unseen 
fall  and  flit  ominously  across  my  path,  dim-lighted 
by  the  fires  of  my  Passions,  —  but  even  here  Imagina 
tion  fails.  And  so,  like  Plato  before  me,  I  blend  with 
the  vacuity  of  my  own  words,  and  sink  exhausted  to 
die.  Yes,  even  Plato  had  water,  —  word-water  on  the 
brain,  —  it  put  out  his  fire,  —  and  it  is  well  that  he, 
in  his  Socrates,  confesses  that  he  knows  nothing. 
But  now,  Reason  herself  is  baffled,  for  Nothing  is 
Death  ;  and,  since  Death  is  not  at  all,  there  is  no 
Nothing.  Thus  Affirmation  recommences  where  I 
thought  it  ended,  and  I  rise  again  out  of  the 
grave  of  words  to  reappear  unto  those  who  refuse 
to  believe  that  Life  Eternal  is  the  inalienable  pos 
session  of  the  Just.  O  joyful  descent  into  Hell ! 
thrice  joyful  transfiguration,  and  most  glorious  as 
cension,  infinite  as  God,  yet  more  incomprehensible 
than  Evil !  Thus  I  pray,  having  died  in  the  word 
as  I  have  died  in  the  flesh,  on  the  cross  of  Endeavor, 
on  the  cross  of  Prejudice,  on  the  cross  of  Fanaticism, 
and  on  the  cross  of  Virtuous  Resolution,  —  a  per- 


212  RAINBOW  AND  REALITY. 

petual  Jesus,  an  everlasting  Prometheus,  a  wander 
ing  Jew,  and  a  stationary  Christian.  But  there  is  no 
reward  for  me  but  the  good  that  I  do  ;  for,  the  mo 
ment  I  stoop  to  enjoy  the  fruit  of  my  labor,  I  am 
again  undone,  and  must  be  crucified  afresh,  and  that 
by  my  own  hand.  So  blame  me  not,  my  brother, 
for  the  poverty  of  the  hope  that  I  give  thee,  and  for 
the  hard  task  I  would  fain  impose  upon  thee  ;  for, 
verily,  if  thou  doest  not  as  I  have  done,  do  now,  and 
will  forever  do,  it  were  better  for  thee  to  go  down 
this  moment  into  the  grave  which  is  prepared  for 
thee.  Yet  thou  thinkest  the  yoke  of  Jesus  was 
light ;  and  thou  preferest  it  to  mine.  But  know 
that  I,  Religious  Life,  am  the  Saviour  ;  and  unless 
thou  believest  in  me,  in  one  or  other  of  my  manifold 
forms,  thou  shall  surely  sink  under  the  cross  of  the 
Devil,  and  I  shall  be  crucified  again  in  thy  barbarous 
soul.  Thus  I  go  on  my  knees  before  thee,  O  vilest 
of  the  vile,  and  beseech  thee,  even  as  I  tolerate  thy 
Judas-kiss,  to  go  and  sin  no  more.  Have  mercy  upon 
me,  O  world,  and  mock  not  with  thy  indifference, — • 
thy  vinegar  and  sponge,  —  the  gift  of  Infinite  Com 
passion." 


BOOK    III. 

RECONCILIATION. 


(213; 


I. 

A   COUPLE  OF   MIRACLE   PROTECTORS. 

WE  must  apologize,  O  reader,  for  again  bring 
ing  the  Rev.  Jehosaphat  PlufHe  into  your 
presence  ;  as  we  have  no  doubt  that  you  must  feel 
like  the  elder's  wife  when  her  husband  brought 
home  to  tea  a  certain  minister  whom  she  detested. 
That  good  lady,  being  sent  up  stairs  for  the  best 
Bible  in  order  that  family  worship  might  be  held, 
found,  when  she  was  returning  to  the  parlor,  Bible 
in  hand,  the  said  minister  in  the  hall  taking  off  his 
over-shoes,  and,  mistaking  him  for  her  husband,  she 
brought  the  book  of  books  down  with  terrific  force 
upon  his  stooping  shoulders,  whispering  savagely, 
"  I  told  you,  sir,  not  to  bring  that  man  here  again." 

Deacon  Crisp  and  Dr.  Pluffle  sat  at  the  breakfast 
table.  The  fair  Miss  Crisp  presided.  She  did  not 
look  so  bright  as  usual,  nor  was  she  so  carefully 
attired. 

The  gentlemen  were  in  the  best  of  moods  ;  for 
they  had  recently  attended  a  grand  conference  of 
the  Continental  Miracle  Protection  Association 
which  had  been  unusually  successful.  They  were 
now  talking  about  the  immense  amount  of  good 
which  it  had  done  in  the  world.  What  that  good 
has  been  we  have  long  tried  to  ascertain.  We 
never  could  see  anything  in  that  miraculous  institu- 

(215) 


2l6  RECONCILIATION. 

tion  but  a  sort  of  an  Aunt  Sally,  established  ex 
pressly  for  the  amusement  of  infidels.  For  no  sooner 
does  it  appear  with  a  new  version  of  the  miracles  in 
its  pious  mouth  than  the  same  is  immediately 
knocked  out  by  the  irresistible  missiles  of  Science. 

"  Upon  my  word,"  said  the  deacon,  helping  his 
guest  to  a  fish-ball,  "  that  was  a  splendid  discourse 
of  Dr.  Scartippet  the  night  before  last.  The  foe  had 
not  a  single  leg  left  to  stand  upon.  The  objections 
of  the  spiritualists  disappeared  like  dew  before  the 
sun.  I  was  so  delighted  with  the  fine  points  he 
made  that  I  spent  two  hours  yesterday  in  hunting 
up  a  suitable  present  for  him.  Finally  I  fixed  upon 
the  largest  Bible  I  could  find,  and  sent  it  to  him  as 
a  slight  token  of  my  gratitude.  A  dozen  more  like 
him  in  this  wicked  world  of  ours,  and  the  millen 
nium  is  fairly  inaugurated." 

"It  was  truly  a  wonderful  discourse,"  said  PlufHe. 
"  For  a  surety  it  did  justice  to  the  Paulinian  idea.  I 
will  trouble  you  for  a  little  bit  of  mutton  :  fish-balls 
do  not  agree  with  me.  I  suffer  a  trifle  from  dys 
pepsia." 

"  I  thought  you  were  quite  well  now,"  said  the 
deacon. 

"Well,  I  can't  say  that  I  suffer  so  much  as  I 
used  to.  But  I  was  just  about  to  tell  you,  speaking 
of  Dr.  Scartippet  that  the  great  difficulty  in  the  way 
of  us  miracle  protectors  is  not  so  much  the  logic  of 
the  infidel,  for  that  is  beyond  the  reach  of  the 
masses,  but  his  sacrilegious  humor,  and  his  irrev 
erent  jokes.  But  few  will  take  the  trouble  to  follow 
long  arguments  on  either  side.  Our  strength  lies  in 


KE  CONCILIA  TION.  2 1  / 

our  steady,  long-suffering  and  persevering  piety ; 
theirs,  in  disgraceful  mockery  of  sacred  things. 
The  Evil  One  has  changed  his  tactics,  and  to-day 
his  most  destructive  weapon  is  mirth.  That  is 
why,"  continued  Dr.  Pluffle,  taking  this  opportunity 
to  grind  his  own  axe,  with  a  sly  look  at  Crisp, 
"  I  thought  Mr.  Lawson  was  not  likely  to  become 
strong  in  the  faith.  His  levity  has  cost  me  more 
than  one  serious  thought." 

"  What  you  say  is  mostly  true,"  replied  the  dea 
con.  "  The  scoffer  is  worse  than  the  serious  skeptic. 
But  I  think  your  alarm  about  Malcolm  is  needless. 
He  is  truly  light-hearted  enough,  and  may  have 
been  a  little  profane.  However,  as  he  proved  him 
self  to  be  honest  and  sincere  in  other  respects,  I 
have  great  faith  in  him.  He  cannot  resist  the 
example  of  such  lights  as  Rev.  Oratone  Buzz  and 
Rev.  Progressive  Bungle ;  and  Hezekiah  Graves  will 
have  a  most  salutary  effect  upon  him.  Furthermore, 
the  Lord  is  always  with  the  honest  and  sincere." 

"  Not  so ! "  cried  Dr.  Pluffle,  putting  his  cup 
down  so  quickly  that  the  teaspoon  jingled  in  the 
saucer.  "  Spinoza,  Parker,  Emerson,  and  a  thousand 
others,  have  been  honest,  and  yet  denied  '  Him  cru 
cified  '  as  vehemently  as  did  Lucifer  himself,  and  as 
skillfully.  The  mere  morality  of  man,  unless  it  is 
sustained  by  the  recognition  of  Christ's  merits, 
turneth  to  naught  and  has  no  weight  with  God." 

"  I  must  say  I  think  you  go  a  little  too  far, 
Brother  Pluffle.  I  can't  help  liking  an  honest  man, 
no  matter  what  he  believes,  although  I  may  sin 
cerely  deplore  his  fate  hereafter." 


2 1 8  RE  CONCILIA  TION. 

"  Oh,  Mr.  Crisp  !  do  not  shut  your  eyes  to  the  lit 
tleness  of  man  without  the  chastening  influence  of 
the  Spirit.  There  is  no  good  in  us,  —  no,  not  any. 
What  is  man  that  thou  art  mindful  of  him  ? " 

"  Another  cup  of  coffee,  Dr.  Pluffle  ? "  asked  the 
absent-minded  Jennie,  whose  red  eyes  betokened 
the  state  of  her  heart. 

Dr.  Pluffle  started  at  the  interruption,  and,  after 
thanking  her,  resumed,  "  What  has  been  the  object 
of  our  labors  and  that  of  our  beloved  association  of 
protectors  ?  Has  it  been  to  strengthen  mere  human 
morality,  or  to  defend  the  empire  of  the  Lord  ? 
Take  for  an  example  that  infidel,  James  Obstinate, 
residing  in  the  next  street,  who  turns  John  Locke 
into  a  Bible,  and  represents  the  class  for  whom 
we  have  done  so  much  —  why !  he  is,  in  a  secular 
sense,  a  tolerably  honest  sort  of  man.  What  do  you 
think  he  said  the  other  day  after  I  had  drawn  a 
touching  picture  of  the  infidel's  death-bed  ? " 

"  What  then  ?  "  replied  Crisp. 

"  He  said,"  resumed  Pluffle,  in  a  solemn  tone, 
"  Three  times  have  I  been  on  the  point  of  death 
already :  it  gave  me  no  concern  whatever.'  '  But 
were  you  not/  I  inquired,  '  alarmed  in  the  least 
on  the  approach  of  the  King  of  Terrors  ? '  '  No, ' 
he  replied,  '  far  from  that  ;  I  threatened  to  take 
him  by  the  nose  should  he  trouble  me  again,  with 
out  purpose.' " 

Here  Dr.  Pluffle  looked  round  with  an  air  of  tri 
umph. 

"  The  ungodly  rascal  ! "  exclaimed  the  deacon 
sympathetically,  thoroughly  astonished  at  the  hardi- 


RE  CONCILIA  TION.  2 1 9 

hood  of  the  infidel,  vividly  recalling  the  moment 
when,  frantic  with  fear,  he  besought  the  assist 
ance  of  Malcolm  on  board  the  sinking  steamer, 
while  Jennie,  remembering  what  Malcolm  had  told 
her  about  parrots,  and  acutely  feeling  the  shallow- 
ness  of  Pluffle,  who  was  so  shocked  at  the  idea  of 
the  King  of  Terror's  nose,  could  not  restrain  a 
burst  of  laughter.  The  gentlemen  stared  at  her 
in  blank  amazement.  But  the  more  fixedly  they 
stared,  the  more  she  laughed.  At  last  her  father 
arose,  and  told  her  sternly  that  unless  she  showed 
more  regard  for  his  guest  she  must  retire  to  her 
own  room.  Upon  this  she  repressed  her  mirth,  and 
in  a  short  time  they  all  resumed  their  meal. 

Dr.  Pluffle  was  discomfited.  The  idea  of  any 
one  laughing  where  the  King  of  Terrors  was  con 
cerned  !  But  then  he  had  his  favorite  viand  to  con 
sole  himself. 

Before  the  meal  was  over  the  postman  rang,  and 
a  letter  was  brought  in  and  handed  to  the  Deacon. 
"  It  is  from  Malcolm,"  said  he  as  he  opened  it.  Jen 
nie  turned  pale  and  resorting  to  her  handkerchief, 
kept  her  eyes  intently  fixed  upon  her  father's  face. 
He  turned  white  and  crimson  alternately  as  he 
perused  it.  He  rapidly  reached  the  end,  and  was 
about  to  cry  aloud,  but,  recollecting  himself,  he  began 
and  re-read  it  with  the  closest  attention.  Then 
throwing  it  across  the  table  to  PlufHe,  he  groaned 
aloud  and  said,  "  There  is  some  mystery  in  that, 
Pluffle  ;  for  God's  sake  read  that  letter.  It  beats 
all.  I  never  saw  the  like  before.  Resign  not  only 
his  Redeemer,  the  salvation  of  his  soul,  but  his  girl 


220  RECONCILIATION. 

here  and  all  his  prospects  !  What  in  all  the  world 
has  come  over  him?"  And  the  deacon  glared  wildly 
upon  his  daughter,  who,  unable  to  restrain  her  tears, 
left  the  room.  Dr.  Pluffle  read  the  letter  aloud,  and 
his  eyes  sparkled  as  he  came  to  the  choicest  "  infi 
del"  bits  and  emphasized  them.  It  ran  thus  :  — 

DEAR  SIR, — 

Love  of  Truth  compels  me  to  be  frank.  I  came  here,  as  I 
said  in  the  beginning,  to  learn  the  truth,  and  having,  as  I 
think,  thus  far  faithfully  performed  this  task,  —  except  when, 
for  a  short  time,  I  wickedly  delayed  this  communication,  —  I 
acquaint  you  with  the  results  of  my  labor.  Please  understand 
me.  I  gladly  affirm  the  fact  of  Revelation,  as  it  has  been 
given  to  all  men,  and  to  Christians  in  particular.  And  I  do 
not  deny  that  the  Orthodox  Scheme  of  Salvation,  as  experi 
enced  by  the  believer,  is  true,  as  a  scheme.  But  please  to 
dwell  upon  the  word  "  scheme,"  for  my  idea  hinges  upon  that. 
I  see  in  your  creed,  intellectually  considered,  a  design  or  con 
trivance  to  effect  the  salvation  of  man  from  all  Harm  or  Evil, 
but  no  more  than  that.  Language  is  the  garment  of  thought, 
and  creeds  are  clothes  of  religious  ideas  ;  and,  since  I  expe 
rience  the  painful  fact  that  your  creed  no  longer  suits  the 
mind  of  man,  —  for  even  the  sanctity  of  its  letter  is  violated 
flagrantly  by  progressive  ministers, —  I  prefer  to  think  out  a 
creed  for  myself,  or  to  weave  a  garment  for  my  own  religious 
being.  My  spirit,  as  it  were,  has  gone  through  a  key-hole,  and 
left  its  cloak  behind. 

Men  re-act  against  the  ideas  of  their  innate  deviltry,  and 
refer  all  goodness  to  themselves  rather  than  to  God  ;  hence 
the  egotism  of  the  radicals,  whose  great  guns  levelled  against 
the  popular  theologies  blow  them  to  fragments  ;  and  hence, 
indeed,  the  mental  restlessness  of  the  age,  which  seeks  relief 
in  Romanism,  ritualism,  dilettanteism,  sectarianism,  and  in  the 
most  decided  infidelity  to  all  that  smacks  of  Divinity. 

For  my  part,  I  have  to  say  that  my  faith  in  the  Eternal 
Providence  of  God  remains  unshaken ;  and  such  is  my  ego- 


RECONCILIA  TION.  22 1 

tism  that  I  seek  to  identify  myself  with  him  in  every  particu 
lar.  Thought,  however,  even  the  thought  of  God,  is  nothing 
unless  it  is  realized  in  living  acts,  and  for  this  reason  I  re 
nounce  metaphysics  and  theory,  save  in  so  far  as  they  spring 
from  the  spontaneous  activity  of  my  own  mind,  which  I  place 
under  the  curb  of  a  universally  acknowledged  moral  will.  To 
this  end,  namely,  to  the  palpable  realization  of  the  best  ideas, 
I  become  an  artist,  and  see  no  end  to  the  improvement  before 
me.  Jesus  to  me  still  remains  one  of  the  grandest  thoughts  of 
Deity,  but,  mark  you,  only  a  thought,  for  do  not  we  ourselves 
possess  the  gift  of  Eternal  Providence  ?  and  it  were  mere 
idolatry  in  us  to  make  Jesus  other  than  the  man  he  was.  And 
in  regard  to  his  vicarious  atonement,  it  is  obvious  that  that  is 
simply  the  doctrine  of  our  common  duty,  namely,  infinite  self- 
sacrifice  for  the  good  of  others,  with  whom  our  own  welfare  is 
inextricably  bound  up.  But  I  need  say  no  more  than  this  :  it 
is  my  unalterable  conviction,  arrogant  as  it  seems  that  unless 
the  Christian  Church  adopts  the  simple  idea  which  I,  a  poor 
student,  now  faintly  forecast,  she  will  be  swept  away  like  a 
house  that  is  built  on  the  s:\nd.  Thus  reconstruction,  intel 
lectual  reconstruction,  or  radical  reform,  becomes  my  aim, 
and  I  now  conclude,  hoping  to  receive  your  approbation,  and. 
in  time,  to  clear  myself  of  all  chaos  and  obscurity.  In  sym- 
pathy  with  all  religious  activity,  MALCOLM  LAWSON. 

The  deacon  was  quite  puzzled  by  the  above. 
However,  he  saw  enough  to  assure  him  that  Mal 
colm  was  anything  but  sound,  in  his  favorite  sense 
ol  that  word.  And  he  felt  sick  at  heart ;  for  he 
really  loved  the  boy.  The  warm  sincerity  of  the 
letter  touched  his  heart,  and  made  him  think 
deeply,  while  Dr.  Pluffle —  his  eye  gleaming  with 
an  evil  light  —  began  :  "  I  told  you  so,  Brother 
Crisp.  Honesty,  mere  human  honest)r,  is  no  safe 
guard  against  infidelity.  He  has  gone  the  road  of 
the  rest.  Oh,  this  impious  and  godless  age  !  How 


222  RECONCILIA  TION. 

thankful  we  ought  to  be  that  the  blessed  little  band 
of  the  Continental  Miracle  Protection  Association 
remaineth  to  illuminate  the  straight  and  narrow  path 
that  leads  unto  salvation.  Let  us  pray,  O  brother 
in  the  Lord,  for  this  erring  youth,  who  knows  not 
what  he  does,  who  has  eyes  to  see  and  yet  does  not 
see,  who  has  ears  to  hear  and  yet  does  not  hear." 

Deacon  Crisp  did  not  open  his  lips.  He  appeared 
wrapt  in  deep  thought.  Dr.  Pluffle  wondered  at 
his  silence,  but  kept  on :  "  Many  are  indeed  called, 
but  few  are  chosen.  Let  us  renew  our  efforts  to 
lead  the  erring  into  the  right  path." 

"Ye. blind  guides!"  ejaculated  the  deacon,  who 
was  still  immersed  in  thought,  without  looking  up 
and  in  an  absent  manner,  as  if  he  knew  not  what 
he  was  saying. 

"  What ! "  exclaimed  Jehosaphat  Pluffle,  opening 
his  eyes  wider  with  astonishment. 

"  I  was  only  reflecting  if  the  lad  might  not  pos 
sibly  be  right  after  all.  When  we  come  to  think  of 
it  we  have  not  made  much  headway  in  the  last  dec 
ade,  notwithstanding  all  our  efforts  in  the  good 
cause.  He  is  a  most  extraordinary  youth.  House 
built  on  the  sand  !  No,  it  is  not  likely,  —  what  am 
I  saying  ?  likely  !  no  :  it  is  not  possible  that  the 
blessed  system  should  have  been  built  upon  fraud, 
and  yet  infidels  are  honest  men,  and  the  church  is 
divided  and  has  made  some  mistakes.  I  confess  it 
is  beyond  my  comprehension.  I  never  was  puz 
zled  so  in  my  life  before.  I  wonder  what  the  rascal, 
—  no:  what  am  I  saying?  he  is  not  a  rascal,  but 
a  fool  —  has  been  writing  to  her  all  this  time.  I 


RE  CONCILIA  TION.  22  3 

must  look  over  her  letters  ;  it  is  possible  that  he 
may  have  injured  her  faith." 

"  Depend  upon  it,  Mr.  Crisp,"  said  Pluffle  with  ill- 
concealed  anxiety,  "  he  has  done  all  in  his  power  to 
make  a  proselyte  of  her.  Investigate,  brother,  in 
vestigate  :  a  little  poison  is  often  fatal." 

"  The  poison  of  honesty,"  muttered  Mr.  Crisp, 
who  had  resumed  the  reflective  attitude,  hardly 
conscious  that  he  was  speaking. 

"  No,  I  mean  the  infidelity,"  explained  Pluffle  in  a 
lower  tone. 

"  I  tell  you  what  it  is,  Pluffle  ! "  cried  the  deacon 
with  a  sudden  acquisition  of  energy,  "what  the  boy 
says  is  worth  looking  into.  What  he  says  is  not 
mere  talk.  He  is  not  altogether  a  fool.  The  wisest 
of  us  are  liable  to  error.  I  shall  not  decide  in  a 
hurry.  We  may  exaggerate  the  importance  of  the 
C.  M.  P.  A.  I  never  dreamed  I  should  find  the 
honestest  man  I  ever  met  in  my  life,  not  only  out 
side  the  Independent  Spirit  Navigation  Denomina 
tion,  but  an  infidel  into  the  bargain.  We  really 
must  take  a  broader  view  of  things.  Lawson  does 
not  deny  religion  itself." 

Pluffle  sighed  dismally,  and  attempted  to  reply 
in  quivering  tones,  "Poor,  weak  human  reason,  —  " 

"Confound  your  poor,  weak  human  reason!"  thun 
dered  the  deacon,  firing  up  :  he  was  in  no  mood  for 
mere  palaver.  "  I  never  thought  you  had  any  to 
spare,  although  I  have  always  respected  your  faith 
fulness.  Here  is  pious  stupidity  on  one  hand,  and 
infidel  brains  on  the  other.  I  find  it  hard  to  choose 
between  you." 


224  RECONCILIA  TION. 

As  Crisp  was  not  entirely  void  of  insight  into 
human  nature,  especially  into  those  characteris 
tics  which  he  shared  in  common  with  his  pas 
tor,  the  latter's  penchant  for  his  daughter  had  not 
escaped  his  observation.  He  was  at  once  vexed 
and  irritated,  disappointed  and  grieved,  by  Mal 
colm's  avowal  of  his  radicalism ;  and  he  required  a 
more  effectual  palliative  than  the  sops  of  scrip 
ture  which  Pluffle  offered  to  his  inflamed  spirit. 
He  also  felt  humbled  in  the  sight  of  his  minis 
ter,  as  he  had  always  declared  his  confidence  in 
the  discrimination  of  the  lad.  Add  to  this  the 
fact  that  he  really  had  at  bottom  a  certain  regard 
for  "  poor  human  reason,"  which  the  logic  of  his 
creed  had  taught  him  to  repress,  if  not  to  extin 
guish  entirely.  Malcolm's  letter  had  roused  it  into 
action  ;  and  naturally,  like  a  person  whose  temper 
is  not  improved  by  being  disturbed  during  a  sound 
sleep,  he  visited  his  ire  on  the  first  person  who  hap 
pened  to  be  in  the  way.  The  high  moral  tone  of 
the  letter  instantly  kindled  in  him  the  conviction 
that  man  was  not  so  bad  as  he  was  in  the  habit 
of  calling  him,  and  in  the  fitful  light  of  this  con 
viction  he  caught  a  glimpse  of  his  own  worldliness, 
and  especially  of  PlufHe's.  Then  his  own  love  for 
the  boy,  and  the  prospect  of  another  quarrel  with 
Jennie,  were  not  without  influence  upon  him.  He 
was,  in  short,  fairly  bewildered,  —  nay,  furiously  so, 
and  he  spoke  out  of  the  fullness  of  his  bewilder 
ment.  Pluffie  was  quite  overwhelmed  by  the  above 
outbreak  of  his  beloved  friend.  He  nearly  lost 
his  wits.  However,  he  soon  gathered  courage, 


RECONCILIA  TION.  22$ 

and  was  about  to  make  a  forcible  reply,  when  it 
occurred  to  him  that  it  might  be  more  politic  to 
notice  the  affront  in  a  quiet  way.  Accordingly  he 
arose  with  an  injured  air,  and,  bidding  his  dear 
brother  in  the  Lord  a  cold  good-morning,  he  left 
the  room  and  the  house  and  the  stage  of  this  story 
forever.  If  the  reader  has  any  desire  to  see  him 
again,  he  will  be  under  the  mournful  necessity  of 
going  to  a  prayer-meeting  in  the  good  city  of  Brag- 
ville. 

The  deacon  was  so  absorbed  by  his  own  feelings 
that  he  scarcely  noticed  the  departure  of  Pluffle. 
But  soon  realizing  the  stillness  of  the  room,  his 
conscience  at  once  smote  him  for  having  cast  a 
slur  on  the  sacred  cloth.  Yet  he  managed  to  ap 
pease  it  by  the  words,  "  I  guess  it  won't  hurt  him 
much.  He'll  get  over  it  in  a  few  days.  Had  it  not 
been  for  my  aid  he  would  never  have  been  a  D.D." 
His  moral  sense  now  being  in  an  unusually  active 
state,  this  ignoble  thought  brought  up  his  own  and 
Pluffle's  worldliness  again,  and  he  involuntarily  com 
pared  the  latter  with  Malcolm,  whose  integrity  and 
spirited  independence  drew  from  him,  in  defiance 
of  his  theological  prejudices,  an  exclamation  of  un 
qualified  admiration.  In  this  mood  he  lifted  up  the 
letter  again,  and  as  he  re-read  it  with  increased 
attention  his  anger  fled,  and  the  tears  actually  came 
into  his  eyes.  His  heart  warmed  still  more  toward 
the  boy  who  had  saved  his  life  at  the  imminent  peril 
of  his  own,  even  while  his  creed  exhorted  him  to 
beware  of  the  Fiend  of  radicalism.  The  tempest 
of  his  feelings  at  last  broke  loose  in  prayer,  and  he 
15 


226  RECONCILIA  TION. 

prayed  audibly  and  fervently  that  light  might  be 
given  him  to  guide  him  aright  in  this  most  impor 
tant  matter.  But,  alas  !  To  many  the  Almighty  \s> 
an  overshadowing,  an  omnious  gloom,  not  an  ever- 
radiant  luminousness,  full  of  cheerful  sympathy. 
Yet  the  two  ideas  are  necessary,  and  the  more  per 
fect  capacity  will  contain  both  properly  balanced, 
the  one  against  the  other.  Mystery  is  a  zest  to 
the  best  Intelligence. 

It  is  reserved  for  religion  to  see  God  face  to  face. 
Theology,  if  it  cannot  correctly  be  said  to  see  God 
back  to  back,  at  best  catches  a  scanty  glimpse  of 
his  shoulders. 

How  many  indeed  exist  yet  but  half  alive,  bear- 
like  throughout  the  winter  of  their  idle  discon 
tent,  in  the  hollowness  of  a  narrow  convention 
ality,  or  of  pedantry  and  other  artificiality,  until 
the  gleams,  or  it  may  be  the  steady  glow  of 
some  sun-like  mind,  rouses  them  into  charitable 
activity  of  some  kind  !  Poor  Crisp !  if  thou  hadst 
even  begun  to  appreciate  the  sublimity  of  the  man 
whom  thy  superstition  has  dubbed  Omnipotence, 
it  had  been  much  better  with  thee  long  ere  now. 
Know  that  thou  canst  not  simultaneously  wor 
ship  God  and  Mammon  without  growing  in  ear 
as  much  as  in  grace  and  respectability.  Rich, 
active,  but  stupid  and  blind,  art  thou,  even  as  was 
the  fabled  king  of  antiquity  who  abused  the  god- 
sent  gifts  of  thrift  and  enterprise  ;  and  all  the  inci 
dental  charities  that  an  unwelcome  fate  extorts  from 
thy  heart  avail  thee  but  little.  How  much  better 
would  it  have  been,  hadst  thou  given  a  small  por- 


RECONCILIA  TION.  22/ 

tion  of  the  great  energy  which  was  devoted  to 
the  protection  of  the  miracles  of  the  past,  and  to 
the  filling  of  thy  purse,  to  the  grander  miracle  of 
thine  own  being,  so  that  thou  couldst  profit  by  the 
hour  that  is,  the  Eternity  that  is  daily  proffering 
itself  to  thee.  But  even  thou  hast  not  lived  in  vain 
for  thy  kind.  Thy  ant-like  spirit  has  been  productive 
of  much  good,  notwithstanding  its  auricular  adorn 
ment,  in  that  thou  hast  helped  build  in  the  western 
wilds  cities  of  many  minarets,  scored  the  continents 
with  railroads  as  if  with  an  iron  pencil,  stitched 
them  together  with  magnetic  wire,  and  studded  the 
seas  with  golden  prows  and  snow-white  sails.  Yet 
of  what  good  all  these  marvellous  works  of  skill, 
if  nobility  and  integrity  of  purpose  keep  not  pace 
with  their  construction  and  government  ?  For  a 
verity,  if  these  elements  be  wanting,  they  only 
add  to  the  weakness  of  the  weak,  to  the  evil  of 
the  evil,  to  the  diffusion  of  that  whose  safety  is  in 
limitation  to  the  spot  of  ground  that  has  given  it 
birth.  Happy  is  he  who  escapes  the  taint  that  is 
in  the  moral  atmosphere  of  the  times.  Every  social 
commotion  wafts  it  into  our  homes,  and  there  is  no 
end  to  the  tribulation  it  prepares  for  us.  We  can 
almost  see  it  gather  and  grow  like  the  cholera 
cloud,  hovering  gloomily  over  our  monuments  and 
domes,  so  that  the  danger  of  contagion  is  greater  in 
the  so-called  sanctuary  than  within  our  own  doors. 
It  would  seem  that  the  Almighty  intended  from  the 
beginning  to  grow  many  a  worthless  crop  of  animal 
life  that  he  might  plow  it  under  for  the  sake  of 
the  harvest  that  is  to  come.  It  is  a  matter  well 


228  RE  CONCILIA  TIO  .V. 

worthy  of  note  that  so  much  more  attention  should 
be  given  by  the  present  generation  to  the  increase 
of  luxury,  to  the  mere  titillation  of  the  body,  and  to 
its  meretricious  adornment,  than  to  that  which  we 
all,  radical  and  conservative,  Christian  and  Anti- 
christian,  openly  acknowledge  to  be  our  nobler 
part,  —  namely,  the  mind. 


II. 

DEACON   CRISP   AND   HIS   RESOLUTION. 

r  I  ^HE  deacon  was  in  a  dilemma.  For  the  first 
•i  time  in  his  life  a  faint  sense  of  the  insuffi 
ciency  of  his  vast  possessions  to  satisfy  all  wants 
came  over  him.  He  fancied  at  first  that  Mal 
colm  was  slightly  insane,  and  naturally  trembled  at 
the  thought  of  giving  his  daughter  to  him  on  that 
account,  apart  from  any  theological  considerations. 
But  the  honesty  shown  by  the  youth  was  something 
that  he  could  not  reconcile  with  the  impression  that 
he  was  a  "little  out,"  as  he  expressed  it.  His  moral 
sense  strongly  inclined  him  to  forget  creed  and  take 
him  to  his  hearth  again.  Yet  how  could  he  do 
so  in  justice  to  his  sacred  convictions  ?  In  point 
of  fact,  he  was  situated  like  Malcolm  himself,  when 
unworthy  considerations  sought  to  turn  the  latter 
from  the  straight  way.  The  real  difference  between 
their  respective  positions  was  that  Malcolm's  scru 
ples  were  founded  on  regard  for  what  he  knew  to  be 
the  truth,  while  the  Deacon's  were  founded  upon  the 
dictates  of  mere  habit  and  superstition. 

"  To  give  him  my  daughter,"  said  the  deacon  to 
himself,  "is  to  confess  that  I  have  misspent  my 
life  in  so  far  as  I  have  sought  to  sustain  certain 
doctrines,  —  to  proclaim  to  the  world  that  the 
Continental  Miracle  Protection  Association  is  the 

(229) 


230  RECONCILIA  TION. 

epitome  of  all  foolishness.  Paradox  of  paradoxes,  an 
honest  scoffer,  a  faithful  unbeliever !  The  thought 
drives  me  wild."  Here  he  had  to  clench  his  fist 
and  cry,  "  But  I  shall  not  yield  to  the  weakness  of 
the  moment.  It  grieves  me  to  the  heart,  not  only 
to  disappoint  my  child,  but  to  send  him  adrift ;  for  I 
began  to  look  upon  him  as  my  own  son.  Yet  if 
thy  right  eye  offend  thee,  pluck  it  out  and  cast  it 
from  thee  ;  for  better  it  should  perish,  than  that 
thy  whole  body  should  be  cast  into  hell.  But  has 
he  really  offended  me  or  Heaven  to  that  extent, 
or  is  it  my  doctrines  that  have  offended  us  all  ? 
Alas  !  alas !  I  am  very  weak,  and  all  is  vanity  and 
vexation  of  spirit.  The  Roaring  Lion  has  prevailed 
against  him,  and  stolen  him  from  the  fold.  But  then 
he  is  honest,  and  the  pleasures  of  the  world  seem  to 
have  no  attraction  for  him  ;  for  he  throws  them 
back  to  me  as  if  they  were  handfuls  of  orange-peel. 
There  surely  is  something  in  him." 

But  Mr.  Crisp's  principal  devil,  Dr.  Pluffle,  had 
been  cast  out,  and  his  natural  piety  rose  above  de 
basing  superstition.  Shortly  after  Pluffle  went  he 
arose  with  a  weary  air,  and  he  sought  the  apartment 
of  his  daughter  with  unsteady  steps,  for  the  deacon, 
owing  to  his  intense  application  to  business,  had 
been  somewhat  out  of  health  of  late  years.  He 
found  Jennie  reading  quietly,  all  traces  of  her  late 
emotion  having  disappeared  ;  and  she  arose  with  a 
smile  to  receive  him.  But  he  was  now  so  filled  with 
the  sense  of  his  dignity  as  a  guardian  of  the  Faith, 
that  he  could  only  frown. 

"  I  am  here,"  he  began,  in  severe  tones,  "to  talk  to 


RECONCILIA  TION.  2  3 1 

you  about  Malcolm.  Oh,  Jennie,  when  did  this 
fatal  change  take  place  in  his  religious  sentiments  ?  " 

"  But  a  few  days  ago.  I  could  not  bear  to  tell 
you.  My  heart  was  crushed  at  the  thought  of  your 
grief.  But  do  not  misjudge  him,  father ;  he  is 
honor  and  justice  both." 

"  But,  my  dear  child,  he  is  a  heretic  ;  just  con 
sider,  —  a  heretic  open  and  defiant ;  an  apostate  to 
the  Church  ;  a  rejector  of  Him  crucified  ;  and  yet 
you,  my  daughter,  step  out  of  the  inner  temple  to 
become  the  prey  of  the  Christless.  God  have  mercy 
upon  us  !  I  pitied  a  frozen  viper  and  thawed  it  out 
on  my  own  hearth-stone.  Behold  what  has  hap 
pened  ! " 

"  But,  father,  dear,  dear  father,"  she  cried,  as  if 
possessed  by  a  new  spirit,  "  that  is  palpably  un 
true  ;  Malcolm  is  the  saviour  of  your  life,  not  you 
of  his,  and  never  before  has  he  had  more  of  God 
than  now.  The  opposite  of  the  viper,  it  is  he  that 
strives  to  warm  yotfSnto  new  life  ;  yes,  you,  O  my 
father,  who  have  allowed  such  as  Bungle  and  PlufHe 
to  freeze  you  unto  blindness !  Malcolm  a  viper  ? 
No :  he  is  the  sun,  and  those  men  are  the  vipers." 

"  You  are  mad,  child,  quite  mad,"  gasped  the  dea 
con,  with  more  doubt  as  to  the  truthfulness  of  his 
position.  "  Your  lover  is  the  victim  of  pride  and 
sophistry,  and  you  are  naturally  the  echo  of  his 
thought." 

"  He  is  not  'the  victim  of  pride  and  sophistry,'  but 
he  is  a  seer  of  the  simple  Truth.  And  what  though  I 
do  echo  his  thought,  is  it  not  greater  than  mine  and 
stronger  than  the  world  ?  I  love  him  because  he  is 


.232 


RECONCILIA  TION. 


.true  to  himself ;  and  if  this  be  madness,  why,  mad 
ness  is  the  blessing  of  God." 

" '  True  to  himself,'  that  is  a  very  vague  expres 
sion.  '  True  to  the  Master,'  is  the  right  word." 

"Yet  the  prodigal,  —  did  he  not  come  to  himself 
before  he  returned  to  Forgiveness  ?  " 

"  True,  my  child,  true  ;  but  that  is  a  mere  idiom, 
meaning  the  return  of  thought  to  a  thoughtless 
person." 

"  Thought,  then,  must  be  but  a  small  matter  to 
you,  father.  To  Malcolm  it  is  everything  :  the  surg 
ing  sea  and  the  green  earth  ;  the  sun  and  the  stars  ; 
even  God  himself;  and  not  only  me,  but  all  that  is 
yours  and  mine  he  spurns  rather  than  be  untrue  to 
it.  Can  you  gather  grapes  of  thorns  or  figs  of 
thistles,  or  receive  from  the  darkness  the  crown  of 
light  ?  Malcolm  has  given  me  new  hope,  new  life, 
and  shall  I  at  your  command  give  it  up  again  ?  No. 
He  is  mine  and  I  am  his,  and  the  Church  herself 
shall  perish  before  we  are  torn  apart." 

"  O  Jennie,  my  only  child,"  he  replied,  plaintively, 
closing  his  eyes  as  if  he  had  tired  them  looking  out 
into  the  night,  "  I  do  not  understand  it.  I  do  not 
understand  it.  You  are  both  Christless,  yet  you 
are  not  Godless  ;  you  are  both  lovers  of  Truth,  yet 
given  up  to  Heresy  ;  both  the  most  faithful  of  chil 
dren,  yet  rank  infidels.  Oh,  take  the  dust  from  out 
of  my  eyes.  What  fatal  spell  baffles  my  tongue  and 
cramps  my  intellect  to  the  mockery  of  all  speech  ?  " 

"  Think  again  father,  and  again,"  she  cried,  •'  with 
the  aspect  of  a  Judith  in  the  tent  of  Holofernes,  sabre 
in  hand.  It  is  very  simple,  oh,  so  simple,  a  child  is 


RECONCILIA  TION. 


233 


equal  to  it.  Infidelity  is  faithlessness  ;  and  if  you 
can  show  me  aught  that  he  is  faithless  to,  unless  to 
faithlessness  itself,  I  will  rank  him  with  the  plague, 
and  call  him  King  of  Evil." 

"  Enough,  enough,  you  have  said  enough  !  Every 
word  is  a  sharp  sword.  But  you  must  winnow  your 
grain  of  Truth  of  bushels  of  chaff.  If  I  depart  from 
the  letter  of  revelation,  which  ages  and  ages  of 
philanthropy  have  sanctified  as  the  holy  of  holies 
in  the  Temple  of  Truth,  an  abiding  place  of  God, 
whither  shall  I  flee  for  refuge  ?  Endless  doubt  and 
tribulation  storm  in  upon  me,  and  send  me  forth 
like  King  David  in  the  night  to  mourn  the  rebellion 
of  my  blood.  Alas  !  to  think  that  I,  in  my  old  age, 
should  be  torn  from  my  kingdom  of  the  Cross  and 
be  swept  away  by  a  tide  of  infidelity,  pouring  from 
the  breast  of  my  only  child.  Help  me,  O  Christ,  to 
be  true  to  thee  in  this  hour  of  peril,  and  I  shall  not 
sink  as  one  of  little  faith.  Jennie,  you  are  wrong, 
you  must  be  wrong  ;  the  Bible  cannot  lie." 

"  But  PlufHe  can  —  and  the  rest.  Would  to  heaven 
they  were  all  swamped  by  the  same  infidelity !  See 
to  it,  father,  and  guard  well  your  eyes.  The  dust  of 
superstition  is  worse  than  that  of  atheism,  and  the 
service  of  Mammon  is  the  leprosy  of  the  Christian 
as  well  as  of  the  Jew.  As  Malcolm  has  helped  me, 
so  may  he  help  you." 

"  Give  me  time,  time,  and  I  will  penetrate  this 
mystery.  Now  I  am  tired,  quite  tired  ;  a  glass  of 
wine,  child." 

Here  the  spirit  of  Judith  vanished,  and  Jennie 
was  herself  again,  —  all  tenderness, —  and  she  ran  to 


234 


RECONCILIA  TION. 


serve  the  old  man.  But,  in  another  moment,  she, 
too,  experienced  reaction,  and  she  sank  exhausted 
on  a  chair.  Then  it  was  that  her  father  felt  his 
heart  change,  and  he  approached  her  full  of  sym 
pathy.  Almost  forgetful  of  his  Faith,  he  promised  to 
recall  her  lover.  But  scarce  had  he  done  it,  when  he 
regretted  his  haste  ;  for  he  fancied  still  a  resemblance 
between  himself  and  Peter,  when  he  denied  his 
Master  before  the  judges  of  Israel.  Yet  he  wrote 
to  Malcolm  to  come  without  delay,  as  his  heresy 
was  overlooked  in  part,  on  account  of  his  integrity, 
which  permitted  the  deacon  to  hope  that  there  still 
remained  a  chance  of  salvation.  The  young  man 
wondered  a  moment,  and  then  went  to  bid  Shaft 
good-by. 


III. 


ADIEU. 

"Grau,  theurer  Freund,  ist  alle  Theorie, 
Und  grun  des  Lebens  goldner  Baum." 

—  Paust. 

MR.  SHAFT  was  a  constant  mystery  to  Mal 
colm.  That  gentleman,  radical  as  he  was, 
could  preach  in  many  pulpits,  and  that  without 
sacrifice  of  self-respect.  His  was  the  rare  genius 
of  agreement,  and  where  most  people  saw  chaos 
and  confusion,  he  perceived  a  measure  of  light 
and  order.  Endowed  with  singular  energy  and 
fixity  of  purpose,  he  seemed  to  occupy  a  high 
seat  in  the  house  of  knowledge,  whence  he  se 
renely  surveyed  the  spectacle  below.  Yet  he  was 
not  without  the  impulse  of  a  passionate  nature. 
He  could  asseverate  with  startling  emphasis  that 
he  was  quite  right,  and  that  all  others  were  only 
measurably  so,  and  if  the  Universalist  had  not  al 
ready  killed  the  Devil,  he  would  certainly,  with  fell 
intent,  have  thrown  not  merely  an  inkstand,  but  him 
self,  at  his  head.  He  was  never  the  same  to  Mal 
colm  since  the  latter's  obvious  but  temporary  aber 
ration,  and  he  did  not  omit  to  speak  his  mind  on  the 
subject.  But  the  contrition  of  the  youth  softened 
him  somewhat,  and  he  began  to  forget  the  untoward 
circumstance.  "  Do  not,  Malcolm,"  he  said,  "  flatter 

(235) 


236  RECONCILIA  TION. 

yourself  that  you  can  ever  be  much  after  what  has 
taken  place.  You  are  no  longer  a  fit  temple  for  the 
Spirit's  permanent  abode :  the  best  you  can  now  do 
is  to  prepare  for  his  chance  sojourn." 

"  But  work  will  work  miracles  with  the  worst," 
cried  Malcolm,  with  an  anxious  but  confident  look. 
"  It  is  true  that  I  turned  my  back  to  the  sun,  and 
began  to  flirt  with  the  moon  ;  but  realizing  my  folly, 
I  return  to  the  light.  She  welcomes  me  as  if  I  had 
always  been  true  to  her." 

"  You  are  in  luck,  surely.  A  fortunate  fluke  in 
most  games  will  cheat  skill  himself  and  pocket  the 
stakes.  But  it  is  otherwise  with  the  game  of  spirit : 
there  the  reward  never  exceeds  the  merit.  Affirm 
and  you  will  be  affirmed.  Deny  and  you  will  be  de 
nied.  Do  you  think  the  Eternal  Yes,  as  represented 
by  Jesus,  could  ever  have  been  uttered  if  it  had  not 
been  lived  ?  In  it  behold  the  grand  affirmation  of 
nineteen  centuries.  Goethe  knew  that  he  could  not 
write  better  than  he  himself  was.  Hence  the  neg 
ative  character  of  "  Faust,"  which  is  but  a  fit  symbol 
of  the  present  time.  Nothing  but  the  realization  of 
the  weakness  of  my  own  character  prevents  me  from 
aspiring  to  the  dignity  of  the  true  preacher  who 
is  really  a  prophet,  a  divine  person  who  comes  to 
give  us  new  form  and  life.  Thus  far  the  pages  of 
history  are  full  of  the  doings  of  One.  And  the 
so-called  ministers  of  His  word  are  little  more 
than  the  sextons  of  His  church.  In  spite  of  my 
self,  being  far  inferior  to  Him,  I  am  drawn  into 
the  maelstrom  of  his  influence,  so  strongly  indeed, 
that  I  belong  to  that  church  whose  Realized- Ideal, 


RECONCILIA  TION. 


237 


until   it    is    superseded    by   a   better,    shall    remain 
supreme." 

"  But  do  you  not  thereby  sacrifice  your  individu 
ality  ? " 

"  Yes,  in  the  worst  sense  of  the  word.  After  all, 
personality  is  not  individuality.  I  exchange  the 
one  for  the  other.  Individuality,  however  strikingly 
characteristic  of  the  person,  is  only  that  whereby 
he  is  distinguished  from  others.  Jesus  and  Judas, 
as  individuals,  are  alike  distinguished,  the  former 
for  goodness,  and  the  latter  for  badness  ;  but  as 
persons,  Jesus  partakes  of  Divinity,  while  Judas  is 
hardly  worthy  of  the  name  of  person.  To  me,  there 
fore,  individuality  is  the  direct  negation  of  the  Uni 
versal,  the  genius  of  disagreement,  the  Darkness, 
which,  despite  his  seeming  terribleness,  is  con 
demned  to  flourish  but  an  impotent  sword  in  the 
face  of  all-conquering  Light." 

"  Impotent !  that  is  just  what  I  cannot  believe. 
All  the  Philosophy  in  the  world  cannot  keep  me 
from  seeing  that  palpable  hurt,  Positive  Evil,  actu 
ally  exists.  Look  at  his  ravages  in  my  own  heart. 
And  so  obvious  is  the  destruction  which  attends 
every  stroke  of  his  death-sword  that  I  wonder  why 
clergymen  can  talk  so  coolly  about  it.  The  trials 
of  men  are  not  the  angels  of  God.  Good  Heavens  ! 
why  can't  people  see  that  the  Father  of  Lies  is  sim 
ply  the  Father  of  Fools,  and  have  done  with  him  ? 
This  miserable,  self-delusive,  optimistic  soothing  is 
little  better  than  snake-charming.  It  has  done  me 
so  much  harm  that  I  often  feel  like  asking  God  to 
make  me  a  fiery  serpent,  and  cast  me  hissing  into 


238  RECONCILIA  TION. 

the  midst  of  his  enemies.  I  hate  your  splendid 
speaking  and  theological  refinements  while  so  much 
remains  to  be  done  for  the  moral  life  of  the  country. 
Why  regale  fraudulent  traders  and  dishonest  politi 
cians  with  the  sweets  of  optimism  in  the  presence 
of  a  supremely  just  God?" 

"  Keep  your  temper,  Malcolm,  and  let  the  dead 
bury  their  dead  as  they  best  can.  Let  us  continue 
with  the  intellectual  or  rather  ideal  aspect  of  things, 
which  we  all  have  in  common.  I  was  about  to  say," 
—  and  Mr.  Shaft  looked  as  if  he  rejoiced  in  his 
equanimity,  while  Malcolm  subsided  at  once,  —  "it 
is  wrong  even  to  name  or  denominate  ourselves, 
as  apart  from  our  fellow-men.  Sectarianism  is  the 
worst  feature  of  the  times." 

"  But  are  we  not  all  aiming  at  the  broadest  plat 
forms  ? " 

"Yes  ;  but  most  indirectly,  and  with  only  half  a 
heart.  Instead  of  acting  on  the  principle  of  essen 
tial  unity,  —  namely,  that  we  are  really  one  in  hon 
est  motive  and  desire  of  betterment,  —  we  are  too 
apt  to  rest  on  the  assumption  that  those  persons  who 
will  not  share  our  belief  seek  only  their  own  Good  at 
the  expense  of  their  fellow-men.  But  I  am  strong 
in  the  faith  that  we  all  love  the  Good,  each  after  his 
own  fashion,  according  to  the  extent  of  his  Univer 
sal  Light.  And  as  the  Good  is  only  conceivable  in 
and  by  the  Person,  how  can  we  avoid  striving  to  re 
alize  Him  in  ourselves  ;  and  indeed,  from  the  intel 
lectual  point  of  view,  I  see  nothing  to  retard  that 
realization  but  want  of  unanimity  in  the  acknowl 
edgment  of  the  Ideal  State." 


RECONCILIA  TION. 


239 


"  Acknowledgment  of  the  Ideal  State  ?  " 

"  Yes,  I  mean  what  I  say.  That  want  of  unanim 
ity  is  represented  by  isms,  and  all  other  attempts 
at  invidious  distinctions  and  separate  or  individual 
existence.  For  my  part,  as  I  said  before,  I  ignore 
them  entirely,  and  recognizing  the  unity  subsisting 
beneath  all  outward  things,  I  aspire  to  the  life  of  the 
Spirit,  and  that  life  is  best  expressed,  if  we  speak 
about  it  at  all,  in  the  most  correct  language.  How 
absurd  it  is  to  call  the  Good  or  the  God  that  is  in 
us  individual ;  how  impious  and  contradictory  the 
term  a  holy  or  complete  individual ! " 

"  I  hardly  understand  you." 

"  What !  Don't  you  see  that  a  man  is  only  Divine 
in  so  far  as  he,  rising  above  and  descending  below 
all  separate  existence,  obtains  the  unity  so  strongly 
felt  by  Jesus  in  the  holiest  of  his  prayers.  I  will  set 
no  bounds  to  my  soul,  however  marked  the  distinc 
tion  which  places  me  above  or  below  the  level  of  my 
race,  but  rather  pour  myself  forth  in  sympathy  with 
all  persons,  however  great  or  small  their  so-called 
individualities.  For  my  limited  or  individual  na 
ture,  moral  and  intellectual,  is  neither  more  nor  less 
than  the  old  Adam,  and  the  sooner  I  exchange  him 
for  the  new  the  better." 

"  But  do  you  not  contract  yourself  in  thus  distin 
guishing  yourself  by  the  peculiar  use  of  words  ? " 

"  Not  i  eally.  For  in  view  of  things  as  they  are, 
it  makes  but  little  difference  how  we  illustrate  our 
theme,  provided  that  we  do  it  well.  Yet,  as  a  would- 
be-representative  of  the  Golden  Age,  I  prefer,  even 
at  the  risk  of  isolation,  to  use  the  most  correct  Ian- 


240 


RECONCILIA  TION. 


guage  that  I  can  find.  Due  appreciation  of  person 
ality,  in  the  moral  sense  particularly,  is  the  redemp 
tion  of  the  race.  It  is  that  which  points  to  the 
Infinite  lying  below  the  microscope,  and  to  that 
which  transcends  the  utmost  range  of  the  telescope. 
It  is  that  which  fills  me  with  the  majesty  of  the 
universe,  and  makes  me  sink  back  from  attempting 
to  penetrate  its  mysteries,  quite  baffled  by  the  inef 
fable  sanctity  of  personal  existence.  Not  that  I 
disdain  the  aids  of  Science,  but  so  far  as  I  am 
concerned  he  has  been  but  little  more  than  a  mock 
ing  Mephistophiles.  He  has  taken  more  than  he  has 
given.  There,"  cried  Mr.  Shaft,  and  he  lifted  up 
Shakespeare's  Tempest,  "  in  that  play  of  the  Spirit 
behold  more  than  can  be  threshed  from  twenty 
stacks  of  doctrinal  works,  for  it  contains  the  only 
true  scheme  of  salvation.  How  magnificently  hope 
ful  the  soul  of  Shakespeare  !  What  are  the  dramatis 
persona  of  this  winged  thing,  but  the  various  as 
pects  of  man's  being  in  this  world  ?  In  the  banish 
ment  of  Prospero,  I  see  the  alleged  lapse  of  the  soul 
from  her  original  blessedness,  and  his  banishment 
is  parallel  to  the  confinement  of  Ariel.  The  former 
is  Wisdom  personified,  and  the  latter  is  Genius,  the 
most  subtle  influence  of  the  soul.  Both  inherit  the 
island,  which  is  but  a  fit  symbol  of  the  earth  as  it  is 
now  inhabited.  Sycorax  is  Superstition,  ever  a  blue- 
eyed  sorceress,  whose  ministers,  prevailing  against 
Genius,  imprison  him  in  the  cloven  pine.  Can't 
you  hear  him  moan  in  the  wooden  hollowness  of  the 
scholastics  ?  Wisdom  alone  is  equal  to  his  release, 
and,  being  released,  he  must  serve  him  as  long  as  he 


RECONCILIA  TION. 


241 


requires.  For  him  he  flames  amazement,  tells  no 
lies,  rides  on  the  sharp  wind  of  the  north,  does  him 
service  in  the  veins  of  the  frozen  earth,  being  in 
short  a  veritable  Moses'  rod.  How  infinitely  suc 
cessful  the  joint  action  of  Prospero  and  Ariel !  The 
calamity  of  shipwreck,  like  all  evil,  is  only  in  appear 
ances,  for  all  the  passengers  and  crew  are  saved. 
The  virtuous  man  and  woman,  as  represented  by 
Ferdinando  and  Miranda,  are  now  allowed  to  meet, 
and  after  —  even  under  the  present  most  favorable 
circumstances  —  being  made  to  pass  the  ordeal  of 
work  and  temptation,  receive  the  blessing  of  the 
Gods.  Dignity,  Plenty,  Peace,  Hope  are  there  to 
consecrate  the  holiest  of  unions.  And  the  reconcil 
iation  of  Prospero  to  his  enemies  follows  as  the  nat 
ural  end  to  this  Divine  Comedy ;  for  this  means  the 
restoration  of  the  tried  soul  to  her  former  power  and 
glory.  Even  Caliban,*  who  represents  the  inferior 

*  Mr.  Shaft  has,  at  least  in  regard  to  this  character,  as 
much  Truth  on  his  side  as  that  aspiring  evolutionist  who  has 
just  written  a  remarkable  book,  intimating  that  Caliban  is  the 
missing  link  needed  to  complete  Darwin's  theory  of  man's 
progressive  development  from  —  I  can't  say  what  exactly, 
but,  depend  upon  it,  it  is  as  near  nothing  as  you  can  possi 
bly  get.  However,  the  learned  author  has  builded  better  than 
he  knew.  Caliban  does  connect  man  with  worse  than  the  ape, 
but  as  much  now  perhaps  as  ever ;  and  there  is  no  link  miss 
ing  in  the  chain  of  internal  evidence  to  this  effect.  Coleridge 
defines  Genius  "as  originality  in  intellectual  construction, 
the  moral  accompaniment  and  actuating  principle  of  which 
consists,  perhaps,  in  the  carrying  on  of  the  freshness  and 
feelings  of  childhood  into  the  powers  of  manhood.""  This 
is  probably  why  so  many  great  geniuses  —  great  even  as 
Goethe,  from  whom  the  modern  idea  of  evolution  seems  to 


242 


RECONCILIA  TION. 


man,  or  the  Old  Adam,  cannot  avoid  coming  to  him 
self  after  he  realizes  the  futility  of  rebellion  against 
the  best  of  masters.  Mark  the  art  of  Shakespeare 
in  taking  him  away  from  awakened  purity  in  that 
he  provides  him  with  a  suitable  god  in  a  drunken 
butler." 

"  But  is  he  not  indispensable  as  the  earth  herself?" 

"  True.     But  having  brought  the  wood  and  lit  his 

master's  fire,  let  him  go  where  he  belongs.     Genius 

and  Wisdom  can  now  do  without  his  ministrations." 

"  And  is  Ariel  nothing  more  than  Genius  ? " 

"  Yes.     He  takes  the  part  of  Conscience,  who  is 

always  a  harpy  to  the  bad,  and  thus  shows  the  power 

of  personality  even  in  such  as  Caliban,  to  whom  he 

gives  the  lie.     Witness  also  his  speech  to  the  three 

men  of  sin.     He  compels    Nature   to   rise   in   her 

might,  and  belch  forth  indignation  at  their  crimes, 

and  makes  the  ghost  of  their  murdered  Virtue  drive 

them  to  sorrow  and  repentance." 

"  But  you  forget  Gonzalo.  Who  is  he  ? " 
"  The  blind  idealistic  individualist  who  is  always 
like  a  shipwrecked  courtier  on  a  desert  island.  He 
would,  with  such  perfection,  govern  as  to  excel  the 
golden  age  itself,  yet  cannot,  for  the  life  of  him,  do 
anything  but  talk  about  it.  He  stays  content  even 
with  his  materialistic  associates,  guarding  his  sleep 
ing  king,  the  type  of  weak  inactivity." 

"  But  is  such  an  idealist  really  unpractical  ? " 
"  That  depends  on  the  character  of  his  individual- 
have  emanated  —  are  sometimes  tempted  to  forget  the  pres 
ence  of  the  Muse,  for  the  sake  of  making  dirt-pies  with  the 
lower  classes  of  child-like  persons. 


RECONCILIA  TION.  243 

ism.  In  so  far  as  he  is  a  genuine,  a  truly  universal 
man,  he  exhibits  in  himself  the  golden  possibilities 
of  the  future,  and  is  therefore  the  most  practical  man 
alive.  Yet,  the  trouble  with  him  is  that  he  allows 
the  speech  to  stand  for  the  deed.  He  forgets  that 
the  moral  act  is  the  first  step  towards  the  realization 
of  the  ideal  state,  which  is  in  reality  the  millennium, 
the  acknowledged  golden  age  of  Christianity.  But 
beware  of  false  prophets.  That  vision  of  the  poet 
will  never  be  realized  until,  through  the  co-operation 
of  Prospero  and  Ariel,  the  Ferdinando  and  Miranda 
are  produced,  and,  in  the  absence  of  Caliban,  brought 
together.  How  fortunate  that  Sycorax  is  a  blue-eyed 
hag !  There  seems  to  be  everything  in  the  simple, 
yet  significant  fact,  that  Mary,  the  purest  of  women, 
should  still  be  worshiped  as  the  Mother  of  God." 

"  There  is  more  in  Shakespeare  than  I  thought 
there  was.  How  strange  if  he  should  prove  to  be 
the  coming  man  in  whom  we  are  all  to  be  made 
alive ! " 

"  Do  not  be  irreverent." 

"  Pardon  me.  Please  continue.  Why  should  Pros 
pero  resign  his  books,  and  set  his  Ariel  free  ? " 

"  That  is  the  most  beautiful  part  of  it  all.  The 
Prosperity  of  this  golden  hour  no  longer  requires 
their  aid.  Wisdom  sees  his  task  accomplished  in 
the  blissful  union  of  his  children,  with  whom  he  is  in 
perfect  sympathy.  For,  as  you  see,  each  personifi 
cation  in  the  fable  represents  an  acknowledged  aspect 
of  the  Whole  Soul  or  the  Complete  Person  in  whom 
Ariel  is  finally  set  free.  Thus  Individuality  perishes 
of  its  own  accord,  and  we  find,  in  short,  that  we  all  are 


244 


RECONCILIA  TION. 


'  Tempests  '  in  a  greater  or  less  degree,  each  one  of 
us  having  within,  as  personified  without,  our  false 
and  true  friends,  exilers,  Calibans,  quarrels,  reconcil 
iations,  Ferdinand  and  Miranda,  and  so  forth,  all 
more  or  less  fortunate  in  their  complex  activities. 
Let  us,  then,  on  the  approach  of  that  calm  when 
we  no  longer  possess  the  art  to  enchant  and  the 
spirit  to  enforce,  be  able  to  say  that  we,  too,  like 
the  Highest  Wisdom,  have  given  our  fullness  to 
those  whom  we  leave  behind  us.  And  further 
more,  let  the  prayer  wherein  we,  like  Prospero, 
find  relief,  be  that  conviction  of  Divine  Unity, 
that  realized  aspiration  which  is  none  other  than 
Freedom  herself.  What  is  all  earthly  existence 
but  the  pastime  of  the  Spirit !  It  fades  and  dissolves 
with  the  beholder's  eye,  yet  reappears  with  all  origi 
nal  splendor  to  the  ever-radiant  eye  of  God.  I  deny 
that  I  am  such  stuff  as  dreams  are  made  of;  and, 
filled  with  a  thought  sublime  even  as  that  which 
gave  the  '  Tempest '  birth,  let  me  repeat,  '  Before 
Abraham  was,  I  am.'  And  this  I  say  —  it  may  be 
with  only  partial  appreciation  of  its  signification  yet 
—  with  the  same  humility  as  when  a  child  I  wor 
shiped  the  Person  of  Jesus,  whom  continents  still 
unite  to  call  Divine." 

"  But  stop  a  minute,  friend :  you  do  not  really 
intend  to  say  that  Shakespeare,  when  he  wrote  this 
play,  had  all  this  elaborate  thought  in  his  mind  ? " 

"  Of  course  I  do.  His  mind  was  possessed  by  the 
spirit  of  the  same  philosophy,  and  it  was  so  real  to 
him  that  it  took  form  in  his  thought  as  an  imagina 
tive  play,  without  any  conscious  effort  on  his  part, 


RECONCILIA  TION.  245 

even  as  the  parables  of  Jesus  came  to  him.  My 
mind,  on  the  other  hand,  is  so  weak  in  its  wings  that 
it  will  not  fly  unless  it  is  well  spurred  by  Reason, 
and  this  is  why  I  am  condemned  to  this  infernal 
prose." 

"  Without  conscious  effort,  you  say,  the  genius  of 
Shakespeare  gave  expression  to  the  thought  of  the 
Tempest." 

"  Yes  ;  that  is,  without  special  effort  —  more  than 
is  required  for  a  conversation  like  this.  He  had  the 
truth,  and  gave  expression  to  it  precisely  as  it  im 
pelled  him  from  within.  That  gas-light  illuminates 
the  apartment,  and  the  sun  lights  up  a  number  of 
worlds,  and  as  the  illumination  of  the  gas  and  the 
light  of  the  sun,  so  the  word  of  the  poet  and  that  of 
the  Creator  of  the  universe.  And  herein  lies  one  of 
life's  great  lessons  :  let  the  Son  attend  to  his  Son- 
ship,  and  the  light  will  take  care  of  itself;  but 
should  he  forget  himself  for  a  moment,  in  self-con 
scious  concern  for  his  light  or  the  splendor  of  his 
appearance,  just  in  that  degree  he  loses  strength  and 
balance  and  becomes  less  luminous.  The  truly 
great  man  cares  little  for  the  accidents  and  effect  of 
good  being,  but  everything  for  good  being  itself. 
True  faith  is  the  tree,  and  good  works  are  the  fruit. 
It  was  beautiful  in  Jesus  to  say,  '  Let  your  light  so 
shine  before  men,  that  they  may  see  your  g 
works  and  glorify  your  Father  which  is  in  heaven.' 
But  this  thought  would  not  have  suffered  had  he 
also  said,  Let  your  light  shine  wherever  you  are, 
no  matter  whether  men  see  your  good  works  or 
not;  for,  come  what  will,  if  you  emit  any  light  it  of 


246  RECONCILIA  TION. 

necessity  adds  to  the  glory  of  God.  We  are  alto 
gether  too  fond  of  exhibiting  the  few  sparks  of  intel 
ligence  we  possess  to  require  exhortation  to  show 
them  off.  Not  that  I  would  advise  you  to  put  your 
light  under  a  bushel  of  diffidence  or  indifference, 
but  seek  to  give  light,  even  as  the  sun  giveth  his, 
without  regard  to  self-glorification.  Rest  assured  it 
is  sufficient  to  shine  with  the  light  of  Divine  Intelli 
gence  ;  for,  in  spite  of  all  shadow,  we  shall  be  effec 
tive  in  proportion  to  our  worth,  and  not  one  whit 
more  or  less.  I  sometimes  think  that  if  Jesus  had 
dwelt  longer  on  such  a  view  of  the  matter,  he  would 
not,  perhaps,  have  been  so  hasty  in  declaring  him 
self  the  Messiah  of  the  entire  race.  By  so  doing 
he  has  closed  ihe  eyes  of  many  of  his  people  to  the 
possible  advent  of  yet  a  greater  than  he,  of  a  more 
golden  fruit  on  the  tree  of  life.  What  cares  the 
king  of  day  for  the  genuflections  of  his  idolaters  ? 
He  has  too  much  to  be." 

"  So  you  blame  Jesus  for  allowing  himself  to  be 
called  the  king  of  the  Jews,  and  for  rejoicing  in  the 
name  of  Christ." 

"  By  no  means.  When  one  has  doubled  ten  talents 
who  blames  him  for  not  having  twenty-one  ?  Be 
yond  a  doubt,  had  Jesus  lived  a  little  longer,  and 
continued  to  grow  in  wisdom  and  in  the  love  of 
man,  he  would  have  taken  less  satisfaction  in  the 
worship  of  his  followers,  and  cared  less  for  mixing 
his  individuality  with  the  personality  of  God.  To 
say  the  least,  it  sounds  a  little  presumptuous  for 
any  person  in  the  form  of  a  man  to  say  that  none 
can  enter  the  Kingdom  of  Heaven  save  through  him. 


RECONCILIA  TION.  247 

Such  language,  together  with  that  which  indicates 
his  identity  with  God,  and  his  pre-existence  with 
him  before  the  world  was,  must  have  been  particu 
larly  offensive  to  the  orthodox  Jews  of  his  day. 
And  it  was  sure  to  lead  astray  blind  believers  in 
him  by  causing  them  to  confound  the  Particular 
with  the  Universal,  so  that  the  former  in  place  of  the 
latter  was  sure  to  become  the  object  of  their  devo 
tion.  It  is  not  the  isolated  phenomenon  of  Jesus 
that  we  should  worship,  but  the  Eternal  Spirit,  of 
whom  every  heroic  life  is  the  best  revelation.  God 
is  the  tree,  and  Christ  is  the  fruit." 

"  But  this  does  not  prevent  you  from  acknowl 
edging  that  that  mysterious  being  is  the  one  person 
most  worthy  of  worship  among  the  sons  of  men  ? " 

"No:  for  he  would  not  be  worshiped  as  he  now 
is  unless  he  had  earned  his  place  in  the  hearts  of 
his  fellows.  He  will  remain  in  his  present  position 
of  Divinity  until  he  becomes  superseded  by  a  greater 
than  he.  He  is  the  best  image  of  God  there  is, 
although  he  was  placed  betwixt  a  couple  of  thieves, 
and  made  to  blend  his  cry  of  divine  sympathy 
with  the  shrieks  of  stolid  guilt  and  pitiful  remorse." 

"  Do  you  not  attempt  to  take  his  place  in  thus 
venturing  to  criticise  him  ? " 

"  No  more  than  any  theological  whipster  who 
claps  him  into  the  throne  of  Jehovah  and  there  pro 
tects  him  with  his  quills,  even  as  the  Russian  serf 
guards  with  pointed  bayonet  the  person  of  his 
Czar.  I  tell  you  Christian  people  have  not  called 
themselves  depraved  for  the  last  few  centuries  with 
out  some  foundation  ;  and,  this  being  the  case,  it 


248  RECONCIIJA  TION. 

is  likely  enough  that  I,  who  have  associated  with 
them  should,  not  be  altogether  untainted  by  their 
communications.  I  humbly  confess  that  I  had  a 
human  father,  so  it  is  quite  possible  that  I  was 
not  immaculately  conceived.  I  own  my  weakness 
as  an  individual,  while  I  glory  in  my  strength  as  a 
person." 

"  That  is  strange  language,  Mr.  Shaft.  I  do  not 
care  for  your  distinction  between  the  person  and 
the  individual.  It  seems  artificial  in  the  highest 
degree,  and  although  it  may  be  serviceable  to  you 
as  a  technical  form  of  thought,  even  as  Fichte's 
'ego'  and  'non  ego'  were  to  him,  it  is  not  likely  to 
find  universal  acceptance  more  than  any  other  acci 
dental  speech  bearing  on  spiritual  being.  He  who  can 
appreciate  so  nice  a  distinction  will  prefer  some  form 
of  his  own  which  he  is  equally  able  to  invent  for  him 
self.  However,  it  may  be  something  to  ascend  so 
high  and  find  in  such  words  a  key  to  unlock  the 
mysteries  of  the  universe.  I  confess  myself  much 
obliged.  More  power  to  your  transcendentalism." 

"  O  Malcolm,  Malcolm,  your  power  to  satirize  all 
things  has  been  dearly  purchased.  You  realize  not 
how  much  you  have  lost  for  lack  of  habitual  rever 
ence  and  prayerful  worship  of  the  Supreme  Being,  as 
He  shines  through  all  men,  making  their  eyes  the 
windows  of  His  Heavens.  I  appreciate,  I  admire,  the 
dexterity  with  which  you  heat  your  iron  in  the  fire 
of  moral  energy.  But,  alas !  the  back  of  diseased 
humanity  is  not  so  much  in  need  of  cauterization 
as  of  the  application  of  gentler  remedies.  I  fear  you 
are  not  a  holy  man  ;  and,  mark  well  my  words,  you 


RECONCILIA  TION.  249 

condemn  yourself  to  perpetual  strife  with  the  ene 
mies  of  God  when  you  might,  if  you  pleased,  subdue 
them  with  much  less  sacrifice  of  spiritual  life.  But 
the  die  is  cast.  You  will  doubtless  carry  your 
cross  until  the  final  moment,  when  it  will  be  clear 
to  yourself,  at  least,  whether  you  are  really  a  king 
or  merely  one  of  the  mocking  phantasms  of  the 
times." 

"  You  are  not  wrong  in  this  estimate  of  me,  nor 
are  you  quite  right:  you  cannot  tell  all  that  passes 
within  your  own  bosom,  not  to  mention  mine.  Nor 
are  you,  in  spite  of  my  confessions,  familiar  enough 
with  my  past  life  to  form  an  adequate  idea  of  me. 
But,  as  it  is,  I  thank  you  for  your  sincerity,  and  I 
am  glad  to  escape  so  easily  from  the"  judgment-seat. 
Every  day,  I  suppose  you  are  aware,  is  a  day  of 
judgment  of  some  sort.  You,  then,  being  my  god  for 
the  nonce,  I  am  infinitely  obliged  for  the  "clear 
revelations  from  on  high,  not  only  in  regard  to  my 
self,  but  about  Shakespeare  and  the  rest  of  them. 
Good  by  :  I  am  off  for  the  West." 

"  Stay  yet  a  moment,  Malcolm.  Has  Deacon 
Crisp  recalled  you,  notwithstanding  your  infidelity 
to  the  popular  theology  ? " 

"  Yes,  but  reluctantly  enough.  However,  he  in 
tends  to  confer  with  me,  and  hopes  my  heart  will 
not  be  so  hardened  as  to  reject  the  salvation  prof 
fered." 

"And  let  his  daughter  go  ?" 

"  Yes  :  but  it  all  depends  upon  her.  She  repre 
sents  all  that  is  good  in  him  and  his  ;  and  she  is  mine 
forever,  in  spite  of  Pluffle  and  Fate.  I  care  not  for 


250 


RECONCILIA  TION. 


the  lucre  which  Crisp  has  piled  heaven  high,  intend 
ing  to  die  on  the  top  and  enter  thus  the  joy  of  his 
Lord.  But  unfortunately  he  is  more  than  two-thirds 
dead  already.  His  life  has  gone  with  his  love  and 
there  it  is  to  be  found.  Methinks  I  see  it  turn  into 
a  snake  with  scales  of  emerald  and  gold,  and  drag  its 
glistening  length  through  thickets  of  thorns.  What  a 
terrible  bush  are  those  plains  of  Mammon !  The 
skeletons  petrify  on  the  sands.  Blessed  Sol  him 
self  becomes  a  curse,  and  Earth,  with  parched 
hand,  waves  back  the  ghastly  morsels  prepared  for 
her  board." 

"  Yes,  you  are  right,  Malcolm.  But  even  skele 
tons  die;  and  herein,  in  the  negation  of  negation, — 
two  negatives  make  an  affirmative,  —  in  the  death, 
so  to  say,  of  Death  lies  the  hope  of  the  worst.  O 
thrice  blessed  optimism  !  Read  Goethe's  '  Dance  of 
the  Dead.'  During  the  dance  the  warden  stole  the 
shroud  of  a  particular  ghost  and  hung  it  on  the 
point  of  the  steeple.  The  poor  ghost  climbed  after  it 
like  a  huge  spider  on  the  wall.  But  the  moment  the 
skeleton  grasped  his  shroud  the  clock  of  the  church 
struck  one,  and  down  he  tumbled  head  over  heels 
to  his  utter  extinction.  What  an  example  of  acquired 
Life,  of  the  Ideal  attained  !  The  living  body  is  but  a 
chariot  of  fire,  and  when  it  has  borne  us  aloft  into 
the  regions  of  pure-mindedness,  it  falls  to  the  ground 
and  flattens  like  the  mantle  of  Elijah.  The  striking 
of  the  One  is  the  attainment  of  God,  and  behold,  it 
sends  Death  to  the  grave  forever.  The  cock-crow 
but  causes  him  to  reappear  with  new  vigor." 

"  Lucky  skeleton,  Mr.  Shaft !     Behold,  I  shatter, 


RECONCILIA  TION. 


251 


shatter,  shatter,  and  down  on  the  pavement  fall. 
Not  even  a  grain  of  dust  shall  I  leave  behind.  Good 
by,  old  bolt  from  on  high.  How  fragrant  the  breath 
of  the  morning !  See,  she  takes  me  in  her  hand, 
and  now  I  sit  on  her  wings.  Good  by,  good  by : 
I'll  soon  be  far  beyond.  Have  a  merry  heart.  I 
shall  come  back  with  a  lily." 

So  Malcolm  left ;  but  Mr.  Shaft,  in  spite  of  his 
optimism,  had  not  a  merry  heart,  for  he  sang  the 
song  of  the  gas  :  — 

"  A  student  lay  dying  alone, 

And  loud  was  the  song  of  the  gas  ; 

'  Thou  singest,'  cried  he,  with  a  groan, 

'  Of  her  who  lies  under  the  grass.' 

"'Ah  me  !  she  is  gone,'  was  his  sigh, 
'  And  left  me  to  die  in  this  room. 
Has  she  gone  to  brighten  the  sky, 
To  gladden  the  gate  of  the  tomb  ? 

"'To  cheat  me  of  Life  that  is  mine, 

Or  send  me  the  Light  that  I  craved  ? 
God,  give  me  the  Strength  that  is  thine  ; 
Without  it  I  will  not  be  saved.' 

"The  flame  simmered  low  in  reply, 

'  I  banished  Queen  Night  from  the  room  ; 
I  threw  but  a  glance  from  my  eye, 
And  down  went  her  banners  of  gloom. 

" '  I  chirrup  and  simmer  and  sing, 

And  flirt  with  the  fly  and  the  moth, 
And  caper  and  flicker  and  spring  ; 

And  light  up  the  gems  on  their  cloth.' 


252  RECONCILIA  TION. 

" '  Whilst  I,'  cried  this  man  who  could  see, 

'  Am  blind  to  all  things  but  her  face. 
Alas  !  there  is  nothing  for  me 
But  to  leave  this  wearisome  place. 

" '  A  Spirit  unbounded  is  mine  ; 

It  ebbs  at  the  thought  of  my  bride ; 
But  surges  like  seas  as  I  pine, 
To  rise  on  its  fathomless  tide. 


" '  A  weaver  of  garments  divine, 

I  plied  the  most  wonderful  loom ; 
Yet  she,  with  those  children  of  mine, 
Was  swept  to  a  pitiless  tomb. 

W'O  Spirit,  rise  higher  with  me, 

Or  lend  me  the  wings  of  a  dove, 
Yet  leave  in  the  depths  of  thy  sea 
This  ghost  with  the  ghosts  that  I  love  ! ' 

" '  How  foolish  men  are  ! '  cried  the  elf. 
'  I'm  happy  to  praise  my  own  name. 
Rejoice  in  the  light  of  yourself, 
You've  got  to  go  out  just  the  same. 

" '  I  rose  from  a  billow  of  gold, 

And  fled  by  the  duskiest  way, 
To  die  in  the  gloomiest  cold  ; 
But  I'll  laugh  so  long  as  I  stay. 

u '  Yes,  I,  but  a  flame  from  the  mill, 

Can  caper  and  flicker  and  gleam, 
While  humans,  the  gods  of  the  will, 
Are  eager  to  die  for  a  dream.' 


RE  CONCILIA  TION.  253 

" '  To  die  for  a  dream  ! '  is  his  moan, 

'  It's  not  for  a  dream,  but  a  death. 
Their  life  has  been  only  a  groan 
From  breast  of  Perpetual  Breath. 

" '  No  wonder  I  wither  and  die  ; 

Out,  out  is  the  light  of  my  life  ! 
Oh,  what,  at  this  moment,  am  I  ? 
An  apple  just  halved  by  the  knife.1 

u  The  flame  now  distended  its  core, 
And  lowered  its  beautiful  head, 
And  faint  were  the  rays  on  the  floor, 
For  the  lonely  student  was  dead." 


IV. 

A  STORM. 

MR.  CRISP  received  Malcolm  on  his  arrival 
in  Bragville  with  evident  kindness  and  re 
spect,  yet  there  was  a  something  latent  in  his  man 
ner  which  Malcolm  scarcely  liked.  It  was,  indeed, 
pretty  obvious  that  the  deacon  was  not  likely  to 
change  for  some  time  to  come  the  prejudices  natu 
ral  to  a  person  who  had  spent  his  life  in  advocating 
a  fixed  form  of  religion  in  favor  of  one  which  must 
appear  to  him  loose  and  extravagant.  Yet,  as  we 
said,  he  loved  the  boy,  and,  in  consideration-  of  the 
situation,  was  willing  to  tolerate  his  views ;  that 
is  to  say,  if  he  kept  them  within  the  bounds  of  mod 
eration.  Moreover,  he  was  not  altogether  without 
the  hope  that  his  prodigal  son-in-law,  that  was  to  be, 
would  soon  realize  the  impractical  character  of  his 
thought  in  view  of  the  self-evident  superiorities  of 
Bungle  and  Buzz,  the  great  luminaries  of  his  church. 

"  My  dear  boy,"  he  said,  a  week  after  his  return, 
as  Malcolm  stood  at  the  window  looking  out  into 
the  growing  dusk  with  a  melancholy  air,  "  I  have  a 
private  word  for  you  ;  let  me  have  your  attention." 

"  Certainly,  sir,"  said  the  youth,  turning  and  plac 
ing  his  eager  eyes  full  on  the  deacon's  face.  The 
deacon  blinked ;  yet,  recovering  himself  in  a  mo 
ment,  he  began :  — 

(254) 


RECONCILIA  TION. 


255 


"  While  I  admired  the  moral  sense  you  displayed 
in  speaking  your  mind  as  you  have  done,  it  has  been 
a  source  of  great  uneasiness  to  me  that  you  show 
no  signs  of  appreciating  the  name  of  the  Lord. 
But  discretion,  no  doubt,  will  come  with  years,  and 
whenever  it  does  come,  you  may  possess  my  daugh 
ter  with  my  blessing  and  glad  approval.  In  the 
meantime,  however,  I  grieve  to  say  that  I,  for  my 
part,  can  neither  honestly  nor  heartily  give  her 
to  you.  You  see  how  it  is.  She  has  decided  for 
herself;  and,  rather  than  begin  a  contest  which 
would  only  result  in  misery  for  all,  I  do  not  impose 
my  will  upon  her.  Now,  considering  this  state  of 
affairs,  you  cannot  expect  that  I  will  bestow  upon 
her  the  means  which,  with  the  Lord's  help,  I  hardly 
earned,  that  you  through  them  may  support  and 
propagate  your  unholy  opinions.  You  may  continue 
to  reside  here  in  my  house  as  her  husband,  where 
you  will  have  facilities  given  you  for  study  and 
research,  comfort  and  amusement.  But  beyond  this 
I  can  conscientiously  do  nothing  for  you,  so.  long  as 
you  think  as  you  now  do  in  matters  of  religion,  how 
ever  much  I  honor  the  self-respect  and  honesty  you 
have  heretofore  displayed.  And,  as  to  Jennie  her 
self,  it  is  my  duty  to  let  you  know  that  she  just  now 
has  nothing  of  her  own,  and  will  have  nothing  but 
what  I  choose  to  give  her.  Here,  then,  you  know 
how  I  am  to  stand  as  far  as  you  and  she  are  con 
cerned,  as  long  as  you  continue  to  set  your  face 
against  the  revealed  word  of  God." 

"  Dear  Mr.  Crisp,"  replied  Malcolm,  "  you  have 
relieved  my  mind  of  a  great  weight.  I  hated  the 


256  RECONCILIA  TION. 

ihought  and  abhorred  the  act  of  coming  to  partake 
of  the  bounty  of  one  who  could  not  give  it  with  a 
whole  heart.  Know  once  and  forever  that,  in  spite 
of  the  strong  attractions,  it  is  absolutely  impossible 
for  me  to  remain  longer  in  your  house  than  friend 
ship  requires.  No,  the  Heavens  will  jiot  fall.  I 
love  your  daughter.  Yes,  I  love  your  daughter  even 
as  I  love  my  true  self;  yet  not  even  for  her  sake 
could  I  so  far  forget  myself  as  to  exist  under  the 
conditions  you  specify.  If  I  am  to  receive  the  gift 
of  your  daughter,  I  take  her  with  a  whole  heart,  and 
remember  that  she,  being  mine,  must  remain  inde 
pendent  of  those  who  have  no  confidence  in  her 
husband." 

"  13ut,  my  dear  boy,"  said  the  deacon,  anxiously, 
"  be  reasonable.  Neither  of  you  have  any  property 
of  your  own,  nor  are  you  likely  to  possess  any,  un 
less  you  meet  with  unexpected  good  luck.  You  see, 
in  my  house  you  will  have  everything  you  can 
wish." 

"  But  self-respect.  No,  Mr.  Crisp,  I  can  wait  yet  a 
while.  Present  gratification  is  not  that  which  I 
most  desire  ;  nor  would  I  accept  salvation  itself 
on  the  terms  prescribed.  And,  to  tell  you  the 
truth,  I  am  glad  that  we  have  come  to  this  under 
standing  of  one  another.  I  own  myself  deceived  by 
the  contents  of  your  last  letter.  How  could  a  radi 
cal  enthusiast  expect  to  find  a  father's  love  in  a  con 
firmed  believer  of  your  stamp  ?  It  is  plain  that  I 
am  not  self-sacrificing  enough  to  be  worthy  of  you. 
You  cannot  tolerate  me,  and  how  can  you  presume 
that  I  will  tolerate  you  ?  Alas !  I  know  myself  of 


RECONCILIA  TION. 


257 


old,  and  how  bitter  the  memory !  Adversity  I 
gladly  accept ;  it  is  much  more  congenial  to  me 
than  prosperity.  Yes,  Deacon  Crisp,  I  would 
rather  go,  for  I  have  a  great  deal  to  do." 

"  What  do  you  propose  to  do  ? " 

"  Preach  the  gospel  to  every  living  person." 

"  What  gospel  ? " 

"  My  own." 

"  Not  Christ  at  all  ? " 

"  Only  in  so  far  as  he  harmonizes  with  me.  He 
is  an  admirable  illustration  of  the  Wisdom  and  Love 
I  aspire  to  preach." 

"  '  Admirable  illustration,'  —  confound  your  blas 
phemy  ! "  roared  the  deacon,  firing  up;  for  the  self- 
possessed  irony  of  Malcolm  exasperated  him.  "  I 
tell  you  what  it  is,  Malcolm  Lawson,  I  see  nothing 
for  us  but  complete  separation.  Go,  if  you  will,  and 
take  her  with  you." 

"  No,  Mr.  Crisp,  I  will  not  take  her  from  her 
present  home  till  I  can  give  her  one  of  her  own  ;  and 
that  may  be  never,  for  I  am  a  poor  hand  at  money- 
making.  Nor  would  I  rob  you  of  the  pride  and  the 
greatest  joy  of  your  life.  Keep  her  till  I  am  able 
to  do  her  the  justice  her  talents  and  position  re 
quire." 

Here  the  deacon  wept ;  and,  throwing  himself 
into  a  chair,  gave  himself  up  to  the  emotion  of 
his  heart.  At  this  moment  Miss  Crisp  entered  and 
asked,  in  a  tone  of  alarm,  what  was  the  matter. 

Said  Malcolm,  "Jennie,  it  is  not  in  the  nature  of 
things  that  your  father  and  I  can  agree  in  that  ele 
ment  of  peace  which  would  make  my  stay  in  his 
17 


258  R  ECO  NCI  LI  A  TION. 

house  tolerable  for  any  length  of  time.  He  is,  indeed, 
willing  to  give  his  consent  to  our  marriage,  but  says 
he  cannot  do  so  as  honestly  and  heartily  as  he 
would  if  I  was  more  of  a  Christian.  Moreover,  he 
offers  me,  as  a  proof  of  his  regard,  his  house  for  a 
home,  there  to  remain,  under  his  surveillance,  de 
pendent  upon  him  for  the  bread  I  eat  and  the 
clothes  I  wear.  That  is  impossible." 

"  It  is  not  impossible  !  "  cried  the  young  lady,  her 
blue  eyes  burning  with  the  fire  she  inherited  from 
her  father ;  "  you  shall  remain,  and  he  shall  do  all 
in  his  power  to  make  you  stay,  while  we  both  unite 
to  make  you  free  as  the  air :  for,  at  bottom,  he 
loves  you  even  as  he  loves  me,  and  there  can  be  no 
limit  to  his  love.  Do  not  be  foolish,  Malcolm,  and 
make  martyrs  of  us  both  to  no  earthly  purpose. 
I  declare  to  Heaven,  and  positively  swear,  that,  if 
you  go,  I  will  go  too,  and  work,  if  necessary,  till 
my. fingers  bleed." 

"  Now,  dear  Jennie,"  replied  Malcolm  in  the 
same  serene  tone  as  he  replied  to  the  deacon, 
"you  cannot  expect  your  father  to  have  perfect 
confidence  in  one  who  seems  to  deny  what  he 
affirms  to  be  essential  to  Eternal  Life,  and  just  con 
sider  what  that  mystic  word  means  to  your  father. 
Life  Eternal  —  Eternal,  —  and  he-has  given  his  life, 
as  he  thinks,  to  secure  this  blessedness." 

"  I  do  not  care  what  it  means,"  cried  the  excited 
maiden  ;  "  I  am  tired  to  death  of  this  word-mock 
ery.  Would  you  stab  my  soul  with  radical  con 
ceit,  and  sacrifice  my  life  on  the  altar  of  your  whim  ? 
Do  you  think  that  I  will  see  honesty  baulked,  integ- 


RECONCILIATION. 


rity  impeached,  and  wisdom  banished  for  all  the 
creeds  in  the  world  ?  For  shame,  Malcolm,  and  you, 
too,  father  !  Why  should  you  allow  contemptible  dif 
ferences  to  part  you  from  that  which  you  love  most  ? 
What  right  have  you,  Malcolm,  what  right  have  you, 
father,  after  having  come  so  near  in  your  agreement, 
to  say,  Here  are  the  limits  of  our  love  ?  Leave  it  all 
to  Him  who  lives  in  my  love  for  you  both,  and  all 
will  yet  be  well." 

"  Alas,  Jennie,"  said  Malcolm,  "  you  take  me  away 
from  myself.  I  love  you,  oh,  how  I  love  you  !  yet 
even.  as  I  love  you  I  will  do  nothing  which  shall  pre 
vent  me  from  loving  you  as  a  true  man.  Gladly, 
right  gladly  would  I  remain  here,  if  I  could  in  jus 
tice  to  us  all.  But  there  is  work  for  me  to  do.  Will 
it  grieve  your  soul  to  know  that  I  am  about  my 
Father's  business  ?  " 

"  But  your  Father's  business  is  also  my  Father's 
business  ;  and  I  will  not  let  you  go  alone.  You  be 
sought  me  to  cultivate  my  will.  I  have  done  that,  ' 
and  you  must  take  me  as  I  am.  I  have  said  it,  and 
go  I  will.  I  care  not  for  wealth  ;  your  love  is  all 
I  ask,  and  that  I  will  have,  in  spite  of  the  world." 

Here  Mr.  Crisp,  moved  by  this  strange  dialogue, 
arose,  and,  with  outstretched  hands,  cried,  "  You  are 
made  for  one  another  ;  foolish  man  that  I  was  to  try 
to  part  what  God  has  joined  together.  I  take  you, 
Malcolm,  to  my  heart,  even  as  I  have  taken  Jennie  ; 
and  henceforth,  I  trust,  we  will  bear  with  the  infir 
mities  of  one  another." 

"Father  Crisp,  and  you,  Jennie,  my  bride,"  cried 
Malcolm,  unshaken,  "I  thank  you  for  your  kindness, 


26o  RECONCILIA  TION. 

devotion,  resignation,  worship  ;  but  hear  me  once 
more :  I  dare  not  trust  myself  to  stay  here,  all 
guarded,  even  as  I  would  be,  by  the  wealth  of  your 
combined  affections.  I  am  strong  only  when  I  am 
alone,  far  away  in  the  wilderness  of  the  world  which 
I  call  mine.  I  will  not  stop  to  explain  ;  my  con 
duct  and  my  work  will  explain  themselves." 

With  a  look  of  anguish,  yet  with  a  fierce  lustre 
in  his  eyes,.  Malcolm  waved  a  farewell  to  Jennie,  and 
turned  to  leave,  when  a  cry  of  despair  fell  upon  his  ear. 
It  was  from  her.  Poor  child,  this  unexpected  turn  of 
affairs  was  too  much  for  her,  and,  having  cried 
aloud,  she  fell  upon  the  floor  as  dead.  Scarlet 
drops  oozed  from  her  lips,  showing  that  a  blood 
vessel  had  yielded  to  the  tumult  within.  This 
sad  spectacle  wrought  an  instantaneous  change  in 
Malcolm's  mind,  and  he  flew  to  take  her  in  his  arms, 
that  he  might  give  her  relief,  while  her  father  tot 
tered  a  moment,  and  then  distractedly  called  for 
help,  wringing  his  hands  and  reproaching  Malcolm 
for  his  hardness  of  heart.  We  will  not  repeat  what 
Malcolm  said  in  this  moment  of  grief  and  anxiety. 
Not  till  the  physician  had  come,  and  given  the  assur 
ance  that,  although  Jennie  had  received  severe  in 
ternal  injury,  the  chances  were  that  she  would  be 
saved,  did  Mr.  Crisp  and  he  become  themselves 
again.  Then  he  said  to  the  deacon,  "  In  my  de 
spair  I  called  you  Jepthah.  But  what  right  had  I  to 
do  it,  when,  in  false  exaltation  of  soul,  I  almost 
killed  her  myself.  Good  Heavens !  where  was  my 
mind,  or  where  indeed  was  common  pity,  not  to  say 
the  sense  which  I  boasted  ?  Had  we  actually  bent 


RECONCILIA  TION.  26 1 

a  couple  of  young  trees  into  close  embrace,  and 
then,  having  tied  her  between,  let  them  snap  back, 
leaving  her  torn  form  to  glut  the  vision  of  Moloch, 
we  could  not  have  done  worse.  But  I  was  worse  than 
you.  In  the  jealousy  of  my  soul,  I  had  become  my 
own  lago,  and  done  with  a  speech  the  work  of  a  pil 
low.  Fool,  fool,  that  I  was !  How  could  I,  who 
strove  for  the  highest,  doom  myself  thus  ?  Verily, 
had  I  killed  her,  a  blight  had  fallen  on  my  tree  of 
life,  and  justly,  too,  for  behold,  murder  was  its  fruit." 
"  Ah,  yes,  Malcolm,  we  have  not  been  wise,  but  I 
will  meet  you  more  than  half  way  :  and  hear  me  now. 
Satisfied  with  your  purity  of  intention  and  whole 
ness  of  heart,  I  shall  trust  you  henceforth,  even  if 
it  is  not  given  me  to  understand  the  peculiarities  of 
your  mind.  I  can  well  see  that  your  nature  is  deep, 
so  deep,  indeed,  that  its  roots,  for  aught  I  know, 
may  extend  to  the  bottomless  pit.  But  such  as  it 
is,  I  cannot  reject  it  at  the  frightful  expense  which 
is  threatened,  even  to  uphold  the  creed  of  my 
fathers.  That,  evidently,  judging  from  the  dissen 
sions  in  the  Church  and  the  iniquity  of  its  princi 
pal  defenders,  as  seen  in  the  late  scandals,  is  doomed 
to  speedy  annihilation,  and  I,  Thomas  Crisp,  am 
driven  to  confess  it ;  for,  to  save  my  soul,  I  cannot 
see  the  sense  of  preaching  redemption  through 
Christ's  merits,  when  mere  boys  like  you  and  such 
as  Bungle  rely  exclusively  on  their  own.  I  must 
confess  the  whole  thing  far  exceeds  my  understand 
ing  ;  but,  whether  or  not,  I  began  with  Christ  for 
my  guide,  and  I  have  made  my  choice  for  all  time. 
However,  I  am  glad  to  find  that  there  is  still  an 


262  RECONCILIA  TION. 

honest  man  in  the  world,  and  repeat  my  assertions 
of  entire  confidence  in  you ;  for  obedience  to  the 
ten  commandments  seems  to  be  the  object  of  your 
life.  So  I  will  not  ask  you  to  bend  before  my  God, 
if  you  will  but  worship  your  own  in  spirit  and  in 
truth.  In  spite  of  myself,  I  love  you  even  as  I  do 
my  poor  child  there,  and  gladly  embrace  you  as  my 
own  son  ;  so  pray  let  us  forget  in  this  act  of  recon 
ciliation  our  mutual  suffering  for  one  another." 


V. 


A  RAINBOW,  THE  TRUE  LOVERS'  KNOT. 

"  Now  Israel  loved  Joseph  more  than  all  his  children,  because  he  was 
the  sen  of  his  old  age  :  and  he  made  him  a  coat  of  many  colors." 

THE  vicarious  suffering  of  his  daughter  seemed 
to  have  made  Deacon  Crisp  more  thoughtful 
than  ever,  and  he  had  several  talks  about  religion 
with  Malcolm,  who,  from  the  same  cause,  had  become 
less  combative. 

"  My  dear  Malcolm,"  said  the  Deacon  with  an 
affectionate  look,  yet  in  rather  a  formal  manner, 
which  indicated  that  he  had  a  prepared  speech  to 
deliver  (this  was  when  Jennie  was  almost  well),  "  the 
more  I  see  of  you,  the  harder  I  find  it  to  separate 
your  views  from  Christianity  as  originally  taught  by 
our  Lord.  In  fact,  if  I  dare  trust  my  own  judgment, 
you,  when  unbiased  by  your  unaccountable  hatred 
of  miracles,  do  not  say  a  single  word  against  True 
Religion  as  I  understand  it.  So,  when  I  dwell  upon 
this,  and  consider  at  the  same  time  that  your  belief  in 
a  personal  devil  still  remains  unimpaired,  I  am  loth  to 
take  a  despairing  view  of  your  case.  Now  when 
a  man,  however  radical  in  other  respects,  has  the 
strength  to  hold  on  to  the  latter  essential  of  the 
Faith,  he  is  not  so  radically  bad  as  some  theologians 
maintain.  Considering,  then,  this  important  evi 
dence  of  latent  orthodoxy  together  with  your  invio- 

(263) 


264  RECONCILIA  TION. 

late  integrity,  which  is,  no  doubt,  the  result  of  careful 
searching  of  the  Scriptures,  I  think  it  quite  likely 
that  the  Rev.  Messrs.  Tightcreed,  Lullaby,  and  Buzz 
would  oblige  me  and  kindly  overlook  your  past  and 
restore  you  to  their  lost  confidence.  I  am  just  on 
the  receipt  of  a  note  from  Lullaby,  in  answer  to  one 
wherein  I  asked  him  and  his  brethren  to  exert  their 
influence  in  your  behalf.  He  informs  me  that  the 
Church  of  the  New  Messiah  is  vacant,  and  his  influ 
ence  is  not  to  be  sneered  at.  Both  Tightcreed  and 
Buzz  are  under  his  thumb.  But  here  is  the  letter,  — 
see  for  yourself."  And  Malcolm  took  the  letter  and 
read  aloud  :  — 

Dear  Brother  Crisp,  -  CHURCH  OF  SAL™ON  s™ 

I  have  to  thank  you  for  your  kind  letter,  enclosing  subscrip 
tion  for  P.  Bungle's  defense,  and  asking  me  to  recall  the  letter 
of  excommunication  which  we,  in  the  faithful  performance  of 
our  Christian  duty,  sent  to  Mr.  Lawson.  I  have  to  say,  in 
reply,  that,  after  due  consideration  and  many  prayers  for 
Divine  guidance,  I,  with  Brothers  Tightcreed  and  Buzz,  will 
be  glad  to  see  your  young  friend  once  more  —  say  the  evening 
of  the  rst  of  next  month  —  in  my  vestry  here,  with  a  view  to 
reconciliation.  But  please  to  remember,  my  dear  brother,  the 
untoward  peculiarities  of  the  young  man,  —  his  inordinate  love 
of  contradiction  for  the  mere  sake  of  contradiction,  the  ab 
ruptness  of  his  style,  the  frightful  ambiguity  of  his  thought, 
and,  above  all,  the  dangerous  egotism,  not  to  say  conceit, 
which  vitiates  his  every  thought  and  deed ;  but,  since  all  his 
faults  must  be  plainly  visible  to  your  illuminated  eye,  —  an 
eye,  indeed,  which  has  rarely  or  never  been  deceived,  — it  is 
quite  unnecessary  for  me  to  enumerate  them.  Yet,  enormous 
and  numerous  as  they  are,  it  behooveth  us  to  bear  in  mind 
that  we  are  all  included  in  that  terrible  fall  from  Blessedness, 
dating  from  the  Garden  of  God ;  and,  were  it  not  for  the  light 
of  the  Son,  those  beams  of  perfect  charity  which  enfold  us  in 


RECONCILIA  TION. 


265 


our  falling  state,  giving  each  one  of  us  the  rainbow  garment 
of  Hope  and  Peace,  we  were  nothing  in  ourselves.  So,  what 
I  have  to  suggest  at  this  moment  is  that,  in  Lawson's  case, 
only  the  most  fervent  appreciation  of  the  Divine  Love,  as 
manifest  in  the  dear  Saviour,  can  atone  for  his  lamentable 
deficiencies.  Now,  if,  on  re-examination,  he  turns  out  to  have 
this  appreciation,  and,  at  the  same  time,  exhibits  a  conciliatory 
disposition,  it  is  quite  possible  that  I,  with  Brother  Bungle's 
help,  may  prevail  on  Brothers  Tightcreed  and  Buzz  to  assist 
at  his  ordination.  Of  course  you  are  aware  that  the  fact  of 
disbelief  in  the  miracles  is  a  hard  thing  to  overlook  ;  yet 
there  are  many  ways  of  making  this  painful  disclosure.  The 
Church,  I  am  happy  to  say,  is  always  charitable  to  those  who 
speak  with  due  regard  to  the  religious  sensibilities  of  her  chil 
dren  ;  and  if,  as  I  advise,  Mr.  L.  displays  an  amicable  disposi 
tion,  it  will  not  be  without  effect  on  Brothers  Tightcreed  and 
Buzz,  and  their  constituents. 

Again  :  in  regard  to  the  merits  of  the  youth,  I  side  with  you 
in  respecting  the  tenacity  of  his  thought  and  faithful  adhesion 
to  the  principles  of  morality,  while  I  cannot  help  admiring  the 
aptness  of  his  illustrations  and  the  reach  of  his  mind.  Evi 
dently  there  is  enough  in  him  to  justify  your  anxiety  to  restore 
him  to  the  bosom  of  his  legitimate  mother,  the  Church  ;  and 
no  doubt,  if  successful,  you  will  not  be  without  reward  in  a 
fairer  realm.  But,  dear  brother,  lebme  use  the  privilege  of  an 
old  friend,  and  speak  with  the  utmost  frankness  :  be  on  your 
guard  lest  you  sacrifice  too  much  for  the  sake  of  reclaiming 
one  prodigal  son;  although,  be  it  said,  there  is  more  joy  in 
Heaven  over  one  sinner  that  repenteth  than  over  ninety-nine 
that  went  not  astray.  Lawson  has,  indeed,  much  to  do  before 
he  can  fully  justify  his  conduct  to  Christian  people,  for  the 
infidelity  of  years  is  hard  to  eradicate  ;  but  if,  through  special 
grace  from  On  High,  he  is  permitted  to  follow  your  advice 
and  mine,  none  of  us  will  leave  a  single  stone  unturned  to 
help  him  upward  and  onward.  The  Church  of  the  New  Mrs- 
siah  is  vacant,  and  the  public  have  more  confidence  than  i 
in  our  ministrations.  What  a  pity  that  your  prot<5g<5  sh> 
have  been  the  only  one  in  our  institution,  except  Mr.  Ernest 


266  RECONCILIA  TION. 

Hart,  who  failed  to  appreciate  the  genius  of  Brother  Progres 
sive,  the  most  brilliant  luminary  of  our  system  !  Yet,  perhaps 
I  am  wrong  to  mention  him  in  this  connection,  considering  the 
thick  cloud  which  darkens  his  fair  fame.  However,  I  shall 
take  occasion  to  request  your  prayers  for  the  bark  which  car 
ries  his  good  name.  'Tis  true  that  it  has  risen  "on  hills 
of  seas,  Olympus  high,"  but,  alas,  only  "to  duck  again  as 
low  as  Hell's  from  Heaven."  But,  O  blessed  freedom  of  speech 
and  press,  how  can  we  thank  thee  for  all  that  thou  hast 
done  to  vindicate  outraged  innocence  ?  Veritably,  in  this 
Christian  period,  when  quackery  and  puffery  are  unknown, 
but  a  faint  breath  from  thy  lips  is  sufficient  to  dispel  the 
storm,  and  save  the  ship  of  our  love.  For  a  surety,  Brother 
Crisp,  Public  Opinion  is  a  fiery  sea ;  but  is  there  not  always  a 
Saviour  for  the  faithful  ?  So  let  us  return  thanks  to  those 
kind  angels  of  the  Lord  who  have  stood  with  our  brother 
in  the  midst  of  the  flames,  —  those  flames  which  have  been 
seven  times  hotter  than  ever  before  withstood  by  servant  of 
Jehovah.  Yes,  Brother  Crisp,  I  am  happy  to  say  that,  as 
yet,  not  even  the  smell  of  fire  pertaineth  to  his  garments  ; 
nor  is  there  a  hair  of  his  head  injured,  although  many  of 
his  adversaries,  especially  those  who  launched  him,  have  suf 
fered  severely.  Is  it  not  written,  "  Whoso  believeth  in  me 
shall  never  die  "  ?  Thanks,  then,  to  the  Lord  for  his  goodness, 
and  to  such  as  you,  brother,  who  publicly  announce  your  love 
and  esteem  for  the  great  Progressive  Bungle  in  this  his  great 
hour  of  trial.  "  Blessed  are  they  which  are  persecuted  for 
righteousness'  sake  :  for  theirs  is  the  kingdom  of  heaven." 

You  will  see,  brother,  from  the  above,  that,  owing  to  Pro 
gressive's  unfortunate  situation,  I  am  left  to  be  sole  advocate 
in  behalf  of  your  radical  prote'ge' ;  but  rest  assured  that  I  will 
do  my  best  to  meet  your  wishes,  as  well  as  Mr.  Lawson's 
spiritual  vagabondism  will  allow. 

Yours  in  Christ, 

SIMON  LULLABY. 

"  Dear  Mr.  Crisp,"  cried  Malcolm,  tossing  the  let 
ter  on  the  floor,  "  I  am  much  obliged  to  you  and  Dr. 


RECONCILIA  TION. 


267 


Lullaby,  But  please  to  know,  once  and  forever,  that 
I  can  have  nothing  to  do  with  him  and  his  associates. 
They  are  wholly  opposed  to  my  work  in  every  sense 
of  the  word  of  God.  Indeed  it  is  not  in  the  nature 
of  things  that  I,  notwithstanding  my  adherence  to 
the  personal  devil,  can  consort  with  them.  So  it  is 
quite  unnecessary  to  re-open  the  book  of  my  past  ex 
perience.  I  fear  I  am  dead  to  your  church,  in  so  far 
as  it  is  represented  by  such  as  they,  and  it  to  me." 

"  But  what  do  you  intend  to  do,  my  dear  boy  ? " 
cried  the  Deacon,  testily,  in.  a  state  of  great  excite 
ment.  "  I  certainly  hate  to  ask  you  this  question 
again,  but  I  cannot  see  how  to  help  it.  So,  for 
God's  sake,  let  me  know  what  you  are  going  to  do 
with  your  radicalism.  What  are  you  going  to  do 
with  your  radicalism  ? " 

"  To  tell  the  Truth,  as  I  conceive  it,  without  regard 
to  cost,  and  with  all  my  heart  and  soul.  I  am  preach 
ing  now,  and  I  do  not  see  how  I  can  become  anything 
but  a  minister  in  the  original  sense  of  the  word.  Is 
the  merit  of  the  prophet  to  be  measured  by  tributes 
of  popularity  and  applause  ?  If  so,  your  Lord,  when 
he  was  most  of  a  man,  was  nowhere  ;  and  the  great 
est  prophets  but  fugitives  in  the  desert,  fed  by  rav> 
and  strangers.  Last  night  I  preached,  and  the  day 
before,  and  the  night,  too.  In  truth,  I  do  not  think 
I  am  good  for  much  else." 

"That's  right,  Malcolm.  Keep  yourself  before 
the  people,  —  keep  yourself  before  the  people.  Your 
preaching  is  often  good  ;  and  sometimes  I  catch  my 
self  listening,  even  against  the  whisperings  of  con 
science.  But  if  you  do  not  wholly  despise  secului 


268  RECONCILIA  TION. 

promotion,  there  are  other  ministers  in  the  Chris 
tian  Church  besides  Tightcreecl,  Lullaby,  and  Buzz. 
What  do  you  say  to  the  Rev.  Messrs.  Faithful  Per 
formance,  Common  Duty,  and  Frank  Declaration  ? 
Surely,  your  radicalism  will  not  suffer  by  co-opera 
tion  with  them,  even  if  they  do  belong  to  the  Church. 
Their  congregations,  it  is  true,  are  not  large  ;  but,  as 
everything  must  have  a  beginning,  it  will  not  do  to 
ignore  their  existence  entirely.  Perhaps  you  might 
be  induced  to  co-operate  with  them." 

"  O,  dear  sir  !  how  can  I  express  my  gratitude  ?  I 
have  long  sought  a  better  acquaintance  with  those 
dignitaries  of  the  Invisible  Church,  but  found  it  hard 
work.  They  were  so  busy  doing  good  to  others,  or 
engaged  in  self-improvement,  that  they  had  but  little 
time  to  waste  on  one  like  me.  But  I  had  no  idea 
that  you  were  so  intimate  with  them  as  to  risk  the 
introduction  of  so  confirmed  an  egotist  as  I  am. 
Pray  do  not  hesitate  a  moment.  My  mind  is  open, 
and  there  is,  I  fear,  a  great  vacuum  to  be  filled  by 
them." 

"  Spoken  like  a  worthy  son  of  the  True  Church," 
cried  Mr.  Crisp,  with  an  excess  of  enthusiasm,  "  even 
if  you  are  somewhat  peculiar  in  your  views.  I  have 
already  sent  for  those  clergymen,  the  companions  of 
my  boyhood,  when  I  worked  twelve  honest  hours  a 
day  for  five  dollars  a  month  and  board.  They  cut 
my  acquaintance  when  I  went  into  the  railroad-bond 
business  ;  and,  depend  upon  it,  I  would  not  ask  them 
hither,  were  it  not  for  your  sake.  They  will  be  here 
in  three  minutes,  when  we  shall  see  what  can  be 
done  for  you." 


RECONCILIA  TION. 


269 


At  the  time  specified,  the  said  gentlemen  arrived. 
To  the  surprise  of  Mr.  Crisp,  Mr.  Frank  Declaration 
recognized  in  Malcolm  an  old  friend  in  whom  he  had 
great  hopes,  yet,  at  the  same  time,  he  wondered  to 
see  him  so  intimate  with  Mr.  Crisp  ;  but,  on  hearing 
the  circumstances,  his  wonder  departed,  and  he 
expressed  pleasure  thereat.  However,  in  answer  to 
Mr.  Crisp's  request  that  he  would  use  his  influence 
to  advance  the  material  welfare  of  the  youth,  he  was 
forced  to  declare  that  his  influence  in  the  Church 
was  small.  "  Yet,"  said  he,  "  such  as  it  is,  he  shall 
have  the  full  benefit  of  it." 

Mn  Performance,  on  the  other  hand,  was  rather 
slow  in  coming  forward  with  any  definite  offer  of 
assistance  ;  but  this  was  to  be  expected  in  him,  as 
he  was  not  given  to  rash  promises. 

"  Of  late  years,"  said  he,  "  I  confess,  with  pain,  my 
influence  among  wealthy  Christians  has  been  wo- 
fully  on  the  wane  ;  and,  unless  Mr.  Lawson  possesses 
unusual  merit,  I  can  do  but  little  for  him.  To  be 
quite  frank,  I  scarcely  like  his  style.  Here  and 
there  fatal  weaknesses  are  discernible,  and  it  is 
altogether  too  negative  to  benefit  the  cause  of  True 
Philosophy.  Nor  are  his  imperfections  to  be  attrib 
uted  to  youth  alone.  Sin  has  lessened  him  by  one- 
half  of  his  natural  stature,  and  the  best  half  at  that ; 
but  he  knows  what's  the  matter,  and  there  is,  after 
all,  some  chance  for  him.  No  doubt,  with  the  active 
aid  of  Mr.  Duty  here,  he  will  become  a  profitable 
servant.  Yes,  unmistakably,  Mr.  Duty  is  the  man 
for  him,  and,  if  he  endorses  him,  I  have  nothing  fur 
ther  to  say." 


UNIVERSITY  OF  CALIFORNIA  LIBRARY 

Los  Angeles 
This  book  is  DUE  on  the  last  date  stamped  below. 


N* 


Form  L9-75m-7,'61  (Cl437s4)444 


UC  SOUTHE 


II I    mi  IIH  inn  Mini  "•••        

AA      000033405   2 


PS 

2244 

L5604r 


